Need some opinions

I've met this Leo man a few months ago, by chance; we've met in the park while jogging and started chatting. We ended up going out together to run, almost every week or every two weeks. As we were hanging out, we were talking more about general things, not so much intimate ones, cause he's extremely private with his life. So far, every time he tried to get physically closer to me (for e.g. waiting for a kiss, etc.) I did not reciprocate, except for hugs.

Anyway, long story short, he told me recently, that we should go on a short trip. I asked him directly if we're gonna get intimate during it, and he laughed. So I asked him, where are we standing, because if we are about to get intimate, I'm not interested in casual sex. I can't do it, cause I get feelings of attachment (aka need a serious relationship).

He told me he likes to be free, not to have plans so he can travel where he wants, do what he wants (not to have someone to tell him what to do). And that he does not want to ruin our friendship. I imagine he expected we can have sex and afterwards return to just hanging out, like nothing happened. He says he's happy we didn't had arguments/ fights so far and wants to keep it like that. And that he likes, that I didn't asked him too many personal questions. He asked if I'm ok with this (being friends), and I said I'm ok.

After this discussion he still likes to hold my hand and Intertwined fingers, send kissy emojis while we talk online, etc. I'm a bit confused on why he makes physical contact (like holding hands), if he only sees me as a friend. If I'd get more touchy with him, I bet he would not mind it, but I don't see why I'd do that, since he sent me to the friendzone.

Also, it would be better to just let this go? It will be over when he will get interested in a new woman anyway, I'm thinking.

He wants to be free and have casual sex

You don’t

So don’t have sex with him….

Just a matter of you placing firm boundaries

He didn't send you to the friendzone! You sent yourself, because you didn't get what you wanted.

Now he gives some signs that he enjoys turning your head as a challenge, so be careful with this "friendship".

Posted by MarkGem
Yeh God forbid he might actually want to see where things go

He has to state his intentions up front in a written plan of action

A lot of you women ruin things because you have to interject with "but what are we..?"

I see nothing wrong with saying from the beginning what my expectations are, and wanting the same (to hear other person’s intentions) in return. I thought (honest) communication is the key to everything.

And I appreciate the fact, that he was honest to me.

I know about myself that it would break my heart to be physically, emotionally, mentally, financially invested into a man, only for him to tell me, we’re in a casual relationship (and maybe seeing someone else on the side too, etc).

I know this, because of past experience. I’ve been with a guy who wanted to “go with the flow” (it was my first relationship). I found from common friend some months later, that he wanted to hookup with a girl he met in a hostel, while he stayed in. Apparently, he bragged about it. It was my fault because I didn’t knew, how to communicate what I wanted.

What should I do? Have sex with the Leo man and expect he’ll eventually fall in love, afterwards? Most of the men don’t do that. Sex and love are not inseparable to men.

This scenario leads to an unbalanced situation, where one side gets what they want, while the other keeps offering, while hoping (emphasize on hoping) they’ll get what they want in return…one day.

Posted by Undine
He didn't send you to the friendzone! You sent yourself, because you didn't get what you wanted.

It's true.

Posted by Undine
Now he gives some signs that he enjoys turning your head as a challenge, so be careful with this "friendship".

click to expand

I will be careful. We can still talk, go out to exercise but I'm fairly guarded with my feelings.

Thanks everyone a lot for your replies! 🙂