Pour Avoir des D?fauts (To Have Flaws)

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by cappysweetie on Saturday, July 8, 2006 and has 31 replies.
We all have personality imperfections about ourselves that we either can improve or embrace.
Indeed, I am a flawed female who is constantly working on self improvement. What are are your flaws in the followong areas:
1. Personally
2. Socially
3. Professionally
4.. Romantically
5. *** Name just 2 flaws that you are not ashamed ? These 2 flaws are apart of who you are and are something you will not change. Do they make you unique in some way? ***
OOOH, HI JD
I just wanted to do something different ^_^.
Sorry sb and JD
I was eating an early dinner smile I have a project to work on so I went on and ate something Big Grin
LOL, you don't suck at french sb ... your spelling is just fine Winking
WOW JD, you live in Canada? Hahaha, you live quite close to my home state smile
Okay, I'm assuming that you all are waiting for me to post mine before you post yours ... okay, give me a moment Winking
Hey Branh, we are quite different in all five both we do have some similarites ... you'll see smile
Okay finally
1. Personally
Fear f my own ignorance -- I don?t feel that I am intelligent enough for my age. I can pick up on things quick but I learn things at a slower pace which is very uncomfortable to those who can instantly learn something brand new. I have little faith in my own capabilities. Confidence in my own opinions is much stronger then my confidence in what I can do. For example, I enjoy cooking but I have a fear that my food should taste better then it actually does -- I get compliments on my food but it?s still to good enough. There are many things I know how to do but I am fearful of bring them to the surface because I have been belittled in the past along with being called conceited. My self-image has been a problem for years because I generally don?t see myself as being an attractive female. Average ? sure, but not beautiful. This insecurity had much to do with my upbringing as well.
Also, I can be ultra sensitive at times, my insecurities results in my questioning peoples motives towards me
2. Socially
I am usually shy when it comes to meeting new people. I can really engage in a conversation unless I feel comfortable with that person. Unfortunately I cannot get friendly with a person I just met 20 minutes ago -- if I do it?s rare. My shyness holds me back tremendously -- I am assertive but you have to be aggressive in today?s society, in which I am not. I am better talking within a small group of people then I am in talking in a crowd. I can deal with too many people but the crowd can get overwhelming after a while-- I generally run errands when there?s not too many people in the stores or when the traffic is low. If I have to do personal runs with many people around, I generally do it quickly ? I will not browse.
OOOPS, let me try that again Big Grin LOL!!!!
Okay finally
1. Personally
Fear f my own ignorance -- I don?t feel that I am intelligent enough for my age. I can pick up on things quick but I learn things at a slower pace which is very uncomfortable to those who can instantly learn something brand new. I have little faith in my own capabilities. Confidence in my own opinions is much stronger then my confidence in what I can do. For example, I enjoy cooking but I have a fear that my food should taste better then it actually does -- I get compliments on my food but it?s still to good enough. There are many things I know how to do but I am fearful of bring them to the surface because I have been belittled in the past along with being called conceited. My self-image has been a problem for years because I generally don?t see myself as being an attractive female. Average ? sure, but not beautiful. This insecurity had much to do with my upbringing as well.
Also, I can be ultra sensitive at times, my insecurities results in my questioning peoples motives towards me

2. Socially
I am usually shy when it comes to meeting new people. I can really engage in a conversation unless I feel comfortable with that person. Unfortunately I cannot get friendly with a person I just met 20 minutes ago -- if I do it?s rare. My shyness holds me back tremendously -- I am assertive but you have to be aggressive in today?s society, in which I am not. I am better talking within a small group of people then I am in talking in a crowd. I can deal with too many people but the crowd can get overwhelming after a while-- I generally run errands when there?s not too many people in the stores or when the traffic is low. If I have to do personal runs with many people around, I generally do it quickly ? I will not browse.
3. Professionally
*** I?ll speak from a students point of view *** Again shyness hold me back from many things -- I am assertive but I am not aggressive. In today?s world, you must be very forceful and competitive in the job in your chosen career path. Well, seeing that I don?t want to hurt or inconvenience anyone, this leaves me feeling left out. I?m not the ?if you can?t beat them, then join them? type of a person. Share I am adaptable but if I don?t agree with some thing I will sick to my guns regardless.
4. Romantically
I am very emotionally and I can give my heart away too soon because I feel so deeply. Also, until recently I to adapt to every guy I either dated or became serious with -- I was like an ?every woman? in so many words. Whatever skills or qualities that were outstanding to those men, I would always present that part of myself instead of the other layers that are apart of me. As a result, I felt rather empty ?. I yearned for them to at least want to know the real me but it seemed that they only wanted what was on the surface instead of what was below it. ***It?s quite funny really, the men that become my friend first before presuing anything beyond that can get to know me much better ***I am into public displays of acknowledgement NOT affection. There were boyfriends that enjoyed kissing me in public -- I convinced myself that it was a display of acknowledgement, not affection ?.haha I was lying to myself. If my love gives me a kiss on the cheek or puts his arm around me ? IT ISN?T REQUIRED if he were to do something that?s good enough for me. Yes, in the past I have said that I don?t mind pubic displays of affection, but in reality it does make me feel uneasy and a bit loose. All the other stuff should be private between us. Also, I am insecure about a man?s motives towards me because I haven?t had that much luck in the past.
5. The two flaws I embrace are ?
My voice Some people say it?s too soft and high, but I don?t care ? it my voice and I have no problem with the way it sounds.
My quest for knowledge. Yes, I get called a nerd and that I am also told that I study too much. Well I don?t care ? learning new things have never gotten anyone in trouble Winking
----
Well that's all I can think of ... writing about yourself is difficult isn't it ????
I also don't like public displays of affection either

I LOVE public displays of affection... when i love someone im going to show the world i worship that guy TongueTongueTongueTongue
HI Eliza! What's uuuuuuuuupppppppppp girl Winking
Well, a sweet kiss is fine and an arm around me and mine around him is good smile But the "tongue kissing" can be done withont so many people around. Just a prefernce of mine ... I also can't stand arguing in public either .... UGH!!! That get's under my skin!
OK guys you are sooooo darn good at expressing youself... im not all that good at expressing my feelings Sad
but lets try smile
Personally
Im not that good at expressing my feelings as i already confessedTongue

i guess thats my only Flaw smilesmilesmilesmile

socially im pretty good... i like people and have no problem in starting up a conversation with strangers...:

romantically.. im good at that too.. coz i express my feelings for my man alot and love to make him feel special and appreciated smile

Professionally... well i get along well with people and my Ex-colleagues, X boss liked me.... i just used to do my thing and not give a darn about all the crap at work.. like gossipin' or whatever.... just do your work and make sure others are doing it right too coz at the end of the day i didnt wanted to be blamed for others negligence...

hmmm.. sooo wat other things do i suck at??? OK im patient Tongue
*** giggles ***
Oh Eliza, your description was great. See, we are earth signs so we have a tendency to just write alot Winking
SB
u mean u dont like public displays of affection???

Cappisweetie,
i dont mind any displays of affection... even tongue-kissing smile

I also can't stand arguing in public either
OK now thats something that i cant stand either... why do people have to argue in public... itz soooo uurrrggghhh
LOL... ya cappisweetie, you guys ( earth signs) are amazing at expressing your feelings thru writing... my Grand aunt ( the greatest woman who ever walked this earth) was a capricorn too and her journal is just WOW... u feel your living that moment when you read her feelings and her experiences... INCREDIBLE woman
Yeah Eliza,
That's a HUGE pet-peeve of mine. If you argue with me in public ... things will not be good afterwards .... I don't like to be fronted.
ya cappisweetie, i believe in settling matters in private smile
Well, you seem to be someone who can verbally express yourself excellently smile
Cappiesweetiem

well i dont think im that good at expressing my feelings unless they are romanticTongueTongue (coz in a relationship u can express ur love with your actions) but when it comes to expressing my veiws on other issues im not as good as you, SB, Jackodaniel, Branh and Primgen... u guys are impressive smile
1. Personally.
None. [Egotastical].

2. Socially.
I tend to associate with people based on what they can do for me, and what benefits their assocation will bring, rather than just for the sake of it. I am quite snobbish in whom I talk to, and in the manner I talk to them also.
I find it impossible to talk to kids, despite the fact I'm 19. I end up saying stuff totally over their heads, or end up patronising them. That goes for people who are like.... around my age too.

3. Professionally.
Too much focus placed on profession rather than myself. As such, sometimes if I've spent the weekend studying or something then I am less effective professionally than I would be had I took some personal time. I am getting around this now though.

4. Romantically.
I plan to go to bed in the next half hour so I'm not getting into this. That should speak volumes. Sad

5. Elitist and Aspirational.
I unintentionally like niche things, such as television programmes and music that most others don't bother with. I also prefer to read broadsheet newspapers rather than tabloids, and go to the theatre rather than the cinema. I prefer bars that are exclusive rather than full of chavs.
I believe aspiration is viewed as a negative trait by some.... people I call 'victims'. They don't like to see others get ahead, and somehow believe one persons success only comes by anothers defeat. I see aspiration as being accessible to everyone - working or middle class - seeing how it's a state of mind rather than a tangible consumable one must buy.
SB,
You said:
"My ambition. I know ambition in a girl isn't attractive but I wouldn't trade this aspect of me for anything. Its something that I have seen is just me."
Can we get married? I love a girl with ambition..... and I don't know why a guy wouldn't, unless he just wants a piece of meat to have sex with.
Ambition and confidence go hand in hand. Confident girls are attractive, that is not in dispute, and being ambitious often means you are confident about something about yourself.
Salut JD,
moi aussi, je parle francais un peu. J'aime la France et le francais smile
Do you live in Montreal, JD? I like Canada. I've been there once. One of my favourites..
Definitely my type of a country! There are 2 countries in this world I'd like to live in if not in my own country, and Canada (the west coast) is one of them.
OOO Sorry JD,
I didn't see the question smile I live in Michigan ^_^.
im jealous... i wanna learn a language. smile
italian first though.
1. Personally: i can sometimes be really lazy when i need to be 'doing.' i find other things that aren't a real priority to do instead. i'll 'do' what i should be doing at the very last minute. i either make little time for the things i reeeeeeeally love (relationships the only exception), or i've made too much time for those things and am really procrastinating something i ought to be 'doing'. busy work, earning money, and striving for the 'american way' seems to take precedence which is extremely irritating to me, but i just finished school & know that i just need my financial grounding first before springing into living the way i want. i can also be impatient.
2. Socially: im bad at getting back to people who are trying to get ahold of me. im just unavailable a lot of times... doing what ever it is that i want to do, ie not calling back. When it comes to a social network, I prefer a smaller and more intimate circle, anybody outside that... i just dont have the energy for. nothing personal. so when acquaintances want to hang out i will, but i start to feel too divided and will disappear from them for a bit. I can be shy when i'm around someone i like and im a little bit less myself.
3. Professionally: i probably work harder than i should, taking on more of the load for the team.
4. Romantically: i give, becuase i enjoy doing so, more than i should too early in a relationship. though it's because i feel i cant turn down the impulses and why should i? my older sister tells me that i should 'let guys pursue... they like the hunt.' that seems like such a game to me. i despise those kinds of mind games. hate even. hard-to-get is way more appropriate a bedroom game. i prefer to be more obvious about my feelings. i like showing how i feel, but can border on excessive in my displays. i'll admit though, there could be a point to not showing all your cards at once in this respect.
5. 2 flaws I'm not ashamed of...
being that much of a giver in a relationship... i know others try to correct me about it as if it were a flaw, but i really dont see how something that makes me happy & making someone else happy as well can be a flaw. i know those people are just looking out for me.
i can speak my mind all too readily & can sometimes be too confrontational when someone challenges me, someone i love, my beliefs, or some principle of mine. not at all ashamed of that.
I am learning to be non-aggressive.
"Jealous ?
Don't you speak Spanish and English ?"
I speak english and that's about it, JD. smile I know very little spanish. I really want to go to Italy one day soon! Henceforth... I'd like to learn the language. French takes a close second as I am part french myself.
Cappysweetie,
I'm in Michigan too. smile
Ya, Spanish is a beautiful language too. Those accents kill me, they are so sexy. I took three years of Spanish while in high school and having taken one French and one Italian class since then, it's amazing how similar the Romantic languages are to each other. Spanish is supposedly one of the easier languages to learn and the way I see it, will probably help you learn Italian faster. They are very similar from what I remember.
Well Jack..its my downfall at times..Sometimes, I take it out on the wrong people..If I could just think for that extra minute longer..before unleasing the fury..it might help.
lets hope I get to that stage sometime soon. Its funny because when I do unleash the fury, people usually say don't burn all your bridges at once..you never know when you might need to cross them again, and I am like "Do I look remotely bothered"!
Must remain calm, must remain calm, must remain calm..lol..mantra over!..
"people usually say don't burn all your bridges at once.."
I've been told that too and ... well ... I sort of use that phrase in my own life because I don't want to burn all my bridges ... especially now at this point in my life. Oh the other hand, it's hard for me not to say what I want to say when I'm angry. Haha, however, there is a time to "vent" and a time to just "stop, take a deep breath and walk away."

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