Standing ground with a leo male?

This topic was created in the Leo forum by scorpchick76 on Sunday, September 22, 2013 and has 15 replies.
Bullet points:
Hit it off with leo friend- spent night together no sex
Spent every other day for a week hanging out, completely affectionate - kissing, cuddles, date like...
Slept together (my choice) after he told me he's not ready for anything serious 'right now' (I couldn't deny the chemistry... And it was an intense connection for both of us)
-he took me out again, was easy and fun and affectionate (him reaching for my hand, etc)
-he went elsewhere for the big game on the weekend even though I asked him to join me and common friends. I was annoyed but didn't blame him rather decided that I won't let myself fall for someone who is not ready for me and told him this.
He's still being flirty, calling me babe and cute and alluding to me being 'marriage material' in a good way. Also still teasing about how good the sex was.
I told him I'm worth hanging onto and I think he knows this but for reasons I don't know he's not ready.
Is this typical of a leo? Will standing my ground get me anywhere or will he move on (if he does its his choice, I won't chase, I'll just be open about where I am at as I have been). Can I (or should I) be vulnerable with him in terms of where I am at?
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Stand your ground.
If he moves on, then he wouldn't have stayed, anyway.
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"Slept together (my choice) after he told me he's not ready for anything serious 'right now'"
Why do men do this shit? Tell a woman AFTER he gets the booty he doesn't want anything serious.
If you like him or maybe even feel you could love him or are in love with him don't settle. He's already stated he's not looking for anything serious so all that cuddling, hand holding etc means nothing, least nothing that will lead him into anything serious.
Stand your ground. He'll either man up or move on.
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Tiki... He actually was a good guy in it all... He actually didn't let things progress even though it was hard for him to do UNTIL he told me about not wanting serious.
I appreciated his honesty and jumped him anyway, my choice, no regrets. But I don't want to settle and he knows I'm worth it so I'm sure he'll come around. I appreciate that he has things he wants to accomplish before settling down.
Funny though he's been messaging me all day still. Even with me giving him a hard time about not realizing my awesomeness. Thanks guys for the confirmation!!!
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Hey @Scorpchick76 I agree with everyone else here. If he's serious and interested you will know. I have a Leo boyfriend of 6 years, so the reason I'm commenting on this post is to tell you (like others have) to stand your grand, you know maybe you could keep doing this no-attachment thing and eventually make him fall in love and then give an ultimatum, however, as it seems right now he's not about the serious committed relationship life. Bat And he does realize your awesomeness I'm sure. I just feel like Leo's are very prideful and protective of their heart. They have to know that you're the IT girl before they can settle. Making him realize your worth may end up being a long, hard battle..but it could also get him to see how valuable you are. I guess in the end you have to make that choice about what you want to do. I mean at the moment, it doesn't seem like you mind to much with the no-attachment thing and that's okay. Maybe, just maybe it'll make him fall for you in the end? Only time will tell :O
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I am definitely a challenge to him but I think he likes it. He doesn't want anything serious right now because he wants to find himself outside of being in a relationship. I respect that.
Apparently him and I are very similar in that in relationships we both give a lot of ourselves often putting the other person first which I think might actually work well. Time will tell.
I feel good about it all though, he's still really flirty and does want me. I think the fact that he can't have me actually works in my favor. I'm a challenge in a way that most girls aren't to him.
I'm gonna keep living my life and keep flirting and having fun but he doesn't get my body or heart. If in time he is ready and comes back and I'm also free we can go from there.
We see each other almost every day too... Makes it interesting. smile
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Posted by scorpchick76
I am definitely a challenge to him but I think he likes it. He doesn't want anything serious right now because he wants to find himself outside of being in a relationship. I respect that.
Apparently him and I are very similar in that in relationships we both give a lot of ourselves often putting the other person first which I think might actually work well. Time will tell.
I feel good about it all though, he's still really flirty and does want me. I think the fact that he can't have me actually works in my favor. I'm a challenge in a way that most girls aren't to him.
I'm gonna keep living my life and keep flirting and having fun but he doesn't get my body or heart. If in time he is ready and comes back and I'm also free we can go from there.
We see each other almost every day too... Makes it interesting. smile



Yeah, this sounds fun-- and you have the right attitude. Winking
Where's your Venus? I'm curious.
Thanks

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Posted by scorpchick76
Tiki... He actually was a good guy in it all... He actually didn't let things progress even though it was hard for him to do UNTIL he told me about not wanting serious.
I appreciated his honesty and jumped him anyway, my choice, no regrets. But I don't want to settle and he knows I'm worth it so I'm sure he'll come around. I appreciate that he has things he wants to accomplish before settling down.
Funny though he's been messaging me all day still. Even with me giving him a hard time about not realizing my awesomeness. Thanks guys for the confirmation!!!


But would you have jumped him had he told you day one he was not serious?
He's also alluding to marriage etc AFTER the fact which is very misleading. Why men do this shit to women I have no idea but it's annoying as all hell, thank God I'm married, I can't LOL
If he does not want to be serious I would suggest you believe him. Right now he's after more sex thus why he's toying with your head when he's talking about marriage etc to get back into your panties with no strings attached.
Be a Queen, have an Queenly AIR about yourself that makes him want to keep coming. He'll respect you and want to keep you if he's smart. If he's a jack ass he won't care either way.
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Posted by scorpchick76
Bullet points:
Hit it off with leo friend- spent night together no sex
Spent every other day for a week hanging out, completely affectionate - kissing, cuddles, date like...
Slept together (my choice) after he told me he's not ready for anything serious 'right now' (I couldn't deny the chemistry... And it was an intense connection for both of us)............................................................................................... Can I (or should I) be vulnerable with him in terms of where I am at?


She slept with him AFTER he told her he wasn't ready for a relationship.
So she is using sex to get him to give her more. Now she wants to tell him she wants more, as if it's his responsibility now. Once you slept with him you communicated with him that it's okay to have sex and not be in a relationship.
Do you want a relationship or are you just sharing feelings?
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Posted by seraph
Posted by LunarMaiden

She slept with him AFTER he told her he wasn't ready for a relationship.



It does look like that. In that case, all bets are off. Lol
He basically told her what sex between them would be about.
Some women think they can rope a man in with good sex, hoping to change his mind.
This isn't to suggest she's being manipulative, but that she's probably hoping for something he isn't prepared to give (and probably won't at all if he's pressed on it further.)
And it isn't like your typical Leo male hasn't had great sex already.
click to expand


I'm sure apart of the sleeping with him after he said he wasn't ready for a relationship was emotions and feelings and hoping for more. But just once I would like to see a poster throw in a let's just be friends then, no sex and see what happens.
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Posted by scorpchick76
Bullet points:

Is this typical of a leo? Will standing my ground get me anywhere or will he move on (if he does its his choice, I won't chase, I'll just be open about where I am at as I have been). Can I (or should I) be vulnerable with him in terms of where I am at?


It is typical behavior when he didn't have to chase or work for it. "It" was given away after a week or so according to what you wrote. If you decide to chase, it will only makes matters worse. Unfortunately, there is no ground to stand upon. So I do not think much will happen.
Leos have options. Those options are almost always worth exploring to us.
Enjoy the memory sounds like you had a great time.
On a side note, telling someone you are worth hanging on to doesn't necessarily make it so. I think it is for the other person to recognize. #shouldershrug
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Posted by LunarMaiden
So she is using sex to get him to give her more. Now she wants to tell him she wants more, as if it's his responsibility now. Once you slept with him you communicated with him that it's okay to have sex and not be in a relationship.


Harsh crowd here. First some clarification... I had sex with him BECAUSE I WANTED TO - it was an amazing PHYSICAL connection, no more no less. I made that choice - he actually struggled with it because of where he was at but the chemistry was undeniable.
Also, I didn't ask him for anything - that's where I think most people get it backwards - they want to change a person/make them into what they want. I completely accept his decision on not being serious- as I did before I slept with him. I don't want to change him - nor would I even think I could. What I did was make a choice for MYSELF. I decided that what he had to offer wasn't enough for me and because of that he didn't get any of me - the hand holding/ kissing/ and sex had to stop and it has - though we continue to BOTH flirt.
I have no doubt I could sleep with him again if I wanted to and it'd be easy BUT... him and I both know that's not going to happen because I do want more. He can't give it (no ones fault, just how it is) but doesn't mean that connection isn't still there. He knows however that he can't get in my pants and that I'm strong enough to stand up to him but still enchanting (his word) enough to challenge him.
It's interesting...
Our charts are below - would his scorpio moon having anything to do with how we can connect?
Me:
Sun - Scorpio
Moon - Aries
Mercury - Scorpio
Venus - Sag
Mars - Scorpio
Jupiter - Taurus
Saturn - Leo
Uranus - Scorpio
Neptune - Sag
Pluto - Libra
Lilith - Taurus
Him:
Sun - Leo
Moon - Scorpio
Mercury - Leo
Venus - Cancer
Mars - Libra
Jupiter - Scorpio
Saturn - Libra
Uranus - Sag
Neptune - Sag
Pluto - Libra
Lilith - Capricorn
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Posted by tiki33
But would you have jumped him had he told you day one he was not serious?


Tiki - the answer to that is probably still yes... what can I say - I'm a girl who likes sex and when the chemistry is that out of this world well then... ya. I don't at all regret having sex with him - in fact I do want more of it but I also don't want to settle for less than I deserve and knowing where he's at I would be with him (right now).
Let's also firm up that - 'right now' he does I think want more (he's a relationship type) but he made a promise to himself to be on his own (right now).
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Posted by seraph
Well there was no doubt at all that it would be a sexually-charged connection. Lol Leo-on-Scorp is a sizzler, I tell ya what.


So true!! It's killing me not to just do it again but in a way makes it worth it too (as I think I will again some day) Winking
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Thanks Jynga, I really appreciate your comments. And I've already been giving my 'stance' a little more thought.
I think for me it's coming from my past relationship where I went about things backwards and got hurt because of it. I also lost sight of who i was in the process which i dont want to do again. I know he's not the same guy but still it causes uncertainty.
For me I need to be chosen... Sometimes. I think really that's it and I need to be clear and thus a bit vulnerable with him in explaining all this (where my head is at/ previous issues). It's also not about asking him to change or be anyone other than who he is but rather what's enough for me.
He's coming over for dinner tomorrow night and I'm excited to just have fun with him but also to converse in an honest and open way to see if there is some common ground that works for us both.
From what he's told me we both lose ourselves when we fall for others so I can understand his needs atm too and hopefully my opening up to him about me will start something on a deeper level.
How would his scorpio moon relate to me scorpio sun? Any ideas?
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