Gemini confused about two/three Libras

Ok well it seems I have a terrible crush on two Libra's. I don't know what the hell im doing either.

Guy #1 - Has been my friend for about three years now but apparently he doesn't really date anyone cause of his "situation". Im not sure what that "situation" is but I think its because his life isn't straight right now. It's decent but not good according to him. Hes younger, lives at home, does part time work, etc. Then one day he comes out after three years and tells me he's "depressed" but won't tell me anything about it. Makes a big deal that he even told me this tid bit of info. We are very good friends too so I feel cheated. Like wow ok I tell you everything about me but then you hold out on me. I have no idea what to do with him. Ive liked him for so long that I've already given up. He's secretive and stand offish, elusive, etc.

Guy #2 - I just met about two weeks ago. Friend to everyone, enemy to none. Very VERY good looking, younger, programmer, super smart. Hes like exactly my type. EXACTLY. But hes got so many female followers and admirers, and even a bunch of gay guys are trying to get at him. We frequent the same areas and he always says hello to me and flirts with me. Im a terrible flirt so he turns red sometimes and shy's away from me. Id really like to get to know him but hes so elusive too.

Guy #3 - Is a Libra/Scorpio cusp. Work with him actually. He's sexy as hell mostly his personality also elusive. Not my type at all looks wise but his personality is awesome AWESOME. Hes got that air coupled with Scorpio (cusp) a lot like me with my Gemini sun/merc sitting in scorpio.

Seriously what is with Libras and being so unobtainable? I know you guys like us but it's like what the hell do I do? You never EVER make the first move. You let us know youre interested but then just kinda nothing else happens. I don't even know what I should do now. LOL! Im a Gem and I thought I was bad about being elusive but NOOOO!

Posted by tiziani
I was wondering what the problem was here then I remembered you have that rule about the man making the first move. Yeah, with Libras, good luck with that 😛

The first guy sounds like my mindset 3-4 years ago. The last part describes my entire history with Geminis in a nutshell. Always been a great understanding, but just never had our hands on the spark plug at the same time.

There's a certain type of relationship we grow out of, and a certain type we grow into. I think Gemini women belong in the second camp for us Libras. They have qualities I would have taken for granted when I was younger. I still don't know where to find the ignition with a Gem though so none of that answers your question 😉 Maybe JennGem knows.

You would think I could understand better seeing my rising/moon are both in Libra but I am so so SOOOOO indecisive. Then coupled with the Taurus venus/mars makes me move slower than molasses. I sit on the idea of someone for a really long time. Hum and ha about it until I definitely get the green light as in "ok this is a definite thing, hes good to go, hes got all his shit in order, hes nice to me, great job, etc". I really annoy myself with this type of behavior because the second something negative comes up im gone like the wind. Ill sit and wait figure out if it's doable or if it's a deal breaker. I think at this point im just going to walk from all three. I need more of an aggressive type. This is why I dont usually date air signs because its like just maddening. There is only one part that should be elusive and thats me, not that I mean to do it it just is. I dont feel like understanding it when I dont even understand my own. Bring on the Leos, Aries, maybe some amazing Scorpions. These signs I like the most because they don't bullshit when they are ready for something.

Yeah ain't nobody got time for that. No sir. Im not about to chase someone down and make the first moves, not my thing. To me thats a man's job regardless of his sign. And if you don't Im not going to be fully invested or even waste my time. I like these guys yeah im crushing on them but I need that aggression otherwise I get bored of bossing you around all damn day long and I need a man not a bitch. Sorry LOL

Yeah I hope so but its nothing serious and that's Libra's fault. Im not going to chase any one of them.

Posted by tiziani
I get that. I don't think Libras like to be chased personally. We're too independent for that. I was chased a lot when I was younger but it's no coincidence those relationships didn't work out. Now I just avoid those type of women. We don't get bossed either. Or maybe it's just me cos I'm a 5th house Sun. I can't be controlled.

Some people say they know Libras in relationships that are ruled by their wives. I've never met one. But all Libras I've met like me are terrible at making the first move.

And I've had plenty of women, even most recently, tell me they prefer Aries or Leo. I think mostly because they give so much attention to the woman at all costs which is fair enough. We play it too cool, like twinkle says. Honestly when it comes to Fire sign males, the stories I hear make them seem dramatic as hell, irrational. Stalking, fighting, the whole 9 yards. I don't know where you lean on that spectrum but some women don't mind the drama and the emotion just as long as the man is all over them, paying them attention. I could never be that guy. I like my boundaries too much.

Sometimes I believe you've never been madly in love. That kind of love makes people act totally out of character, you do things you never thought of ever doing. Some embarrassing shit lol.

I also second that WaterCup. I dont think he has either but thats how Libras are. They just dont get travel that deep into the abyss. I have which embarrasses me (thank you 8th house sun/merc), but Libra's I feel like they are more in love with the idea of having someone rather than acting on it.

Dont get bent just saying! We dont want a circus act just a little determination, ambition, etc.

Posted by Xin
I also second that WaterCup. I dont think he has either but thats how Libras are. They just dont get travel that deep into the abyss. I have which embarrasses me (thank you 8th house sun/merc), but Libra's I feel like they are more in love with the idea of having someone rather than acting on it.

I don't think it has anything to do with sign tbh, it's the heart. Libras lose their shit. I believe everyone has that one relationship that got to them like no other. The game changer. It happens & it will happen.

*lose their shit too.

Posted by Xin
but Libra's I feel like they are more in love with the idea of having someone rather than acting on it.

Yeah, pretty much.

Posted by tiziani
It's not really about losing your shit or not for me. I've beeen there. I didn't say I like control, i just work on respect. I avoid movie type relationships because they always turn out dysfunctional. Both people end up playing up to a role. I dont want to be chased and i dont want to chase anyone. I'm good with making time getting to really know one another.

Have you ever chased?

Posted by tiziani
It's not really about losing your shit or not for me. I've beeen there. I didn't say I like control, i just work on respect. I avoid movie type relationships because they always turn out dysfunctional. Both people end up playing up to a role. I dont want to be chased and i dont want to chase anyone. I'm good with making time getting to really know one another.

Yeah this is a total Libra answer right here. No definitive actual yes or no. You see what im saying? Its like maybe...well...hummm...wellll ughhhh. So neutral. You dont really know its like am I in the friendzone or what? But the thing is what Tizani said is applied to everyone including the person he likes. Just want to get to know each other but stretch that out for months almost years.

E3 - I wouldnt call it bratty princess type thing. It's more that I am letting you know my rules. I feel that if a man is interested he needs to initiate. When women are interested it's no mystery. Things have changed drastically since the times where women were courted traditionally (please see other posts there were two made about this in the forums). Now men have gotten lazy and almost expect a woman to chase him. Id rather miss out on the chance because there is no way im doing this. NONE. It is your job as a man, a grown ass mature man, to let us know that you want to see more of us. I am very traditional in this aspect. Dont like it? Then find someone else whose standards are much lower and like to have women do 90/10. Not happening.

Posted by tiziani
what's the definition of chase? I don't think I have but you never know everyone has their own definition. I definitely court with all the bows and trimmings on top. She has to be open to that. If she runs away then I assume I am wasting her time and she must want to be alone.

You said you don't like to be chased & don't chase, meaning you have your own definition of what chasing is. What is it to you?

Posted by tiziani

Posted by WaterCup

Posted by tiziani
what's the definition of chase? I don't think I have but you never know everyone has their own definition. I definitely court with all the bows and trimmings on top. She has to be open to that. If she runs away then I assume I am wasting her time and she must want to be alone.

You said you don't like to be chased & don't chase, meaning you have your own definition of what chasing is. What is it to you?

to me chasing is pursuing the person at al costs not taking no for an answer. My Cancer buddy does that. He plays it by the numbers. That's just his style . And fair play to him because it bagged him the woman he wants to marry. They live happily in Germany right now. She turned him down on the phone for 3 straight months then one day she was on a train back to Liverpool from London, dead tired and took his call. She caved in and finally said yes to a date and the rest is history 😏 they're a great couple.

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Ok now that we got your definition of chasing, have you ever chased?

You will 😉

I might have to disagree with you WaterCup cause Libra's well yeah I don't think it will happen. That Libra Ive known three years, still hasnt and wont chase any female.

Posted by Xin
I might have to disagree with you WaterCup cause Libra's well yeah I don't think it will happen. That Libra Ive known three years, still hasnt and wont chase any female.

I'd have to disagree with you, Xin. We are human before we are our signs & most humans don't give up when they really want something or someone, especially men. It's in a man's dna to hunt, well unless he is feminine lol. I've seen men of all signs go all out when they really, really love someone. Those who do not chase are simply not in love yet, I believe. Like I said, love makes people to act weird.

Posted by tiziani
Haha yeah I cant see that happening but I won't argue. I couldn't respect someone if I chased them and won them over. Have you seen all the threads are here of stories where Libras are all hot for the girl then she finally gives in and the Libra doesn't want her anymore? That's what happens. You're wishing a curse on my house WC 😛

You'll find a 'game changer' 🙂

Posted by tiziani
Yeah ive been there before. Honestly just because I do something ive never done before with someone that doesnt make it special to me. People have different prorities and I'm learning mine are. Respect is high up there. I dont have to respect a woman to get down on my knees and cry for her. That's just drama to me. It can be fun in the moment but seen it all before. I'll keep an open mind though! Never know what the future holds in store

I didn't say anything about 'special'. All I say is, some people make you do things you never thought you'd do. So, never say never 😉

Posted by tiziani
Btw im not saying your relationship was "just drama" just that I've done that myself and I know myself. I know the signs of when im emotionally invested or just humouring someone for the sake of it. It's personal priorities.

Oh but it was full of drama, I'm not offended at all. We're both temperamental people. Lots of door slammings etc. Its the scorpio moons lol. I get what you mean by priorities, though. And tbh, I'll never be in a relationship like that again. I'm too old for that shit now. All I want at this stage of my life is a peaceful relationship with a dash of emotional excitement here & there because that's what I need personally or I'll get bored.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by WaterCup

Posted by tiziani
Btw im not saying your relationship was "just drama" just that I've done that myself and I know myself. I know the signs of when im emotionally invested or just humouring someone for the sake of it. It's personal priorities.

Oh but it was full of drama, I'm not offended at all. We're both temperamental people. Lots of door slammings etc. Its the scorpio moons lol. I get what you mean by priorities, though. And tbh, I'll never be in a relationship like that again. I'm too old for that shit now. All I want at this stage of my life is a peaceful relationship with a dash of emotional excitement here & there because that's what I need personally or I'll get bored.

that's pretty much how I feel. I'm too old. Drama doesn't scare me anymore. It's predictable. What scares me is consistency routine realiability and all that normal stufg. I've come full circle to seeing I've been running from that my whole life.

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I understand what you mean, 'normal' life is a toughy. Lots of adjustments to be made. You sound 'balanced' though, so maybe you'll survive it lol.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by WaterCup

Posted by tiziani
Btw im not saying your relationship was "just drama" just that I've done that myself and I know myself. I know the signs of when im emotionally invested or just humouring someone for the sake of it. It's personal priorities.

Oh but it was full of drama, I'm not offended at all. We're both temperamental people. Lots of door slammings etc. Its the scorpio moons lol. I get what you mean by priorities, though. And tbh, I'll never be in a relationship like that again. I'm too old for that shit now. All I want at this stage of my life is a peaceful relationship with a dash of emotional excitement here & there because that's what I need personally or I'll get bored.

that's pretty much how I feel. I'm too old. Drama doesn't scare me anymore. It's predictable. What scares me is consistency routine realiability and all that normal stufg. I've come full circle to seeing I've been running from that my whole life.

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Yeah the Libras that I know just run off any time I get some what controversial or just like have a difference in opinion. But it's w/ever not a big deal. I guess I just dont have time to figure out whats going on.

Posted by Xin

E3 - I wouldnt call it bratty princess type thing. It's more that I am letting you know my rules. I feel that if a man is interested he needs to initiate. When women are interested it's no mystery. Things have changed drastically since the times where women were courted traditionally (please see other posts there were two made about this in the forums). Now men have gotten lazy and almost expect a woman to chase him. Id rather miss out on the chance because there is no way im doing this. NONE. It is your job as a man, a grown ass mature man, to let us know that you want to see more of us. I am very traditional in this aspect. Dont like it? Then find someone else whose standards are much lower and like to have women do 90/10. Not happening.

Guys will never understand this because one, they aren't women, and two, their ego controls most of their decisions, including self centered thinking like being lazy about women they're interested in.

Each scenario is different, but generally, it's always a major benefit for women to allow the guy to chase because we know where we really stand. It's true interest as opposed to hit and quit it (like that thread mentioned that was posted recently about this stuff). It's not as if it doesn't benefit the guy either. He pursues and will get a definitive answer whether the interest is mutual or not. I've said it before and I'll say it again- Dating "rules" and ideals are mostly set to benefit guys. This shit where it's suddenly a "good" thing to pursue the guy isn't. It just makes it easier for guys to get laid.

Posted by Sugarfoot


I pretty much agree with WC here. Regardless of sign, I think if either of those guys is interested in the way you need them to be, they will make a move. I don't think libra men want to be chased ether. I think they just need to develop some tie to a woman first. He would have to have something with you or see something in you that set you apart from the crowd before he'd feel the need to make a move. Could be as simple as a long conversation. We need someone we can talk to.

The 1st dude is a no go. He's depressed, so he's no good for anyone right now. He needs to focus on getting his issues together.

The 2nd dude - it's too early for him to know how he feels about you for him to have made a move yet. We're slooooow.

You didn't give a lot of info about the 3rd guy.

But then like twinkle said, these are just crushes. Why not wait until you know who you really like first?

I second this. i agree with the traditional dating rules but it doesn't sound like there is a real problem with 2 and 3...seems like you kind of wanted them to immediately fall at your feet and no, most libra men won't do that. It sounds like you already know libras aren't for you- i don't blame you, the men aren't for me either, but i'd say just forget about all of them.

And about not losing our minds in love, we will go a little crazy like everyone else but we know that most of that stuff is anger and trust issues and jealousy, not love. It's not deep, it's immature and unhealthy. If it weren't for my other issues with libra guys i'd date them because i'd know they aren't going to explode if i look at another guy or demand to look through my text messages lol

I'm a libra and I chase ! a lot of women at the same time ... 🙂 lol

but !
don't panic . they know it . I am polyamorous

someone said libra are womanizer . I think it's true ......


check my profile . to know more about me . I am weird ! a lot of scorpio

Posted by muwik


check my profile . to know more about me . I am weird ! a lot of scorpio

Calm down and keep it in your pants, honey. It's just the internet.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by muwik


check my profile . to know more about me . I am weird ! a lot of scorpio

Calm down and keep it in your pants, honey. It's just the internet.

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same applies for you ...