AAArrrrggghhh job problem with my Cap!!!

It's kind of wonderful and kind of fucked up...
Cap and I applied for this position as live in caretakers for this little island resort halfway through last year.
The couple who were there then changed their minds and extended their stay so we dropped the thought and went on with our lives.
Now we've been reoffered the position if we are still interested and Cap emailed them immediately saying we were keen etc etc it would be a wonderful opportunity but he lied about something on the resume. (Big no no as far as I'm concerned). Lol

Not only that but it is a huge move spanning twelve months possibly longer, and I pointed out I would have to find some way to look after my car and also our pets! He is also in recovery and I expressed concern that such a big career change might be too soon. Which he took personally very much to heart. 😢

I think it's feasible and we can do it but very unCap like he is swept up with the idea while I want to mull it over first....

Financially I could earn what I earn now working 25 hours a week instead of 70 but as I explained to him that's still not very much...

I just really want to feel his enthusiasm about this! To leap into the unknown and do something together but if it falls through or doesn't work out we could come back to a difficult situation.
What do you think, is it worth the risk?

Yeh, money talks absolutely!
We have time to decide- job commences end of Jan/Feb. But Cap is just leaping on the decision right now! He wants it, he wants it bad and I feel terrible trying to plod out the logistics of it BEFORE I make that decision.
He is,looking for a YEAH LETS GO from me but I have brought my concerns to the table and he has taken my doubts and questions personally...
For me it's leaving a ten year job, I'm starting annual leave this Monday for two weeks, the interview is interstate so flights just for an interview, then notice, then somehow flights to this island plus as I said things to be taken care of here. Pets, vehicles, bills, etc

I just don't know how to make up my mind...

@impulsiv, that is so true and would be a great option but it's an island, and the resort is all there is lol... I suppose we could offer to man the bar too though!!

@clueless, you took the words right out of my mouth! But maybe I'm coming off as a Negative Nancy. He wants LETS DO THIS and then considerations, me the other way round... No sense in committing off the bat if something becomes a roadblock... I don't want to jeopardise my current job.

@lucciferi you're right, I just steamrolled him with the problems and maybe he's on a different wavelength lol

I can say that he's taken it very much as a lack of trust in him on my part...
So that's terrible but the issues remain, and I can't make this decision without knowing he knows they are important to discuss regardless...

^^^ this is what I want to hear!! And feel!!
I know this is all true, I know this is probably how he sees it too, I just can't help worrying a bit... And I want to cover a few concerns before we celebrate lol
Thanks xxoo!

Create a spreadsheet of pros and cons. Show it to him and ask for his input. Caps respond to spreadsheets.

Explain your concerns in a rational, realistic way and ask for his opinions in ways to solve your concerns. Like, if it doesn't work out, could you have an agreement with your current employer that you could come back in the future? He may offer some ideas you haven't thought of.

How often would you have time off to leave the island and get a taste for civilization apart from the island? Could come home and visit often?

It looks like this is his dream job and he's feeling like you are holding him back from his dream. He's disappointed you're not as excited as he is, you were before so what's changed? He might think you don't have faith in him or that you're not as committed as he thought you were. He might need some reassurance.

What's the worse that could happen? Sounds like a fun gig to me. 🙂

All of the above is SO relevant and absolutely on key,
But I was like this the last time as well - it just was withdrawn from the table fairly quickly so our hopes were not as high I suppose.

It's not even his dream job though, it fits into his future very well. But not essential to his career, if you know what I mean.
He is a screenwriter but he has just started a web series that made it into La Web fest and there is no way he could continue that from this island / I mean you need a film crew, co-writer, the set is specific, and so on and so on...
So Figuratively speaking five minutes ago he was yelling down the phone about traveling to LA and plans to crowd fund for his series- super excited etc etc

and now it's the same story with care taking on an island...? Puhlease!

He doesn't know what he wants at the moment he's just itching for a sea change, and I'm happy to comply but I need to know it's committed. This is a job is a job is a job after all, and I currently am happily employed for ten years where I am, he isn't "employed" he works on his own time...

Posted by wagtail
All of the above is SO relevant and absolutely on key,
But I was like this the last time as well - it just was withdrawn from the table fairly quickly so our hopes were not as high I suppose.

It's not even his dream job though, it fits into his future very well. But not essential to his career, if you know what I mean.
He is a screenwriter but he has just started a web series that made it into La Web fest and there is no way he could continue that from this island / I mean you need a film crew, co-writer, the set is specific, and so on and so on...
So Figuratively speaking five minutes ago he was yelling down the phone about traveling to LA and plans to crowd fund for his series- super excited etc etc

and now it's the same story with care taking on an island...? Puhlease!

He doesn't know what he wants at the moment he's just itching for a sea change, and I'm happy to comply but I need to know it's committed. This is a job is a job is a job after all, and I currently am happily employed for ten years where I am, he isn't "employed" he works on his own time...

Ohhh, I understand now more what your concerns are. Well, it's something you're going to have to talk about together. Still, the pros/cons list might help to see which one outnumbers the other.

I'm sure you'll come to the right decision for both of yall.

Oops didn't catch this, sorry...
Yes, well I will take your practical advice and pro/ con it for sure..
It's a great place to start. =)