will he come back to me
This topic was created in the Leo forum by bkchk on Friday, March 8, 2013 and has 8 replies.
i really relate to this having been a scorp on the other side of a leo with an on/off ex. he made another attempt to get together with me when they were off but because i was reticent to let myself get hurt again, it took months to resume dialogue with him. then he became so non-committal that i started dating someone else and after a few weeks i started to see the leo out with the on/off gf again.
to me his body language reeks of him wanting me whereas he barely acknowledges his gf in public. but at the end of the day, i don't want a man who can't make up his mind. one who makes you feel you have to somehow outdo an ex to make yourself worthy enough for them to actually leave them behind for good. hell will freeze over before i become sloppy seconds.
it has hurt like hell in the past. seriously....never been hurt by a man that way before. now i just believe 'what will be, will be'. this has all been going on for over 2 years now but i never once put my life on hold for him...still won't.
it's very hard but you have to believe that things happen for a reason. this is probably the first time he's decided to get back with his ex after having formed a close connection to another woman. those feelings don't just wash away. for on/off couples there is usually alot of volatility in the relationship which becomes exhausting after a while. it's up to him to decide when he's had enough....and i'm sure he will eventually.
the question is whether you will still be available to him. all i would say to you is do NOT give him understanding right now. you have a RIGHT to be angry and hurt over this cos it's actually very offensive of him to openly choose his ex over you.
and tell him to quit fucking crying....what's HE got to cry about??
grrrrrrrrrr.
to me his body language reeks of him wanting me whereas he barely acknowledges his gf in public. but at the end of the day, i don't want a man who can't make up his mind. one who makes you feel you have to somehow outdo an ex to make yourself worthy enough for them to actually leave them behind for good. hell will freeze over before i become sloppy seconds.
it has hurt like hell in the past. seriously....never been hurt by a man that way before. now i just believe 'what will be, will be'. this has all been going on for over 2 years now but i never once put my life on hold for him...still won't.
it's very hard but you have to believe that things happen for a reason. this is probably the first time he's decided to get back with his ex after having formed a close connection to another woman. those feelings don't just wash away. for on/off couples there is usually alot of volatility in the relationship which becomes exhausting after a while. it's up to him to decide when he's had enough....and i'm sure he will eventually.
the question is whether you will still be available to him. all i would say to you is do NOT give him understanding right now. you have a RIGHT to be angry and hurt over this cos it's actually very offensive of him to openly choose his ex over you.
and tell him to quit fucking crying....what's HE got to cry about??
grrrrrrrrrr.
thanks guys i really appreciate your help here.as for his ex i found out shes a sagittarius. so we're both his compatible type.so last night he called and i happened to be in the shower and he called back to back 3 times.then finally leaves a vm saying that.please dont hate me i never lied tp you about my ex we have a history of 10 years and he feels obligated to give it one more try. and that he didnt plan on me.and if this doesnt work and i still want him back,he's flat out cutting her off. i called him. back and told him has caused me the worst pain ever and does not deserve any happiness then i hung up...hes coming over to get the rest of his stuff in ,2days. how should i act?
Rigomortis your absolutely right what is to be will be and my one consolation is that he will get tired of this past relationship.i feel though i should not now ofcoursie but slowly make him feel someone else is getting my loving treatment he use to getu.he is jealous when it comes to him losing out.the idea of another man taking his place may make him take a closer look at what hes lost?
ninjafish i know what ur saying is right in my head and the Aries that I am have cut men off for less. but this one got to me his compassion caring and consideration this man showed me in 4 months was overwhelming. I feel as though this is the one i should fight for. my pride wont let me though.thank you your words help 
once he has collected his things i would suggest you cut off all contact. i remember knobhead leo saying 'you will keep in touch won't you' and i thought to myself...'no, i won't actually'. the whole business about him not planning on meeting you sounds all too familiar too. sometimes i think it's easier for someone to return to someone known than to put themselves out there for someone new they're taking a chance with.
after a while it becomes quite easy letting them get on with it while you mind your own business. it's much better than seeing them out with a different women every day of the week! also you have to remember that this is the first time he's gone back to her after meeting someone else with potential. how's he gonna feel if/when he finds out you move on?
tbh, none of that matters. right now, he's not what you need. he blew it and there is absolutely no guarantee you will be single if things don't work out for him with his ex.....again.
stay angry. he deserves your anger.
after a while it becomes quite easy letting them get on with it while you mind your own business. it's much better than seeing them out with a different women every day of the week! also you have to remember that this is the first time he's gone back to her after meeting someone else with potential. how's he gonna feel if/when he finds out you move on?
tbh, none of that matters. right now, he's not what you need. he blew it and there is absolutely no guarantee you will be single if things don't work out for him with his ex.....again.
stay angry. he deserves your anger.
ninjafish thanks soo much
rigormortis thank you for the great advice.you guys are giving me the courage to face him and cut him off.I may have some setbacks.(like falling to the floor and crying infront of him when he first told me. so did he saying he's sorry)smh so ashamed of that..so im gonna keep you guys updated.
rigormortis thank you for the great advice
.you guys are giving me the courage to face him and cut him off.I may have some setbacks.(like falling to the floor and crying infront of him when he first told me. so did he saying he's sorry)smh so ashamed of that..so im gonna keep you guys updated.thanks tiziani you make a good point im just looking for any solution at this point. This is soo unlike me i'm the one who usually gives my fiends the strong relationship advice. to the point my exes call me cold since i cut them off clean no looking back. I just feel like for 32 years ive searched, dated , turned down proposals all for the one who gave me what i was looking for,....i mean i'm an ARIES it's not easy to have no arguments for 4 months with me and deal wit my fire bending ways lol...but this man, sigh this man made me so happy....
Posted by bkchk
ninjafish thanks soo much
rigormortis thank you for the great advice
your initial reaction wasn't a 'setback'. it was what you must've felt and rightly so. i hope he felt like shit.
i would agree with tiziani in that it's never a good idea to seek out someone else to make the other jealous. i do still think that you kinda have to force yourself out there soon though but more for your sake than to make him jealous. as long as you're honest with the guys you might meet about having just been hurt so badly cos it may make you reluctant to open up to them. you just have to put YOU first for a while.
also the leo will feel differently if he knows you are cutting him off if he gets back with his ex cos right now he wants you to agree to dangle on a thread which i hope you won't allow cos then he's off the hook and he doesn't deserve to be.
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