Capricorn Issues?

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by truecap on Wednesday, April 30, 2014 and has 39 replies.
Do you agree with this?

So if that ^^ is true, does it mean that this is true?

Alas, if we don't learn that ^^ lesson, are we doomed for this?

What are the pics? I can't see them.
"Capricorns generally want to be loved and appreciated; but they may have a hard time letting someone know they feel this way"
"As a capricorn you must learn to communicate your deep feelings"
"In love, a capricorn may choose to stay lonely instead of risking vulnerability".
Do you agree with this?
"Capricorns generally want to be loved and appreciated, but they may have a hard time letting anyone know that they feel this way."

So if that ^^ is true, does it mean that this is true?
"As a Capricorn, you must learn to openly communicate your deep feelings."

Alas, if we don't learn that ^^ lesson, are we doomed for this?
"In love a Capricorn may choose to stay lonely instead of risking vulnerability."
questions like these make me thankful for my appreciation of vulnerability.
Common hurdles we all must face.
Trust in others and the comfort to show weakness are luxuries Capricorns rarely themselves to have.
Well. I do kinda agree with having hard time telling people how I feel. But to openly communicate, that's moving a little too fast. As much as I'd want to. I'd wait till it's appropriate to do so. And for the last- I kinda like being single. Makes me feel a bit more free to move and open to newer stuff as I explore. But I'm happier when I'm not dealing with drama and happier when someone isn't in bed with me cuz I;m kind of a bed hog.
It sounds like trust is all of our capricorn problems.
Asked my Cap for ya if this is true of him, he said "yeah kinda...(suspicious/wondering face emoticon)".
"Trust in others and the comfort to show weakness are luxuries Capricorns rarely themselves to have."
+1
The problem with Capricorn is not trust, it is their tendency to feel that they are superior than others. If you feel superior than others, would you rely or trust on others? They have tendency to be super controlling and look down on other people. Now, I can't speak for the female Capricorns, just experience the male ones, one of them is my brother. But unless caps born rich, they will have problems committing to a marriage. They want everything to be perfect before they commit to marriage. Getting into the relationship is easy for them but to commit is not because once in a relationship the caps will see the imperfections of their partners. Unless their partners can convince them that such imperfection is reasonable or the partner is willing to work toward fixing that imperfection to make it perfect, the caps won't commit.
If you have relationship with a Capricorn, always be the prize worth winning for your Caps.
But but the problem is... Caps aren't above imperfections, trustworthiness, and they have their agenda when it comes to intentions.
Posted by StillWater
IDK. Some people sure find us worthy. When I commit to someone whether its a friend, s/o, or family member, they see the difference in the quality I provide. Even after I move on from them, I know I can come back and they'll welcome me with open arms because what I gave them was that good.
But, I'm trying to find someone who gives me something just as good as I am willing to give them, and that is hard to find.
We know the worth of others and the worth of ourselves, if those two don't match up there's no reason to stay.



If you give as much as you expect, it makes sense. Most people function that way or they should anyway.
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?
Posted by VirgoDragirl
The problem with Capricorn is not trust, it is their tendency to feel that they are superior than others. If you feel superior than others, would you rely or trust on others? They have tendency to be super controlling and look down on other people. Now, I can't speak for the female Capricorns, just experience the male ones, one of them is my brother. But unless caps born rich, they will have problems committing to a marriage. They want everything to be perfect before they commit to marriage. Getting into the relationship is easy for them but to commit is not because once in a relationship the caps will see the imperfections of their partners. Unless their partners can convince them that such imperfection is reasonable or the partner is willing to work toward fixing that imperfection to make it perfect, the caps won't commit.
If you have relationship with a Capricorn, always be the prize worth winning for your Caps.


I don't agree with those parts of what you said.
To take what you say here "unless a cap is born rich, they have problems committing". Utter bullarky.
There are LOTS of poor caps who are in committed relationships.
And you say a cap won't commit if there are imperfections in their partner, unless the partner is willing to change. Again, utter bull. Caps are realistic and we see the imperfections in our partners. The issue is not whether the partner is willing to change, but whether the cap can live with and accept the partners imperfections. Caps realize that people aren't perfect and we realize that people don't change. Thus, if we can't accept that imperfection and no matter how much effort that person makes, we know that person isn't going to change, then the delimna is can we live with said imperfections. Lots of times, yes. Sometimes no.
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?




Afraid of being hurt or rejected?
Posted by StillWater
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?




Afraid of being hurt or rejected?


See, I wouldn't admit to this even if it was true.
click to expand


WTH, I'll admit to it. Yes, it is a very scary thing to open up and take the risk of being rejected. However, I'm trying to learn that opening up only makes relationships stronger.
But, yes, creepy is still right, too. I'd never let that person know the fear.
Posted by truecap
Posted by VirgoDragirl
The problem with Capricorn is not trust, it is their tendency to feel that they are superior than others. If you feel superior than others, would you rely or trust on others? They have tendency to be super controlling and look down on other people. Now, I can't speak for the female Capricorns, just experience the male ones, one of them is my brother. But unless caps born rich, they will have problems committing to a marriage. They want everything to be perfect before they commit to marriage. Getting into the relationship is easy for them but to commit is not because once in a relationship the caps will see the imperfections of their partners. Unless their partners can convince them that such imperfection is reasonable or the partner is willing to work toward fixing that imperfection to make it perfect, the caps won't commit.
If you have relationship with a Capricorn, always be the prize worth winning for your Caps.


I don't agree with those parts of what you said.
To take what you say here "unless a cap is born rich, they have problems committing". Utter bullarky.
There are LOTS of poor caps who are in committed relationships.

And you say a cap won't commit if there are imperfections in their partner, unless the partner is willing to change. Again, utter bull. Caps are realistic and we see the imperfections in our partners. The issue is not whether the partner is willing to change, but whether the cap can live with and accept the partners imperfections. Caps realize that people aren't perfect and we realize that people don't change. Thus, if we can't accept that imperfection and no matter how much effort that person makes, we know that person isn't going to change, then the delimna is can we live with said imperfections. Lots of times, yes. Sometimes no.
click to expand


this is a very good and smart post.
Lol!!!
I was talking about it in a relationship sense.
Then again, maybe I'm just not as smart as you, since I did. smile
Posted by StillWater
The user who posted this message has hidden it.


this was a good post. why did you hide it?
click to expand



cuz I posted the same thing twice...
Posted by StillWater
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?




Afraid of being hurt or rejected?


See, I wouldn't admit to this even if it was true.
click to expand



OK SW, problem is everyone, EVERYONE is afraid of being hurt or rejected. It's not a huge revelation. Just like we all want to be loved or connect with another person. I don't know why everyone is so afraid of the obvious.
Posted by truecap
Posted by StillWater
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?




Afraid of being hurt or rejected?


See, I wouldn't admit to this even if it was true.


WTH, I'll admit to it. Yes, it is a very scary thing to open up and take the risk of being rejected. However, I'm trying to learn that opening up only makes relationships stronger.
But, yes, creepy is still right, too. I'd never let that person know the fear.
click to expand



Opening up means letting the other person in. Without any risks, where would one be?
Posted by DonumDei
Posted by aquapiscescusp
I don't know why everyone is so afraid of the obvious.



Goodness gracious,APC, you took the words out of my mouth! smile
click to expand



Big Grin we're so in tune
Posted by StillWater
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Posted by StillWater
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?




Afraid of being hurt or rejected?


See, I wouldn't admit to this even if it was true.



OK SW, problem is everyone, EVERYONE is afraid of being hurt or rejected. It's not a huge revelation. Just like we all want to be loved or connect with another person. I don't know why everyone is so afraid of the obvious.



I don't know. It's complicated.
click to expand



I do understand though. I am like that to a certain extent. As I get older I realize if I don't open up more, share more, I can't let anyone in. It's that simple. Baby steps.
I've never had good experiences opening up.
I tried just yesterday. I've been sitting on something that's been bothering me for a week now. I opened up to my friend about it, letting him know I was upset and why, and although he apologized, I was left feeling extremely petty. I'm not sure he fully understood the reason I was upset because I never really did get out how it made me "feel." I'm actually still confused about why it affected me so much.
To be honest, although I am sensitive and a bit emotional, I don't think I understand the depths of me own emotions...not enough to explain them without feeling like I've wasted everyone's time, mine included. It never fails. I end up feeling like a retard and the person is looking at me like "your upset about THAT?" so...
I don't think it's worth it for me personally, to open up, at-least not yet.
Posted by DonumDei
This thread reminds me of the one with a similar theme on Pisces board inquiring about Pisces preference(s) between "strength vs/or vulnerability". In truth, to me, true strength cannot exist without vulnerability, just as little can there be light without darkness, keeping in mind, this philosophy/approach is primarily addressing relationship dynamics.
Sometimes the inability to allow oneself to express it may stem from the environment we were raised n such a family nucleus, just as much as the social conditioning on a greater scale thus the conditioned fear of being misperceived as week which goes back to my initial statement in that it actually takes far greater strength/intestinal fortitude to not only invite trust into the relationship, but also honesty and transparency amongst myriad of other factors.
Baring in mind that we all operate on a different timeline, to demand other parties compliance when they are not ready is not only selfish but also exercise in futility. One should not, however, forget that relationships, healthy relationships, are not battlegrounds, instead, intended to be nurturing environment where your S/O is your ally and not a foe.




I like this x
Posted by lnana04
I've never had good experiences opening up.
I tried just yesterday. I've been sitting on something that's been bothering me for a week now. I opened up to my friend about it, letting him know I was upset and why, and although he apologized, I was left feeling extremely petty. I'm not sure he fully understood the reason I was upset because I never really did get out how it made me "feel." I'm actually still confused about why it affected me so much.
To be honest, although I am sensitive and a bit emotional, I don't think I understand the depths of me own emotions...not enough to explain them without feeling like I've wasted everyone's time, mine included. It never fails. I end up feeling like a retard and the person is looking at me like "your upset about THAT?" so...
I don't think it's worth it for me personally, to open up, at-least not yet.



Opening up is like taking a stand --in a way. It doesn't matter what the other thinks about you doing it...
that's who you are, how you feel, it can't be wrong
and if it is... then you are not meant to be around that person
problem solved
i've definitely been this before... scared frozen from saying how i feel. it reminds me of the movie Liar Liar??_ just like Jim Carrey in that movie only you can't say how you feel. and the struggle is a bit less visible lol.
But I've always found that I was unable to say how I feel only towards those I couldn't trust because of their own behavior towards me.
Different story if I do trust someone and really want to build trust with that person.
Some people just allow you to feel confident in your feelings and others make your feelings wither away and die.
i eventually became sick and tired of feeling as though other people had so much control over how i felt and how i handled my feelings. it's unbelievably cathartic when you allow your feelings to get out and be heard. yes it leaves you vulnerable to reaction, but that's the point. you'll never be able to experience all the special nuances of a romantic relationship if you're too afraid to show what you have to give.
and when you say how you feel, when you put it on the table, your feelings and you then have that much more integrity and you start to feel more true to yourself??_ and more "in control." especially when you realize that your feelings don't have to be dependent on another person's reaction or emotional response. this can even be empowering.
not to mention??_ all of this ^^^ is apparent to the person on the receiving end. capricorns don't lack in sincerity when in love. i think our love tends to leave a deep impression whether it ends happily or not.
I think you're right, creepy.
My problem is when I try to express the deep feelings, somehow it comes out at about half of what I'm actually feeling and I tend to speak in a lighter less serious tone than I'm feeling. Not always. But sometimes and especially when I'm not feeling confident about how those feelings are going to be taken.
Something I need to work on. Like they say, awareness solves 90% of the problem. smile
Posted by Caplove
Posted by truecap
"Capricorns generally want to be loved and appreciated; but they may have a hard time letting someone know they feel this way"
"As a capricorn you must learn to communicate your deep feelings"
"In love, a capricorn may choose to stay lonely instead of risking vulnerability".


Yes, it's hard to let people know these things although I'm slowly learning that people can't read my mind and I need to verbally communicate my needs better and stop being so embarrassed about them.
I sometimes think that things are very obvious to others (a partner, for example) and that I'm subtlety telling them with my body language or through my eyes (but I fail miserably at this). And then when things don't go my way I get so upset and shut down or go cold because I feel they should just KNOW. LOL.
I really don't know what I'm so embarrassed about either. I think I'm afraid I'll be laughed at, criticized or that I'll be taken advantage of when I'm at my most vulnerable.

click to expand


I feel this way too sometimes, caplove.
Then I look back and think, it's my own fault I feel this way because I never expressed exactly what I wanted them to know.
Posted by truecap
I think you're right, creepy.
My problem is when I try to express the deep feelings, somehow it comes out at about half of what I'm actually feeling and I tend to speak in a lighter less serious tone than I'm feeling. Not always. But sometimes and especially when I'm not feeling confident about how those feelings are going to be taken.
Something I need to work on. Like they say, awareness solves 90% of the problem. smile


Yes! It's what happened to me yesterday. By the time I got in front of him I was smiles and giggles, when a few days ago I was darn near in tears. That always happens. Im much less serious when I get it out, and it could be because I personally don't get it out as soon as it happens. I wait to absorb what I feel, then wait for a time when I'm comfortable enough to talk about it. By then, I am somewhat over it, but the way I lighten it doesn't help in that person taking my sensitivity seriously.
Posted by Caplove

Yes, it's hard to let people know these things although I'm slowly learning that people can't read my mind and I need to verbally communicate my needs better and stop being so embarrassed about them.
I sometimes think that things are very obvious to others (a partner, for example) and that I'm subtlety telling them with my body language or through my eyes (but I fail miserably at this). And then when things don't go my way I get so upset and shut down or go cold because I feel they should just KNOW. LOL.
I really don't know what I'm so embarrassed about either. I think I'm afraid I'll be laughed at, criticized or that I'll be taken advantage of when I'm at my most vulnerable.



Big thumbs up to you for your courage attempting to make positive changes in yourself that will hopefully help people better understand you.
Posted by lnana04
I've never had good experiences opening up.
I tried just yesterday. I've been sitting on something that's been bothering me for a week now. I opened up to my friend about it, letting him know I was upset and why, and although he apologized, I was left feeling extremely petty. I'm not sure he fully understood the reason I was upset because I never really did get out how it made me "feel." I'm actually still confused about why it affected me so much.
To be honest, although I am sensitive and a bit emotional, I don't think I understand the depths of me own emotions...not enough to explain them without feeling like I've wasted everyone's time, mine included. It never fails. I end up feeling like a retard and the person is looking at me like "your upset about THAT?" so...
I don't think it's worth it for me personally, to open up, at-least not yet.


I find this post interesting but also touching. Interesting because I think many times what makes it hard to open up is not understanding one's own feelings well enough to express them. Touching because you may feel like a "retard" for being upset about something but it's doubtful that you're actually perceived that way by the person on the receiving end, especially if that person is someone close and knows you well.
Posted by lnana04
Posted by truecap
I think you're right, creepy.
My problem is when I try to express the deep feelings, somehow it comes out at about half of what I'm actually feeling and I tend to speak in a lighter less serious tone than I'm feeling. Not always. But sometimes and especially when I'm not feeling confident about how those feelings are going to be taken.
Something I need to work on. Like they say, awareness solves 90% of the problem. smile


Yes! It's what happened to me yesterday. By the time I got in front of him I was smiles and giggles, when a few days ago I was darn near in tears. That always happens. Im much less serious when I get it out, and it could be because I personally don't get it out as soon as it happens. I wait to absorb what I feel, then wait for a time when I'm comfortable enough to talk about it. By then, I am somewhat over it, but the way I lighten it doesn't help in that person taking my sensitivity seriously.
click to expand


I have found I do a better job through the written word, like text. But that sucks!!! I get my point across better but I can't judge the recipient's reaction - who knows maybe that part makes it easier. But text can so easily get misconstrued.
Posted by lnana04
Posted by truecap
I think you're right, creepy.
My problem is when I try to express the deep feelings, somehow it comes out at about half of what I'm actually feeling and I tend to speak in a lighter less serious tone than I'm feeling. Not always. But sometimes and especially when I'm not feeling confident about how those feelings are going to be taken.
Something I need to work on. Like they say, awareness solves 90% of the problem. smile


Yes! It's what happened to me yesterday. By the time I got in front of him I was smiles and giggles, when a few days ago I was darn near in tears. That always happens. Im much less serious when I get it out, and it could be because I personally don't get it out as soon as it happens. I wait to absorb what I feel, then wait for a time when I'm comfortable enough to talk about it. By then, I am somewhat over it, but the way I lighten it doesn't help in that person taking my sensitivity seriously.
click to expand


And yes, you described it better than I did. I do the same.
Posted by DonumDei
Posted by aquapiscescusp
Big Grin we're so in tune


*chuckles*
Hi5 to that! Big Grin
click to expand



Hi5 to you sista Winking
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?



Because your capricorn feelings run deeply. Dont forget you are half fish/half goat, you capricorn seem to be always in between, when earthquake comes all seems to shake, many times irreversible, and your heart knows that because past experiences.
This post has intrigued me.
My capricorn never opens up to me, and sometimes he does expect me to just know things. I've called him out on it before, in a polite manner, of course. He didn't really say much, but I hope he listened and soaked it in for the future.
As far as opening up his feelings, he has only genuinely opened up to me once.
We had gotten into an argument, and I was contemplating a break up. (I am not one to threaten break ups because I know how damaging that can be to a relationship.) but we really were not getting along often at this point.
Once I said the words, everything did a 180. I never had seen him cry before, and he said things I had never heard him say to me before. (You're the one I want, I don't want anyone else, I want to marry you, etc.) It made me love him MORE. I did not find this weak, at all. I can't imagine how hard it was for him to put himself out there like that, but it strengthened us.
We obviously worked it out. That was over one year ago. Now I just patiently wait for him to open up to me again. We are due. Tongue
Posted by truecap
Why is it so hard for us to communicate deep feelings openly?



I have Capricorn Ascendant & my friends have capricorn sun...It's that Capricorn are ruled by the planet Saturn which is slow, restrict emotions...They are slow in opening up there emotions & they can open up only when they feel comfortable with some person or when either they are comfortable with people
who understand them without a words ..
Well, I think that doesn't go for all Caps. I'm seeing one who has no problems with showing and talking about his deep feelings . He hasn't said "I love you" ( which To me isnt the most important thing to literally say) but expressing and acting upon it.. Yes! Definately

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