How do you guys battle unrequited love?

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by cappiegirl on Friday, August 18, 2017 and has 41 replies.
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
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You've already tolled him your feelings?
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Thank you all for the support. Yes I told him before about my feelings, had post here few weeks ago about it and it went all wrong as he denied his feelings (even there were obvious) for whatever reason but he insisted we remain friends. I withdrew myself but he keeps reaching out ... to say hi, to comment in group chat on my activities, then this week he made a point of trying to help me with something. He is so confusing, I am trying to keep emotional distance to protect myself. It really sucks.
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Gurl you need to have backup on backup on backup. Get you a rebound, and a rebound for your rebound. It's not complicated.
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@whorpio lol it would make sense but not everyone is wired that way but thanks for the suggestion
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Posted by cappiegirl
@whorpio lol it would make sense but not everyone is wired that way but thanks for the suggestion

I like your vibe ? Sorry I can't be much help, but I do sympathize for your situation Sad I hope you get clarity and are able to move on.

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You can go for a long gut-busting run


Or you can drink 12 beers in an afternoon


Or just sit quietly and feel your heart burn. And burn


I think it's just time. And distractions

Hopefully meet someone new smile
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Be emotionally strong. I know it is difficult but that is what is required here. It will help you in your future. Obviously it will be painful initially but trust me it will be worth it :-)
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Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
First, I feel for you. I went through this recently and wish the experience on no one.


Second, what worked for me was to focus on bettering myself- career-wise- spiritually- emotionally- etc. Doing this kept me very busy (i.e. distracted) and the benefit was, months later, I had new accomplishments, new experiences and new memories to build from.


Third, know that this will take time-- and whatever time it takes you is OK. This is your healing process- not someone else. Don't judge yourself based on some other persons timeline.


Fourth, don't forget to forgive yourself.


I know it seems like "better" is a long way away but you will get there.

I truly wish you the best.
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@ringofsaturn... yes i agree, but he keep reaching out to me either directly (deleted his number but didnt block it) or via common friends to "be friends" as I am such an amazing women and he doesnt want to lose me in his own words. wtf. Cannot really move city unfortunately.


He is also capricorn so he should know that this is just selfish from his side, if you dont like me let me go not trying to keep me around.


Anyway thank you all for the support and for letting me vent. I will get through this, we cappies are unbreakable I just need to strengthen my resistance and distance myself complete so i can move on.




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Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
Strategy is to find someone else, and quickly.
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Posted by cappiegirl
@ringofsaturn... yes i agree, but he keep reaching out to me either directly (deleted his number but didnt block it) or via common friends to "be friends" as I am such an amazing women and he doesnt want to lose me in his own words. wtf. Cannot really move city unfortunately.


He is also capricorn so he should know that this is just selfish from his side, if you dont like me let me go not trying to keep me around.


Anyway thank you all for the support and for letting me vent. I will get through this, we cappies are unbreakable I just need to strengthen my resistance and distance myself complete so i can move on.




What an ass! Have you explained to him that friendship is not your thing?

If you did - then he is an ass. Selfish one!

How can you like such a creep? Forget him! I know...❤️
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After a lengthy period of sobbing myself to sleep and struggling to find the motivation to get out of bed for a couple of weeks, I eventually tell myself how lame I'm being and start focusing on my work or hobbies.


Accomplishing any goal you may have is the fast lane to forgetting him. Just do you. Make yourself feel good.
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For me, it's work, housework, exercise, and wine - in that order.
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@daron76 and @EarthyLeo thanks for sharing your experience. Upwards and onwards.. cappies are never defeated it's just temporary set back.
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Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


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Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
If it was the best connection ... It definitely wouldn't be unrequited .... There is never a equal exchange in unrequited love... One or the other is always taking... Codependent on the next... This is actually the worst kind of connection because it leads to obsessions ... And could possibly lead to mental depression or worse... Jail ... The best connection is the equal exchange ... You couldn't have possibly experienced this if it was unrequited ... You can get sex whipped though this is only thing that makes a person feel connected in these types of connections ... That is what feeds it... Not love... Unrequited love is lust based... To get over this... Love yourself by breaking obsessive ways... And you will attract true love... And I can tell ya ... It's nothing like unrequited ... Unrequited is toxic on many levels because it creates illusions of being in love
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Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
click to expand
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when we go into the negative with ourselves. both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile


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been in love with man for more than 3 years i think i am still not over

him Sad
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Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
I just bought an espresso machine .

Next week I'm going to learn how to brew beer at home .

I might take up an instrument , learn a new language and start to paint .


details
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile


click to expand



Really needed to read this.
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Posted by Adreamuponwaking
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
I just bought an espresso machine .

Next week I'm going to learn how to brew beer at home .

I might take up an instrument , learn a new language and start to paint .


click to expand
Good luck not to seeing THE FACE in espresso machine and not thinking of it while brewing...
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Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
click to expand
It's because you are 26...
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Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...
click to expand


not sure what you mean but okay lol

details
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

click to expand
You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

click to expand




Of course love is complicated because people are but what the dude said has some truth to it. I'm currently going through something like this.






details
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!





Of course love is complicated because people are but what the dude said has some truth to it. I'm currently going through something like this.






click to expand
Dudes know shit!

details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!





Of course love is complicated because people are but what the dude said has some truth to it. I'm currently going through something like this.






Dudes know shit!

click to expand


lmao well damn

details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

click to expand
It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


details
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


click to expand
It's like saying - if you have mental condition - it's your fault!

Sounds so much like what P-Angel would say...are you in training?
details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Adreamuponwaking
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
I just bought an espresso machine .

Next week I'm going to learn how to brew beer at home .

I might take up an instrument , learn a new language and start to paint .


Good luck not to seeing THE FACE in espresso machine and not thinking of it while brewing...
click to expand
I think it will help my dating life .


I plan on inviting people over to my cute apartment on a snowy or rainy day which is located in a quaint neighborhood ( think Greenwich village in NYC ) and making them an espresso drink with or without Japanese whiskey and fresh whipped cream .


They can enjoy it next to the fireplace and we can talk about books and life .


details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


It's like saying - if you have mental condition - it's your fault!

Sounds so much like what P-Angel would say...are you in training?
click to expand
If I recall, aren't you the person who's married and has a side dude who's also married? And both your spouses don't know and this has been going on for years or something? Nobody made you get involved in this situation and it definitely isn't about love. You choose who you are and how react and respond. It's that simple.


The defense rests.


"Judge, I move to have this case dismissed on the grounds that the petitioner, Gemitati, lacks standing to lodge a complaint."


details
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


It's like saying - if you have mental condition - it's your fault!

Sounds so much like what P-Angel would say...are you in training?
If I recall, aren't you the person who's married and has a side dude who's also married? And both your spouses don't know and this has been going on for years or something? Nobody made you get involved in this situation and it definitely isn't about love. You choose who you are and how react and respond. It's that simple.


The defense rests.


"Judge, I move to have this case dismissed on the grounds that the petitioner, Gemitati, lacks standing to lodge a complaint."


click to expand
Your memory serves you well.

But...is my story relevant how?

Just want to pick? You are welcome!

details
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


It's like saying - if you have mental condition - it's your fault!

Sounds so much like what P-Angel would say...are you in training?
If I recall, aren't you the person who's married and has a side dude who's also married? And both your spouses don't know and this has been going on for years or something? Nobody made you get involved in this situation and it definitely isn't about love. You choose who you are and how react and respond. It's that simple.


The defense rests.


"Judge, I move to have this case dismissed on the grounds that the petitioner, Gemitati, lacks standing to lodge a complaint."


Your memory serves you well.

But...is my story relevant how?

Just want to pick? You are welcome!

click to expand
Lol if you can't even phathom basic level personal responsibility when it comes to your own story and how it applies to your comments in this thread then there's no need in even carrying on the discussionsmile


details
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Shooting_the_Moon_that_I_call_Mars
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by Impulsv
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
The reason it hurts is that you're looking for reciprocation instead of loving because you can and not expecting anything back.


To be honest, this will bring a person's true intentions into focus. One's strategy shouldn't be to love in order to prove something or get something back. If you truly love someone, the only thing that matters is the time you share with them whether you end up together or not. Of course you don't let them mistreat you, but just love them and live. If it happens, it happens. I learned by experience.


I'm going to send it out there in the universe

Send me a wise sag like the above

ugh

I can't belive I said that
Thank you and we're not as bad as you think smile


This is just something I realised about myself and how love works and to be honest there's really no deep mystery to it. Love and understanding are the same and not separate.


Often in these situations, I see people do things like cut contact, "work on themselves," etc and that goes back to my earlier comment. What is one's "intentions?" I'm not saying this about the OP but often we do this and it has a dual message. We do this to both "up our game" and to punish the other person for rejecting us...neither of which is actually about loving ourselves or them...it is ego. But when are going into the negative with ourselves and both people get hurt. If we truly love someone, we want them to be happy even if it's not without despite the investment we put into them. I know that is incredibly hard to do or understanding but once a person reaches the ability to do this, love flows like a river and they will see that the love they give comes back to them. It is just from other places. There's a lot more, but I'm just trying to keep it simplesmile





Really needed to read this.
It's because you are 26...


not sure what you mean but okay lol

You would only believe in this crap while young!

Life with love is more complicated and no one have an answer!

It's only complicated because you make it that way...notice I said YOU. You reap what you sow.


It's like saying - if you have mental condition - it's your fault!

Sounds so much like what P-Angel would say...are you in training?
If I recall, aren't you the person who's married and has a side dude who's also married? And both your spouses don't know and this has been going on for years or something? Nobody made you get involved in this situation and it definitely isn't about love. You choose who you are and how react and respond. It's that simple.


The defense rests.


"Judge, I move to have this case dismissed on the grounds that the petitioner, Gemitati, lacks standing to lodge a complaint."


Your memory serves you well.

But...is my story relevant how?

Just want to pick? You are welcome!

Lol if you can't even phathom basic level personal responsibility when it comes to your own story and how it applies to your comments in this thread then there's no need in even carrying on the discussionsmile


click to expand
So...stfu!!!

???
details
Posted by rabidtalker
Posted by cappiegirl
When we fall we really fall, if the other person doesn't reciprocate how do you manage to let go of your deep feelings?

I am trying to bury mines for a month now but in no avail. There are other guys interested but I just know that this was the best connection.

What is your strategy?
Strategy is to find someone else, and quickly.
click to expand
I Disagree

details
@beautifulsoul74 I respect your opinion but the reality was that he felt exactly the same way otherwise he wouldnt make all the effort to keep me now or coming back to my life one way or another. For his own reasons he denied his feelings even there were right in front of us...


Capricorns can read people, we are very rarely wrong.
details
@caplove


Yes very weird, he just doesnt want to let me go. However it will be me letting him go so I dont block other people, like any cappie who really felt for someone we move on permanently but just need time to get to that point.
details
Posted by cappiegirl
@beautifulsoul74 I respect your opinion but the reality was that he felt exactly the same way otherwise he wouldnt make all the effort to keep me now or coming back to my life one way or another. For his own reasons he denied his feelings even there were right in front of us...


Capricorns can read people, we are very rarely wrong.
And what exactly did he do wrong in this situation?


details
Try and focus on the other things in your life. Personally I write a list of things I need to get done that week, hobbies I've been putting off etc, and then just take it day by day. I dont try bury the bad feelings when those emotions come up, but rather just let it sit there and let it come, dont try make excuses or hide it, just feel it for awhile and acknowledge it without feeding any negative stories into it. After doing that for awhile push forward with your day. Eventually the feeling will be less and less strong, but I wouldnt try and go for other guys yet. Try and improve yourself so that one day you can find someone as strong and confident as you will be.
details
What I've learned about unrequited love is that it never suffices.


So the pain you feel now is temporary but the joy you will feel when you meet someone who returns your love will be tremendous.


Hang in there, do yoga and reach out to friends. cyber hugs
details

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