I need direction please
This topic was created in the Leo forum by crystalr on Saturday, March 28, 2009 and has 7 replies.
Hi,
I was wondering if anyone out there has any ideas because Im lost at this stage. I have been with my leo boyfriend for almost two years. We get on great, all the usual stuff that you read about leo men in reationships. We had three very brief splits. Twice after holidays and once after I had been a bit insulting one night, which I completely apologised for and he took me back. It took quite a bit of coaxing to get him back talking to me, because that's what he does when his pride is hurt, he ignores me. This time however I didn't see a problem coming. We had been getting on great, then on valentines night he casually said the fact that neither of us has made a move to bring the relationship on further must say something about us.I had then told him I was going for a job, that although great money would require me to work ridiculous hours, well that really annoyed him and he got quite thick with me. Then when I wanted to go away a week later, I knew he didn't really want to and I said what is going on. He said he didn't have the same feelings for me anymore. I ignored him for a bit, then rang him and asked him to explain further, he said he wasn't sure he could see me as the mother of his children. I have a daughter and was very upfront about it when we met and he loves her to bits. I was quite shocked by what he said. Then we talked again and I felt he was begining to come around but said he needed space to make big decisions about his life etc. I have since tried to show him how important he is and how much I love him by showering him with compliments. To date, which is a month on, he says he needs two weeks space to think. He doesnt want me to take my stuff out of his place just yet. He occassionally texts, usually to tell me if his team bet my team. I have told him that Im not contacting him again. That i dont want him back out of him not wanting to hurt me, but because he wants me and desires me and wants to fight for what we have. Up till now its been me doing the fighting and he has always said thanks for sticking by him and fighting for what we have together. So now im just really confused!!!! Constantly complimenting him and letting him know I loved him, worked the other times but doesn't seem to be working as well this time. I really feel that this all deteriorated after telling him about the job, I felt he became quite distant after that.I have reassured him that I would never put a career before him or my daughter. What should I do now?
I was wondering if anyone out there has any ideas because Im lost at this stage. I have been with my leo boyfriend for almost two years. We get on great, all the usual stuff that you read about leo men in reationships. We had three very brief splits. Twice after holidays and once after I had been a bit insulting one night, which I completely apologised for and he took me back. It took quite a bit of coaxing to get him back talking to me, because that's what he does when his pride is hurt, he ignores me. This time however I didn't see a problem coming. We had been getting on great, then on valentines night he casually said the fact that neither of us has made a move to bring the relationship on further must say something about us.I had then told him I was going for a job, that although great money would require me to work ridiculous hours, well that really annoyed him and he got quite thick with me. Then when I wanted to go away a week later, I knew he didn't really want to and I said what is going on. He said he didn't have the same feelings for me anymore. I ignored him for a bit, then rang him and asked him to explain further, he said he wasn't sure he could see me as the mother of his children. I have a daughter and was very upfront about it when we met and he loves her to bits. I was quite shocked by what he said. Then we talked again and I felt he was begining to come around but said he needed space to make big decisions about his life etc. I have since tried to show him how important he is and how much I love him by showering him with compliments. To date, which is a month on, he says he needs two weeks space to think. He doesnt want me to take my stuff out of his place just yet. He occassionally texts, usually to tell me if his team bet my team. I have told him that Im not contacting him again. That i dont want him back out of him not wanting to hurt me, but because he wants me and desires me and wants to fight for what we have. Up till now its been me doing the fighting and he has always said thanks for sticking by him and fighting for what we have together. So now im just really confused!!!! Constantly complimenting him and letting him know I loved him, worked the other times but doesn't seem to be working as well this time. I really feel that this all deteriorated after telling him about the job, I felt he became quite distant after that.I have reassured him that I would never put a career before him or my daughter. What should I do now?
Sorry I forgot a few things, in case anyone can help!
I am a libra. We live about an hour apart but we spend every weekend together, the whole weekend. I have never doubted his loyalty to me and I have never been unfaithful. He knows my family and all my friends really well, as i know his. He rings me at least three or four times a day, sometimes more. He told me he loved me first, after about four months and tells me it very often. He has always said how good I am for him and how I stabilise him. There was talk of marriage from him in the first year and he wanted to move up to where I lived but that fell through after we broke up for about a week after a holiday. When we talked last he said it was nothing I had done or said, it was just how he was feeling and that I needed to give him space. He wouldnt go into what he was feeling other than he needed time on his own to make decisions. I would just like to know if anyone has experienced anything similar, did they find ignoring worked, although I read a post from a leo man saying do not ignore them, they want to test you and your loyalty and only those who last the pace will be the ones they commit to! I am just completely confused at this stage!
I am a libra. We live about an hour apart but we spend every weekend together, the whole weekend. I have never doubted his loyalty to me and I have never been unfaithful. He knows my family and all my friends really well, as i know his. He rings me at least three or four times a day, sometimes more. He told me he loved me first, after about four months and tells me it very often. He has always said how good I am for him and how I stabilise him. There was talk of marriage from him in the first year and he wanted to move up to where I lived but that fell through after we broke up for about a week after a holiday. When we talked last he said it was nothing I had done or said, it was just how he was feeling and that I needed to give him space. He wouldnt go into what he was feeling other than he needed time on his own to make decisions. I would just like to know if anyone has experienced anything similar, did they find ignoring worked, although I read a post from a leo man saying do not ignore them, they want to test you and your loyalty and only those who last the pace will be the ones they commit to! I am just completely confused at this stage!
i would strongly suggest giving him the break he is requesting. if you don't, you will lose him either way. it sounds as though he feels things between you are just too heavy and the only way he can deal with that is to take a breather and spend time figuring things out on his own.
be forwarned, he may just feel your relationship has run its full course.
ignoring him will not achieve anything but will equal game playing. do you really want to play games and manipulate the sitch? too many compliments start to sound insincere -especially to a leo.
give him his time and spend some special time with yourself and your daughter as well. do your own thing and enjoy it.
as for what you said about reading the post on leo men and how to "handle" them, one size does not fit all!
be forwarned, he may just feel your relationship has run its full course.
ignoring him will not achieve anything but will equal game playing. do you really want to play games and manipulate the sitch? too many compliments start to sound insincere -especially to a leo.
give him his time and spend some special time with yourself and your daughter as well. do your own thing and enjoy it.
as for what you said about reading the post on leo men and how to "handle" them, one size does not fit all!
Hi Tamara,
Thanks for your advice. I suppose I know myself I have to let him go and see if he comes back to me. Its just damn hard because he was so amazing to be with and I felt completely loved by him that, now that he has backed off I feel so empty. I have been doing what you suggested, in spending alot of quality time with my daughter, and Im really enjoying the time with her. Just doesn't feel the same without him. I suppose because we got back together before I thought that this was just a test to show him how much I felt about him. I thought I could fix it.
Thanks for your advice. I suppose I know myself I have to let him go and see if he comes back to me. Its just damn hard because he was so amazing to be with and I felt completely loved by him that, now that he has backed off I feel so empty. I have been doing what you suggested, in spending alot of quality time with my daughter, and Im really enjoying the time with her. Just doesn't feel the same without him. I suppose because we got back together before I thought that this was just a test to show him how much I felt about him. I thought I could fix it.
You should give him his 2 weeks.
"He said he didn't have the same feelings for me anymore. I ignored him for a bit, then rang him and asked him to explain further, he said he wasn't sure he could see me as the mother of his children."
I personally think it revolves around that and you should be looking further into that. If he still feel the same way, my sincere advice, is that you move on. No matter what you do, you won't get the best of him. However he may get the best of you, until he finds what's best for him.
I personally think it revolves around that and you should be looking further into that. If he still feel the same way, my sincere advice, is that you move on. No matter what you do, you won't get the best of him. However he may get the best of you, until he finds what's best for him.
give him the space he is asking for, and yes, for some reason, Leo men have issues with women who already have children.
I take it he has none? Either way, doesnt matter, give him his space, and lots of it. Find something else to do with your time besides chase him, because he sees that he doesnt have to do the chasing, you are always available, and thats no challenge to him. Just disappear, stop calling or trying to get in touch with him cold turkey. Either he will hunt
you down, or he wont, and if he doesnt, leave it be, that means he wasnt meant for you.
I take it he has none? Either way, doesnt matter, give him his space, and lots of it. Find something else to do with your time besides chase him, because he sees that he doesnt have to do the chasing, you are always available, and thats no challenge to him. Just disappear, stop calling or trying to get in touch with him cold turkey. Either he will hunt
you down, or he wont, and if he doesnt, leave it be, that means he wasnt meant for you.
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Topics
O Holy St. Anthony, gentlest of Saints, your love for God and Charity for His creatures made you worthy, when on earth,
@nikki2008
Joined: Mar 22, 2009 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 6
I always wonder what a pisces/pisces dating situation would be like. I have met a lot of people in the same sign as I am
@lovable_pisces
Joined: Nov 07, 2008 · Topics: 11 · Posts: 439
i really love him.... my bf broke up with me 2 weeks ago. it was only a month ago that he said he'll come visit me in
@stephc
Joined: Mar 28, 2009 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 2
This might have been posted before, but there is this site that collects pics of people and categorizes the based on the
@CuspOfImagination
Joined: Dec 22, 2008 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 45
1. How about a sticky for some threads that are worthy. Some threads are great for intros and others are general enough
@CuspOfImagination
Joined: Dec 22, 2008 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 45
To make this site better an instant messenger or chat room should be incorporated to actively engage members. I would a
@noirecapricornprincess
Joined: Feb 18, 2009 · Topics: 31 · Posts: 448
Aries Males specifically... I understand aries is the first sign of the zodiac and they may come off as jovial and ch
@Lady_M
Joined: May 21, 2006 · Topics: 138 · Posts: 21685
Okay..I'm new here and i just wanted some advice to Capricorns.... so i like this one guy, he's a capricorn but i'm not
@AquariousXCapricorn
Joined: Mar 26, 2009 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 5
Ok guys, I need advice on this, to me it doesn't make sense. I am a Libra and was seeing this Libra guy. We met spa
@libragal76
Joined: Dec 01, 2008 · Topics: 27 · Posts: 310
I try really hard to make sure that I can make decisions in my personal matters as quickly and without regret as I can.
@sweethearts
Joined: Mar 24, 2006 · Topics: 326 · Posts: 6615