Am I being too paranoid with this libra guy?
This topic was created in the Libra forum by nbtts on Wednesday, March 20, 2013 and has 14 replies.
Well I posted this before about he invited me to go on holiday with him and then I spent time with him for 2 weeks. It was great we got along so well.
He told me about his ex family and friends. And they also knows that he spending time with me. Hes pretty open even on facebook. There was a time we didn't understand each other then he opened up to me how he actually is. Told me about his insecurity and stuff. I think that is a good sign.He went back to the city with me. We spent a couple days together it was a nice moment. We held hands all the time. he wants to continue travel to another country for about a month then he will be back for good. He never promise me anything but he's really sweet. Before he left this time he told me that hopefully he will be back soon. Take care. And be good. I told him that too. He rolled his eyes and laugh. So I wasn't sure if "be good" means something like dont hook up with other guys and be faithful to him. Well at this point we aren't exclusive yet.
After he arrived his next destination he messaged me and asked me if I'm coped without him. He added my friends in Facebook too.
Its been just like 3 days. I miss him a lot. I tweeted "miss your voice" then he favourited that Then undo it. Haha well i asked him why he said he did it By accident. And asked me if that tweet was about him then isaif yes. he always message me in the morning and before bed time. Like he messages me in the morning and tells me what's he going to do today and before bed he asks me how my day was and tells me how those things he done each day. He doesn't like drinking and he's not party much. He quite shy and laid back. Like after travel one day he told me he got lots of new friends and they want him to out for drink and he didn't want to go. He just want to sleep. But I told him to go. After he went he messaged me and told me that he didn't enjoy the night. Yesterday he didn't messaged me in the evening. I was a bit worried and saw this morning on his twitter saying that he went to bed at 3 in the morning. He messaged me this morning too but he didn't say what he did last night or telling me anything about what's he going to do today.
I don't know if I'm being paranoid. I know that we aren't exclusive but is it ok if he's having someone there? I know he's not like that but it is easy to think. Or I'm just being too worried I dated a libra before they are kinda charming! It's hard to believe!
He told me about his ex family and friends. And they also knows that he spending time with me. Hes pretty open even on facebook. There was a time we didn't understand each other then he opened up to me how he actually is. Told me about his insecurity and stuff. I think that is a good sign.He went back to the city with me. We spent a couple days together it was a nice moment. We held hands all the time. he wants to continue travel to another country for about a month then he will be back for good. He never promise me anything but he's really sweet. Before he left this time he told me that hopefully he will be back soon. Take care. And be good. I told him that too. He rolled his eyes and laugh. So I wasn't sure if "be good" means something like dont hook up with other guys and be faithful to him. Well at this point we aren't exclusive yet.
After he arrived his next destination he messaged me and asked me if I'm coped without him. He added my friends in Facebook too.
Its been just like 3 days. I miss him a lot. I tweeted "miss your voice" then he favourited that Then undo it. Haha well i asked him why he said he did it By accident. And asked me if that tweet was about him then isaif yes. he always message me in the morning and before bed time. Like he messages me in the morning and tells me what's he going to do today and before bed he asks me how my day was and tells me how those things he done each day. He doesn't like drinking and he's not party much. He quite shy and laid back. Like after travel one day he told me he got lots of new friends and they want him to out for drink and he didn't want to go. He just want to sleep. But I told him to go. After he went he messaged me and told me that he didn't enjoy the night. Yesterday he didn't messaged me in the evening. I was a bit worried and saw this morning on his twitter saying that he went to bed at 3 in the morning. He messaged me this morning too but he didn't say what he did last night or telling me anything about what's he going to do today.
I don't know if I'm being paranoid. I know that we aren't exclusive but is it ok if he's having someone there? I know he's not like that but it is easy to think. Or I'm just being too worried I dated a libra before they are kinda charming! It's hard to believe!
Hi! Are you new here? I am, kinda. Not really... I used to get into a LOT of trouble here back in '09. May i ask, what's your sign? I'm a libra myself, so i'm gonna offer some of my insight! I hope this helps!
So, it sounds to me that maybe he's getting distant on you, huh? Well, though i don't have a lot of personal experience with libra men, I can tell you that when I get like this with people close to me, it's often seen as me getting "Weird" for no reason. Maybe you said something to make him feel insecure about your potential for a real relationship. Now, i'm not saying you did anything wrong, we librans have the nasty habit of hearing what we want to hear, but we can't admit to this fact at all! So maybe he read you wrong. which can be dangerous because words go a lot deeper for us than we let others know. On the surface we may seem charming, flighty, upbeat and never bothered, but if our feelings are hurt, we are far less likely to speak up about it, and we'l internalize our emotions. Then, we go into relect mode. We librans are ALWAYS relecting on something, whether it's deep, or superficial. Even when it looks like we have our heads in the clouds, we're probably doing some critical thinking. This is one step in how we try to keep things in balance. Depending on how far we might be bothered, after the reflection phase, we start to become distant. Because we can't tell you why we're bothered, maybe because we feel things might go wrong if we do, harmony might be disrupted. So this is a big risk for us. And, we get frustrated when we can't figure out why we're so bothered, especially after all the reflection. it's a vicious cycle. I say, tell him how you feel. COMMUMICATE! But wait to do it in person, or over the phone. Social media tends to leave out a lot of natural signals and emotional queues that occur during face to face interaction. Start by laying your cards out on the table, which might make him feel more at ease doing the same. Of course with men it's harder because they aren't used to talking about feelings the way most women are, so maybe you should expect more smoke and clouds from him before a breakthrough. Keep in mind, all of this could be over the smallest, dumbest little comment, we are some SERIOUS drama queens! We put ourselves though all of this over nothing, it's actually quite silly. We make things quite difficult and complicated for ourselves and our family unnessecarily because of this. It isn't easy being with a libra.
So, it sounds to me that maybe he's getting distant on you, huh? Well, though i don't have a lot of personal experience with libra men, I can tell you that when I get like this with people close to me, it's often seen as me getting "Weird" for no reason. Maybe you said something to make him feel insecure about your potential for a real relationship. Now, i'm not saying you did anything wrong, we librans have the nasty habit of hearing what we want to hear, but we can't admit to this fact at all! So maybe he read you wrong. which can be dangerous because words go a lot deeper for us than we let others know. On the surface we may seem charming, flighty, upbeat and never bothered, but if our feelings are hurt, we are far less likely to speak up about it, and we'l internalize our emotions. Then, we go into relect mode. We librans are ALWAYS relecting on something, whether it's deep, or superficial. Even when it looks like we have our heads in the clouds, we're probably doing some critical thinking. This is one step in how we try to keep things in balance. Depending on how far we might be bothered, after the reflection phase, we start to become distant. Because we can't tell you why we're bothered, maybe because we feel things might go wrong if we do, harmony might be disrupted. So this is a big risk for us. And, we get frustrated when we can't figure out why we're so bothered, especially after all the reflection. it's a vicious cycle. I say, tell him how you feel. COMMUMICATE! But wait to do it in person, or over the phone. Social media tends to leave out a lot of natural signals and emotional queues that occur during face to face interaction. Start by laying your cards out on the table, which might make him feel more at ease doing the same. Of course with men it's harder because they aren't used to talking about feelings the way most women are, so maybe you should expect more smoke and clouds from him before a breakthrough. Keep in mind, all of this could be over the smallest, dumbest little comment, we are some SERIOUS drama queens! We put ourselves though all of this over nothing, it's actually quite silly. We make things quite difficult and complicated for ourselves and our family unnessecarily because of this. It isn't easy being with a libra.
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Quit worrying so much. He's bound to have his hiccup days. Only be worried if it becomes a consistent pattern.
I've had a few of these moments with the one I'm seeing right now because he can be hard to read sometimes. I keep it to myself and he turns around and does something that reassures me. He just has his moments. Remember, guys are dingbats. If they're busy, or juggling a lot of things at once, they get all space cadet.
I've had a few of these moments with the one I'm seeing right now because he can be hard to read sometimes. I keep it to myself and he turns around and does something that reassures me. He just has his moments. Remember, guys are dingbats. If they're busy, or juggling a lot of things at once, they get all space cadet.
Miss Furry: yes i'm new. and i'm Sagittarius. i think you are right maybe because i'm pretty straight forward. there was a time that i feel insecure with him because he hanging out with me but he's on his tablet laughing about something this girl(his ex)inboxed him and he kept talking and i was there,waiting for him to finish.
so i just showed him that i was being pique he always know and asked me what's wrong. i told him that i don't mind him talking with any girls or his ex but i don't feel being respected,since he's with me our holiday together (and it was our last night of it) i want you to be happy with me not someone else. I told him to understand at least i think i was being reasonable cos if he kept talking to her what that make me feel. he said sorry and he started to open up to me he told me he's not good with relationship or friendship. it's hard for him to speak or know what to do . he finds that it's easier for him to be more comfortable on the internet. (although his ex knows that he's with me) he's a very good looking guy but i can see that's he is quite insecure at the first time i met him. he told me that he tries to look confident.he said maybe that's why he likes travelling just because he meets people and then he knows that it's more often that he doesnt' have to see them again.(he travel like half year at a time. i asked him why and he said he just like meeting new people at the first place)
he has a very few friends. there's one time he told me about them showed me their pictures and stories. .I think from a guy that doesn't talk that much he quite open to me.
he made me so happy even when he left for another destination this time.he told me he will come back. and i know he will just don't know when i guess approximately a month. He always messages me. he tries to let me know what is he doing with who. when i tweeted that "miss my voice" and he asked me if it was him i was like ok now i have no place to be dramatic girly anymore because you follow me there too. and he said it's ok you can do that i don't mind. He said he was surprised because he talks very little. i said i know thts why it's so becoming of him.the next day i tweeted in another language and when we were messaging this morning he asked me if i start to tweet in another language so he wouldn't understand and asked me what i say. so i called him mr speak-so-little-mouth. so he called me little miss attitude. i don't think that was it though.
so i just showed him that i was being pique he always know and asked me what's wrong. i told him that i don't mind him talking with any girls or his ex but i don't feel being respected,since he's with me our holiday together (and it was our last night of it) i want you to be happy with me not someone else. I told him to understand at least i think i was being reasonable cos if he kept talking to her what that make me feel. he said sorry and he started to open up to me he told me he's not good with relationship or friendship. it's hard for him to speak or know what to do . he finds that it's easier for him to be more comfortable on the internet. (although his ex knows that he's with me) he's a very good looking guy but i can see that's he is quite insecure at the first time i met him. he told me that he tries to look confident.he said maybe that's why he likes travelling just because he meets people and then he knows that it's more often that he doesnt' have to see them again.(he travel like half year at a time. i asked him why and he said he just like meeting new people at the first place)
he has a very few friends. there's one time he told me about them showed me their pictures and stories. .I think from a guy that doesn't talk that much he quite open to me.
he made me so happy even when he left for another destination this time.he told me he will come back. and i know he will just don't know when i guess approximately a month. He always messages me. he tries to let me know what is he doing with who. when i tweeted that "miss my voice" and he asked me if it was him i was like ok now i have no place to be dramatic girly anymore because you follow me there too. and he said it's ok you can do that i don't mind. He said he was surprised because he talks very little. i said i know thts why it's so becoming of him.the next day i tweeted in another language and when we were messaging this morning he asked me if i start to tweet in another language so he wouldn't understand and asked me what i say. so i called him mr speak-so-little-mouth. so he called me little miss attitude. i don't think that was it though.
rockyroadicecream : I think i'm being too worried as well but i just can't help it :p. before he left i told him that don't worry if i don't message you that much it's not that i don't want to trust me i want to message him all the time but i don't want to steal his time from having fun travelling especially it's what he loves to do. he said it's ok to message him. but don't make it like a job for him.
but turned out he's the one who messaged me the first time he got there in the evening and it's like that for the next days. he teased me once, kept saying that my friend is so beautiful and i should tell her that he said so. i was being a bit annoyed and i guess he knew so he was like obviously i like you i don't want you to be annoyed with this conversation. i don't want to upset you and i want to see your beautiful smile when i come back.
I acted the same by sending picture of my food to him and he sent his back. it's just a bit weird that he didn't update me what's he doing today that's all. it's just that he online at 2 last night and then went to sleep. and he's not a kind of person who goes to bed at 2.
this happend before though when he was on holidays last time. there's this girl that he said to his friends that he will stay at her dorm on Facebook then he deleted it.I didn't asked him why he deleted it. but when I met him I met the girl too and it was nothing. and that time he didn't talk to me like 2-3 days.
I guess i could of just wait for him to message me. and i think he will. he knows that my job is boring and nothing. so it's nothing much from my side is so excited. :p
but turned out he's the one who messaged me the first time he got there in the evening and it's like that for the next days. he teased me once, kept saying that my friend is so beautiful and i should tell her that he said so. i was being a bit annoyed and i guess he knew so he was like obviously i like you i don't want you to be annoyed with this conversation. i don't want to upset you and i want to see your beautiful smile when i come back.
I acted the same by sending picture of my food to him and he sent his back. it's just a bit weird that he didn't update me what's he doing today that's all. it's just that he online at 2 last night and then went to sleep. and he's not a kind of person who goes to bed at 2.
this happend before though when he was on holidays last time. there's this girl that he said to his friends that he will stay at her dorm on Facebook then he deleted it.I didn't asked him why he deleted it. but when I met him I met the girl too and it was nothing. and that time he didn't talk to me like 2-3 days.
I guess i could of just wait for him to message me. and i think he will. he knows that my job is boring and nothing. so it's nothing much from my side is so excited. :p
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Chill. Estrogen sucks, but chill.
Honestly, from what you have told me he seems to be into you. A guy who is not only open about his insecurties but is aware of himself like that... Pretty rare. I don't think you are paranoid or worring too much, you feel how you feel, and it's clear that you feel for him. If i were you, drop him a note every so often when he's away letting him know that you understand where he is coming from, the more librans feel understood, the better they function in a relationship. It's good that you told him that you didn't feel respected on the date, but keep in mind some men aren't used to women being direct and setting certain boundaries. Otherwise he wouldn't have been on his tablet at all during the date. Which is rude, no matter who he is talking to, in my opinion. I think he likes you, and you seem to like him. I think for now you should just chalk it up to dopey guy crap, unless he makes a pattern of this, as rockyroadicecream stated previously. If he does, this shows that he is not as mature as he might seem. But I think it's too soon to tell. Definetely watch for a pattern with him, but at this point the ball is in his court. When he gets back to you, if he sounds too cryptic and distant... And it TRUELY bothers you... You just can't put it out of your mind, address it in your reply to him. Don't shove things like that aside.
Missfury91 : i just sent him a link of some place that i want to go to him and told him that come back! so we can go there. he said it looks beautiful and he love to go. i asked him if he's going to come back here for a festival he said hes not sure he want to finish there so he doesn't have to go back there again. i said "i understand 
and that's a fake smile" then he said "he understand that one is real" i think he knows that i understand him even i'm sad not seeing him. because i love travelling too. hes not on his tablet all the time though we were having a whole week holiday together and he was just checking time to time when we got wifi but that one was a bit too long :p
i know it's soon to tell too. I'm pretty sure he will message me again. but if he get too busy like a couple of day i'd send him something like that ask him how's it like.
maybe he feels like its a routine to him to message me now. I just get used to it that's why i feel weird. I like him yes and i'm sure he knows that, i'm being pretty clear. i know he likes me too or else he wouldn't message me so often whilst his vacation. but i just don't know how long he will be gone. and what else could ruin a good thing we have together. since we never have a talk before that we would wait around for each other.
only he said before he left "hopefully i will see you soon. be good"
and that's a fake smile" then he said "he understand that one is real" i think he knows that i understand him even i'm sad not seeing him. because i love travelling too. hes not on his tablet all the time though we were having a whole week holiday together and he was just checking time to time when we got wifi but that one was a bit too long :pi know it's soon to tell too. I'm pretty sure he will message me again. but if he get too busy like a couple of day i'd send him something like that ask him how's it like.
maybe he feels like its a routine to him to message me now. I just get used to it that's why i feel weird. I like him yes and i'm sure he knows that, i'm being pretty clear. i know he likes me too or else he wouldn't message me so often whilst his vacation. but i just don't know how long he will be gone. and what else could ruin a good thing we have together. since we never have a talk before that we would wait around for each other.
only he said before he left "hopefully i will see you soon. be good"
Maybe he's just really busy, or sometimes people get lazy when it comes to messages or texting. I know I do, but I'm more into phone or face to face interaction when it's a social type of thing. I can see why you would feel a little worried, if I were in your position, I would propose becoming exclusive after he gets back. Then, if he starts to get stupid and play games with you, you'll know what he's about. Also, I think the "Hopefully" thing was just how some say goodbye, I mean, anything can happen when traveling, and some people DON'T come back to see their loved ones... If you know what I mean? I really hope things work out with you and this guy! I wish you luck, girl! 
Thanks dear.
He just liked some of my friends' status in language he doesn't understand. Maybe it's a joke about my tweet earlier or he just think it would be funny
Although nothing interact with me. He haven't message me tonight. It makes me a bit upset but it's nothing that I can do. I guess I'd just wait
I know what you mean about travelling. It's good that he never promised me anything but I know he will be back eventually just don't know when.
And I guess it's his business if he's going to have other girls
I can't do anything.
He just liked some of my friends' status in language he doesn't understand. Maybe it's a joke about my tweet earlier or he just think it would be funny
Although nothing interact with me. He haven't message me tonight. It makes me a bit upset but it's nothing that I can do. I guess I'd just wait
I know what you mean about travelling. It's good that he never promised me anything but I know he will be back eventually just don't know when.
And I guess it's his business if he's going to have other girls
I can't do anything.
Rocky I love you and I don't even know you. You are a bit brutal, but you put it out so plain. I guess that is that Aries thing. LOL I think these Libra men though and how they operate gets women's panties in a bunch sometimes. Then when you do nothing at all they show you that you exist and that they may actually care.
Yeah, if he doesn't want to commit, you can't change him into it. But I do hope he gets in contact with you, personally I find those rules of "Don't contact him within a certain time limit" really stupid. You can't help that you don't have a lot occuping your mind so you think about him, that's life. So what you are anxious about interacing with him? It shows you like him, so if he continues the non-communication just shoot him a quick, "Hey what's up? Missed you and haven't heard from you lately, how's everything?" type of message.
Curiouslove1 I'm actually Sagittarius
Missfury91 yeah I don't think it's commitment thingy is the problem. I'm actually moving to another country in 4 months and he knows that.
Still we are doing this. I told him about one of my friend that like a brother to me that he's very protective and would best anyone who break my heart. It was a joke though. He smiles and hugged me and give me a kiss on my forehead. I don't have any good reason to explain this but that when I felt that he actually really cares about me.
But yea I will do that sometime in a couple day. Have been thinking tht maybe im being too worried. It's just that he got me to get used to a pattern of consistency 2 times a day contact. And I had a convo with him this morning. It's not like he gone lost or anything yet. I'm pretty sure he's not an immature guy and since we aren't exclusive yet he hooks up(hope not) with other girls shouldn't be something that bothers me.
Missfury91 yeah I don't think it's commitment thingy is the problem. I'm actually moving to another country in 4 months and he knows that.
Still we are doing this. I told him about one of my friend that like a brother to me that he's very protective and would best anyone who break my heart. It was a joke though. He smiles and hugged me and give me a kiss on my forehead. I don't have any good reason to explain this but that when I felt that he actually really cares about me.
But yea I will do that sometime in a couple day. Have been thinking tht maybe im being too worried. It's just that he got me to get used to a pattern of consistency 2 times a day contact. And I had a convo with him this morning. It's not like he gone lost or anything yet. I'm pretty sure he's not an immature guy and since we aren't exclusive yet he hooks up(hope not) with other girls shouldn't be something that bothers me.
Update!!! i cracked :p i saw he's added a new girl on facebook and this evening she tagged him that she is with him at a restaurant.and liked his friend picture but never return my comment or anything so i just messaged him on facebook being all sarcastic "aren't we talking anymore? i wont bother you.I just miss you. hope you are having fun though x" he said "We are, I'm sorry, I just don't have much time online. I'm currently trying to work out where to go next You're not bothering me I do want to talk with you, of course. I just am trying to solve this travel problem. You are not bothering me, I promise.I miss you too. I'm sorry I don't have much time to talk with you. I can only get good Wi-Fi in restaurants" and then he start to tell me about that he met this girl with another friend from other country. and we talked and flirted a bit. then i said to him that thanks for tolerating with me and made me feel better. he said i'll sweep you off your feet when the time comes and it will happen when i'm ready."
i know they were still at the restaurant when we had a conversation. he knows me pretty well that i'm pretty sensitive. i hope he's not getting bored of my emotions before he comes back. i'll try to cope though.
I guess i can trust him. at least he cares enough to make me feel better. right?
i know they were still at the restaurant when we had a conversation. he knows me pretty well that i'm pretty sensitive. i hope he's not getting bored of my emotions before he comes back. i'll try to cope though.
I guess i can trust him. at least he cares enough to make me feel better. right?
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