krazy libras!
This topic was created in the Libra forum by xoxo on Monday, November 5, 2007 and has 29 replies.
Hello all!! I found this site a few days ago and have found it to be extremely helpful! 
I have been dating a libra man myself since the beginning of July and I wanted to share my story and hopefully get some feedback/advice. I am an aquarius and find myself sometimes exhausted when it comes to trying to figure this guy out. Also, we both find that we are veryyyy much alike and both put "up a front" and expect the other to be the initiator in the relationship. This has created many issues....I think were both scared to show we care. But anyways, after dating my guy for 3 months, i realized i needed to see if it was going anywhere. I brought up the topic of commiting and basically my libra fled the scene, saying "I want to be with you but I CANT have a girlfriend right now". I was hurt and decided I needed to put an end to it. A month went by without seeing eachother but he would contact me through texts and emails and some late night phone calls. I ignored his calls and texts and only sometimes would e-mail back with a friendly, "hello, how have you been". He weaseled his way back in a few weeks ago. They have this way of showing up the moment you begin to forget about them, don't they?? Well, 2 days ago (after a friends b-day party and many drinks) my libra took the plunge and asked me if i wanted to be with him. I
replyed, "what if i say i do but you in turn say you dont want to be with me?" He replyed back that he did want to be with me and by the end of the conversation, I was his girlfriend. I asked him why he was willing now but a month ago he was not and he said that the timming wasn't right then but now it was because he had too much going on then with work and now he had enough time to invest in the relationship. The he dissapeared. He tells me he wants me to be his girlfriend then i don't hear a peep from him for 2 days. I saw him last night and he tells me he went to mexico.....very random and im not sure if i should believe him. What i want to know is if he will begin to show he cares for me and if once these libra men make there mind up about something they stick to it? Im wondering if maybe he's having second thoughts on the "boyfriend girlfriend" thing because his actions aren't fullfilling the title. Also, is it true that timing would have kept him from being with me before? Thanks all and sorry for the long post!
I have been dating a libra man myself since the beginning of July and I wanted to share my story and hopefully get some feedback/advice. I am an aquarius and find myself sometimes exhausted when it comes to trying to figure this guy out. Also, we both find that we are veryyyy much alike and both put "up a front" and expect the other to be the initiator in the relationship. This has created many issues....I think were both scared to show we care. But anyways, after dating my guy for 3 months, i realized i needed to see if it was going anywhere. I brought up the topic of commiting and basically my libra fled the scene, saying "I want to be with you but I CANT have a girlfriend right now". I was hurt and decided I needed to put an end to it. A month went by without seeing eachother but he would contact me through texts and emails and some late night phone calls. I ignored his calls and texts and only sometimes would e-mail back with a friendly, "hello, how have you been". He weaseled his way back in a few weeks ago. They have this way of showing up the moment you begin to forget about them, don't they?? Well, 2 days ago (after a friends b-day party and many drinks) my libra took the plunge and asked me if i wanted to be with him. I replyed, "what if i say i do but you in turn say you dont want to be with me?" He replyed back that he did want to be with me and by the end of the conversation, I was his girlfriend. I asked him why he was willing now but a month ago he was not and he said that the timming wasn't right then but now it was because he had too much going on then with work and now he had enough time to invest in the relationship. The he dissapeared. He tells me he wants me to be his girlfriend then i don't hear a peep from him for 2 days. I saw him last night and he tells me he went to mexico.....very random and im not sure if i should believe him. What i want to know is if he will begin to show he cares for me and if once these libra men make there mind up about something they stick to it? Im wondering if maybe he's having second thoughts on the "boyfriend girlfriend" thing because his actions aren't fullfilling the title. Also, is it true that timing would have kept him from being with me before? Thanks all and sorry for the long post!
When they are 100% sure they want you. There will be no question and definitely no going to Mexico without your knowledge... It sounds like he likes you but still has some reservation about being in a serious relationship. IMO.
so how should i play my cards? Do you think it's best I back off for a while and give him some space? I feel dumb for believeing were together...........if were not. blah.
I think you should always be true to yourself. Tell him how you feel and ask what's up. Without the emotional mumbo jumbo. Stay clear, stop setting yourself up to guess with these guys.
"They have this way of showing up the moment you begin to forget about them, don't they??"
God yeah!!!! Every freaking time!!!
xoxo enjoy your life, do what you like to do and let him chase YOU!!
God yeah!!!! Every freaking time!!!
xoxo enjoy your life, do what you like to do and let him chase YOU!!
Coz they know how to!!
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
what does it take 4 them to 100% like you? you not caring anymore?.....Its all a game isint it? It seems when I show I care then he will mimic my behavior though.
If they are sure, there are no games.
yup like QS said....its really not worth "playing the game" anyway....love should not be that hard....take it from somebody who tried for a year LOL
NO games. The conversations might be difficult at first. But buckle in because if he wants to be with you, then you're in for a wonderful ride!
They won't play games, but I've learned they throw "tests" out there. They have an intent and purpose for their tests, and after the fact, they will tell you why they did what they did. They don't see it as a game, neither do I. My boyfriend still tests me and so far, I've passed all of them!
They won't play games, but I've learned they throw "tests" out there. They have an intent and purpose for their tests, and after the fact, they will tell you why they did what they did. They don't see it as a game, neither do I. My boyfriend still tests me and so far, I've passed all of them!
update: so i texted him saying im confused about us. And basically he tells me that when he has a girlfriend he wants to give her his all and he feels he cant do that right now because he is too busy. Sounds like a cop out to me. I guess I'm just not his "ideal" girl that he is 100% sure about. 
im upset. And i basically told him that ive given him too many chances and im letting go. All we will ever be is friends from now on. He said "I'm sorry" and i said, "its fine. its your loss not mine" I sooo want to be done with it. I hate how they always come back and i hate how i always let him back in expecting a different result. The only result ive ever gotten is heartache and embaressment for believing his lies. So what do you all think? Will he be back? Realize what he lost? Or has he just been keeping me around for shits and giggles.....a girl to have when its convienient..... while hes looking for his "ideal"
im upset. And i basically told him that ive given him too many chances and im letting go. All we will ever be is friends from now on. He said "I'm sorry" and i said, "its fine. its your loss not mine" I sooo want to be done with it. I hate how they always come back and i hate how i always let him back in expecting a different result. The only result ive ever gotten is heartache and embaressment for believing his lies. So what do you all think? Will he be back? Realize what he lost? Or has he just been keeping me around for shits and giggles.....a girl to have when its convienient..... while hes looking for his "ideal"*meant to say shits and giggles....no idea where butter came from!
omg! i mean: "shits!!" shits and giggles! lol
Its hard to tell but again, I went through very similar with one for a year...He'll probably be back in time....who knows, maybe both of you will be single and ready....for now though, as you both have established he just isn't ready....he can't help that and he is being honest with you at least.
In time be friends and in the future who knows.
"They won't play games, but I've learned they throw "tests" out there. They have an intent and purpose for their tests, and after the fact, they will tell you why they did what they did"
OMG yes I have noticed this with the new Libra I am seeing (yes I am still kicking myself for getting involved with another LOL)....but yes, there are tests - strange creatures!!!
In time be friends and in the future who knows.
"They won't play games, but I've learned they throw "tests" out there. They have an intent and purpose for their tests, and after the fact, they will tell you why they did what they did"
OMG yes I have noticed this with the new Libra I am seeing (yes I am still kicking myself for getting involved with another LOL)....but yes, there are tests - strange creatures!!!
ahh, i finally get it....the site wont let me say the S word, they put butters in for it! haha
they are very strange, very strange indeed...but somehow sooo intrigueing! ugh, its horrible. So say we start off as friends again months from now.....how am i to know he won't pull the stunt again? I find it so disheartening that someone can be so mean to tell you they want to be with you then in a matter of days change their mind. I personally believe it has nothing to do with not being ready. It's just a cop out because he realized he doesnt want to be with ME. whats even more strange is, i got a text from my X (virgo) saying that his girlfriend broke up with him @ basically the same time i was dumped. weird. maybe theres something in the air!....or stars!
they are very strange, very strange indeed...but somehow sooo intrigueing! ugh, its horrible. So say we start off as friends again months from now.....how am i to know he won't pull the stunt again? I find it so disheartening that someone can be so mean to tell you they want to be with you then in a matter of days change their mind. I personally believe it has nothing to do with not being ready. It's just a cop out because he realized he doesnt want to be with ME. whats even more strange is, i got a text from my X (virgo) saying that his girlfriend broke up with him @ basically the same time i was dumped. weird. maybe theres something in the air!....or stars!
sometime back when i was watching US Vs John Lennon, I came across this dialog from lennon abt Yoko. "We both knew it was something big... so we avoided each other for a year..." (not exact words but this is what it means)... I guess its same with all aqua-libra cases.
thats nice to think. but im tired of living in my dream world where it will work out in the end. I feel that if it was supposed to happen it would have by now.....too bad hes the ONLY guy ive ever stressed over. Tons of guys have fallen for me....but hes the only one ive fallen for.....the one who cant seem to fall for me.
not to mention my friends and family are sick of hearing about it and they think im krazy to let it have gone this long. Being an aquarius i can usually walk away from someone or something and not look back. For some reason he has power over me and he knows it and he uses it to his advantage. I just wish i knew if there was any truth to the many sweet things he said or if it was allll a lie.
xoxo enjoy the other men....if its meant to be you will find out at a later date
Been there, done it, and going then did it again.LOL I WAS torturing myself over the same exact dilemma and couldn't understand WHY he does this "testing" or "dangling a carrot" thingy. Or says things but doesn't really mean them. (or does he?) If I knew the reason why, I could except it no matter what it is but I had to understand it first in order to let go and put it away. I have a very analytical mind for everything. I MUST know how something works otherwise I will keep turning it over and over until I find the key to understanding it. I may not agree with it or like it but....my mind needs to know the knowledge to satisfy the question in order to file the information away and put it to rest.
I empathize with your situation because it is a cruel game that he is playing with your feelings and he doesn't (I assure you) think of it that way. But ultimately it is YOU that holds the power over YOU and your own emotions and you have to get it back.
If you choose to live on false hope you're in for a very long wait and probably a broken heart. If you walk away sooner, you still end up with a broken heart.
If you want to know where your situation is going I recommend reading Chatz's posts for the last year!! It's a good indication and a gage and you'll probably see yourself and your similar situation throughout the posts.
A big ((HUG))and plenty more if you need them.
I empathize with your situation because it is a cruel game that he is playing with your feelings and he doesn't (I assure you) think of it that way. But ultimately it is YOU that holds the power over YOU and your own emotions and you have to get it back.
If you choose to live on false hope you're in for a very long wait and probably a broken heart. If you walk away sooner, you still end up with a broken heart.
If you want to know where your situation is going I recommend reading Chatz's posts for the last year!! It's a good indication and a gage and you'll probably see yourself and your similar situation throughout the posts.
A big ((HUG))and plenty more if you need them.
***And basically he tells me that when he has a girlfriend he wants to give her his all and he feels he cant do that right now because he is too busy. Sounds like a cop out to me. I guess I'm just not his "ideal" girl ***
Not a cop out, it is him being honest. Librans care deeply and when they are honest about their feelings, because they have a candied way of dealing with things we (females) don't take them for what they say... He isn't saying you aren't is ideal girl, he is just saying he isn't able to give you all you deserve in a relationship right now. He is being honest not playing games. You should appreciate that he respects you enough to be honest. He could have lied and lead you on. He didn't. This shows he does care.
Not a cop out, it is him being honest. Librans care deeply and when they are honest about their feelings, because they have a candied way of dealing with things we (females) don't take them for what they say... He isn't saying you aren't is ideal girl, he is just saying he isn't able to give you all you deserve in a relationship right now. He is being honest not playing games. You should appreciate that he respects you enough to be honest. He could have lied and lead you on. He didn't. This shows he does care.
***I hate how they always come back and i hate how i always let him back in expecting a different result. The only result ive ever gotten is heartache and embaressment for believing his lies. So what do you all think? Will he be back? Realize what he lost? Or has he just been keeping me around for butters and giggles.....a girl to have when its convienient..... while hes looking for his "ideal"***
He comes back because he cares for you. He just can't or choses not to love you in the way YOU want him too. Librans love on so many levels. This guy could love you as a dear person to him, however that doesn't mean he is "in love" with you. Librans can love and care for a person without being "in love" with them, unlike most other signs. Trust me. I have a libran friend who loves and cares for me and tells me all the time, but neither of us are "in love" with eachother.
He comes back because he cares for you. He just can't or choses not to love you in the way YOU want him too. Librans love on so many levels. This guy could love you as a dear person to him, however that doesn't mean he is "in love" with you. Librans can love and care for a person without being "in love" with them, unlike most other signs. Trust me. I have a libran friend who loves and cares for me and tells me all the time, but neither of us are "in love" with eachother.
Be happy to have him as a friend. Librans make the best friends. They are sincere and loyal to their friends. Take the emotion out and you can deal with it. As long as the emotion is there because it didn't turn out as you expected it... there will be resentment.
***It's just a cop out because he realized he doesnt want to be with ME. whats even more strange is, i got a text from my X (virgo) saying that his girlfriend broke up with him @ basically the same time i was dumped. weird. maybe theres something in the air!....or stars
***
Not a cop out... It isn't about you it is about him Remember that.
***Not a cop out... It isn't about you it is about him Remember that.
I took the emotion out a month ago when this happened. All i would allow is my friendship....he asked to come over and we talked for about 3 hours and when he left to leave, he kissed me. it was natural....i didnt even think about it tell after he left. And then i realized that he took it from friendship to more in a matter of seconds and all the work and effort i had put in to "Getting over it" was thrown out the window. I know im not innocent in this though, i allowed him to kiss me, i could have pulled away. I'm just saying, if he wants to love me as a friend, thats fine and i can handle that. But i know deep down inside that we CANT do the friendship thing.....it always goes to more.
Yup *sigh*
what are the tests? do i need a pencil? no seriously...if u can stay after they say "i like you as a friend, i can't live w/o u" ?
Big question, gem. I sure don't have the answer for it (as I seem to be in the middle of it!).
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