Just a vent

This topic was created in the Libra forum by sweethearts on Sunday, April 1, 2018 and has 19 replies.
End of Last year I went out with a guy 4 times, we slept together once and to my surprise he ghosted me. It took me a little while (about a month) to realize that was what was happening. I spent a bit of that time wondering why when we seemed to hit it off, very easy to talk to and lots to talk about. Anyway eventually just kept moving but still had me wondering. I realized and concluded that I had done it to guys before, where it just wasn’t there for me so I moved on *shrugs*



Then today out of the blue but kinda expected that at some point we would see each other again, we had met through mutual friends, he was at a birthday celebration. I went up, gave the birthday boy a kiss (my gf’s husband) and said hi also to this guy…but I was shaking and couldn’t think when he was asking how I was and he chatted as we had previously done with ease. I couldn’t wait to get away because I wasn’t in control of myself & felt stupid! I took the first opportunity to move away so I could feel more relaxed and in my own space.

Geez, Hoping it’s not going to be like this every time we happen to be at the same event together. I guess I felt that we really had something and I got attached and still trying to fully detach.

I’ve heard that for some when a woman sleeps with a man they may feel a bond or feel entitle to an explanation at least. Who knows if I did stick around and talk further it might have come out but in reality I don't think I want to know, the truth may hurt...

Posted by HearttofTopaz
Kissing my husband is a quick way to get a kick in the beehole and that doesn’t include the hoof removal

Sounds like u luv attention

Wtf are you paying for then??
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
Posted by HearttofTopaz
Posted by Whorpio
Posted by HearttofTopaz
Kissing my husband is a quick way to get a kick in the beehole and that doesn’t include the hoof removal

Sounds like u luv attention

Wtf are you paying for then??

It’s a limited time only coupon
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Well issa coupon for a free bday kiss so idk where you want it to go 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️
Yes you are entitled to an explanation if that’s what you need. Find him privately and ask him what happened because you need closure.

Don’t be afraid to get what you want even if it’s silly to someone else.
Posted by Toti
You sound like a libra Who has leo moon, hungry for attention. Move along and stop overthinking it. He got what he wanted. Nothing more to it. Or it hurt your ego that someone could resist your charms?


Bang on Leon Moon and yes I was hurt being jilted as most would be, he is a decent guy who has his own demons obviously. I don't met many that I think could be a potential partner so when I sleep with someone I've already thought it was going further.

I do get a lot of attention so I would say that I am "hungry for attention' from the right man, evidently he wasn't the one.
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


Posted by sweethearts
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


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I agree. I was just asking what you have learned specifically.

Posted by HearttofTopaz
Posted by Whorpio
Well issa coupon for a free bday kiss so idk where you want it to go 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

I haven’t decided yet. That’s the point
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Limited. Time. Only.

User Submitted Image
Posted by STILL
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


I agree. I was just asking what you have learned specifically.

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Specifically it reiterated that just because someone may tick a lot of your boxes doesn't mean you will tick theirs.

Guys very easily tap and gap with no second thoughts

It's a hard road finding that perfect someone...

most importantly, it's great to say that you will open your heart and mind to finding someone but you still have to guard your heart because trust takes time and I tend to trust too quickly

So have you figured out why all the hotness just being around him even though you have gotten over him ? I'm not sure what that is but I understand that vibes are there and of course they are ... yeah, you two might have been able to have something but it just didn't turn out that way. That for me doesn't mean that the feelings are gone completely. But now it's in your hands, your control - not his. For me that was an escalator I noticed with my last guy. It sort of, like, felt good when it was "my call" ...

Posted by sweethearts
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


click to expand
Fair enough. I just don't think it's ever wrong to want to ask questions. If you need to know something then you have the right to ask. It doesn't mean the other person will respond but i mean you always have the right to ask whatever you need to move on.

But glad to hear you worked it out on your own. smile

Posted by tctao
So have you figured out why all the hotness just being around him even though you have gotten over him ? I'm not sure what that is but I understand that vibes are there and of course they are ... yeah, you two might have been able to have something but it just didn't turn out that way. That for me doesn't mean that the feelings are gone completely. But now it's in your hands, your control - not his. For me that was an escalator I noticed with my last guy. It sort of, like, felt good when it was "my call" ...

I think it was because I had no control over the situation, he had rejected me. That hurts no matter how little time we spent together because in my mind it was going somewhere and valid and I thought it was reciprocated. When I walked away from him it was me taking back control. You don’t get to enjoy my company (and he did) because of how you treated me.

Don’t get me wrong even though his actions were dismissive he really is a nice guy. Before he left he came to give me a kiss and say goodbye.

It is what it is, just not meant to be.

He is Pisces too if that makes sense.

Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


Fair enough. I just don't think it's ever wrong to want to ask questions. If you need to know something then you have the right to ask. It doesn't mean the other person will respond but i mean you always have the right to ask whatever you need to move on.

But glad to hear you worked it out on your own. smile

click to expand
Totally understand and earlier on I would have wanted to know but now, I’ve let it go and dealt with it.

While I was working through the rejection I remember being on the other side a year before. I met this guy that we got on really well, sex was good but he lived an hour away and ended up just wanting to couch sit when I visited. I felt indifferent about us together and told him so and called it quits. He’s still a fb friend. Perhaps it was simple as that? No fireworks.

Posted by sweethearts
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by jeane
I don't think it's about feelings, it's about power, control and self esteem. This guy left you high and dry. You even said you feel "entitled" to an explanation.

I think there is no remedy for this other than time and perhaps a successful encounter with someone else where you are in control of the outcome.
I hear you Jeane, definite issues with power and control and I've worked hard on my self esteem so knocks won't ever take me down but do cause me to reassess and check myself.

@Still

It's all a learning curb no matter what age and makes you stronger or open to change

@stillstillwater

I think I'm good, don't really want an explanation anymore, it's been 3 months now and have worked through it on my own, was just thrown with the sudden meeting. I will just be polite and stay away should we be at the same events.


Fair enough. I just don't think it's ever wrong to want to ask questions. If you need to know something then you have the right to ask. It doesn't mean the other person will respond but i mean you always have the right to ask whatever you need to move on.

But glad to hear you worked it out on your own. smile

Totally understand and earlier on I would have wanted to know but now, I’ve let it go and dealt with it.

While I was working through the rejection I remember being on the other side a year before. I met this guy that we got on really well, sex was good but he lived an hour away and ended up just wanting to couch sit when I visited. I felt indifferent about us together and told him so and called it quits. He’s still a fb friend. Perhaps it was simple as that? No fireworks.

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well hun you'll never know now if you've decided to just close the chapter. There's truly only one way to find out.

It’s possible that I’ll find out, our mutual friend is very social and always organising get togethers so at some point we’ll see each other again.

It’s weird, she didn’t know we had a brief fling him and I and is trying to set me up with someone else, so I told her.

Not keen to hook up with the other guy!
I would have been feeling exactly that around the first month but not now. Plenty of time to analyse and realise we weren’t that compatible. I’m libra he’s Pisces and the communication and coldness would have tipped me over and tbh there would have been plenty of explosions from me from pure frustration! Reading the Pisces boards, definitely not my type. No patience, it all sounds too immature. So yes you hit the nail childish! He ticked a lot of boxes but communication is number 1 and not something I can overlook in a potential mate.
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by tctao
So have you figured out why all the hotness just being around him even though you have gotten over him ? I'm not sure what that is but I understand that vibes are there and of course they are ... yeah, you two might have been able to have something but it just didn't turn out that way. That for me doesn't mean that the feelings are gone completely. But now it's in your hands, your control - not his. For me that was an escalator I noticed with my last guy. It sort of, like, felt good when it was "my call" ...

I think it was because I had no control over the situation, he had rejected me. That hurts no matter how little time we spent together because in my mind it was going somewhere and valid and I thought it was reciprocated. When I walked away from him it was me taking back control. You don’t get to enjoy my company (and he did) because of how you treated me.

Don’t get me wrong even though his actions were dismissive he really is a nice guy. Before he left he came to give me a kiss and say goodbye.

It is what it is, just not meant to be.

He is Pisces too if that makes sense.

click to expand
yeah those pisces lol - well now you are free to find someone who wants to be with you
Posted by Toti
Posted by sweethearts
Posted by Toti
You sound like a libra Who has leo moon, hungry for attention. Move along and stop overthinking it. He got what he wanted. Nothing more to it. Or it hurt your ego that someone could resist your

Bang on Leon Moon and yes I was hurt being jilted as most would be, he is a decent guy who has his own demons obviously. I don't met many that I think could be a potential partner so when I sleep with someone I've already thought it was going further.

I do get a lot of attention so I would say that I am "hungry for attention' from the right man, evidently he wasn't the one.


Libra with leo moon is what I , unfortunately, experienced many times. Keep that ego under control if you ever want to keep a relationship. You are dealing with humans, not robots equipped to serve you. Most women wouldn't consider that situation as "being jilted", but you, because of the sense of entitlement, did.

Do some inner work before forming relationships. If you want them to last. Good luck.

Thanks, more detail on the Leo moon please. Because I honestly think a lot of woman would feel jilted. Especially after sex and another date.

I’ve seen my gf break down in tears when a date she had seen less than this didn’t show up to a ron de vue and failed to inform her.

At the time, if he’d said hey. It’s not working for me then I would have been fine but just to completely ignore me after our last meeting saying I’ll call you and then ignore the only text I sent after that...??

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