Hi everyone, this is my first post here…found this site when I was doing some reading about Libras last night. Seems like most people here are trying to figure out the people they are in relationships with. I am no different. I hope the Libras out there and the people who have insight into them can give me some advice. It is MUCH needed!
I have been seeing a Libra man for a few weeks. Not long at all. It was amazing in the beginning, and he was almost perfect. I was swept off my feet and felt like he could be “the oneâ€. We met on Tinder, and almost immediately we both deleted our accounts and said that we were going to be exclusive. I am not quick to open up about my feelings as I have been hurt so many times in the past. But Libra man was affectionate, sweet, and prodded me a bit to tell him how I felt. I am a Leo, and I am extremely passionate and when I do say how I feel, I am 100% open and honest. I told Libra man that I was “kinda in love†with him. To me, loving someone is different than being in love, and being in love is different than “kinda in loveâ€. And I meant it in a somewhat facetious way. I have feelings of the beginning stage of falling in love, but I am not in love with him. Libra man freaked out, saying he couldn’t believe I felt that after only seeing each other such a short time.
Long story short, things have been different between us since then. We are still talking, still seeing each other, but there has been a lot of game playing on both of our ends. After arguing nonstop and with things starting to sour, I told Libra man that I was going to take a step back and see other people. I had no intention of being into anyone except him, it was more about keeping myself busy and slowing things down between us after he pulled back. So I went on a date, and I was upfront and honest about it. Libra man then followed suit, going out with a woman he had met around the same time as me. He has been talking to this woman ever since then.
This past weekend, we didn’t see each other at all. He went out with her on Friday night, I went out with other men on Friday and Saturday. Libra man was not happy about that. On Sunday, I asked him to spend the day with me watching football. He declined my offer. Yesterday we got together to talk and decide if we want to try to work things out or go our separate ways. We decided that we want to give this another shot, but he did say that he is not ready to say he wants to be exclusive with me yet. I think seeing other people just adds additional complications between us that we don’t need, but I understood his feelings.
My issue now is that I found out he lied to me about seeing the other girl. When we were talking yesterday, he told me he was only with her on Friday, and was alone the rest of the weekend. I saw pictures of him at a party with her on Sunday, watching football. I was super hurt that he chose to hang out with her instead of me (but that could be because of m
Typical behavior. Move on.
Why the games if you both like each other?JSMH
Whoops....didn't realize it cut off the end of my post, here it is......
I was super hurt that he chose to hang out with her instead of me (but that could be because of my dates), and I am upset that he lied to me. I want this guy, and I do feel like I have contributed to the state of where we are- him not wanting to be exclusive. But the lie is eating away at me, and now doubt creeps into my head…am I now the backup girl, or is he simply reacting in turn to my behavior? My question is, how do I handle this?? Should I confront him? Should I let it go? And how do I proceed with him, to get things back on track? How do I get him to commit? I have been readily available, and continually let him know this is what I want. Should I back off and make him chase me a bit, or continue to try to show him this is what I want? Please help!
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Oct 08, 2009Comments: 1 · Posts: 6313 · Topics: 313
How do you get him to commit? Don't tell him you love him when you're weeks into the relationship, oh wait too late.......and to top it off, your take on taking it slow means seeing other people.....
Can you see how he's surprised that you say that you love him that he can't believe you said that so quick then you decide to see other people because you're insecure that he hasn't developed the same feelings as you.
I think you should bring up the lie to him and just break up with him, you're not gonna have a good relationship.
It doesn't matter. Why should she have to wait if he isn't serious about committing to her? He isn't doing it, makes him no better. OP, have you slept with him?
yep, I slept with him. And actually right now at this moment I'm getting some feedback from him that suggests I may now be the backup plan. I'm done with it.
Why would he tell me yesterday that he wants us to work things out then? I don't understand people who aren't straightforward.
You were the first one to tell him,, lets begin to see each other. I am sure he took it seriously. So it did it. I think you really like him but are exhausted with the arguments and bad stuff happening. This is so natural in relationships. No wonder it is always good to say at the begining stage that " you are getting feelings " rather than saying the "love", unless ofcourse the guy asks you "do you love me?"
You actually ended up getting hurt because you were the one at the first place to tell him we need to take a step back. So the guy now is doing what is needed. Seeing someone else and lying to you just so that you dont end up getting hurt. Its becomes complicated like any other relationship. You just need to relax now and think before you say anything to him. I am a libra. We libra's are light-hearted unlike earth signs.
In short you need to give him and yourself time. I would say, begin seeing others that way your mind will be diverted from him. But keep in touch with him.
you were the first one to tell him "lets begin to see others".............. *
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Mar 30, 2012Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
What'd you expect for meeting someone on Tinder?
So many silly bitches coming in here, stating they met a guy on Tinder, and then are amazed when things don't work out.
...????
Women seriously need to stop being so fucking delusional and making up shit in their heads. It's ridiculous. I had a friend who was just in town from out of country. Her main motivation for coming here was a guy she met online. She had built up so much about him in her head via the email contact they'd had (many of the messages had some romantic/sexual innuendo according to her), she ended up being disappointed that it didn't turn into the fling she'd been hoping for. He burst her bubble when he said he really didn't want to make this a thing and was fine with just being friends (and of course, this is after he got sex from her).
Meanwhile, I'd warned her not to move so fast and sleep with the guy because I know how she gets. Cue to me getting 22 text messages the next morning about her first night out with the guy and how disappointed she was in everything, including sleeping with him. Lo and behold, it also set the tone for the rest of her trip- he half assed plans with her and even just suggested coming over to "hang out" because he had work in the am (aka I want to fuck).
I seriously do not get why women do this to themselves. They flat out LIE and create this fantasy like life is a romantic comedy, but it's not. Maybe if you started living in reality more you'd have less issues when it comes to dating and how guys actually work.
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Mar 30, 2012Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Nvm, I see that you're also a Leo.
...'splains everything. *sigh* You women are such lost causes.
From a book titled "The Power of the Yssup" Last word spell it backwards otherwise system will translate it to butter.
I interviewed ten single men, ages 18-43, and asked a very specific question, “Why do guys act like they want a girl to give it up, but then treat her badly when she does?†Their answers were brutally honest. They simply said, “Men don’t love sluts.â€Read more at location 661
The woman they really want is the one who rejects them. They want to get the girl that’s a challenge and doesn’t give it up easily. The girl that makes him wait for it, work for it, and chase after it. The woman he falls in love with is the exact opposite of a slut, because men don’t fall in love with sluts.Read more at location 676
Men fall in love with ladies. Ladies who are mature enough to know they don’t have to have sex. Ladies who don’t even want to have sex quickly, because it’s an unladylike thing to do. The type of woman a man will love gives off a vibe that says loud and clear: “I’m not an easy girl and you’re going to have to put in some effort if you want a girl like me, because I’m very special.
Make them wait, make them work, make them pay, and then they will love you, appreciate you, and take good care of you.
If he is seeing someone else, and you already gave up the goods, it's a wrap.
The sleeping with a man right away topic goes both ways. If I have any interest in a man long term I won't sleep with him for a long time (waited 4 months with my last bf, but keep in mind I'm in my late thirties). But there are some guys that you may be physically attracted to, but don't see long term potential. Those guys I may chose to have fun with, not caring if we ever talk again or not.
Libra man was just a fun for the night guy in my mind. But then he kept coming back around and I got to know him more. He pursued me heavily, and swept me off my feet. I don't think us having sex early was the cause...I think it was more when I told him that we needed to take a step back and slow down. When I went on a date with someone else, that's where I took a big misstep with him, I believe. We're still talking, but I think both of us are moving on.