My cap struggling with a breakup
This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by Pisces_Grace on Wednesday, April 24, 2013 and has 19 replies.
Hi All
I have been seeing a Cap who seemed to have been going through the last stages of an old relationship when he met...
As a Pisces... sorry but we really do have these unseen powers that just bring truth and unseen situations right in front of our eyes... my cap would act strange, disappear sometimes, but there was a growing trust and sweet intimacy between us I always let the bad attributes go in he excuse that the relationship is still new I shouldnt expect too much
He has been in a toxic relationship on and off for 6 years with an Aries woman, a doormat of sorts who just wont let go... my cap has lied to this woman again and again about him seeing me and she seems to hear no truth about the situation... she says they are over to me and then turns and open her legs to him anytime ... its on and off...
I have broken things off with him because of this situation with this woman and I am healing and loving myself and planning to enjoy seeing other guys... as a Pisces however I feel there is still some lingering on towards me from cappy ... as if he is making a decision to start a new cycle in his life and yet he doesnt seem to be able to let go of this vampire! No really the woman cheated on her husband 6 years ago with my cappy, the husband has since committed suicide and and left her with 2 fatherless kids wtf!!! the woman has goiven up her family and her kids happiness just because of a man who fucks real good (caps are not matched!!!), some women are sick and this is a sick and twisted situation why won't cappy break away from this woman ... his life is low and in ruins... I am not offering to fix it or anything... Im just saying why is this guy not seeing the light of escape from a bad situation and a destructive relationship ....
What could he be thinking and planning now ? Is there anyway to predict what may come about the situation ... do caps know how to escape old bad relationships and start afresh or are they terrified of change ... any advice for what is the best thing for me to do would be greatly appreciated...
thanks guys I would greatly appreciate it
I have been seeing a Cap who seemed to have been going through the last stages of an old relationship when he met...
As a Pisces... sorry but we really do have these unseen powers that just bring truth and unseen situations right in front of our eyes... my cap would act strange, disappear sometimes, but there was a growing trust and sweet intimacy between us I always let the bad attributes go in he excuse that the relationship is still new I shouldnt expect too much
He has been in a toxic relationship on and off for 6 years with an Aries woman, a doormat of sorts who just wont let go... my cap has lied to this woman again and again about him seeing me and she seems to hear no truth about the situation... she says they are over to me and then turns and open her legs to him anytime ... its on and off...
I have broken things off with him because of this situation with this woman and I am healing and loving myself and planning to enjoy seeing other guys... as a Pisces however I feel there is still some lingering on towards me from cappy ... as if he is making a decision to start a new cycle in his life and yet he doesnt seem to be able to let go of this vampire! No really the woman cheated on her husband 6 years ago with my cappy, the husband has since committed suicide and and left her with 2 fatherless kids wtf!!! the woman has goiven up her family and her kids happiness just because of a man who fucks real good (caps are not matched!!!), some women are sick and this is a sick and twisted situation why won't cappy break away from this woman ... his life is low and in ruins... I am not offering to fix it or anything... Im just saying why is this guy not seeing the light of escape from a bad situation and a destructive relationship ....
What could he be thinking and planning now ? Is there anyway to predict what may come about the situation ... do caps know how to escape old bad relationships and start afresh or are they terrified of change ... any advice for what is the best thing for me to do would be greatly appreciated...
thanks guys I would greatly appreciate it
I need to add that not just due to Pisces intuition but based on my whole life of having a capricorn father, I know what a living hell a cap man's life can be if they end up with the wrong woman ...
I cant begin to explain how deeply I understand these men based on my lifelong observation of my own dad and how I know this man is making the biggest mistake of his whole life
What should I do ... Im happy and balanced Im not desperate to be with him... but damn the self destruction is weird... is there anything that can be done for this guy to wake up ...
Sigh ...
I cant begin to explain how deeply I understand these men based on my lifelong observation of my own dad and how I know this man is making the biggest mistake of his whole life
What should I do ... Im happy and balanced Im not desperate to be with him... but damn the self destruction is weird... is there anything that can be done for this guy to wake up ...
Sigh ...
He probably feels guilty for what he did to her family. Do we know why the husband committed suicide? If it was because of the breakup of family dynamics, your cap probably feels somewhat responsible for that.
Just my two cents.
Just my two cents.
He needs time to battle his demons. Only he can do that. I don't think there's much you can do until he decides he's had enough.
thank you truecap for your insight... yes the reason for suicide was the breakup... the woman cheated with my cappy on her husband and then went on to leave/breakup with her husband... and the rest is history as they say
so if the guilt is keeping him, he seems to be clearly not staying for love or happiness or anything like that as he keeps seeking that from other women the likes of which is myself ... what is he likely to do any ideas ?
anymore insight on what I should expect or best for me to do in the situation would be greatly appreciated
so if the guilt is keeping him, he seems to be clearly not staying for love or happiness or anything like that as he keeps seeking that from other women the likes of which is myself ... what is he likely to do any ideas ?
anymore insight on what I should expect or best for me to do in the situation would be greatly appreciated
spot on... than you once again truecap
thanks cow puncher I appreciate your input ....
the woman is at least 10 years older than him ... damn ... I should never have got involved with this situation but how was I supposed to know, caps are pretty darn persistent I couldnt say no to this guy asking me out... I somehow regret but am learning great lessons here...
What kills a capricorn man like myself is the faithfulness of my words and my loyalty... He may be trapped because of this situation. Regardless, he knows what he has to do. He just does not know how to yet. In time he will figure out a way to fix it. And he will thank you for staying by his side through the process...
Wow PG! Just wow! I too am a Pisces woman who is in love with a Cap and our road to the happiness we have found together now was not easy partly because of the women he let into his life before me and the guilt he felt when things fell apart and couldn't be fixed. It took him years to get to a place where he could love me and be apart of our relationship with a healthy heart and mind. It's funny that you say this woman in your Cap's life is an Aries because my Cap had a particular Aries woman (his sister) who had him so caught up in BS and drama that he didn't see the sucker punch when it came but when it did he was devastated by her betrayal of all he'd done for her and her family. We can talk about it now and even laugh about certain things but he finally had to go to hell and back to see what I already saw about her when we first became friends and after we became a couple. She was just one of many who blew my Cap's heart and mind so it is likely that your Cap may take a long time to heal over what happened in your situation, especially if he is harboring guilt over that woman's husband and the loss of the childrens' father. Family means the world to Caps so to think he had a hand in destroying one is not a good place for his head to be in but only he can free himself from those particular demons. Cap men can be very weak for the wrong people, especially women, so don't take it personally. I used to get so mad on his behalf watching people run through him and treat him like crap and then have him go back to these same jokers after they had proved they didn't deserve his love, loyalty and trust.
Carry on as you have and let him come back to you when and/or if he can ever forgive himself and find a way to move forward. Best of luck.
Carry on as you have and let him come back to you when and/or if he can ever forgive himself and find a way to move forward. Best of luck.
Honestly, there's nothing you can do to help him. He just need to open his eyes. You see my ex fiance is a Cap and almost the same situation like yours happen but not as dramatic. I told him I loved him so much and if that person is the one who complete him then who am I to stop him. I disappeared for 2 weeks. I did not reply to text, ignored phone call and I ignored his email He came looking for me and promised he will break it off with the girl in front of me. He did. I felt horrible that the girl was put on spot but that's the only way I would believe him. We ended up breaking up because in the long run we wanted different things in life. But till this day we are good friends. And when we were in a relationship I was his princess. Do nothing. You cannot control what others wants to do. I sense that he feels guilty that the husband killed himself. He doesn't look at it the way you do. To him he feels responsible and for that he is drawn to her. Capricorn symphathetic to others specially if they are involved. Good luck
Thanks guys... he is very complex ...
You guys have made my week thank you soooooooo much you are so spot on!
Blessings
You guys have made my week thank you soooooooo much you are so spot on!
Blessings
We just spoke on the phone and he spoke of her in past tense ... wow shocker
Ok I dont want to read too much into it... she is due on a trip out of the country for at least 5 months ... I think this Eclipse today may have done sent her out of the country
It doesnt make the situation any easier... cappy is still very stubborn to deal with ... But I hope things get a little better ....
Ok I dont want to read too much into it... she is due on a trip out of the country for at least 5 months ... I think this Eclipse today may have done sent her out of the country
It doesnt make the situation any easier... cappy is still very stubborn to deal with ... But I hope things get a little better ....
So you're going to keep on as usual?
What happens when she gets back? Is he going to break your heart by seeing her again?
Just be aware: Caps are loyal, ya know, and he could feel a responsibility to her in that he will maintain a connection with her from now on. Whether it be as lovers, friends, whatever, he is likely to always be around for her and be someone she can depend on because of that responsibility he feels for her. They could have an emotional attachment to each other even if they are with other people. And no one can penetrate that because of their history and all they've been through.
Just make sure you are capable of dealing with that in case that happens.
What happens when she gets back? Is he going to break your heart by seeing her again?
Just be aware: Caps are loyal, ya know, and he could feel a responsibility to her in that he will maintain a connection with her from now on. Whether it be as lovers, friends, whatever, he is likely to always be around for her and be someone she can depend on because of that responsibility he feels for her. They could have an emotional attachment to each other even if they are with other people. And no one can penetrate that because of their history and all they've been through.
Just make sure you are capable of dealing with that in case that happens.
Hmmm. Looking at it from that angle makes me think: Is capricorn responsibility always a positive trait? Or a stifling one?
you bring such brilliant points truecap ... and what you are addressing is exactly the point I am at with him right now...
Definitely not continuing as usual at all!! The game plan is going to change drastically if he is serious about us continuing our relationship together... the only relief I feel is that we can work on this in the absence of this woman which increases the chances of making good progress in the right direction while she is out of the picture...
Since all the recent drama, I have started going out and seeing other guys as a first step, so cap knows the game is not going to be played on his terms... I have communicated this and he knows it and I have made it clear to him that if a guy I am seeing seems to be on sure footing about what he wants I will give that first guy a chance
Caps always think through things and possibly maybe willing to make a change when they feel they might lose someone, at least my cap is like that... he knows Im serious and im not going to waste my time unless he engages in a relationship with me based on authenticity, openness, honesty and integrity
I'm not kidding he knows this full well... and no matter what he does, I can only be true to myself and my own happiness ...
I can only move forward with him on the basis of major changes being able to be made in our relationship and him being able to honor my needs in the relationship
I dont know if this makes any sense Im still working on this as I go... plz keep your insights pouring ...
Definitely not continuing as usual at all!! The game plan is going to change drastically if he is serious about us continuing our relationship together... the only relief I feel is that we can work on this in the absence of this woman which increases the chances of making good progress in the right direction while she is out of the picture...
Since all the recent drama, I have started going out and seeing other guys as a first step, so cap knows the game is not going to be played on his terms... I have communicated this and he knows it and I have made it clear to him that if a guy I am seeing seems to be on sure footing about what he wants I will give that first guy a chance
Caps always think through things and possibly maybe willing to make a change when they feel they might lose someone, at least my cap is like that... he knows Im serious and im not going to waste my time unless he engages in a relationship with me based on authenticity, openness, honesty and integrity
I'm not kidding he knows this full well... and no matter what he does, I can only be true to myself and my own happiness ...
I can only move forward with him on the basis of major changes being able to be made in our relationship and him being able to honor my needs in the relationship
I dont know if this makes any sense Im still working on this as I go... plz keep your insights pouring ...
On another note, I have felt in the past 2 days that he is amazed at how I have handled the situation and kind of shell shocked that I stuck it out with him without losing temper or perspective etc.
I feel a slight loyalty from him starting to grow towards me through this experience... hopefully I am right that getting through it together may make our bond stronger ...
I feel good potential is there but needs to be worked at continuously in order to grow...
I feel a slight loyalty from him starting to grow towards me through this experience... hopefully I am right that getting through it together may make our bond stronger ...
I feel good potential is there but needs to be worked at continuously in order to grow...
Good for you for standing your ground and getting your point across! He needs to know he could lose you. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. Just stay steady and true to yourself. That's all you can do. Hopefully, he will realize you are loyal and that bond you have will keep building. I wish you luck.
Personally, it's too much for me and I wouldn't have the patience for it. Yes, caps are patient, but we do draw the line somewhere. I hope he notices what you are made of and he appreciates your sturdiness. You're a better woman than I.
Personally, it's too much for me and I wouldn't have the patience for it. Yes, caps are patient, but we do draw the line somewhere. I hope he notices what you are made of and he appreciates your sturdiness. You're a better woman than I.
truecap awww that was a real ego booster...
I am Taurus Rising and Scorpio Moon so these planets really help me to balance the overt compassionate aspects of Pisces and I think my Scorpio fierceness has kept me alive through this ... I feel as if I have been to hell and back with him, and was oftentimes never sure if I was really gonna make it back from hell LOLOL
When we are together we are like best friends and we do all sorts of crazy things together.... I'm gonna try and focus a bit more on this side of things as well so as to not overwhelm him too much as caps don't deal too well with emotions and then plus the breakup I think it all piles up on him in a kind of sour saturnian cruelty LOLOL
Im having fun and trying to enjoy my life and to nurture self and, given his cancer moon, his intuition is quite strong he picks up on this and he knows he needs to shape up ...
I hope it will be a happy ending Lord knows I pray
I am Taurus Rising and Scorpio Moon so these planets really help me to balance the overt compassionate aspects of Pisces and I think my Scorpio fierceness has kept me alive through this ... I feel as if I have been to hell and back with him, and was oftentimes never sure if I was really gonna make it back from hell LOLOL
When we are together we are like best friends and we do all sorts of crazy things together.... I'm gonna try and focus a bit more on this side of things as well so as to not overwhelm him too much as caps don't deal too well with emotions and then plus the breakup I think it all piles up on him in a kind of sour saturnian cruelty LOLOL
Im having fun and trying to enjoy my life and to nurture self and, given his cancer moon, his intuition is quite strong he picks up on this and he knows he needs to shape up ...
I hope it will be a happy ending Lord knows I pray
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