age difference and dating

This topic was created in the Libra forum by Pride of 0ctober on Friday, February 18, 2011 and has 41 replies.
What is the biggest age gap u would allow for yourself when dating? im 22, i would not go under 20, and woudnt go too far over early 30's. But u never know, its sumthin about those cougars

but what is your limit, whats th youngest and the oldest you would date?
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5 years uh?, i dont really have a limit on whats the oldest like a woman i nher 30's b/c i neve dated a 30 somthing year old. So i cant really say how id react to one, as far as a relationship, i doubt it b/c mentally would be dominatd most likely and then the gap. but dating, yea i would. Its some hot ass women in their 30's

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Posted by BelovedAssata
I'll just keep rocking my converse

You aren't mocking chucks are you?! Tongue
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yeeeaaa i see your point especially on the club thing it is awakward going to a club with someon who cant even get in, kinda fucks up the whole night
i found from my experience, that younger women like 19 or 20 they tend to go from 0-60 in a heatbeat or might just do it to manipulate a situation but i have had bad expereinces with that

the 30's thing, i guess im speaking from sexual attraction and i guess those relationships never last but im just kind of curious. It probably would be a lttle weird but i cant esape the idea of trying it
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As to the original question, I couldn't go much younger... I'm 30 and my son will be 10 this year. I've seen a lot of people say 10 years isn't that bad but no way I could go 10 years younger. Dating a 20 y/o would feel like robbing the cradle plus she'd only be 10 years older than my boy... it'd just be weird. A couple years younger isn't a big deal but I don't know. As for older, I'm not sure. I've never really tried to put a number on it. Perhaps it's a bit of my male chauvinism coming out but I think I should be older than her lol.
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No real limit to me; depends on their personality, mental connection, mutual & shared interests, etc.
Oldest I've dated: 10 years older
Youngest I've dated: 7 years younger
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May I play? My whole life I preferred my own age and everyone I dated was no more than 2 years younger or 3 years older. But there's a 12-year difference between my husband and me.
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Posted by Whimsy
there's a 12-year difference between my husband and me.


Who is older, you or him?
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Me. Makes me a cougar, I suppose- LOL!-but HE pursued ME. Besides, he's an old man inside (Scorpio) and I'm just a big kid.
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Lol I wasn't passing judgment or anything, just curious. You're happy with your man and that's more important than age anyway... you cougar...
Tongue
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Posted by LibraSid
Lol I wasn't passing judgment or anything, just curious. You're happy with your man and that's more important than age anyway... you cougar...
Tongue


Winking

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Posted by aquagirl24
Posted by Pride of 0ctober
What is the biggest age gap u would allow for yourself when dating? im 22, i would not go under 20, and woudnt go too far over early 30's. But u never know, its sumthin about those cougars

but what is your limit, whats th youngest and the oldest you would date?


before my young 3 year older libran bf, i was with a 22 years older taurus guy and a 15 years older capri guy. the libran bf is more mature than both of them lol. funny aint it? but the taurean had material stability, was emotionally unstable.
the libran can be materially stable if he wants to. he is tryin to NOW lol. and thats good x
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how was it? i bet it was some control issues

i worked with a woman my age last year and she is married to a 40 sum odd year old man and has had his child and she said he stalks her like crazy, he would park across from the job(cause we worked overnight)and watch and make sure she was at work and not cheating

kinda bizarre but i guess its an ideal relationship when the age gap is that wide
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Posted by THEKingofLibra
Date? 20-30.
Hookup? If she may vote and doesnt have dementia.



i like the ones with dementia, it makes role playing seem real, "where is your man at", "i dont know" how genuine
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thats the good part of aquarius people, they show no shame and like and respect that about aquas. I figured the capricorn would be the more controlling one, all cardinal signs are controlling in their own little way and are selfish

i was curious about how it worked out for you, i admire your attitude how you didnt care, thats what draws libras to aquas so i gotta give you props for that

i didnt mean to laugh at the arithis thing tho lol how is he today
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Posted by aquagirl24
ive been selfish in a few words. but i tried to give him back as much love as i could. i was there for him, he lost mom and brother same year i was his gf i left him after i helped him xxx also found him a gf x



yea it is very hard to leave someone when they are going thru a crisis, air signs dont get enough credit for how we ont leave you if you truly need emotional support we do have morals
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wtf, but you woul date a 17 year old? and its not bullshit its personal preference. Love come from the soul and all that good shit but it has limits. i wouldnt just go fall in love with sme teenager, that jsut shows how fearful you are of a woman so you pick someone you can dominate and to uphold this people will color and hide the ugly of it with the word love. there is no wa a grown man can love a 17 year old in a healthy way, at all

the difference is a ned to dominate and feel some sort of control rather then jsut accepting someone for who they are. I just cant do i. im 22 and i i wouldnt touch a 17 year old, its the prinicple
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Posted by aquagirl24
Posted by Cadillac
Posted by LibraSid
As to the original question, I couldn't go much younger... I'm 30 and my son will be 10 this year. I've seen a lot of people say 10 years isn't that bad but no way I could go 10 years younger. Dating a 20 y/o would feel like robbing the cradle plus she'd only be 10 years older than my boy... it'd just be weird. A couple years younger isn't a big deal but I don't know. As for older, I'm not sure. I've never really tried to put a number on it. Perhaps it's a bit of my male chauvinism coming out but I think I should be older than her lol.


I'm really curious and I just have one question, LS. Do you feel like if you did not have a son then would the age not matter?


u know what he meant. dont play dumb. he meant it's wrong. his son is 10 he cant date a woman who's between his son and him, thats just absurd! c'mon!
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He knows what I was saying. I said both that me at 30 dating a 20 would feel like robbing the cradle AND that because my son is 10, dating a 20 year old would be weird. He is asking if I didn't have a 10 year old son if I would still think it weird.
The answer, yes. 20 would still be too young. I doubt I'd have anything in common with someone that much younger than me. If I didn't have a 10 year old, my range would probably go lower than it does having him, but still not that far.
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i thought u meant u like younger women, i guess i didnt read your post hard enough
want to se what its like b/c i havent dated a woman in her 30's and im jut cuious but it could be nothing more than something sexual in me that is seekign out an aolder woman ho knows

watws your relationship with an older woman like if you dont mind sharing
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Posted by aquagirl24
it is defo chauvinism!!! do you know what is the real meaning of chauvinism? where does it come from? have a look on the net you should find the original meaning x


Actually, I have no male chauvinism by the strict definitions of it. Technically Chauvinism means believing that a group you belong to is better than the other group. Therefor male chauvinism would be a belief that men are better than women. I don't believe that (unless we're talking about peeing while standing up, sorry ladies we ARE better at that).
If you loosen the strict technical definition and use it how most people understand it, it's more about gender roles than a belief that men are better. I don't think a man should hit a woman even if she hits him first. That is an anti feminist viewpoint technically. If a male stranger walked up to me on the street and punched me, I'd swing back. If it was a woman, I wouldn't... why? If you get way down into it, THAT IS chauvinism as most people understand it.
Men and women ARE different. Women ARE the 'fairer' sex. It doesn't mean they aren't capable of most things we can do (just as men are capable of most things women can do), it just means we are different. When I occasionally joke about something I do being chauvinistic, it doesn't men are better than women it just means that the man should take out the trash... that's his job.
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I've come to learn that age is a mind over matter....if you don't mind it doesn't matter!...if that one person can stimulate you mind body & soul and live up to a best friend..why not?..don't let a number make that call. I seem to always attract the much younger gentleman however the who's captured my heart is 2 yrs older =)
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My first boyfriend was 12 years older than me. Yikes! My daughter's father is 13 years older than me. Now that I'm 36, I can't see myself going older than a 45 year old man, and no younger than 40. I was seeing a 38 year old guy. Now I'm like, sheez even that's too young.
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When I was 19 I was engaged to a woman who was 38 (Libra). I learned a lot! Winking However, she had a 21 year old son at the time who's wife was going to have a baby. Being a 19 year old grandfather in law or otherwise didn't sit too well with me, so I bounced. :/
~GM
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Posted by LibraLuv
A Libra woman dating someone so young?! GM you must have Gold up in dem dar hills. Tongue


More like a magic wand, Milady! Winking
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Posted by THEKingofLibra
Posted by TasteOfChaos
Posted by THEKingofLibra
Shit when I hit my 40's I'm gonna be banging ToC's 20 year old girls, for sure.



Ill make sure they are loaded with up with herpes and the clap for your pleasure...



That doesn't even make sense. You gonna give your girls herpes and clap? You either going to molest them or just straight up lick them dry. Either way, that's sick and I don't think I wanna bang any genes related to you, kthx.
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HaHaHaHaHaHa!!! Damn! That's just cruel!
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My 25-year-old sister is dating a 50-year-old man. I'm the only one who knows it, and I'm not sure how I feel about it, yet (she has asked me how I feel), because I haven't met him. My mom doesn't know they're dating, but has noticed his interest in my sister and is furious. The man has two sons the age of my sister, and my mom (she's single) has decided she should ask him for a date with one of them!
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who really gives a fuck
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Meh, I dont know how to answer this. I prefer my guy to be older of course (Statistically, men are 2 years behind women of the same age), but my guy is a few days younger than me, so..
I don't even consider this until there is a propensity of a relationship with a person. But I don't date younger, and I don't need casual sex so that's a mo0t point for me.
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I'd say that when I was seeing my Mr. Libra, he's 4 years behind me emotionally. I had to wait a long time for him to act maturely. Yes we're the same age.
"I've reached my full maturity by 19."
Sexual maturity, not emotional maturity?
"Usually it's 29, because come 30 they're pretty treetrunked in some cases, 'scuse the barbarism"
Astrology is not above statistics? 29-30 is the Saturn return..
there are many contexts for this.. it's hard to debate when there's pseudoscience in the mix.
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Posted by THEKingofLibra
Posted by spica
.



As psychology would suggest, men reach deeper moral level than women can. And as far as I know, I've reached my full maturity by 19.

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And dude, I can debate psychology with you, no problem, but you have to pull out the journal article you got it from and I'll pull out others. But remember this is an astrology forum so anything scientific is laughable anyway.
But I'd still maintain that men are emotionally 2 yrs (plus minus) behind women, that's why in general, their partners are younger.
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Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by spica
I'd say that when I was seeing my Mr. Libra, he's 4 years behind me emotionally. I had to wait a long time for him to act maturely. Yes we're the same age.
"I've reached my full maturity by 19."
Sexual maturity, not emotional maturity?
"Usually it's 29, because come 30 they're pretty treetrunked in some cases, 'scuse the barbarism"
Astrology is not above statistics? 29-30 is the Saturn return..
there are many contexts for this.. it's hard to debate when there's pseudoscience in the mix.


So how did you gauge your man was 4 years behind you emotionally ?
It's a personal and somewhat grandiose attitude to take from your stance, don't you think ?
It's okay, almost everyone thinks higher of themselves in this situation, self preservation more than anything statistical or pseudo. smile
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Okay okay, he's 4 years ahead of me emotionally.. now does that make more sense? Winking
Big Grin
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He's ahead of me professionally and intellectually Big Grin
Emotionally, he takes his time to grow up.
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The oldest I've dated was 41 and I'm 27, when we started though I was 24. youngest 1 year younger. I discovered I like older men.
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Its up to the people involved.
If he's 20 years older and she doesn't care so what or if she is older so what.
The problem comes from people around them not so much from them.
Lets say she is 20 and he is 40.
they hook up get married live together this might be great for several years.
Then one day she knows hes old and she is in her prime.
Big problem or the other way around she was 40 he was 20 now she is 60 and he is 40.
I have no answer but that seems to be where the problems start.
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Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by spica
He's ahead of me professionally and intellectually Big Grin
Emotionally, he takes his time to grow up.


aka A man.
What's the point if you don't quite have to just yet ?
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Pieter pan. I wish there was a note on people's backs saying "I'm grown" and
.."not ready yet"..
I mean, things will be so much easier. Big Grin
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^Eh? It wasn't a jibe or anything. I wasn't being bitter. I don't really understand your reference to holy grail and ginger beard Sad.

You see, Girl thinks guy can be ready. But guy is not. So the games begin. It would be more clear cut if there was some sort of note. But it would spoil the fun and save plenty heartaches.
I don't really know what I'm talking about, because alot of times, Men (and/or women) need the experience of games to be able to grow emotionally and understand themselves. Sort of like a prereq.
Pieter Pan syndrome befalls most men anyways.. it's hip to be young and freeeee!
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I've never dated younger or older than me. Always the same age. Weird huh?
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i used to date mostly older guys. not because i wanted to. i was just being less picky and dating whoever was into me and seemed decent, was cute, etc. all worthless douchebags in the end.
i like younger guys. i've always liked younger guys. even when i was younger. i remember my middle school crush was the same grade as me, but he was a cancer. 9 months younger. i never liked older guys. i'd have older guys giving me attention, and they were wasting their time. i thought girls who had much older boyfriends were an embarrassment, whoring themselves out to somebody just to get driven around in his car or whatever. and meanwhile, the guy would be getting off on the cheap, because girls his own age expected a lot more from him than the young girls did. a few years ago, i'd let older guys take me out to nice restaurants, and they never got anything more than a hug and "thanks" from me. because i didn't owe it to them. a woman their own age wouldn't have felt like she owed them anything, but they expected me to be all impressed by it. psh. if the old guy would rather have a hot young girl without any baggage, he should spend more time, energy, and yes money on her. like to the old perv, the 24 year old is like a diamond and the 42 year old is a quartz. the quartz costs $ 20 bucks worth of his time, effort, and money. meanwhile, the diamond can be had for $ 15, and maybe you can even bargain down if she has low self esteem or daddy issues. fuck that. i'm not wasting my young on some gross old man who gets a win-win by dating younger.
i'm 26. i'll check out younger guys, but the idea of getting involved at all with anyone younger than maybe 22 seems totally sick.
the thing is, younger guys who LIKE older girls (i'm southern. i say "girls") are usually the ones that have their shit together. they're the ones who were working full time while they were still in high school. they were the ones who had 10, 20, 30 year plans when they were 15. they've been adults since before their voice changed. they don't LIKE young girls who just want to party and play around. even if these guys aren't looking to settle down yet, they are looking for a mature relationship. and i like that.
the older guys i've dated (the oldest was a 5 year difference: 28 when i was 23) were assholes. extremely immature, lots of mindgames and double speak. accused me of acting childish when they were acting childish.
stopping there. don't want to extend to 2 posts.
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Posted by everevolvingepithet
"Pieter Pan syndrome befalls most men anyways.. it's hip to be young and freeeee!"
It's not Peter Pan syndrome, it's Mr.Man syndrome. smile


Meh. Not all men like to be swinging bachelors..
I see it as not knowing what they want just yet (bitter, maybe?)
Statistically (aw not again!) or shall I say scientific research found that men in the throes of coupledom (AKA married) have more happiness than swingin' bachelors. In general and on the whole.
Everyone needs to be loved after the fun and excitement dies down - you only get fun, sexual fulfillment and a bit of kissx2 here there as a peterpan (or Mr Man)
Plenty men want a committed r'ship, but at their own time. The trick for girls who don't like to play is to identify them.
Freedom is but a state of mind. As earthlings trapped in a fixed body, we aren't free anyways. sumtimes, commitment is freedom because one no longer has to fight themselves or their fear of commitment.
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That said, I don't think my Lib gets his ego from being single and unattached. He was majorly confused and the time wasn't right. And we had detractors acting full-on. Plus he prided himself on being intellectual and never got round to actually understanding his own feelings thinking they'll make him lose control (but the opposite is true actually). However, he's a loyal and extreme sentimentalist. Once we got together (albeit little) he stopped bar hopping or discos, which he never liked anyway. He's domestic and very cautious. Hes the sort who'd look after people's bags while they go skydiving or parachuting. Whoops did I reveal too much? He's still Mr. Man to me. An even better one.
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18 years. Previously 12 years. Previously 8 years.
People's circumstances are different. I cannot have a satisfying conversation with people my age, or anyone less than 7 years older than me.
Conversations are as important as sex for me. There must be foreplay (manner), beef (content), climax and cooling down (the look in his eyes that our minds meet).
No I cannot have that with people less than 7 years older than me.
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Posted by Pride of 0ctober
What is the biggest age gap u would allow for yourself when dating? im 22, i would not go under 20, and woudnt go too far over early 30's. But u never know, its sumthin about those cougars
but what is your limit, whats th youngest and the oldest you would date?



lol, cougars are after 40, pumas are in 30, lol.
I think within 20s - it's 20/30, at 30s - 26/42, at 40s anywhere from 35 to 50, at 50s anywhere from 40-70.
I'm 37 and personally I would not go for a guy younger than 36 and older than 46 right now. My partner is 42.
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