Seeking some insight

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by Asana Spirit on Thursday, July 9, 2015 and has 11 replies.
Several months ago I met a Capricorn male on tinder. We chatted back and forth but nothing of a sexual or overtly flirtatious nature. Just good banter. The conversation stopped mainly because I wasn't on Tinder much. Two months ago I started a new job. A couple of weeks in I get a message from him asking how I am. I thought this was a bit out of the blue but replied saying I had a new job. He replied that he thought that was me wandering around the building lol as it turns out he also works at the same place, albeit in a different area. The conversation started up again, and we would see each other around work and smile and say a quick hello. I found that the level of initiation was fairly balanced and we were texting or seeing each other most days with an element of flirting started to happen. I asked that we text by phone rather than tinder and he gave me his cell phone number. He would text me when he was going for a smoke to come see him, we would text at night. If he had seen me, we would text to say I looked beautiful or sexy, and he always commented on my eyes. I got the feeling that he was interested, and keen to get to know me better. While he was keen not to be seen around work being overly affectionate with me, if we were in the lift together along he would be all over me lol last Friday after work we meet at some local gardens, it was the first time we were alone together with some time on our hands. We mucked around a bit, and chattered until he had to go to make a prearranged get together with friends. I felt this was slow and steady progress in the right direction. However, since then he has turned cold, distant, and even somewhat rude. Fhe has not responded to any texts I have sent, which is only one a day and of a general nature, and all compliments regarding me have stopped completely. He will talk to me when we bump into each other at work, which hasn.t been often this week, but it is mundane stuff like how is your day, how are you coping with that work issue, then he is off. On one occasion, we were in the lift together alone and he pulled me close for a hug, but then his floor arrived. I worked late one night and he come down to my floor to chat to some other people he knew, he knew I was there and it was like he wanted to see where I was and wanted me to see him
I text him when I was free to say I'd meet him for a smoke but was ignored. What the hell has gone wrong for this Capricorn?
I should add that he was promoted to a senior position this week, and has been doing two roles. When I have asked after him, he has said he is stressed and busy. I understand that work and achievement in the work space is vital to a Capricorn...
Posted by Asana Spirit
I should add that he was promoted to a senior position this week, and has been doing two roles. When I have asked after him, he has said he is stressed and busy. I understand that work and achievement in the work space is vital to a Capricorn...

Hmmmm....Yes that is true of Caps, but it's still no reason to be RUDE....even if he's extremely busy with his new position. I know a little about CAP men...been with one for 29 .5 years and 27.5 years of those are in marriage. They can be very challenging with their Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde personalities, but Cap men are like Taurus men. When they really like you, you will know it. I say back away and if he's interested and you still want to be involved with him WHEN HE DOES COME AROUND...if he comes around, then see what happens. In the meantime, DO NOT text, call or initiate any contact towards him. If you happen to run into him at work, just speak and keep it moving. BTW, what is your sign?
Posted by Gobshite
Tinder is largely for the immature, unfaithful and idiotic...

I thought it was for hookups and easy sex.....I really have no idea, though, to be honest.
Well, normally, a cap would have second thoughts about messing around at the office. Plus, he just got promoted so there may be rules to fraternization at work that go with his new position.

I agree, no need to be rude, but he just isn't interested in persuing anything right now and is hoping you'll get the hint.
Posted by truecap
Well, normally, a cap would have second thoughts about messing around at the office. Plus, he just got promoted so there may be rules to fraternization at work that go with his new position.

I agree, no need to be rude, but he just isn't interested in persuing anything right now and is hoping you'll get the hint.

^^^This.
Thanks for your comments. Yes, I found Tinder was predominantly for hook ups and as a result deleted my profile. We both laughed that it really wasn't for us for that reason.

Up until we got intimate, not sex, but intimate, I absolutely knew he was interested! Not just through texts but also through actions. He even asked me to keep a couple of days in mind later this month when he would be at a course close to where I live and could come and stay the night. He would make the time and create opportunities to see me at work despite being busy.

It has been radio silence since we went our seperate ways after being intimate. Given Caps tend to only let you in and get close when they decide they like you and feel safe with you, I'm struggling with the total change in attitude. Yes, absolutely he may not wish to pursue me anymore, and I get that.

I'm a Leo.
I am a Leo, and well aware that I'm a person who likes to know what's going on and preferrably right now lol knowing this I am mindful not to push people on things that they may require time to process or think about. Other than letting him know I think he is handsome (after he told me constant reassurance from me was a good thing) and responding to his compliments and physical touch, I have not pushed him in any way. He pursued me, I avoided it for quite some time, but eventually decided to see where things went. I struggle with the complete 360 in his behaviour and lack of response to texts. I just saw him at work a little while ago, and he smiled at me (his big eye smile) and waved. Neither of us could stop as we had people with us, so I just gave him a big smile back. Before he would have sent me a text after to say I looked great etc but that has stopped now.
Seems odd that he just stopped suddenly. Maybe he's committed to someone now, or he's pulling back because you're at work. However, it does seem rude that he just stopped responding. How old is he?
@sunmoonstars there is no one else, and this has really developed since I started working at the same place. We are both in our mid to late 30's. The stress with his role is huge at the moment ( and I know this to be true), and I think that he just isn't able to cope with anyone or anything else at the moment, particularly a reasonably new person in his life which I am. I got a text late this arvo to say things were very tough at the moment, so I need to just be there in the background as a support not a nuisance. If it is meant to develop it will in its own sweet time I guess.
Thank you.