Gemini man messed me about for 5 YEARS!

Hey i really need some advice on this, i really ready to walk away once and for all.
It started five years ago where me and this gem man had been mates for 3 years before, so ive known him for 8 years of my life and we have grown up together through our teens into our 20's. Im 20 and hes 23. In the beginning he chased and chased and would even cry because i wouldnt go out with him, he'd ring me EVERYDAY with out fail and would always want to see me, i finally agreed to go out with him thinking hed treat me good and then once he had me he flipped, he slept with a girl a month into our relationship (which i didnt find out about until we ended) he hardly never called, would always rather be with his mates than me and was always blowing hot and cold saying he loved me so much and we were going to get married one day, im his best mate, the best girlfriend rah rah rah, then the next week he'd be like oh i dont no if i love you anymore. In the end my brother caught him pulling sum random girl in a night club. I did everything for him being a scorpio. I used to pick him up at 3 am from clubs, make him cd's. lend him money, help him if his car broke down, got him jobs, everything. When we broke up we ended up sleeping together and he'd cheat on every girlfriend he had saying that they didnt compare to me and i was amazing but he just didnt want a relationship. Everytime i got in a relationship with another guy he'd come mess it up n id cheat on them with him, something thats not in my nature. Its like if we are in the same place we just get drawn to eachother. i always tell myself i have to end it all, but i love him so much its like i cant, i never think its really over cos he always comes back. we went out a second time in November which lasted 7 months then he said he got bored and wanted to sleep with other girls, but then he comes back n sleeps with me again saying he loves me and misses me but doesnt want a relationship. i do everything for him and hes so selfish, its all him him him and i feel if i spend longer than a day with him he just gets bored. he was also writing to girls who hate me a month before we broke up aswell. i dont understand how he can say he 'loves me' and always comes back to me when hes with other girls when he can be so mean?

also have a gemini friend and she'll say she hang out with me and when i get round to calling her to meet up she just doesnt answer her phone, i always pick her up and give her lifts, lend her money, help get her a job, and then she'll just go off radar for days and not answer her phone, geminis just seem so slefish, all i do is give give give and all they want to do is take take take. shes a flirt and you no what, she even PULLED the guy im talking about before 2 days after i went on holiday and he was going on about how he was still in love with me and we'll go bk out when i get bk, she was going on about how i was her best mate and she'll miss me, then them to end up pulling! its so unfair im just sick of geminis, all you do is hurt people and think of yourselves 😢

also the girls arse lick you to your face, then run behind your back spreading shit about you and telling all your secrets!!! they are so fake and superficial and scorpios hate that! urgh i need to vent!! i mean i go clubbing with her and as soon as my backs turn shes humping my exes leg, then another time shes leaning down into my exes car with the shortest hoody with the zip down far enough showing all her cleavage, i come over she runs over to me going 'oh im not wearing any bra, and no knickers either' WTF?? flirting, two-faced cheating wankers. And me just being the nice scorpio i am just tries to help them both. im changing my number so the fuckers can not get to me again!

so should i just ignore him? or will that just make him want me more? will he ever change? does he actually love me or is he using me?

I was treated the same way by a sag guy, and as a friend a leo girl, I think it may just be the people you are surrounding yourself with and not so much the sign, and you should just forget about them. I personally have NEVER cheated on a boyfriend nor would I ever, and I am fortunate to say that I have at the least five girlfriends whom I have been friends with for 20+ years and it's because I am loyal and listen. I am usually the first person my friends call if they need anything; whether it be a ride, $ 10 or a shoulder to cry on. I don't go out of my way to hurt anyone and can't understand why anyone would, but it's happened to all of us, just pick yourself up, detach yourself from them and move on.

yeah your right, i think its a self eestem issue aswell, where i know what theyve done is bad but i just seem to forgive them after awhile, spesh with my ex, he'd do really horrible things and i would just forgive him after he said a few nice things and tickled me and said stop being grumps. He would never remember when i had a job interview and would never let me discuss my feelings, i just find it hard to open up and trust people i guess, but thanx again x

It's not easy to trust anyone once someone has broken it, but you learn that trust isn't something that is given but earned. I say write them off and keep your chin up, you'll meet someone someday that will be worth your time and trust, and if you keep forgiving people like that over and over, they'll walk all over you since ya pretty much are saying it's ok by forgiving them. I can understand forgiving maybe once, but for me if you cross me twice I just have time for you after that and take it as a lesson learned.

"don't" have time for them after that, I meant to say...sorry typo

its true, so hard because when they are being nice they r lovely and i can tell my gemini everything and she'll just listen and let me vent. And i really felt that what i had with my ex was so special and id never meet n e one like him, but i no theres so many ppl out there and i just have to wait till the day i do meet 'the one' and he wont make me cry x

"so should i just ignore him?" - yes

"or will that just make him want me more?" - probably, but the longer you stand your ground the less he will want anything to do with you.. it won't be easy..

"will he ever change?" - ppl always change. it really depends on their life lessons. some ppl get it quicker than others. but, it doesn't really matter if he changes or not, right now, he is toxic and negative and that is something that no one needs in their life. asking if he's going to change, is just fooling yourself into keeping that door open for him to walk in and all over you any time he wants..

"does he actually love me or is he using me?" - based on what you have said, he only loves himself and everyone else is disposable. he is using you when he comes back and woos you. he's just trying to get what he wants and you give it to him every time... time to just walk away...

be strong and stand up for what you believe in. i wish you the best of luck!! 🙂

thank you your so right,i find that people always ask for advice when they are just hiding from the answer they already know and just want to hear the one they want even tho they know its wrong for them. But i know and i do feel like ive had the wool taken from over my eyes. From reading this forum and reading what people have said about gemini men it sounds so much like him and i just no we arent compatible and meant to be so its reallly helped, just be interesting to see what happens when he finally does call (probs wanting sex) and hopefully ill be strong enough not to answer x

*not meant to be

all gems are not like that....and your boyfriend seems young and immature and really doesnt know what he wants at this point. you are young too so have fun with your life.

Next time he wants to get together tell him no...you are busy...and leave it at that. Make yourself scarce for a while.

i didnt walk into it eyes wide open. i would try ignoring him, get another boyfriend, and then he would say how hes changed, say how he loves me, say how we are soul mates and no other girl compares to me, how he thinks about me all the time. If someones telling you all this then your going to think oh he does love me deep down, he would say stuff like we would get back together, how he just wants to cuddle me, how hes in love with me, and i find it hard to trust people and let people in so i always felt comfort and stability with him so always went back. Now i realize everything he said was just gemini charm bullshit and i cant wait for him to ring me in a few weeks time wanting sex so i can go GO AWAY!

Posted by scorpiokirst
i didnt walk into it eyes wide open. i would try ignoring him, get another boyfriend, and then he would say how hes changed, say how he loves me, say how we are soul mates and no other girl compares to me, how he thinks about me all the time. If someones telling you all this then your going to think oh he does love me deep down, he would say stuff like we would get back together, how he just wants to cuddle me, how hes in love with me, and i find it hard to trust people and let people in so i always felt comfort and stability with him so always went back. Now i realize everything he said was just gemini charm bullshit and i cant wait for him to ring me in a few weeks time wanting sex so i can go GO AWAY!

Gems test boundaries and as long as you keep giving in... he knows he can get away with it. Like your plan to ignore him, he'll see through that. He knows you'll capitulate eventually. You already know he's still got a lot of maturing to do (which you obviously can't help him with) so just walk away with self-respect and dignity and if he comes back, grown up like you want him to be, and you still like him, then give it another shot.

I don't think you can do anything now to change him. He will change and grow up when he's ready. So you can waste your time waiting around for that to happen or make the most of your life now with someone who could be better suited to you.

Good luck.

Thanks LadyLibra, I try to be positive most of the time lol