My leo man came back after 1.5 of no contact
This topic was created in the No Contact forum by Alex1234 on Saturday, May 11, 2013 and has 42 replies.
He asked many questions, said he was sorry we did not meet since I'm back home.
I played cool and didn't say much regarding personal stuff such as how I miss him, etc..
Do leo men test the waters, does he want to check if I moved on??
Thanks for your help.
I played cool and didn't say much regarding personal stuff such as how I miss him, etc..
Do leo men test the waters, does he want to check if I moved on??
Thanks for your help.
Congrats to you that is exactly what I want my Leo man to do. Did he ask to see you? The only way you will know if he wants you back if he keeps putting an effort to get you back but see what the Leo's have to say because I'm not a Leo but I dated one and when he wanted me he put all out for me and when he decided to date someone else he became distant no calling then cut me off completely.
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
He wants something.
Guys pop back up out of nowhere for usually selfish reasons. I'd keep doing what you're doing because his real intent will show up sooner than later.
This isn't a Leo thing, it's a guy thing.
Guys pop back up out of nowhere for usually selfish reasons. I'd keep doing what you're doing because his real intent will show up sooner than later.
This isn't a Leo thing, it's a guy thing.
1.5...what? Days? Weeks...months..years...decades?
1.5 month.
We loved each other very much then I started to act totally irrationally. He left.
We loved each other very much then I started to act totally irrationally. He left.
Nothing happened so far, he simply contacted me. Does not mean he wants me back.
I am going to add on to what Jynja has said.
Us Leo's, it is hard for us to walk away from something that we have hard feelings for, unless what you did was so awful that we do what I call ice over. Then there is no chance in hell.
I take it you are a Virgo. This is the dance that Virgo/Leo's can do. Virgo's are passive and want the other player to take the lead and are very slow to evaluate their own personal steps and overanlyze everything. We Leo's have no problem taking the lead, but we need affirmation to nudge us. I like to know a sure thing if I am going to take lead and it is hard for me to do so if I am unsure. Call it, I don't want my pride hurt. If we are unsure, we will withdraw back and start evaluate our defenses and lick our wounds or we will react as sure fire hellcats. Since Virgo's can be reluctant to make their true feelings known and protective over their own self preservation it can be hard for us Leo's to know exactly where you stand with us and this will be hard for to be sure about the relationship and cause us to self-doubt. We don't like self doubting. We need our ego's stroked for reassurance.
Take the lead in this. You admit it was your actions that lead to this break up. evaluate (and quickly) what you want. If you want him. Tell HIM. Admit your feelings, tell him what you want, admit your wrongs, address how it will change and what you have learned and tell him what you desire from him. Be prepared for it to go either way. He can be accepting and gracious or he could feel it is over and reject you. Are you able to handle the rejection? Don't take forever on these moves, because he will move on.
Us Leo's, it is hard for us to walk away from something that we have hard feelings for, unless what you did was so awful that we do what I call ice over. Then there is no chance in hell.
I take it you are a Virgo. This is the dance that Virgo/Leo's can do. Virgo's are passive and want the other player to take the lead and are very slow to evaluate their own personal steps and overanlyze everything. We Leo's have no problem taking the lead, but we need affirmation to nudge us. I like to know a sure thing if I am going to take lead and it is hard for me to do so if I am unsure. Call it, I don't want my pride hurt. If we are unsure, we will withdraw back and start evaluate our defenses and lick our wounds or we will react as sure fire hellcats. Since Virgo's can be reluctant to make their true feelings known and protective over their own self preservation it can be hard for us Leo's to know exactly where you stand with us and this will be hard for to be sure about the relationship and cause us to self-doubt. We don't like self doubting. We need our ego's stroked for reassurance.
Take the lead in this. You admit it was your actions that lead to this break up. evaluate (and quickly) what you want. If you want him. Tell HIM. Admit your feelings, tell him what you want, admit your wrongs, address how it will change and what you have learned and tell him what you desire from him. Be prepared for it to go either way. He can be accepting and gracious or he could feel it is over and reject you. Are you able to handle the rejection? Don't take forever on these moves, because he will move on.
Is it a typical virgo trait?
@Jynja, I wouldn't call it with a Virgo. I would still define it as a very close and strong friendship. And yes a little more. 
But I am in no shape ready for a romantic relationship (and I know he isn't either), one I am still married. This should be taken care of in the next couple of months. Once I have closed that chapter I will need to finish the grieving process of my marriage ending and work on knowing me, the woman I am, not the child who married at 19. I work fast though. Some people don't get the ability to process and make changes fast. But I am an analyst and very self aware of my body and emotions. I don't like things untidy and unbalanced so I dive in and work on it quickly and move through self discovery and growth very efficiently. I don't need it wrapped up and tidy as life is always a learning and growing process but I need the understanding of self and have my ground work set for the scales to be more balanced.
Dealing with his passiveness. A lesson of great patience. Since I know where I stand, I am accepting for now. Before my "ex"husband returned a couple of weeks ago, I did admit I was falling for him. This was VERY hard for me to do. I am traditional in the sense that I like the man to make the first step and two, I never had to make this first step. His response was, that is what I want for you, is to be sure. I know what it is like to be coming out of a long relationship and wanting the closeness of another person. OK affirmation? Not sure. It is not clear cut as I would prefer. And I hear the undertone of him not wanting to be a "rebound". Fair enough.
The next day I brought it up one more time to clarify and told him this was the last time I would bring it up. I admitted my feelings to him and I would not have addressed this to him if I did not evaluate all angles including him being a substitute for that intamiacy I had the past 14 years. If I found that was the case I would need to step back from him because this has become an unhealthy relationship and I am using him. His response, that it meant a lot to him, we both need healing before to do before anything could be healthy. Affirmation? Not sure. True though in general.
But I am in no shape ready for a romantic relationship (and I know he isn't either), one I am still married. This should be taken care of in the next couple of months. Once I have closed that chapter I will need to finish the grieving process of my marriage ending and work on knowing me, the woman I am, not the child who married at 19. I work fast though. Some people don't get the ability to process and make changes fast. But I am an analyst and very self aware of my body and emotions. I don't like things untidy and unbalanced so I dive in and work on it quickly and move through self discovery and growth very efficiently. I don't need it wrapped up and tidy as life is always a learning and growing process but I need the understanding of self and have my ground work set for the scales to be more balanced.Dealing with his passiveness. A lesson of great patience. Since I know where I stand, I am accepting for now. Before my "ex"husband returned a couple of weeks ago, I did admit I was falling for him. This was VERY hard for me to do. I am traditional in the sense that I like the man to make the first step and two, I never had to make this first step. His response was, that is what I want for you, is to be sure. I know what it is like to be coming out of a long relationship and wanting the closeness of another person. OK affirmation? Not sure. It is not clear cut as I would prefer. And I hear the undertone of him not wanting to be a "rebound". Fair enough.
The next day I brought it up one more time to clarify and told him this was the last time I would bring it up. I admitted my feelings to him and I would not have addressed this to him if I did not evaluate all angles including him being a substitute for that intamiacy I had the past 14 years. If I found that was the case I would need to step back from him because this has become an unhealthy relationship and I am using him. His response, that it meant a lot to him, we both need healing before to do before anything could be healthy. Affirmation? Not sure. True though in general.
So, I am not sure how to read into this. It is not the straight forward responses I need, and I have become very skilled in getting identifying the subtle ego stroking I need to know I am doing what I need to in a relationship, work, or just life. This I know I will need a strong affirmation in to know where I stand with him. As for now, I am OK with what it is. But there will come a time I will need for him to know where he is with me and I will ask of that. If he wants to be with me, but needs time. I can be patient. But I will need this affirmation as I will not put my life on hold for someone who will not reciprocate it back or it is not sure. And I will just maintain a friendship with him.
Yes, he has made his move with Alex, she needs to make her move. Life is hard, and there will be rejection. There are cruel people out there, so if he is out for revenge, then she really doesn't need that person in her life. Self Confidence. Move on and learn from it. Cut your losses. But unless thing are progressed, she will continue to question.
Yes, he has made his move with Alex, she needs to make her move. Life is hard, and there will be rejection. There are cruel people out there, so if he is out for revenge, then she really doesn't need that person in her life. Self Confidence. Move on and learn from it. Cut your losses. But unless thing are progressed, she will continue to question.
How can I know if it is revenge or genuine interest?
Posted by Alex1234
Is it a typical virgo trait?
Passiveness? I would say yes. Virgo's are very protective over their inner feelings and put a strong wall around their heart that is hard to penetrate. This will make it hard for them to make the moves and it will cause them to retreat if they feel their defensive wall is being attacked for self preservation.
In reality, Leo/Virgo are really not that different. We just approach life differently. But when you look at what we want and our essential wants and desires in life, very similar. We can learn from each other. And I have learned from my Virgo friend that has helped me become more practical in my approach in life. More patient. More balanced. The warmth of the of the Leo's Sun can melt the Virgo's cool Earth. The coolness of the Virgo's Earth can cool down the fiery flame of the Leo's Sun. We can learn from each other to make each of us a better person.
Posted by Alex1234
How can I know if it is revenge or genuine interest?
See, you are over analyzing the situation. (I do over analyzing myself a lot) That is the thing. You won't know until he shows you. If it is revenge, it will be shown. If it is genuine, it will be shown. The question is, are you prepared for either out come? Are you willing to take the chance you want and if it works, beautiful, and if it doesn't, it will hurt like hell but you will learn and move on with your life. Or are you willing to beat on the "what ifs"?
*Bet not beat.
I'm willing to take any risk but I don't want to show my feelings. If he misses me and wants to see me, I guess he will tell me at some point.
Well, I guess I showed interest as I answered his message, asked how he is doing, what's new, etc, etc...
Alex, tiziani said it perfectly. We need to see feelings. We need to know what it is about. If those feeling are there and known and reciprocate it back, we will fight for the relationship. We are very loyal creatures when it comes to relationships with those we have chosen unless it is something very bad or done to us. If we go cold, good luck. We will not back down easily if we know what we are fighting for is true. If there is any doubt, we will not go for it or be very hesitant.
Posted by Alex1234
Well, I guess I showed interest as I answered his message, asked how he is doing, what's new, etc, etc...
Hidden post for not having my thoughts organized.
This is not enough. That is being cordial and conversational. We can be cordial with people we don't like. You need to express how you are feel to him. I know this is not what you want, but if you can't do it, then move on.
I still love him but I'm having a hard figuring out what he wants.
Posted by Alex1234
I still love him but I'm having a hard figuring out what he wants.
It is scary to say something to someone that exposes our most internal vulnerabilities. The thing is, can we handle what the out come will be. Can we handle it if it doesn't turn out the way we want it too? That is hard thing to do.
The only way you will know is to lay it out to him. Tell him how you feel and what you want the outcome to be. Then see what the outcome is. He may tell you straight forward what he feels and he may need time to figure that out for himself. But unless you make the move, you will continue the dance of what if and questioning his motives. If he is a true Leo, he will respect you for your brute honesty and appreciate it.
He is the man, I think he should tell me what he wants.
After all, he may simply want to be friend with you or just wanted to know how I'm doing!
After all, he may simply want to be friend with you or just wanted to know how I'm doing!
Do you think that if he really wants something he will tell me even if I don't show my feelings?
I understand, he is the man. I have always let the man make the first move. Maybe it is that ego stroking thing I need.
But today, the "traditional" roles of relationship have evolved. It is a known fact, men and woman are wired differently neurologically speaking. Just looking at the corpus callosum (I think that is what it is called)that links the right brain to the left brain, in men it is very narrow and in woman in it is very broad. That is one reason men are more simple in their emotions and woman are more complex. But today in society we are more aware, psychologically speaking of our emotions and mental health. We have become more aware of what we need to do in order to maintain a more healthy life. Speaking our emotions is one way to do so. You are doing so now as you work through this dilemma your brain is fighting with. It is up to you to take action on it. It is your decision what you want that action to be and the impact it will have on you. He may never expose how he truly feels. And yes, he could just being friendly. Who knows??
What is important is COMMUNICATION. You can't sit there and expect to know what he is feeling unless you communicate that you want to know. That is the big problem in any form of relationships. Communication. We are always trying to figure out where the other person is or make assumptions. Unless we communicate we will never progress.
But today, the "traditional" roles of relationship have evolved. It is a known fact, men and woman are wired differently neurologically speaking. Just looking at the corpus callosum (I think that is what it is called)that links the right brain to the left brain, in men it is very narrow and in woman in it is very broad. That is one reason men are more simple in their emotions and woman are more complex. But today in society we are more aware, psychologically speaking of our emotions and mental health. We have become more aware of what we need to do in order to maintain a more healthy life. Speaking our emotions is one way to do so. You are doing so now as you work through this dilemma your brain is fighting with. It is up to you to take action on it. It is your decision what you want that action to be and the impact it will have on you. He may never expose how he truly feels. And yes, he could just being friendly. Who knows??
What is important is COMMUNICATION. You can't sit there and expect to know what he is feeling unless you communicate that you want to know. That is the big problem in any form of relationships. Communication. We are always trying to figure out where the other person is or make assumptions. Unless we communicate we will never progress.
Alex, you are being unfair to him. You are expecting him to show himself while you preserve yourself and protect himself. How can you expect anyone to communicate how they feel about you if you unable to do the same, even in self preservation.
Can't tell if he will. I don't know him or his personality as person. This rides deeper then astrology. I believe in astrology, but I also believe in nurture vs nature. There are so many variables here to know for sure.
Can't tell if he will. I don't know him or his personality as person. This rides deeper then astrology. I believe in astrology, but I also believe in nurture vs nature. There are so many variables here to know for sure.
Crap. *protect yourself
Wow this is good info for an Aquarius who likes a Leo.
The Leo I am talking to was the one who did the wrong.. then came back to me? I was so confused by it. The need to know how I am feeling thing was hard for me. Aquarius = unemotional but I strapped on a pair and told him what I wanted and how I felt. His response was good. First time dealing with a Leo for me. It has been amazing how romantic they are, kind and wanting to impress. Leo and Aquarius are true opposites but they do attract!
The Leo I am talking to was the one who did the wrong.. then came back to me? I was so confused by it. The need to know how I am feeling thing was hard for me. Aquarius = unemotional but I strapped on a pair and told him what I wanted and how I felt. His response was good. First time dealing with a Leo for me. It has been amazing how romantic they are, kind and wanting to impress. Leo and Aquarius are true opposites but they do attract!
Just go with it and see where it goes. DO NOT THINK TOO MUCH ABOUT IT! If he didn't want to talk to you he wouldn't. Men really tell you exactly what they think and feel. It is up to you to listen to what he is saying even if he is a Leo.
Last time we spoke was on Sathursday night. Since, no news.
Does that mean he gave up?
Does that mean he gave up?
Ok I finally proposed to meet ...
Alex, First no, it doesn't mean he gave up. 2 days is not a long time. It can seem forever though. I don't know what he does in his life, but we can be known to be very busy people. My life is on a constant run. Second, good for you to make that step! I know this was a hard step to make and I hope things turn out well when you guys meet!
By proposing, am I being too straight forward?
Was it a mistake?
Was it a mistake?
I've awful to him and he still came back to me after 1.5 of no contact.
Maybe he was polite and has no intention to see me..
Was it too early to ask?
By proposing, you are being straight forward, he should respect that. He may not accept the proposal for a meet up, but he should respect it. And no not to soon. You made your move. Now you just have to wait for his move, I don't know how long that can be.
He said he s sorry we did not meet since Im back home.
Why then would he refuse to meet?
Why then would he refuse to meet?
I finally cut ties, he is too complicated for me and he was a player. Just came back out of curiosity, to see if I was still interested.
Thanks all for your replies.
Thanks all for your replies.
Good Luck Alex! Sorry it didn't work out for you.
Just curious, did he tell you he was just looking to if you were interested?
Just curious, did he tell you he was just looking to if you were interested?
No he did not. He was quite keen to meet but it seemed difficult to find a date, and he seems pretty busy.
To me, if he wanted to me quickly, he would find time for me.
To me, if he wanted to me quickly, he would find time for me.
*meet
peachpeaches, whats your message
Ok so I told him I did not want to have any contact with him had to move on etc but he contacted me a few times.
He said I have to grow up etc etc and he is casually dating. He said a few drinks with some people but he did not replace me or have not found better.
Am I a second choice? Games? ...
He said I have to grow up etc etc and he is casually dating. He said a few drinks with some people but he did not replace me or have not found better.
Am I a second choice? Games? ...
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Topics
http://www.astro.com/tmpd/cpyyfilehNQUqz-u1365127766/astro_w2at_01_rey_rey_hp.58439.12138.gif
@Kmzyta
Joined: May 08, 2013 · Topics: 4 · Posts: 11
I'm pretty much your stereotypical sag female, and I've been quite taken with a virgo male for two years now. We are so
@nienne
Joined: May 11, 2013 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 3
Hi, I am a pisces girl and I have noticed that all the men in my life that I have been instantly sexually attracted t
@honeybee00
Joined: May 11, 2013 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 3
Hi, I am a pisces girl and I have noticed that all the men in my life that I have been instantly sexually attracted t
@honeybee00
Joined: May 11, 2013 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 3
I was recently romantically involved with a Virgo man. I'm new to this forum, so wanted to send you a small question reg
@PGirl
Joined: May 08, 2013 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 2
I'm sorry if this is not posted in exactly the right place, but is anyone here familiar with Empaths? I can't find any
@Mayze22
Joined: May 08, 2013 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 16
Hi, this is my first post. Am 33 years old and have fallen in love with a 41 year old Aries women. After 18 months to
@Chrisf
Joined: May 11, 2013 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 13
Is it a virgo thing? I know we're known to be caregivers but doesnt everyone feel like total crap when they let a frie
@Herself
Joined: May 08, 2013 · Topics: 16 · Posts: 319
@Honeybees
Joined: Aug 11, 2012 · Topics: 12 · Posts: 109
So today, the aqua's ex wife added him on facebook. With her lst name still the aqua's last name. I was surprised. I rea
@Aria
Joined: Apr 27, 2013 · Topics: 27 · Posts: 195