Hurt Leo Man ... hurting other people

Please forgive me ahead of time this story is slightly long and slightly confusing.

My leo man and I (scorpio) started dating last August. We had a great romance and things were going amazing. We were starting to meet each others family, spending a lot of time together and then things went sour. He has two children with 2 different women and he is currently fighting for custody of both. When 1 of his children's mother noticed that he was happy again, smiling again and he shared that he was dating someone new she became jealous and started making up excuses to try to take their child away. She has another boyfriend but she has the typical mindset of "I don't want him but I don't want him to be happy!" This started a lot of tension between the two of us and we started fighting over stupidity. By the end of October we were broken up and heart broken in our own corners licking our wounds from the EPIC LEO-SCORPIO tongue lashing we had given each other.

This was a very difficult break up for me because I haven't let anyone into my heart in a long time and I'm not accustomed to going from being on the verge of saying "I love you" to saying "I F**king hate you."

So fast forward to January. I went out one night and a friend let me in on what was going on in my leo man's life. Since him and I broke up and I cut contact (i blocked his number, blocked him on facebook and pretty much pretended he was dead .... I'm a scorpio I'm a tad dramatic). I was then informed that he had lost his job, found out one of his children wasn't biologically his ( the same hurtful mother I spoke about above) and things got so bad he had to move back in with his parents. My leo man tends to have some very disloyal friends. So the group of his friends were bad mouthing him and I just looked at all of them in disgust. After that night I cut contact with all of them because of how mean and just horrible they were. That night I went home and unblocked his number and let him know, "Listen I heard about everything that is going on in your life. You are in my prayers and if you ever need a real friend I'm here for you so don't hesitate to reach out."

After that text he reached out and we reconnected. We started dating again but with all that was going on in his life he was trying to make time for me but he really didn't have it. We would make plans but he would fall asleep as soon as I got to his place. I would stay and finish whatever movie we were watching but we didn't have an

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but we didn't have any quality time together. He finally got a job but he works overnight and still cares for the child who isn't his during the day. Sometimes he goes 40 to 50 hours without sleep and he is fighting for custody of his other child. So finally after a few frustrating weeks we decided to just be friends. He explained that where he was in his life he isn't in a place to date.

I remained his friends for the next 2 months. I actually helped financially with his custody battle with his other child, i bought gifts for the kids, one day I knew he was having a rough few weeks so I made him a few mix cd's with a bunch of 1990's pop (which we both love), I brought him his favorite ice cream because I just wanted him to smile even for a few minutes. We hung out a few times, went to church together and I talked to him a lot when he was going through issues. I was realizing that even though we werent together I still have immense feelings for him and I was still in the "I love you" place with him but he had way to much on his plate to care for me in the same way.

So I finally told him about a week ago that I needed to go away. He told me he wanted my friendship but I explained that it wouldn't be fair because I would have ulterior motives being his friend because I know I want more. We would occasionally still have relations and it was making it really hard for me because my emotions were so deeply involved. I let him know that to some degree I felt her was stringing me along and if he didn't see a future with the two of us that I needed him to let me go so I could heal and honestly move on because I want a healthy relationship I don't want to play games and I know he has a lot on his plate but I was willing to support him through it.

He told me he wasn't going to fight with me and he understood where I was coming from but he made sure in typical leo fashion to throw a few jabs in there with his brutal honesty. He told me, "Right now we are just friends and that's it. You keep hoping and wanting more and asking about the future and I can't predict the future."

After that last message I stopped responding. There was nothing more to say because anything would sound pathetic, desperate and like someone who had no self respect of sense of self worth. And granted I love him but I have to love and respect myself first and foremost.

I don't have any kids, I'm a professional girl, I cook, I clean, I love his children and I wouldn'

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mind one day having a few with him myself. I feel I bring a good amount to the table and even though in his words he, "has a lot of baggage" in my opinion he brings a lot to the table too. He might not bring the same things I bring to the table but he is an amazing man.

( this was before the text referenced above)
Before we ended things I was very honest with my feelings. I let him know that I missed the relationship we had in the past and sometimes I wish we could just go back to that place. He let me know that it did mean something to him but his life has changed so much since then and he doesn't want to date anyone right now or for awhile. He also let me know that no relationship can ever go back to it's original place. He has a lot of trust issues which is completely understandable. I let him know I loved him and I also finally gave him the names of the horribly disloyal people in his life. I had to have his trust before I could give him their names because I wasn't in the mood to start the ball rolling for drama. But I also felt that he should know the people who didn't have his back even a little.

Those of you who know Leo men and who are Leo men do you believe he will come back into my life? Will he eventually reach out to me? Will the fact that I truly love and care for him as a person mean anything to this Leo man? I know it's just your opinions but I am curious.

I truly love him but if I can't bring him the happiness he needs I want him to find it with someone else and still live an amazing life because, at least in my opinion, he is a truly amazing man. It's so hard to not text back or interact with him because I care so much but I realize being in the situation is extremely unhealthy.

I just want honest opinions. Please no rude or mean comments. I haven't deleted him from social media and I haven't blocked his number. Instead I have just logged out of social media and I will keep it that way for a few weeks until I heal and I just keep my phone around when I need it. It sounds foolish but I don't want to be immature and hurt him anymore than he has already been hurt.

Wow... It's truly eerie seeing so many parallels!

I don't have any answers, I just hope that things work out for you in whichever way... Good luck Curious!

Posted by Jynja
Awwww... Scorpio women. 🙂

It is true that Scorpio is instinctively geared towards survival, so it seems right for you to fight for the option that gives better security.

In any case, if you don't remove yourself completely from his life, he could come back to you.

I was going to suggest that he was hedging and didn't want to give a definite answer to you about the future because he is not truly into you, but I remembered how Leos (especially the men) are when they are going through crises.

The single minded focus on returning everything to some semblance of normal and routine really makes everything else on the side feel like undue pressure. He might not be able to respond to you emotionally at this time because he has buried that part deep in him. The way you describe his circumstances suggests he has had to be tough to deal.

Being tough to deal is not always an easy state of mind for Leo and so managing that and trying to see a future where he can give you the things you deserve is an overload.

Still, hang in there and offer to be a pillar for him during this time. When things get back to some good place for him and his family, he might well be back.


-- Have you asked him why he continues to care for the child that is not his?

http://www.dxpnet.com/users/profile.asp?username=Jynja ...He loves the child completely! It was funny but when I heard about the paternity I knew even before speaking to him that he would stay in the child's life. The mother and him literally hate each other but he loves that kid with all of him. One weekend we went out of town together and he left a night early just to pick up the kid and be with him. The kid saved his life and helped him turn his life around. He said to me once, "he doesn't even know it but he saved my life!"

Some of his family has even stopped talking to him because he refuses to not leave the child. He is really going through it. I thank you for the advice and the response!

Posted by LilliLou
Wow... It's truly eerie seeing so many parallels!

I don't have any answers, I just hope that things work out for you in whichever way... Good luck Curious!

Lillilou thanks! I'm hoping and praying for the same thing!

this is absolutely scary.... it's almost like i just read my whole relationship with my guy now.... well there's many differences but pretty much the same. going through a tough time then he breaks up with me telling me he just wants to do his thing..... this was mid march..... and i tried to work things out and he wasnt hearing it. until i said ok i'm done. i can't be keep talking to you everyday and be your friend still. i need to move on...... well he's been with me everyday since then. practically living with me.

so to answer your question, yes.... if a man really wants to be with you he will stay or come back... leo or not, man or woman, if someone realizes how improtant you are in their life, they will stay

dont be afraid to walk away.