Help! Confused with my male Capricorn..

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by vir22 on Thursday, September 12, 2013 and has 21 replies.
I need help understanding the things that he does. Do I still have a chance with him?
This once particular Capricorn pursued me for 5 months straight and we ended up kissing after he opened up to me about his past and WOW was it loving. He used to sit next to me everyday, offer me his jacket, help on work, caress my fingers discreetly, and constantly text me. The ironic part is the fact that he's an awkward and shy person that actually openly pursued me. My friends thought he liked me. So anyway after a month after the kiss, he and I almost had awkward sex. That night ended with me calling him and him texting me about our relationship and he suggested fwb. I asked him if there was anything more and he said he's not sure if he wants one right now.
I just couldnt understand why after pursuing me for so long. I have three theories.. 1) Because he's going to the military in a year and he's working hard to be in shape for the military and doesnt have the capacity to be in a relationship 2) because he only wanted sex 3) because he just liked the chase. He really made it seem like he really liked me, and afterwards we kept on talking and kept friendly. He still did sit next to me everyday all throughout.
Eventually a month later I told him I like him, he didnt respond. 2 days afterwards he tried to talk to me and I pushed him away feeling embarassed. Eventually we became very distant, we barely talked but for some reason I would always see him watching or observing me from a distance. One day I decided to spontaneously say Hi to him and he blushed immensely.
This continued for 1 month and by the end I was over thinking everything, afraid of talking to him I just pretended that I didnt like him. Later I gave him a letter stating how I just dont want to lose him, how I hate how we're awkward, how I miss his amazing hugs and what not.
It's been 2 months since then. I tried hard to move on and get over him. I thought I had, but the second I saw him four days ago.. everything came rushing back to me. When we saw each other, we had this moment where we just paused and looked at each other. He's in two of my classes and I havent said hi, I havent smiled at him, I havent done anything.
I just dont get how he could pursue me for 5 months and then after I push him away, he just watches me. I understand that he's never been one to use words but rather actions.
I really miss him, I still care about him. I just can't help but to protect my self from getting hurt.
I dont want our mutual friends to have to go back and forth between us just because we're acting this way.
Do I have a chance with him still? I've heard that capricorns are all about one strike and youre out.
I feel delusional for thinking that him looking over at me multiple times means that I might still have a shot at making things work out.
Please tell me what you think!
Ah,iam in your shoes too,i dont know what advice to give to you-).Iam also a Virgo(older then you,iam sure,but with a lot of questions-).
I know they are all about testing and seeing how do you react and fit in their life plan.
My opinion is -they have a life plan,everything is like a piece of puzzle which needs to be put in a place(work, all kind of relationships,love).
My cap said me once he wants to make me look like a ballerina( i was like -what??i didnt know where that comes from,he never said to me is such a good dancer,i discovered by myself,so probably he reffered at dancing- to become as good as a ballerina).
Very pretentious type of people,but virgo are pretentious too,awkwardness i think is coming from inability to show emotions of both of this signs(shame).
If a man even has the nerve to suggest FWB, that's a big RED FLAG!!!! You like him and want a relationship with him. SO DON'T DO IT!!!!!!! You will only get hurt and have to experience the heart ache. Then you will be back on here posting on and on about this man. (Not that we don't like talking to you).
In my opinion, FWB has its place and there's nothing wrong with it if both people only want the same thing. BUT, and listen up, when a guy KNOWS you like him and suggests only a FWB relationship, he only wants to use you and it shows he has no respect for you, otherwise he would be actively pursuing you and wanting a relationship with you. If he really liked you, he wouldn't be interested in be able to see other people and couldn't stand the thought of you seeing someone else.
Save yourself the misery, be his friend, but tell him no to the benefits. If you don't respect yourself, how will he ever respect you.
Now in answer to your question, if you show little respect for yourself by accepting his request, NO you have no chance with him. It shows you're a push over and he can get what he wants without putting out any efforts. A cap man wants a strong woman who will challenge him. He wants to earn what he gets. He will value you more if he has to work for it.
Shut up guys! It's the truth and you know it.


I think I focused on only one part of that. I see now that you didn't accept.
You've tried. You told him what you feel. The ball is in his court and if he doesn't toss it back to you, then please, please, please stop trying!!!!
If he like you, he would let you know.
Posted by capinc
Maybe you're just not girlfriend material.


LOL @ capinc.
just the avi made me LOL cause...um that's the other person right?
mmmmeh never mind.
Posted by champranger
Posted by truecap
I think I focused on only one part of that. I see now that you didn't accept.
You've tried. You told him what you feel. The ball is in his court and if he doesn't toss it back to you, then please, please, please stop trying!!!!
If he like you, he would let you know.


+1
To OP, I think now that you had turned him down on FWB, he is probably reconsidering what he thinks of you. It does not necessarily mean he will end up liking you, but if you are wanting more than just FWB and stayed away from FWB, I think you will at least have his respect in the end.

click to expand


Yeah I turned him down. I said hi to him the other day, and afterwards he just hung around me. I could see him from the corner of my eye looking over at me every time I would start talking to a guy, I think he was listening to what I was saying here and there because he was 2ft away from me the entire the time and he kind of reacted to something I said. I dont understand his behavior. He never turned me down after I told him that I like him, he didnt exactly react at all, which psyched me out so I pretended like I didnt know him and he would observe me from a distance. Why does he keep on looking over...?
Those Capricorn men are so hard to figure out!I think is better not to analyze his behaviour towards you,is just an headache.
They can sense you and how you feel towards them!
I think they are quite insecure and cant deal well with emotions,but if they had like some emotions shareing at some point with a person they will try to keep eye contact with that person,even from faraway?
Iam dealing with a Cap man,also at the moment!
Yeah I definitely agree. They are hard to analyze, possibly because I'm thinking too much. I don't quite understand the whole keep eye contact concept but I guess its not meant to be understood?
Well I guess I can say that this Capricorn definitely has his hot and cold moments, but I have a feeling he's floating back.
Is it safe to say that you still have a chance when theyre acting hot and cold? I mean it must mean that theyve been thinking about it and that they havent quite moved on yet... am I right or wrong?

lol I'm still analyzing. I'm sorry it's my job as a virgal haha
capricorns are one and done type of people like he used you and is going to move on to the next one
I agree with chance15 some(not all) caps can come on strong but when they feel they got you they can sit back and relax, and be a pain in the ass! This cap seems very much like that. Caps can be very selfish and they can persue something with great endeavour and then once they get it they can become really detached too. Some are really smooth talkers too. If you dont want a fwb relationship then try forget and move on, coz he wont be worth it. Virgos, like values and respect, you should have noted that if this guy had any decency then he should have said from the begining he is looking for a fwb relationship not afterwards. I am not fwb type of person but i have to say i have more respect for those that can from the begining be honest and say thats what they want rather that lead a person on then say it afterward. And 5 months is enough time for him to have figured out what he really wants.
Posted by truecap
A cap man wants a strong woman who will challenge him. He wants to earn what he gets. He will value you more if he has to work for it.



I think some caps are like that but not all my ex husband just liked to have his way, controlling and manipulative and because he couldnt control me he couldnt handle it. He was a capricorn rising.
But overall regardless of what sign a guy/girl is everyone should have self respect and not ALLOW themselves to be treated badly! And if you have self respect then any guy will value you. And if a guy doesnt work for it then he is looking for something easy.
To be honest deciding whether he's worth sticking around is for me to decide. I know him best. Also he could have gone for any girl that was throwing them self at him, if he was looking for an easy smash. I have more than enough respect for my self.
My intuition tells me from the way he's been acting is that he still has feelings left for me. I just wanted some opinions.
The whole fwb thing is blown out of proportion. Realistically speaking if a guy was only interested in fwb and gets rejected then I think he would get over it in 2 weeks. But for some reason, it's been over 3 months and he's beginning to look over as he stretches consistently just the way he used to when pursuing me.
I honestly think I have a chance with more patience this time.
Sorry if you have been offended by anything said. your right you do know best as your in the situation. We can only comment on how you describe the situation from a outsiders point of view we can only give advice/opinions and its entirely upto you whatever you decide. All i would say is just be carefull and maybe you should just talk it out with him and see what the situation is. Goodluck.
Virgo, you're right and you know your situation and how he is. You are in the middle of it and know more what is going on and can tell more how to read it than we can. No offense here, But think about this, if you could read it, why did you ask us? If we told you what you didn't want to hear, realize we were just trying to help. You wanted honest opinions and you got them. Sometimes when we're in the middle of something we can't see all the angles or the big picture. We answered the best we could with what was given to us and tried to offer you several various angles and opinions. I don't think anyone meant to offend you.
The thing about the FWB may have gotten blown out of porportion, but it is a small glimpse of his character and capricorns are BIG on character. That's why you got the answers you did because to some of us its a warning flag to be cautious.
Anyway, I think since you turned him down for FWB (good girl!!!) and maintained a friendly front to him, then he got a glimpse into YOUR character and he likes it. He's probably stepped back and started seeing you in a different light and now may see there's more to you than he first thought and has now decided to give it a chance.
Just make him work for it!!!
Good luck!!!
@Doublecap and @truecap
I'm sorry I didnt mean to sound offended or to snap. It's just that I've been doubting my self and my intuition, and I kept on telling my self that he was only using me. I wanted a variation of different opinions, but somehow managed to get the same ones I was trying to convince my self. I'm having such a hard time understanding the facts. I know I shouldnt be reading into him too much but I do. I cant tell which perspective is the most realistic because both of them are so realistic. Theres a part of me thats trying to stay away from him and tell my self all the negative possibilities because I'm afraid of getting hurt, but when Ive talked about it to my friends they shed new light on to the whole situation and made me think positively.
I really appreciate everyones effort.
We all do what you're doing. I learned the hard way not to analyze and think too much. But ah well, that's the virgo and cap way. It's hard not to think too much, though. smile
Time will tell and you've got plenty of time.
Aw, i know it must so frustrating i do that too. But over the years i learnt to follow my own instincts because after many experiences i realised they were always right. So perhaps forget what everyone else thinks and our opinions and sit down and feel what your heart says about him being genuine or not. Deep down you will know. Not the mind but the heart.I hope that makes sense. And whatever happens if you see it as a learning curve then your always gona gain never lose.x
I cant help over thinking. This whole hot and cold thing is driving me crazy, and every time he acts cold I just tell my self that thats the reality and that I should move on. Then later he acts a lot warmer and I get hopeful that things are going to work out. This is an ongoing cycle. Is it EVER going to end?
I just can't move on. I've been trying to move on ever since the beginning. I've been trying so hard not to like him, but I do.
I'm scared that I might just be seeing what I want to see, because half of me really wants him and the other half is tempted to run the other way. So I'm trying to reason with my self for both positive and negative, trying to see the situation in all perspectives.
The biggest thing to me was when you said he opened up to you about his past. When a Capricorn opens up, that means a lot. Emotions are not something we toil with. However, When we do open to somebody it is saying a lot. We feel the connection with that person and trust them. This may sound a bit odd, but there are times when we will open up to a person we love and then find out that they we didn't get the "vibe" from them we expected. When we believe our emotions are being played with, we put up a brick wall. He may have at some point felt uncomfortable with you and his emotions. We will never leave a person until we are absolutely on the same page. We aren't to great about talking about how we feel, we just know. We can't really explain it to the outside world.
My advice would be to pursue him. Don't be needy, be kind, and most importantly DO NOT bring emotion into this. It may be hard, but the time will come when you can pour out your emotions. That time will be when he opens up emotionally. Then you know that you are safe and that he WANTS and is READY to listen to your emotions.
Hope this helped. XX
He's kind of in his shell I guess. It's hard for me because I'm in my shell too...
Is saying that I miss talking to him and I'm sorry things got weird, emotional?

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