Hi I'm Marmotini

This topic was created in the Gemini forum by Marmotini on Saturday, March 9, 2013 and has 62 replies.
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Let me tell you a little about myself!
I have worked as a professional writer and editor, after working for several years in Las Vegas as an exotic dancer and fetish model, and am currently in sales and studying massage. I'm thinking about getting certified in reiki later this month.
I take vinyasa flow yoga, and also practice yin yoga. I just did a work-shop last week in Santa Monica.
The beach is my favorite place besides yoga class and my bed, and I want to live in California for the rest of my life, but travel more.
I'm not originally from CA, I grew up in the South, and have traveled over the U.S. and Canada, but would also like to go to Europe, far East Asia, Russia, and maybe South America eventually.
I'm a completely non-violent individual, I believe in gun control, and I've never stalked anyone in my life.
I have indulged in some Internet trolling, because I have a warped sense of humor, and a profound sense of honesty and social justice.
In Enneagram I am what is known as 4-6-8 "Truth Teller" or "Canary in the Coal Mine" who values authenticity, fairness, and direct assertive methods.
I'm eccentric, and I'm certainly not for everyone, but I'm generally a pretty nice person, though I don't mind if strangers on the Internet think I'm this or that, I still don't like to be accused falsely of crimes by a major troll whose character can be verified by multiple people.
My own personal issues include: over-sensitivity and reactivity, occasional emotional outbursts, and some codependent tendencies. I don't claim to be perfect, but I'm not evil or dangerous.
I do enjoy horror movies though, and true crime documentaries. I also take a lot of walks, enjoy cooking, am obsessed with music (of all kinds, but I love New Wave, classic rock, Synth pop, emo, electronica, and some alternative the most).
So hi. Feel free to ask me anything, and I'll actually tell you the truth.
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Posted by geminintheworld
Hi there Marmotini,
Sounds like you live a very interesting life.
Beautiful introduction. I have some questions, just out of curiosity.
- What prompted you to write that introduction?

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Thanks!! If you're asking why I started with "what I do" maybe it's just because of how my mind works, like introducing what my role is in the world before getting into more personal details.
If you're asking what prompted me to write the entire thing, it's because I realize that a lot of people here don't know me at all, and may have a really silly and unrealistic view of who I am, and I wanted to be clear that I'm probably not what they've perceived from tiny brief dramatic posts.
- Where do you wish to travel? Specific countries? You only really mentioned continents.


Ahhh...England, Ireland, France, Italy, Russia, Germany, Argentina, Japan and China.
- Just noticed you have a capricorn moon, bet that gives you a funny/witty/dry sense of humour. I have a friend with the gem sun/moon cap combination. I think it would be awesome, a perfect mix of eclecticism and discipline? Do you find that or not? I can only go from my observation of one person so am interested in your experience of this combo. Also do you get in those really dark depressed states? My friend does, how do you pull yourself back out, if you do experience that? If that is too personal a question no need to answer.
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Hahah...yeah something like that. People tend to think of me as reserved and icy on the surface, but very nice when they get to know me. My emotional outbursts usually only come out around people who know me well, or on-line (because it's more "inside my head" I suppose) because IRL I tend to kind of be quiet or keep to myself, but then get to know me and I'm pretty talkative and yeah I can be really ecclectic. And eccentric. And kinda crazy!
Yes, I do get into really dark depressed states. I've always identified with my Cap moon and Scorp ascendent as much as my Gemini sun.
And apparently Scorpio is actually pretty heavy in my chart, giving me an emotional intensity.
How do I pull myself out? Wow that's a pretty deep question. Haha. I meditate and do yoga, and sun and exercise tend to help me a lot. Being more balanced and active, but I tend to really have to "work through things" as a process. Talkin
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Posted by geminintheworld
Hi there Marmotini,
Sounds like you live a very interesting life.
Beautiful introduction. I have some questions, just out of curiosity.
- What prompted you to write that introduction?

.
Thanks!! If you're asking why I started with "what I do" maybe it's just because of how my mind works, like introducing what my role is in the world before getting into more personal details.
If you're asking what prompted me to write the entire thing, it's because I realize that a lot of people here don't know me at all, and may have a really silly and unrealistic view of who I am, and I wanted to be clear that I'm probably not what they've perceived from tiny brief dramatic posts.
- Where do you wish to travel? Specific countries? You only really mentioned continents.


Ahhh...England, Ireland, France, Italy, Russia, Germany, Argentina, Japan and China.
- Just noticed you have a capricorn moon, bet that gives you a funny/witty/dry sense of humour. I have a friend with the gem sun/moon cap combination. I think it would be awesome, a perfect mix of eclecticism and discipline? Do you find that or not? I can only go from my observation of one person so am interested in your experience of this combo. Also do you get in those really dark depressed states? My friend does, how do you pull yourself back out, if you do experience that? If that is too personal a question no need to answer.
click to expand


Hahah...yeah something like that. People tend to think of me as reserved and icy on the surface, but very nice when they get to know me. My emotional outbursts usually only come out around people who know me well, or on-line (because it's more "inside my head" I suppose) because IRL I tend to kind of be quiet or keep to myself, but then get to know me and I'm pretty talkative and yeah I can be really ecclectic. And eccentric. And kinda crazy!
Yes, I do get into really dark depressed states. I've always identified with my Cap moon and Scorp ascendent as much as my Gemini sun.
And apparently Scorpio is actually pretty heavy in my chart, giving me an emotional intensity.
How do I pull myself out? Wow that's a pretty deep question. Haha. I meditate and do yoga, and sun and exercise tend to help me a lot. Being more balanced and active, but I tend to really have to "work through things" as a process. Talkin
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nd do yoga, and sun and exercise tend to help me a lot. Being more balanced and active, but I tend to really have to "work through things" as a process. Talking to people about it and sometimes acting out, but working on that. Trying.
- What was it like working as a professional writer? Why did you change direction?


At first I was happy because I majored in English Lit, but it wasn't creative writing, my real love, so eventually I actually felt very stressed, bored, put-upon and isolated from other people, like I was on my computer way too much, especially combined with my interest in on-line forums, it ended up being kind of bad for me emotionally.
I feel a lot better since I leave the house to do a more physically active job, and my love of writing returned when I didn't feel like I "had to" do it.
Also I wasn't making enough money.
- What was it like working as an exotic dancer and fetish model? I briefly dabbled in the world of Burlesque but it wasn't for me, fun for a little bit though.


Super fun at times, especially dancing. It got old after several years, though. I loved being on stage, and I think I used my natural Gemini charm to win over customers (still do that, in a different way) ...I love performing and I liked the money, but the "sex industry" gets tiring, I don't know how people can even psychologically handle becoming porn stars.
- You are the only person i have heard state that they like emo music. Interesting. Have you ever read Hey! Nietzsche! Leave Them Kids Alone! by Craig Schuftan. It uncovers the roots of emo and relates it to movements in rock music previously and also in the romantic movement of the 1800s, actually even manages to find some influence from cabaret. Its interesting, I actually wanted it to be better than it was but nevertheless its a worthy read just not mind blowing.
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I want to read it. Yes, I like emo, because showing vulnerable emotions like love, longing, sadness, despair, and even things like obsession and clinical depression was necessary in our time period, because soft and negative emotions, besides anger, were being repressed in society.
Like punk was the result of anger and primal behavior being repressed in society, and I think emo is my generations social version of punk, except to embrace vulnerability and emotion instead of always trying to be tough, angry, nihilistic, or rational.
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- Do you David Bowie?


Yes. I love David Bowie. I really like a lot of his music, and I had a crush on him when I was a little girl in the 1980s.
- Do you play a musical instrument?


I play a little piano, I took lessons for several years, but have always been more of a singer. I sang all through school in choirs and choral competitions, sang in church choirs as well, and was in a garage band as a vocalist and lyricist in high school.
My father was a serious musician. He and my mother traveled with his band when they were first married, before I was born, He also liked writing. I'm like the opposite of him, I was better at writing, but loved music, while he was better at music and loved writing.
Take care of your thumbs when massaging. My sister was a remedial masseuse but her technique was obviously not great and she ended up damaging her thumbs. I love the friend of mine that has the gemini sun and capricorn moon combination its like eclecticism and discipline and

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Ah, okay thanks for the tip!!
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Posted by geminintheworld
Do you like david bowie?
Sorry about the typos


Haha hey no problem you're so cool, thanks for being interested and asking questions, they were fun to answer.
So tell me about you. What are you into?
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Wow I just love the way you described yourself, you're awesome. I also relate to you in a way.
Are you an ENFP or xSFP by any chance in MBTI?
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Posted by geminintheworld
I am not sure. How do i find out? What are you?


I am an ISFP.
There's lots of tests you can take on-line.
http://16typequiz.com/quiz.html
http://cognitivequiz.com/quiz.html
There's a couple.
I can find more. Lots more!
Then you compare types, read, and decide which one fits you best.
I like Best Fit Type and PTypes for reading.
You can also read Keirsey's "Please Understand Me II"
Or Jung's original Psychological Types, but that's typically for people more "into" personality theory, it's like the deep end of the pool.
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Posted by geminintheworld
....also that video clip + remix is AWESOME!!



Glad you liked it!
Do you like any classic rock?
Here's a few of the ones I like:
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I love this album cover:
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OMG I LOVE LITTLE RIVER BAND!!!!
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That's so awesome. I like NEVER meet Little River Band fans. Good stuff. You're cool.
smile
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Staged? LOL NO.
I was just hanging out and chatting.
I've never spoken with her before, so it's not a planned interview.
That's pretty funny!
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smile
I took a bath just now with a Lush buffy bar, they have exfoliator and moisturizer in them, and it smells soooo good!
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OHAIGUYZ!!!!
**big random hugs**
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where's those jugs
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Posted by HouseCleaning
where's those jugs



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damn it those jugs are there
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tee hee!!!!
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Hiya yourself!
No I'm not dating a narcissist.
I was talking about someone from my recent past.
I've actually been seeing a very nice, polite, good-in-bed, honest but FLAKY AS FUCK Aquarius lately.
I'm not really sure I have the stomach for this after having a Libra FWB for about a year before I started seeing him. There was some overlap, I met Aquarius while still had Libra FWB, but didn't actually hook up with Aquarius until after Libra was really really over.
I really like Aquarius a lot, we're closer in age, both in our early 30s and we are both writers, and we're even from the same part of the country but moved to live in the area we live now.
But he's really flaky. He keeps saying he doesn't want to get serious, now he says he's not sure he's over his ex-gf from like eight or nine months ago, and...
I don't think I can take much more of him doing this. I have a feeling he'll be back soon, but if he isn't ready to get more serious when he returns, I can't go back to him.
Then I guess I'll just be alone. He's not a narcissist, though. I think he means well.
I think?
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In fact what I've realized is that I'm really sick of people who aren't over their exes or a person they were in love with.
I had the Libra FWB in the first place because I was in love with this Capricorn, and having a FWB seemed like the best thing for me to do, and the Libra also was in love with someone else, so it was a mutual comfort thing at first, then it got really messy, and it ended probably later than it should have.
Then Aquarius didn't tell me until just two days that the reason he didn't want to get serious and move slow and all this is because of HIS EX.
I am so sick of people's exes, and people not ready to move on.
I am ready to move on and I want to be with someone who is also ready to move on. WITH ME.
Even the Capricorn I had the unfortunate attachment was always not over someone, and I don't think I was completely over my six year Libra ex when I first started talking to him.
It's all a bunch of bullshit.
I want a clean slate. I want someone else with a clean slate.
I'm sick of people's past attachments, and I'm done with my own.
I think people are a reflection of where we are at in our lives, especially the person we spend the most time with or are sleeping with, those people are mirrors for our own issues.
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I love this song.
The video, not so much.
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French 80's music:
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Bat for Lashes doing Depeche Mode:
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Why thank you! That is so sweet.
I think my Capricorn moon makes me a little caustic, though.
What's your moon?
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Posted by geminicandlelight
Posted by Marmotini
Hiya yourself!
No I'm not dating a narcissist.
I was talking about someone from my recent past.
I've actually been seeing a very nice, polite, good-in-bed, honest but FLAKY AS FUCK Aquarius lately.
I'm not really sure I have the stomach for this after having a Libra FWB for about a year before I started seeing him. There was some overlap, I met Aquarius while still had Libra FWB, but didn't actually hook up with Aquarius until after Libra was really really over.
I really like Aquarius a lot, we're closer in age, both in our early 30s and we are both writers, and we're even from the same part of the country but moved to live in the area we live now.
But he's really flaky. He keeps saying he doesn't want to get serious, now he says he's not sure he's over his ex-gf from like eight or nine months ago, and...
I don't think I can take much more of him doing this. I have a feeling he'll be back soon, but if he isn't ready to get more serious when he returns, I can't go back to him.
Then I guess I'll just be alone. He's not a narcissist, though. I think he means well.
I think?



So, what is your ultimate goal? To get serious with someone as in getting married?
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Yes, I think I want to be married. I at least want to live with someone in a committed partnership again.
I've had enough of casual affairs and FWB and rebounds and weird Internet relationships; I also need to make sure my karma is good so I'm not dragging it into my next relationship.
I think we all end up attracting people who reflect either our karma OR lessons we need to learn, whether we like it or not.
Sometimes it's not because we did anything "wrong" or hurt anyone, but because we haven't moved past certain things ourselves, so it will keep showing up in our face until we get it.
I also am not sure it's about not rushing into physical relationships, everyone is always advising about not getting physically involved too quickly, that doesn't prevent love or emotional entanglements from happening.
Sorry, I'm going on about this, I feel like I'm at some really great turning point.
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Posted by geminicandlelight
Posted by Marmotini
Why thank you! That is so sweet.
I think my Capricorn moon makes me a little caustic, though.
What's your moon?


Crazy Leo! Bad combo in my opinion.
It's just that I know people with your sun/moon combo who are brilliant, that is all.
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Why is it bad?
My bff from high school is a Leo.
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I think having Gemini sun with a Cap moon and Scorp asc actually makes me a rather ambivalent or strange person, because I can be very fixed and intense, and I long for security, but I also have this incredible need for freedom; it also seems like all the wrong people don't trust me.
I'm not sure that the Aquarius trusts me. I think that's why he brought up his ex, but it's the silliest thing, because complete strangers trust me, just yesterday at the beach a man asked me to watch his drums for him while he went to go get his bag, he said "hey yoga lady, you look safe."
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I just realized that the Aquarius looks a lot like Kurt Cobain. A better groomed Kurt Cobain. Similar features and piercing blue eyes, though.
That's odd. Why did it just strike me now?
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You can go your own way. Really.
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Really. Really.
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hey baby look no further
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lolol you're so funny...and apparently you'll clean my house, I like that in a man!
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Dear sir:
You're a hot mess.
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Lush is my favorite store in the world, I swear.
This is my new favorite soap that I got today, Figs and Leaves:
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I saw Gatsby in 3D in an amazing theater that served dinner and wine. The Great Gatsby is one of my favorite novels, and these are my favorite two songs from the soundtrack.
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boingy boingy boingy boingy boingy
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Posted by HouseCleaning
boingy boingy boingy boingy boingy


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I've always liked this song, ever since I was a kid I could FEEL the nostalgia in this song, even when I was still too young to really have a deep sense of nostalgia, and I was certainly too young to miss anyone in a romantic way, so this song, even though a pop song really carries the feeling of nostalgia in a very convincing way.
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Hey thanks! Glad you appreciate it.
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Yes synchronicity fo' sho'...that's also a good album!
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No but thanks for posting it so I can have a listen! Hey!
I like his version of "Love is Blindness." I've been grooving on the Gatsby soundtrack lately.
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Posted by DeeGee
FLAGGED!!! Anybody else with me? this narcississtic cray cray needs to check out.....throwing up, all over this thread!


You have no idea what you're talking about.
You sound like you're about 15.
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Oh and just FYI, friend, if you're reading my posts...then you're reading my posts.
Which means YOU are stalking ME.
Don't send dumbasses to do your dirty work. That's just lame.
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