The Secret to Handling a Cap Male?

Posted by cowpuncher
So you want him to totally let down his guard to YOU and be vulnerable to YOU, as you date other guys?
Good luck. lol

Posted by M
Long story short: I haven't dated enough Cap men to know if this is the "secret" to handling a Cap male, but for THIS Cap male having other guys in the picture has really straightened him up quick! I am LOVING it, as he is acting EXACTLY as he should have from Day One.
It's not. Sounds closer to a guy's action/reaction thing than a Capism. Caps are possesive to a degree, but this scenario doesn't mix well.
So, I hope this helps some of you out there. I keep reading the sad, confused posts of women involved with these guys, and I can totally relate to most of them. These guys are very DIFFERENT so somewhat "hard" to figure out. Maybe you should date other guys and figure out a way for him to "accidentally find out" about it? It just may help... (???)
Advocating game playing has the highest risk of blowing up in their faces though. Some people are gifted in knowing where to push or grease the wheels but they are the exception, not the rule.
Most probably don't want to catch an uber paranoid/jealous Cap Either :p Avoid that type of Cap + a healthy dose of hard-to-get will go over so much better than trying to capitalize on jealousy. We'd probably be turned off by the latter and feel you are looking to play fast and loose :p

Posted by pinkkk
Why do you date other guys if you like cap? What made you decide to date other people while dating him even though he said he is not dating anyone else?
From what I understand, cap men are competitive so it may be that he is acting the way you want because he wants to 'win', but then when he has you he may remember at some point that you were dating other guys at the same time and get worried you didnt like him enough not to exclusively date him or question your loyalty and then be distant again.
His change in behaviour may not be permanent and just a result of his competitiveness. Also the fact that he told you he wasn't dating other people means he probably wasnt and may really really like you but shy which you interpreted as cold.

Posted by cowpuncher
I think you are taking my comment out of context. For one thing, unless you've made a commitment, you do NOT have a commitment. See other people as you see fit and that's your business, I do the very same thing until I am ready to commit to somebody, and expect them to do the same.
However, I think you're going to find there are limits to how much that guy is willing to open up to you until you are both exclusive. Maybe those limits will acceptable to you and maybe they will not, but limts - I promise you - there will be, until there's some commitment and trust there.
Anything beyond that you are seeing in my comment didn't come from me, so maybe it would be productive to think about where that came from?
Again - If you want him to totally open up to you, while you are seeing other people... good luck. Maybe it could happen, but beyond some limits you are probably not going to like... I doubt it.

Posted by TigerCap
[quote]He isn't possessive by any stretch. (I differentiate between "jealousy" and "possessiveness;" I am jealous WHEN I CARE
but am NOT possessive).[/quote]
Yup, very recognisable. I do get jealous, even though I don't want to. I will not however get possesive all that fast. If the girl wants to test me or play with me then by all means go ahead. I will DEFINITELY feel pangs of jealousy if I see her talking, dancing or kissing with another guy. I will not however be played like that. Go ahead and play, I will find someone else. Besides, if she isn't strong enough to take care of herself without me then she is also not someone I am interested in.
Other than that; show me that you are part of a game, a competition I can win, but don't try to play me. If i ever realize you did you have a pissed/cold Tigercap on your hands.
You got lucky that it happened and he responded like should. But please dont make it part of your strategy.

Posted by twinklebluetoes
His Moon and Venus sign will be more important than his sun sign.
But in general, Capricorns don't like insincerity and your actions might have come across as insincere. You could have called him on his shit and simply not brought another person into the equation.
He might have acted jealous but Capricorns are very slow to make decisions. He will ponder this later and might come to a completely different conclusion than "I want to be exclusive with her", he could just simply think that it's not worth putting more effort into you. They are very practical and when something rocks the boat too much and leaves them in a position to get hurt, they often would rather just let it go.
Of course it depends on his chart, like I said.

Posted by M
I don't see this as a game at all. For one thing, I've been completely honest with him. We have no exclusivity understanding whatsoever, and in fact I thought he was dating other women as well (he says that he isn't).
My focus was your advocating others to play them. I'm not so much vested in your comings and goings.
He isn't possessive by any stretch. (I differentiate between "jealousy" and "possessiveness;" I am jealous WHEN I CARE
but am NOT possessive).
I made that distinction as well, and said that trying to exploit our propensity to be possessive was not the way to go. And did so not focusing on what someone else should walk away with...see above.
But, you raise a good point about the broad mix of Cap men out there. Some may act unpredictably to this situation.
Most won??t go for that. You have a guy with a personality type and a sign with certain characteristics??_but given the scenario it??s not a great cross reference to pass on to others. It??s not a case of : ???he is a Cap therefore??_?? even if outwardly scenarios run similar. Like Pinkk said with competitive which ties in with what I was saying about even if it did work for someone it only lasts as long as the manipulation does.
BTW, I am LMAO at the negative reactions from the Cap men on here! You guys DO NOT LIKE this post/thread -- for OBVIOUS reasons.
There??s a reason for the negative reception but you can??t see the real one because you??ve already decided on one. Then to follow it up by putting it on us??_ makes me think you??ve been adding things up wrong and aren't a very good listener. Consensus on this may vary, but is pointed in the same direction.

Posted by Caplove
You guys, she didn't make him jealous on purpose, he did that himself. It just happened. Yes, it was unfortunate but she did not plan it like that.
Anyone who plays games with people (not just Capricorns) won't get far, and I think the people that come here are smart enough to know this on their own. It will backfire. Everyone just has to be themselves and what happens happens.
She is confident and assertive and put her foot down on his bad behavior on an earlier post. Every woman and man is not the same. Not all Caps are the same. If a woman is willing to say "see ya buddy," and not think twice about it, then she gets rid of the commitment-phobic/never were interested men really fast before anyone gets attached OR he realizes that he needs to shape up if he wants to win her heart.
A woman has the power to say "no, that's not going to work for me, your behavior is rude.. there's the door and don't let it hit you on your way out," and be willing to happily walk away. There is nothing wrong with having standards.
If a woman doesn't make the guy her everything and lets him know she has a life of her own, he'll realize that he has to actually work for her and behave like a proper gentleman should. If he's not up for it, then he'll leave, plain and simple. That's the process, he weeds himself out and does her a big favor.
So what if she's dating other people? They are not even in a committed relationship yet. They've only been on a few dates. If he wants that, then he needs to step up to the plate and work for it like the man he is, plain and simple.