Is this Capricorn male interest?!?

Im 27yr Libra female hes 33yr cap male him and his ex wife broke up 8months ago from being with her for 12 yrs just a mutual break up. They have a child to gether and she also has ason from previous relationship which son calls cappy Dad.
Mutal friend (my house mate) set us up as cappy and I were both on dating apps. We meet mutually through the friend as a day out with his kids boy and daughter at awater park was a fun day we had seen each other on the dating app and he proceeded to message me from then on.
He then invited me and the mutual couple around to his for a Bbq with his daughter. then he asked me out on a date we had dinner and had a great time I stayed at his as we watch afinal of football together we almost had sex but I decided against it. He said he was glad we waited.

next few days he was going back to our home country were we are both from for his best mans wedding. didnt reallly here from as much. I messaged to say I had fun on the date and hope we can do it again he said the same. but still not alot of messaging. I texted wishing him agood trip etc.

He got back from wedding and messaged me alittle telling me about the wedding etc but again not messaging everyday like he was before the date. He said to mutual friend he had fun

then few days after arriving back from wedding we were messaging on evening funny messagjng like we do and he totally opened up and said to me Hes not sure were he is at with relationships and isnt ready for a mrs at the minute He said he is attracted to me though which makes it awkward because he thought I was a cool chick because as we do get on so well but he understands if I want to friend zone our stuff.

I said im thankfull he has been so open and Im attracted to him and not looking for anything too serious. I do understand were he is at. so happy to just relax and see were it goes.

he said he wants to fuck me bad and appears really horny and sends me a dick shot! but ends up inviting me to go for swim on the sunday with him and his duaghter which was nice. he said he doesnt want to confuse his daughter as she will always be no. one. he said it doesnt help that she always ask after me as she is only 8yrs old. I said I have told him I would never get inbetwwen that as I have broken parents and understand.

I do really like him and his children as hes such a great father and we get along really well.

So things has simmered since the chat couple messaged here and there but not every day.

this time I hadnt heard from him for afew days and I finish work on afriday and he is at my house seeing mutual friend(flate mate) so we chat it is fine he mentioned he needs to go and said good by etc. no messgaing. the next day my flat mate and cappy are doing some work together and end up back at cappys house for a Bbq and swim and said to come over which I wasnt invited formally by the cappy but i head over anyway. so few beers not sure where cappy and I are at but I just act cool etc we

He's not emotionally ready. Divorce is tough. Takes time to heal from that. He likes you, but it could be a rebound thing. Don't sleep with him - you're likely to get hurt. He needs to sow some wild oats before he can get serious with anyone. Don't be that transition girl.

He just ended a 12 yrs relationship

Give him time to breathe! Sheesh

Date more and date men who are emotionally available

He flat out has been honest and told you what's going on with him.

so what do I do? we had sex at the Bbq as i stayed at his. we kisses acouple of times ..... and I messaged to say we I had fun I realise hes in this situtation. do I keep messaging him every now and again and be patient?? or not messag at all ..... as we are friends and have mutual friends....

If he doesn't contact you, I would text him once more, casually, just saying hi, or whatever you would usually say. And then nothing until he contacts you. The reason why I would contact him again at all is because of the sex. Just as a hint that it wasn't just sex you were after - that you are still interested.

He needs to get off of dating apps, stop going on dates, stop bringing his kids around, and stop having sex if he's not ready.

Posted by lnana04
He needs to get off of dating apps, stop going on dates, stop bringing his kids around, and stop having sex if he's not ready.

Amen!!

If he's not ready, he's just going to string her along.

Posted by HappyCapper
If he doesn't contact you, I would text him once more, casually, just saying hi, or whatever you would usually say. And then nothing until he contacts you. The reason why I would contact him again at all is because of the sex. Just as a hint that it wasn't just sex you were after - that you are still interested.

I agree. ONCE. Then the ball is in his court.

I have read it takes one month per every year spent in a relationship to be ready to be in another real relationship again.

Posted by truecap

Posted by lnana04
He needs to get off of dating apps, stop going on dates, stop bringing his kids around, and stop having sex if he's not ready.

Amen!!

If he's not ready, he's just going to string her along.

click to expand

Absolutely. Question is, though, if he realises how ready or not ready he is at this point.

well yea he was the one who said should we just have sex already. so I shiuld just keep messaging every now and again to check in how he is then? as he said "we get on so well"

and do you think he will start courting me again when he is ready?

Im not expecting him to do anything hes told me hesnot ready for relationship but he told me he was attracted to me Im wondering if hes capable of being FWB if I should bring it up or not as i messaged him yesterday abd we were just having normal banter chat spoke about the bbq evening etc....

Why the HELL would a woman offer up FWB? Men don't respect women who FWB with them and they definitely don't take them serious as relationship potential.

But if all you want is a roll in the hay, then go right ahead.

I don't mean that meanly. Just that you decide how you want things to go.

yea I get it just gutted because we get on so well! but hes not ready and I really like him and yea I do want a relationship so ive set my self up to be hurt once again. Jst trust him because he has been so open with me from the word go. Just wished he never appeared so interested if hea not ready! I know hes been a a few dates from dating apps and all been dis

Truecap about the 1 month for every year that seems about right and maybe even more. We don't know why his marriage ended in the 1st place. A mutual break up after 12 years, something happen! He could have not been faithful in his current relationship. This man said he wants to fuck you bad and sent you a dick shot!!! Don’t tell him you want no FWB. You are setting yourself up to be hurt if you want a relationship with him. Soon as he said he want to F u bad you should have made him work extra hard for it. Because if he really really wanted it that bad he wouldn’t have been that dam honest and risk the chance of having you. He would have waited until he had sex with you and was 100% sure about your feelings towards him. By you having sex with him after he was so honest lead him to think either your easy, vulnerable or you wanted him just as bad.

Posted by faith $ golphin
Truecap about the 1 month for every year that seems about right and maybe even more. We don't know why his marriage ended in the 1st place. A mutual break up after 12 years, something happen! He could have not been faithful in his current relationship. This man said he wants to fuck you bad and sent you a dick shot!!! Don’t tell him you want no FWB. You are setting yourself up to be hurt if you want a relationship with him. Soon as he said he want to F u bad you should have made him work extra hard for it. Because if he really really wanted it that bad he wouldn’t have been that dam honest and risk the chance of having you. He would have waited until he had sex with you and was 100% sure about your feelings towards him. By you having sex with him after he was so honest lead him to think either your easy, vulnerable or you wanted him just as bad.

I agree with this.

Honestly, I would have been offended if someone told me they wanted to F me bad. Really? That's all you see in me? You don't want to be with me for me? You only want to F me?

When someone tells you that, they're only focused on sex so you can either run or make them wait that much longer.

Whomever controls the kitty has the power. Might even be fun to tease the hell out of them. 😉

Just another frustrated, horny, divorced man, in my opinion....

Not saying he's a bad guy, because he isn't. It's just these are the type of men who are oh so nice, and they like you and care about you, they really do, they may even have some feeling for you........BUT, they're not emotionally available and will string you along because they're not looking for commitment and a future at the moment.

I've been there, in his shoes.

He already got the goods so you need advice on what to do afterwards. I need to know about the sex part? Did he go down on you? I hope you didn't do him!!!! Did he make love to you or was he just fucking u like he said? Did he show a lot of affection? I'm asking because him saying he wants to fuck you just don’t sit well with me. I’m wondering if he was that dam horny or if he feels an affectionate connection with you. If he has emotional feelings towards you than you have something to try to build off of if you play your cards right. If he just horny as hell then you would need that snapper to hook him. lol

Thank you faith $ golphin!!! Yes i probably did have sex with him too soon!! but yes I do just want to know how I get around this......... I really like him and would be super patiant for him if it was just friends for now ........ Yes fwb is abad Idea I guess me just trying to hang into a replationship with him. But dont worry I havent suggested this to him. I message dhim twice after we had sex second time just being friends and normal chit chat he brought up about we should have gone for a swim after we had sex bla bla. the sex was just normal nothing amazing. no he didnt go down on me he was on top for most of the time and then he wanted me to come for him. We had sex in the morning as well he told me it was good after. Im thinking just message him once aweek caually for a chat and see where it goes from there. Not sure if i suggest to hang out in the day nothing to formal maybe the beach or somthing ..... thanks for you help!!!!

Well since it was nothing amazing you can hold out. If he still willing to go out with you a lot than maybe you having sex with him didn't jeopardize anthing. Don't just keep the relationship sexually make sure you spend time with him outside of the bedroom. You should try to go out with him as much as possible. Don' t be the one to initiate it all he time. If he don't never initiate going out than u need to hold back sexually from him. If you really want the sex then do it but not to often. Dont show him you want him more than he want you. Me personal I don't have sex with a man unless he give me oral. And Im not doing them!!! If he's trying to be in a commitment relationship with you then its cool but if not hold back certain things. If you gonna be just screwing him or (FBW) you make sure he do everything you want and need and always hold back from him. What do u mean by he wanted you to come for him—

Yeap I totally get all of that it makes sense. He initiated the messaging today, which was just our normal messaging routine. no Im not going to iniate hanging out at all do you think I should still initiate some messaging? And ill leave it to him to intiate the spending time together. FWB is not going to happen I really like his guy and am totally happy to be patiant with him. Im happy to get on with my life and do my thing and see where he wants to take this on along term even if it is still good friends.

thanks for your help!

or I suggest we hit the beach some time !

You can suggest because waiting for him can be a while!!!

ok so have only heard from him messaging me little bits as he saw me walking down the street one day.
Anyway at the weekend I messaged him asking what he was up too, he said he has not any plans mabe go out with a mate. I suggested for him to come and meet me
after my work xmas dinner. so he rang me and sorted out a plan. also chatting to me about his work. so he meet up with me after. it was fun we had a good chat and told me
he was on a dating app and a transvestite had messaged him! I said i thought you were done with those apps!! he said he was and deffintly is now!!! Anyway he proceeded to tell about about his ex wife and that she asked him to come around for sex to her house!! so he did!!! just on thursday night!! And he said he is so done and it felt like it was closure for him!! and that he really does not care anymore!! So I was supportive of him and glad he has come to this point. We had a long long old chat then i mentioned Im going to go home. He was like ooh ok Buy! like annoyed I was just going. anyway we ended up deciding to go back to his place and lets get taxi.

Get out side and said actually can we go to your house(he has never stayed at mine Ive stayed at his twice.)

So off we went I deffintly did not expect to have sex as he had just had it with his ex wife. We had fun chatting right in to the early hours of the morning he tried to have sex with me but I said no and explained why. He had to leave early in the morning for work on sunday and told me he wasnt going and hell stay here and chill.

through the night also told me his daughter can not stop asking after me That he doesnt know what Ive done but she loves me and is being real little shit for her mother she is a real little daddys girl and such a sweet mature 8year old.

please help am I wasting my time with this man i can see we have somthing but patience is key I think.....

could someone help me out alittle bit more?

I just really dont want to be played??

Posted by Jaxz88
I just really dont want to be played??

Look. He's playing. He's not playing you intentionallly, but he's playing. He's obviously not over his ex. If he were over her, he wouldn't be talking about her and he definitely wouldn't be having sex with her.

He is rebounding, even if he thinks he's not, he is.

He's not a bad guy, but he is not one you should be thinking about seriously. I've been down that road and I know where he is.

The only thing you're going to get out of him is a roll in the hay.

Protect yourself and don't develop feelings for him. If you do, you're going to get hurt.

yea thanks i get it. no I didnt have sex with him this time and am not going to message him.