will my leo give me anothr chance

This topic was created in the Leo forum by onaxa on Sunday, September 11, 2016 and has 14 replies.
So i will describe the story short. we work together, he is 4 years younger than me. we havent noticed each other for 6months, then started dating and been together for 4 months, after that he split up with me and became fwb for 7months, now only "friends".

the reason for splitting up was that i didnt feel he wants sth serious and started losing my security. he has started losing inerest once i showed im into him (took me a bit of time as cancers dont trust easily). i had the feeling he was chasing other women (didnt like to give up to others we were together ie didnt want to add pics of us on FB, didnt show any affection around his friends, talked behind my back about problems in our relationship).

what annoyed him the most was my sending messages (tons of them - to moan, explain, say sorry etc) and that i went with my ex on holidays (was a month after we got together, he himself went for hols with family, ive told him id never cheat on anyone - and its absolutely true, besides he allowed me to go). Since then his mum started to dislike me - it didnt even help when shes met me and i helped him with stuff for his party until 2am, made his family xmas cookies, etc. Generally hes had like 10 relationships already (he is 25), and even his sister said he has committment problems.

now we still talk but whenever asked him for something he is "too busy". we went out for drinks but i felt he behaves different - the spark is missing. he has admitted he is afraid to meet with me because i all the time want to get back together with him..i still see how mch fun we have together (he said im the only woman that makes him laugh a lot, feels comfortable around me), he gets jeleous when he hears i meet with someone and keeps coming at work to chat, laugh etc.

he says he doesnt want a relationship at the moment, is happy being single. whenever i mention sth about rel he gets annoyed. soon one of us will probably go to work in another city. is here any chance he would want to try something again? i know for sure leo women dont come back (i have a few leo gfs), not sure how it is with the guys

He already said he doesn't want a relationship
yeah i know atm, but wonder if theres any chance he might come back in the future as i wrote - we understood each other really well but there was a bit of damage we both did
Posted by onaxa
yeah i know atm, but wonder if theres any chance he might come back in the future as i wrote - we understood each other really well but there was a bit of damage we both did
Hence, he said he doesn't want a relationship
Thanks Sssupes

so you mean theres no chance at the moment as he wants nothing or at all (as too many bad things happend)?

whenever i ignore him at work he comes and keeps checking on me and he gets jel when i talk about other guys or when i say im going away he wants to know everything - its quite confusing..
@onaxa, Never give up. If you believed what you felt, that's your intuition. Cancer, Scorp, Pisces has good intuition. If you felt it be assured it is truth. May be the time is not right. So just chill and focus on yourself, and think positive. Never lose sight of your vision. Make a wish before this 16th Sept eclipse and chant it like a mantra.

Do not think negative, just positives only. Karma is a thing.

Don't give up on yourself. Last thing you wanna do is lose faith in yourself.

Um...


'what annoyed him the most was ... that i went with my ex on holidays

(was a month after we got together, he himself went for hols with family...

... besides he allowed me to go). '




Really?

Going on Holiday with family is NOTHING like going on Holiday with the

person you used to sleep with.

There is no comparison.

'Allowing' you to go... what was he supposed to do?

He was probably astounded you even *wanted* to... I wouldn't have

stood for it-- even after four weeks of relationship.

I feel like we aren't getting the whole story on that, but yeah... this is

where you screwed up.

I just ...


User Submitted Image


can't lol








@Montgomery: Im not going to give you much more details and your comment is rude, I didnt describe my story to be judged on here. I know I (probably) did a mistake and learned from it. It was a trip for my bday, I wasnt in love in the new guy (cancers need time) and still remain friends with ex (weve been together 8years), also I am not a cheater type and not easily interested in someone. At that time it was my only possibility to go on hols with someone, if I didnt I would not have gone last year at all, and guess what - this year noone to come with as well (I dont fancy going with gfs for 2weeks hols)

Funny he didnt leave me at that time but few months after and still spent time with me also being my fwb for another 8months


@LeoSunPiscesMoon:

Many thanks for your valuable comment, I feel he is the right guy, just still seems to be easily influenced by others and iimmature. We laugh a lot, he is feely-touchy around me, said can read me like a book and the only guy I could imagine to have a famiy with..I hope he will give me a chance..
@onaxa, time is a great healer. Don't push him too much, just be around him. Keep email, text to minimum - once every 2-3 days, unless something real urgent (not about your emotions).

Idea here is to (a) let him know that you are NOT seeing anyone, and is single. But also don't over do it. (b) Let him miss you. He will, he's a freaking Leo.

Big Grin
Posted by onaxa
@Montgomery: Im not going to give you much more details and your comment is rude, I didnt describe my story to be judged on here. I know I (probably) did a mistake and learned from it. It was a trip for my bday, I wasnt in love in the new guy (cancers need time) and still remain friends with ex (weve been together 8years), also I am not a cheater type and not easily interested in someone. At that time it was my only possibility to go on hols with someone, if I didnt I would not have gone last year at all, and guess what - this year noone to come with as well (I dont fancy going with gfs for 2weeks hols)

Funny he didnt leave me at that time but few months after and still spent time with me also being my fwb for another 8months



User Submitted Image


weve been together 8years...

You're still together?

---

At that time it was my only possibility to go on hols with someone,

if I didnt I would not have gone last year at all, and guess what - this

year noone to come with as well



This is not a tragedy. o.O

Yes, I'm totally judging you-- I can't help it.

I would want someone to tell me if I was behaving this way-- it was hardly

rude though, considering the fact that it was the truth.



He'll probably be content staying FWB as long as you allow it, but don't

let yourself believe that it's anything other than that... it's rare that those

types of relationships evolve into anything more.


Good luck.



It seems to me that you were too emotional and he didn't like this. As a result, it pushed him away. Give yourself space. At least a week. No talking at all. This will give you time to distance yourself and not feel so emotional. Next time you talk to him, be chill. Be a friend. Not a crazy ex.
@pinkbird03 @LeoSunPiscesMoon Thanks for your advice.

The problem is I see him daily but soon (in 2 weeks) moving to a different part of the floor, so wont see him at all. When he was in a good mood he said "of course he will miss me" but once I annoyed him he made a rude comment that he hopes it will finally happen (as been postponed for weeks). Anyway I feel he will move out to another city soon (as already searching for a job and having interviews). I am trying to be nice and a good friend - always polite while chatting and we make each other laugh. I share with him my food (he loves my sweets) and then he feeds me with them and generally is feely-touchy.

You are right I get too emotional - after a few days of "all good" I want "more" and then start to moan that he only misuses me, comes whenever he wants, takes my food without asking, never there for me despite me being a good friend.. and then he gets annoyed (also when I am really angry I start bombarding him with messages/emails). I get annoyed as its only me asking him to spend lunch together - go for a walk etc, he never does it

Do you advice me to backoff 100% and also not asking to spend lunches together or better to try to meet and have a laugh. I have learnt (and read in a book) that I should start hold back my emotions, moaning, texting no matter how annoyed i am and how misused i feel..What he said is he likes me a lot and could be with me as I have a lovely caring side but then start moaning and annoy (and I obviously do it because dissapointed he doesnt want more despite that we understand each other so well)

I feel as well he is going through something as much more stressed, and knowing him for a long time I can see it in his face

I started to concentrate more on myself - do more sport, diet, hobbies..I hope there is still a chance.

Also one of you mentoned I should give him a sign I am still single. Should I mention I am seeing other people to make him jel or not at all? Thanks
so the update is he has been coming over to my desk last week, following me to the common kitchen, being flirty and touchy, feeding me with food,,when I got annoyed with him not replying to my message, he came over to check on me

this week hes cold and distant - didnt even say hello to me..

i dont think this is a normal behvaiour..?
@onaxa, mood swing. Something triggered it. Perhaps you getting annoyed @ him.

Mercury retrograde effect. Just let this phase pass. It's on 22nd mercury starts to go direct.

This retrograde is on Virgo month, so he is going though his past experiences and thoughts and thinking over it since Aug 28. He will need time to think. Wait for it. 22nd Sept ..

Whatever he decides after 22nd, is his final decision. And hopefully you are in it. smile Good luck