Hello everyone. I'm new here and could really use some advice..
Long story short, I'm a cancer who has been with a Capricorn man for nearly 7 years now. I love this man with all of my heart... He has talked about the future with me and how happy he is many times.. he has even talked about marriage with me before....and as far as I knew things between us were really great..
Then he broke up with me suddenly on valentines day, after giving me flowers, a card, and wanting to take me on a date. He said that even though he was planning to break up with me earlier, he still wanted me to have a good valentines day before he did it.....?
He has told me that the main reason he left me is because he is in love with his female best friend (who happens to be a Libra/Virgo cusp) and that she has "feelings for him too" ...
But he has been telling me that he doesn't want to date anyone at all right now until he "finds himself" and "figures things out" he says that he loves me and her both equally... and that she apparently told him that they are a "perfect match" but that she doesn't want to date him right now because she "doesn't know what she wants out of a relationship and isnt ready." She's also casually dating others while he waits on her for an answer. He also told me that he "loves me very much, and finds me wildly attractive..? and doesn't want to lose me from his life....." He says that there is "a good chance" for me and him to work on things together..... but that he isn't sure yet..
Then he tells me that he can't decide between either of us... or if he should just be single because of all the pain he put "himself" and me through....? He has told me that he still wants to be my friend no matter what he picks but I told him I that I can't do the "just friends" thing because I love him too much....and wanted to spend my life with him..... I've also told him that if he starts dating her then he closes the door on "us" ... because I won't be a backup or 2nd choice if that's what hes going to do.....
I just don't know what to make of all this.....
I love this man more than anything.... and it's hard to go through this when we had so many talks about our future together.. and marriage...
I want to believe that he really does still care for me...... but I'm really thinking that I'm just back up at this point... or that he just wants to let me down gently....by giving me any kind of hope that its not over.....
How can he walk away from 7 years so easily? He was talking about love and the future.. up until our last day together.... everything is just a complete shock to me.
And how well do Capricorns and Libra / Virgo cusp get along?
He has told me that he is sorry multiple times and that he still loves me and is attracted to me....I just don't know what to make of all this....?
In my heart I still want to be with him.... but I'm starting to feel like I might be dreaming big.... ..
Him: Venus Scorpio Me: VenusLeo
Signed Up:
Jan 25, 2012Comments: 8 · Posts: 20090 · Topics: 685
If I'm not #1, I'm not interested. Not going to be someone's 2nd choice.
7 years is plenty of time for him to know how he feels about you. If I were in your shoes, I'd make the decision for him.
Signed Up:
Feb 04, 2016Comments: 9 · Posts: 3545 · Topics: 254
Sounds verrrrrry close to home lol. I am just Libra not cusp but I attract Caps ALOT. My ex was Cap-I couldnt be with him in a serious relationship because he wanted to marry and was crazy controlling and not someone I could imagine ever spending the rest of my life with. Now he did move on, but he cannot stay away from me. There is a major sexual compatibility between us. But when things get real we just cannot handle each other. Maybe these 2 have been flirting for a while and prob dont know each others darker side yet.
The only (possible) good thing is that he has been very honest with you-and im sure you know what to do deep down. Follow your heart.
And id be weary of men who "talk about marriage and the future" without following through. My Cappy was intent on marriage and wanted me to meet his parents. You should watch actions with Cappys-they themself believe actions speak louder than words and generally dont talk without providing or until they are serious about following through with it.
Im actually beginning to think they use shock tactics and brutal honesty more to their advantage. Its difficult to move on when its put forth to you in this way and when/if you do move on they will become crazy mad at you for "abandoning" them. They have extremely high expectations from a partner that they themselves possibly could never meet.
Focus, think and remind yourself why you are sticking by your decision daily and you will get there with or without him.
Good luck and im sorry for what you're going through