Cap men and fwb relationships
This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by ursorad on Sunday, March 18, 2012 and has 4 replies.
Hi guys! I need some advise... My best friend and her boyfriend (with whom I'm also close too) introduced me to the boyfriends bestfriend. We hit it off immediately. He's quite the player and was blunt about wanting a fwb arragement. Being incredibly attracted to him physically and in a dry spell lol, I agreed.
Now I've been in a situation like this before. I've been told by every guy I've dated that I'm not "girlfriend material" because it seems that I don't care. Not entirely true but, I digress.
It's been a month or so and we meet often. We also talk a lot more than what is considered "normal" for fwb. We get pretty deep like talking about family, aspirations, childhood, etc. I get tons of eye contact from him and even catch his eye in group conversations...
As of 2 days ago, the boyfriend sensed that I may be getting attached and warned him so now his messages are short and direct.
He continuously tells me how I'm "going to make ur future husband really happy one day." and has mentioned twice that I caught him off the rebound... I'm sure he noticed our unconventional closeness long ago but decided to only act after being told.
Also, did I mention, the boyfriend doent want us to hook up? Yes, the fwb agreed along with the boyfriend to seperate from me after a blow out we all had but the fwb continued to speak to me without the knowledge of the boyfriend.
I would like to have a relationship and I must admit I'm rather fond of him but I'm also quite capable of walking away. I have needs lol but I would like to know if he sees me as potential or strictly as fwb??
Btw his birthday is jan 12, 1984 and mine is April 20, 1988
Now I've been in a situation like this before. I've been told by every guy I've dated that I'm not "girlfriend material" because it seems that I don't care. Not entirely true but, I digress.
It's been a month or so and we meet often. We also talk a lot more than what is considered "normal" for fwb. We get pretty deep like talking about family, aspirations, childhood, etc. I get tons of eye contact from him and even catch his eye in group conversations...
As of 2 days ago, the boyfriend sensed that I may be getting attached and warned him so now his messages are short and direct.
He continuously tells me how I'm "going to make ur future husband really happy one day." and has mentioned twice that I caught him off the rebound... I'm sure he noticed our unconventional closeness long ago but decided to only act after being told.
Also, did I mention, the boyfriend doent want us to hook up? Yes, the fwb agreed along with the boyfriend to seperate from me after a blow out we all had but the fwb continued to speak to me without the knowledge of the boyfriend.
I would like to have a relationship and I must admit I'm rather fond of him but I'm also quite capable of walking away. I have needs lol but I would like to know if he sees me as potential or strictly as fwb??
Btw his birthday is jan 12, 1984 and mine is April 20, 1988
What's there to discuss if you already knew "the terms" to begin with? "Friends with Benefits" or "Fking WITHOUT Bonding"..all that deep convo is already crossing the lines and weaving a web of emotions that may entangle you. FWB arrangements aren't for the faint of heart, someone always ends up catching feelings.. You say you have needs, handle them and keep your feelings "out of sight, and out of mind." Otherwise you might need to cut things off altogether..What I don't like is the 3rd party interference. (the Boyfriend) after introducing you to his friend, he should just step away and let you two handle things the way YOU two would like. You're both grown individuals I don't see why he feels the need to "chaperone." He needs to mind his business AND take care of his OWN girlfriend.
He made it quite clear. He only wants to get in your pants.
Taurusbelle:
Good point lol the boyfriend actually stepped back bc of our blowout and doesn't speak to either of us together or seperatly on our arrangement lol...
I realize that the closeness is crossing the line immensely but I keep a level head only bc I automatically assume that any guy I'm with like this is being manipulative (be it true or not).
He's told me about his "3-month theory" where basically a FWB relationship can and has led him into a real relationship... I am by no means counting on it but if I hold potentional with him then i feel that it would be worth it to stick around for a bit. On the other hand, I'm contiplating backing out entirely. Having his bestfriend and my bestfriend in a relationship means we will undoubtably see each other... Apparently, I'm one of the best he's ever had haha and hes stated a few times that he thinks the only reason he thinks we'll "break-up" is when I get tired of him lol.
I guess my question is if I cut off the physical aspects, are there any chances that he could see as dating potential or will I always just be "a great lay" hahaha
Good point lol the boyfriend actually stepped back bc of our blowout and doesn't speak to either of us together or seperatly on our arrangement lol...
I realize that the closeness is crossing the line immensely but I keep a level head only bc I automatically assume that any guy I'm with like this is being manipulative (be it true or not).
He's told me about his "3-month theory" where basically a FWB relationship can and has led him into a real relationship... I am by no means counting on it but if I hold potentional with him then i feel that it would be worth it to stick around for a bit. On the other hand, I'm contiplating backing out entirely. Having his bestfriend and my bestfriend in a relationship means we will undoubtably see each other... Apparently, I'm one of the best he's ever had haha and hes stated a few times that he thinks the only reason he thinks we'll "break-up" is when I get tired of him lol.
I guess my question is if I cut off the physical aspects, are there any chances that he could see as dating potential or will I always just be "a great lay" hahaha
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