Heaven
This topic was created in the Jokes forum by P-Angel on Friday, April 13, 2007 and has 2 replies.
In Sunday School, the teacher asked the children, "Which part of you gets to Heaven first, the heart or the head."
Tommy's hand immediately started waving in the back of the class.
The teacher pointed to Sara, and she responded with, "I believe it's the head because we have to KNOW that God even exists. It's our brains that know this."
"Very good," the teacher said. Tommy's arm is still waving back and forth, now frantically.
The teacher pointed to Jim, and he responded with, "It's the heart, of course. Loving God is in our hearts, that's where our faith is."
"Excellent," the teacher replied. Tommy is now bouncing in his chair, with both hands waving.
"Yes, Tommy, what is your answer? Is it the head or the heart," the teacher asked.
"Niether," Tommy breathlessly panted out. "It's your feet."
"Your feet," the teacher gasped, in shock. "Why on earth would you think that?"
"Because, I know," Tommy answered matter of factly. "Everytime I walk past my parents bedroom when they are praising God, my mother's feet are raised to the Heavens and she screams, 'Lord I'm coming'. But, I guess dad doesn't want her to go, 'cause he's holding her down."
Tommy's hand immediately started waving in the back of the class.
The teacher pointed to Sara, and she responded with, "I believe it's the head because we have to KNOW that God even exists. It's our brains that know this."
"Very good," the teacher said. Tommy's arm is still waving back and forth, now frantically.
The teacher pointed to Jim, and he responded with, "It's the heart, of course. Loving God is in our hearts, that's where our faith is."
"Excellent," the teacher replied. Tommy is now bouncing in his chair, with both hands waving.
"Yes, Tommy, what is your answer? Is it the head or the heart," the teacher asked.
"Niether," Tommy breathlessly panted out. "It's your feet."
"Your feet," the teacher gasped, in shock. "Why on earth would you think that?"
"Because, I know," Tommy answered matter of factly. "Everytime I walk past my parents bedroom when they are praising God, my mother's feet are raised to the Heavens and she screams, 'Lord I'm coming'. But, I guess dad doesn't want her to go, 'cause he's holding her down."
A farmer had 200 hundred chickens, but only had enough money to buy one rooster. Without a rooster, the chickens were no good to him. He looked high and low, then happened upon a man who claimed that he had a super rooster and could easily service 200 chickens .. so, the old farmer bought him, put him in the barn and went to sleep.
In the morning, the farmer looked out and sure enough, the rooster is laying stone-cold dead in the middle of the field, wings stretched out .. above him, the farmer could see vulchers circling down to their prey.
The farmer walked out to the poor rooster, bend down and said, "I knew it. I knew just one rooster couldn't handle 200 chickens". He reached out to pick up the bird.
Suddenly, the rooster lifted up his head, winked at the farmer, pointed into the sky, and whispered, "Shhhhhhhh"
In the morning, the farmer looked out and sure enough, the rooster is laying stone-cold dead in the middle of the field, wings stretched out .. above him, the farmer could see vulchers circling down to their prey.
The farmer walked out to the poor rooster, bend down and said, "I knew it. I knew just one rooster couldn't handle 200 chickens". He reached out to pick up the bird.
Suddenly, the rooster lifted up his head, winked at the farmer, pointed into the sky, and whispered, "Shhhhhhhh"
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