Tell someone your feelings to get closure?

This topic was created in the Leo forum by julyocean on Wednesday, April 24, 2013 and has 11 replies.
Ever feel like telling someone your feelings even if you know they don't feel the same way about you? Am I being impulsive and irrational? Not as an ultimatum or mind games. I feel like I need to get it off my chest because it's overwhelming, and to get closure. I need him to actually reject me or ignore me. It's going to hurt like a bitch, but I'm already hurting holding back.
ranting.. Sad
Posted by julyocean
Ever feel like telling someone your feelings even if you know they don't feel the same way about you? Am I being impulsive and irrational? Not as an ultimatum or mind games. I feel like I need to get it off my chest because it's overwhelming, and to get closure. I need him to actually reject me or ignore me. It's going to hurt like a bitch, but I'm already hurting holding back.
ranting.. Sad


makes perfect sense. you might actually not feel that much once you get it out of your system smile
I do that all the time... They never like me but at least i can move on
There's always a reason why things didn't work out.
From my experience, when things didn't work out, I want to give them a piece of my mind to give myself closure... but then I think about whether they deserve it or not.
Meaning, do you want them to know how much you're still pining for them or miss them or have hurt you?
My answer to myself most of the time: no.
I just have to say, yes to everything you said.
Posted by julyocean
Ever feel like telling someone your feelings even if you know they don't feel the same way about you? Am I being impulsive and irrational? Not as an ultimatum or mind games. I feel like I need to get it off my chest because it's overwhelming, and to get closure. I need him to actually reject me or ignore me. It's going to hurt like a bitch, but I'm already hurting holding back.
ranting.. Sad


You're allowed to have your emotions, process them, and attempt to rid the pain in the most healthy way you can. If you find yourself seeing this as your way out of the hurt (of holding back), so be it.
You deserve to take this weight off of your chest.
I feel the SAME EXACT WAY like all the time... even if I know the outcome will not be in my benefit at all, or like I can predict exactly how a person is going to feel about what I have to say... there always comes a point when you just want to say it so that its out in the universe instead of getting tangled in you head, amen to that rant
Posted by julyocean
Ever feel like telling someone your feelings even if you know they don't feel the same way about you? Am I being impulsive and irrational? Not as an ultimatum or mind games. I feel like I need to get it off my chest because it's overwhelming, and to get closure. I need him to actually reject me or ignore me. It's going to hurt like a bitch, but I'm already hurting holding back.
ranting.. Sad


I'm with everyone here-- no, it isn't impulsive (obviously) or irrational.

It looks like the pain of staying the same just became greater than the pain of change, for you-- cool.
smile

Thanks all...
How about inviting him over just to slam the door on his face? hehehe
I've done that many times and to me, it's much more satisfying than pouring my heart out.
But that's me. Big Grin
But I do wish you well. I hope your pain subsides. I know what it's like to be in your position and it's not fun. Be kind to yourself. We all put ourselves and our hearts out there just so we can love and be loved and to share life with, hoping it would last. We all want to find that someone special, to go through with life's ups and downs. But sometimes, life just doesn't work out that way.
I pray that you will be okay and that you do find closure whether it's through words or slamming the door to his face.
hugs!
I did that exact thing to a Leo male after we didn't speak for 6 weeks.
I think it's important to always define what your objective is. Mine was to release pent up frustration AND IT FELT FANTASTIC TO RELEASE IT!!!
You see, I never got to talk about what happened. I felt wonderful after writing it down and emailing it. I felt even better when I got 3 receipts that he opened the email over 3 different days. I knew it must have impacted on him because when I saw him at a function, he appeared like he didn't care...was popular and tried to make me jealous.
My personality easily forgives so my letter was one of friendship and not mushy (despite being a Cancerian). I just wanted to share what we had been together and asked if we could get closure. I never received a reply...apparently ignoring him for turning on me is a bad thing with Leo's ego.
You can be assertive without being cruel. You may even get a response.
I say do it and you will find relief even if you dont speak to him again (it's been 3 weeks since I wrote to him and while I still would love closure and understanding, I'm not broken hearted by holding in so many emotions)
It's so hard being in your position. I hope this gives you some happiness.