To let Capman love me more....

I have relationship with cap man, for more than 1-year, but we were on and off, but now we are okay...im under cancer zodiac sign. During those days i've never been good girlfriend to him, i always sulked or nagged on him, if lied to me for whatever reasoned...But lately, i've changed i tried to understand his situation more and to have more patient...will he notice it——and what would he think?...I want to get his attention more and love me more ... anyone can help me?

I feel for you girl. Sometimes it feels like sulking and nagging are the only way to get through and frankly game playing isn't really kind to the heart. I have a couple qs, Does he love you? Does he do little things that show he cares about you? Ok, if we can estalish he loves you, then you can think about talking with him about trying to reach him. I have had several great talks with my cappy where I tell him how much I feel for him, and how it hurts me when he turns from hot to cold to hot, very confusing etc. He doesn't always react in the nicest way, usually its a cold/directness BUT later he will show that he has heard me and he will be more attentive (this usually only lasts for a couple days).

Basically as sad as it sounds I don't really think these guys come around, they are always pretty darn self-centered, thinking about their own deeps thoughts, so either grin and bare it or walk-away...

wheretomylady---thank for the advice,as what he wants me to believe that he loves me. But i keep on telling him that he doesn't love me. Sometimes, he is telling me that i have to understand him, he had so many things to attend of. Yes, i can love him more and i can understand him more, but i have this fear in myself, if i show it all then theres nothing left for myself! and he would take advantage of it, because he is not promising me anything..
Before, during our first fight, he offer me a marriage! But it was my mistake i did not accept, because his conditions was to forget my attention to my family and social like friends life. He tried to offer me business, i screwed it also.
Now i just don't know how to get back his trust and love to me.

"during our first fight, he offer me a marriage! But it was my mistake i did not accept, because his conditions was to forget my attention to my family and social like friends life. He tried to offer me business, i screwed it also.
Now i just don't know how to get back his trust and love to me."

Your scre*wed.
What kind of guy places a condition like "forget my attention to my family and social like friends life". Does he want a wife or a pet animal to control. I sure think u are better off without him. Lead ur own life and forget him for the time being-if ur love is meant to be;he will be back with marriage and more.

Bittertaurus-- To forget my attention to my family and friends,that was before. But now, he changed. Everytime, i talked about my family he does appreciates, and he even one me to buy some gifts for my family.

my feeling is, having dealt with the issue of telling someone you love them and they don't believe you, is that you don't love yourself enough to believe that someone would love you as much as a capricorn does, and believe me when we say we love you with the amount of depth to offer marriage, we LOVE you, and our intention is real. if you're getting the friends or family issue, i would say you're not paying enough attention to the relationship in general, or to the extent, or depth that the cap is. when that happens, we turn off, and poof. fear and doubt make deep relationships un-doable. elvis, the big capricorn, (and i'm not a big fan, but), he even sang a song about it, "suspicious minds". "we can't go on together, with suspicious minds".
you know, it just destroys the bond, the trust, the love. i would say you're screwed, because you plced the seed of doubt in the cap's head, instead of faith in his heart. also, if you continue to tell him that he doesn't love you, eventually he won't. that's the seed you're planting. i don't know what you want to accomplish with that statement, other then him leaving you. maybe you don't want him to love you in the first place. think about it.

"Does he do little things that show he cares about you?"

What do you ladies consider little things from a CAP?

Bringing an 8 dollar bottle of wine, some candy, a hallmark card?

When I was with my cap he spent MONEY on me, I am talking about seafood dinners, going out to eat, going to the warf and me getting what ever I wanted beit, lobester, crabs, red snappers, etc, my ex cap would spend over 100.00 on dinner alone for us to eat at home, and more when we went out to eat.

He supplied the drinks and everything when I used to come and see him.

He gave me money basically every day for my lunch, know that is showing that he cared for me and I knew it, and I did the same for him. If I wanted him to fix dinner for me I would ask and he would say what do you want to eat and go get it.

"He used to tell me that he don't know what I want unless I tell him"?

I took that to heart and anything I wanted I asked for it and basically got it.


I find it hard to want to except little cheap things from a man that loves nice things, dinner, clothes, etc. Cap or no Cap if you ladies like the little cheap things that your cap gives or brings to you, I really think you should expect more from them, because if you don't then they will continue to play you CHEAP.

I sort of agree with you 'Oh wise scorpio lady', but sometimes my cappy just brings me a bag of my favorite chips, other times he buys me a really great meal or a thoughtful gift, I feel that its the meaning attached to things that matter more, it shows he knows my needs and understands me. Heck I can buy myself a fancy meal but there isn't a lot of wholesome feeling there, I would rather my cap involve me in his 'deep' thoughts than simply take out his pocket book.

As for trying to win back the heart of a capricorn, tough stuff, these guys take things pretty darn serious. I think they may only be able to love once maybe twice in a lifetime...I guess just have a nice heart to heart and let him know that you realy care about him, and want him in your life for reasons a,b, and c (I think cappys like to hear about their good attributes because they are so hard on themselves). There is nothing the matter with putting yourself out there and being open...however, too many deep serious talks might drive cappy mad, or any man for that matter, so try to be patient, and give yourselves some space. Just work on being friends and go from there...

CapGal

I have experience so many wonderful things with my ex,as for gold digging if you would have read what I wrote, "I did the same for him" so before you come on the board assumeing, you might want to make sure that what you read is write.

Know my ex has done it all friends, kissing in front of friends dinner, holding hands any and all that a man would do I know he loved me then and he loves me know and I love him also.

I walked away from the relationship because of his lack of communication, I don't chase, plea for no man, I don't force no man to talk to me see me or allow them to treat me the way capmen treat women I can only be grateful to myself that I found out about his ways early enough not to come on this board and sound desparete like most of the women come here and sound.

I have gotten in this converstation with other women on this and I will not go into it again, not with you or anyone else. I will occasional speak my mind if I choose and if it brothers you then, then go to another board.

Capgirl: answer to the following questions.
Is he attentive to you when you're out together, or does he ignore you, while his eyes wander around constantly? Does he introduce you to his friends and invite you to hang with them? Does he wrap his arms completely around you when he hugs you and look in your eyes? Everything is YES..

Scorpionlady:
Your right, the problem is lack of communication. Like you don't know where to stand or what you have to do...to call him several times no answer no messages...But if you stop calling him maximum a week, he will ask why your not calling me? is he nuts!
****Actually i hate it...but still i have to understand him(the nuts cap in him!).