cap ignoring me because hes depressed?

So he has done this before where he didn't initiate contact for 2 months and told me that he was depressed because he was broke and was trying to earn enough money in his career and become successful 2 months later he started initiating contact for about a month now again he has started ignoring me for a month cause he's depressed and again because of his job.But the thing I don't understand is why can he interact with his friends and not me?he's really bad with emotionally expressing himself and I'm thinking cause he might feel pressure from me and not his friends,could that be the case?it just hurts to see him having enough time to respond to his friends Facebook posts but not having enough time to just ask how I am....and I'm tired of initiating contact, I don't wanna look needy or clingy,I want him to come to me on his time,would that be the right thing to do?just wait for him?cause he already knows how much I love him I've said it and proved it tons of times and he never did😢the last thing I wrote to him was that I guess you dont wanna talk to me anymore and all he said back was no I'm just busy,haven't heard from him since 😢

I think he's giving you a bullshit excuse. He's just not interested. Depressed or not. Job or not. Bottomline is: If he were into you, he wouldn't ignore you for a month. Just walk away.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to be so blunt, but I'm just calling it like I see it.

Sorry to say but I don't think he is interested in u

Well the problem is he can't commit to me right now cause we're long distance and he knows I want a relationship but at the same time he doesn't want me to move on so I don't really know where I stand because he doesn't want me to come too close but also doesn't want me to leave😢

If he is as stubborn as I am, long distance wouldn't stop him from being with the right person, I did that once and we made it work for 1,5 years

Posted by Langvad
If he is as stubborn as I am, long distance wouldn't stop him from being with the right person, I did that once and we made it work for 1,5 years

Yea he is is stubborn.He has commitment issues so its hard for him to get close.He opened up a few months ago and told me about his problem that he distances himself when he starts to feel things

Posted by HappyEndGirl
Well the problem is he can't commit to me right now cause we're long distance and he knows I want a relationship but at the same time he doesn't want me to move on so I don't really know where I stand because he doesn't want me to come too close but also doesn't want me to leave😢

Why is it his decision? Don't stay in limbo. Do what's best for you. It's your decision to move on or not.

You've essentially done what so many women do, they think/feel if they tell a man how much she is into him, love him, want him and prove it the man will just fall in line with loving her back. NO! Love does not work like that for a Capricorn male nor any man for that matter.

My suggestion would be to FALL BACK--ALLLLL THE WAY BACK. Do nothing, don't lift a finger and to hide his profile on Facebook including other social networks, get off the computer for 3 months and he'll seek you out.

Your main problem is you did ALL of the work, you did all of the proving and confessing and he did none of that in return so the inevitable outcome is you're standing out there ALONE in love all by yourself. Why? You were the only one DOING the things that create a strong attachment to another person whilst he did nothing and the outcome of him doing nothing is ZERO emotional attachment to you.

Your mistake was allowing him to skirt by and do nothing while you did all the relationship work and now your by yourself and that's exactly what YOUR BEHAVIOR will lead to, it leads to being in love alone.

Also you don't seem to be listening to when he GOES AWAY and that's a big problem because you are now stuck in this commitmentphobic mans web of UNAVAILABILITY and you're ENABLING the behavior to continue and cycle in and cycle out of your life when you allow him come back and to leave with his bullshit excuses.

Don't hold so much importance on him coming back, pay more attention to his going out and staying out until it's convenient for him to come back.

Your mistake is thinking/believing he's back to stay when really he's just checking back on his TERRITORY--YOU to see if another male has pissed on his tree, he doesn't sniff out another male scent then there is no imminent threat to his territory, no one has stole his chew toy so off he goes back out to play with someone else.

You need to consider too, that maybe he was seeing other people during that 2-month period, or 1-month period, then it didn't work out. So in between the other women, he comes back to you because he knows you're an option. You've proven to him that you'll take him back and you're okay with the back and forth. You could be his in-between girl, the fall back girl.

Just saying.

Honey, don't be naive. Go live your life and don't settle for less than you deserve!!!!

Tiki is right, ya know!

You're a sweet lady. No doubt about that. We're being honest with you because we care.

Guys thank you so so so soooooooooo much for the advice.Tiki,trucap I love you guys!!!!The problem is I'm afraid to back away.I'm afraid he'll think I found someone.I get all anxious when I feel like he thinks other guys are interested in me so I keep proving to him that no one is interested and I'm interested in no one.He has low self esteem and I feel like I have to keep loving that he's good enough.But throughout all of this,he hasn't proved anything to me😢I also read that caps ddon't chase, you have to chase them.is that true?

Posted by Sagtastic1

Posted by tiki33
Also you don't seem to be listening to when he GOES AWAY and that's a big problem because you are now stuck in this commitmentphobic mans web of UNAVAILABILITY and you're ENABLING the behavior to continue and cycle in and cycle out of your life when you allow him come back and to leave with his bullshit excuses.

Don't hold so much importance on him coming back, pay more attention to his going out and staying out until it's convenient for him to come back.

Your mistake is thinking/believing he's back to stay when really he's just checking back on his TERRITORY--YOU to see if another male has pissed on his tree, he doesn't sniff out another male scent then there is no imminent threat to his territory, no one has stole his chew toy so off he goes back out to play with someone else.

Please read this about 20x. This is EXACTLY what's happening!!! I understand both sides of this situation granted I am not a Sun Capricorn, I have a Capricorn stellium. (Moon, Venus, Jupiter, & Neptune)

I broke up with my boyfriend because I was jobless due to a contract falling through. I got very depressed myself and couldn't take the "responsibility" of being there for someone else. We split, I focused on myself and within a month I found even better job making almost double the pay. Now that I have that taken care of, I feel more at ease being in a relationship.

Now coming from the female perspective, I've had my share of guys act the same way. The moment they see me looking good or have the interest of another man they come a running back. 2 of them are doing it right now! I play stupid as if I don't know what's going on, but in the back of my head I am laughing at their sorry asses.

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Aww sagtasticric thanks for that!!!!!but when you back away do you come back on your own or do you wait for them to initiate first??

Posted by HappyEndGirl
Guys thank you so so so soooooooooo much for the advice.Tiki,trucap I love you guys!!!!The problem is I'm afraid to back away.I'm afraid he'll think I found someone.I get all anxious when I feel like he thinks other guys are interested in me so I keep proving to him that no one is interested and I'm interested in no one.He has low self esteem and I feel like I have to keep loving that he's good enough.But throughout all of this,he hasn't proved anything to me😢I also read that caps ddon't chase, you have to chase them.is that true?

So what if he thinks another guy is interested in you! It's good for him. Maybe he'll step up and stop acting like this. Don't let fear take over your actions!!!!! When you let the fear take over, you become desparate to hang on to him. That, my dear, is not an attractive state. Stop proving to him no one isn't interested. Give him incentive to come after you.

Cap men will chase. We don't play games. See, we want something that makes us put out effort to get. Something worth working for. You're not making him work for it. We want to earn what we have because we value it so much more. If someone hands you $ 1000 for nothing, you're just going to blow it and have fun with it, but if you have to work really hard physical labor for that $ 1000 you will save it or spend it wisely.

Still, I think you're wasting your time on this guy. Quit worrying about him and find another guy that is actually interested in YOU.

Your fear reeks of desperation and this is how you have kept yourself captive to a man that's barely in your life.

What is your worth? Do you know your own worth?

If you believe that losing him is more important than losing YOU then you have your priorities all ass backwards.

Put yourself love yourself MORE than you love any one man because the moment a man see you NOT LOVING yourself and in turn loving him more..HE'S GONE

Why is he gone? No one man is going to be responsible for your happiness. Hell if you're lonely and miserable why in the hell would he want to stay around you.

Hold your head up high, pull your shoulders back and force yourself to get out there and flirt and date and let the Cap be a depressed absent asshole, not your problem.

LOL@Caps don't chase. that's a lie, they chase INITIALLY and if for some reason he loses interest he will just drop out of her life, he may come back to see if your still available (ego thing) but then he's GONE again. Some of them chase her hard and fast and dump her fast. If he's going to stay he's not going to drop her ever.

You are a sure deal, you are not a lover, you're like his mother, always affirming he's your special boy and what do boys do when they are done getting affirmation from momma, they run off and play with there friends, with someone other woman.

Girl drop that mothering bullshit, stop worrying about his lame ass fake ass depressions, next time tell him your depressed too and watch him diminish what you said because it's ALL ABOUT HIM HIM HIM.

Mirror and he won't comfort you or even care. Who needs that kind of man? A selfish self absorbed assclown.

CHALLENGE HIM, stop being so damn easy to get, that will get you left and dropped real fast. Your behavior is so low energetically, wimpy and easy, no man will stick with that kind of woman but what he will do is run all over her, mindfuck her b/c it's fun and wipe his feet on her back.

Awwww. So are you! Seems we think a lot alike.

lol @ drunk dialing!

I can see it now. "Oops!!! Did I accidentally call you? I'm so sorry...What's that?...Oh, I'm doing good, how you been....yeah, I'd love to meet and catch up sometime...okay, Friday is good..." and continues on from there.

++1 Truecap & Sagtastic