Libra guy and pisces girl.Too complex.Input guys?

This topic was created in the Libra forum by gia on Friday, May 3, 2013 and has 19 replies.
I am a college freshmen and I have feelings for this guy(Ryan).We love spending time together and have been good friends from the start.He was my date for the ball and he made me overly special on my birthday.We have hugged,held hands,late night dinners and been close.He never had a gf before.
Now one of my classmates asked me out on a date.I told this to Ryan.He asked me what I would tell him,so I said,??I'll tell him the truth that I have feelings for someone else.??
Booom!He got all weird.He behaved like he didn't care who I liked but he left me alone in the library that midnight.Things ???sort?? of got ok few days later but it wasn't like before.One of my guy friends even texted him a month ago saying that he thinks that I like him.He did not respond to that but he was nice to me on a dorm party held the next day.
After distancing himself from me for weeks,one fine day he told me,"Gia,I wanted more space.I just don't wanna be talking to one person.I wanna have more friends and know more people.I know we hardly hangout together but I feel like I see you almost everywhere I go.We can be very good friends but I don't want you to wait for me after classes.I just want to focus on academics.Please don't take it to your heart.You alright?" It pricked me but I smiled and said yeah and I left.After that,he would look at me and smile with a guilty look but I would sort of ignore him because he basically called me a STALKER.
We had our final exam these past 3 days and we didn't see each other last week.Discussing the exam and then getting dinner was always our thing.So he came to me after math exam but I tried not to pay him much attention.Then he asked me if I wanted to get dinner.I agreed but I asked one of out mutual guy friends to join.HE GOT SO PISSED.He did not look at me during dinner.However,he came to me the next day after physics exam but I pretended like he wasn't there.It was our last freshmen exam and he planned to eat with me but I ignored him and left.I later realized I was too harsh so I texted him,"how did physics go?" He didn't respond.He was online on fb so I msgd him on chat,"Ryan!I texted you.Why are you pissed with me?I'm the one suppose to be pissed.Not you." He sat on fb but he didn't even read it.I feel terrible that we ended our freshmen year so awfully.We'll be away for 3months summer break and we just share 2 classes next sem.I feel too low right now.
Any suggestions on how I could make things right again?Really apologize f
details
Posted by gia

We had our final exam these past 3 days and we didn't see each other last week.Discussing the exam and then getting dinner was always our thing.So he came to me after math exam but I tried not to pay him much attention.Then he asked me if I wanted to get dinner.I agreed but I asked one of out mutual guy friends to join.HE GOT SO PISSED.He did not look at me during dinner.However,he came to me the next day after physics exam but I pretended like he wasn't there.It was our last freshmen exam and he planned to eat with me but I ignored him and left. f


Just in case if you are thinking that I was too rude,I did that on purpose because I was really hurt by his "avoiding me" behavior and by all that he said.He wanted space so I thought I would give him what he asked for. I just wanted him to realize that his behavior was hurtful. Almost all our classmates think that we're dating. My friends feel that he's just not in touch with his feelings and he's hell confused. He's always too confused and lost about stuffs and he's extremely indecisive. Also,I wanted him to see that we are more than just friends. Hence,I felt treating him as just I would treat some random guy would be a good idea and would help him realize but it just backfired me I guess. It's moreover become like 'You throw attitude on me,fine..I'll do the same.' I am honestly tired with these mind games. I just wish I could talk to him in person and clear the air but he is just not responding to my texts. I think he;s leaving this sunday so I only have tomorrow. I don't know if I should do something before he leaves or wait for 3months and then talk to him once college starts.
details
And,I really apologize for the length. smile I thought I should write as much because I thought details would help you guys understand the situation better.
details
Thank you two for your response. I really appreciate it. I am just so lost now. You are right. Initiating any further talk from my side right now would worsen the case. Hence, I won't say anything unless he walks up to me. I really feel bad that I ignored him on purpose when he stood right in front of my face wanting to talk to me and then get dinner. And who knows,maybe we would have cleared the air.My friends told me that my fb message was a terrible idea so I'm feeling silly about that too. But too bad. Nothing can be done.
I just don't understand one thing above all. Is he being pissed and distant because he likes me and thinks that I like someone else? or is it because he doesn't like me and he knows I like him? OR because he's a confused indecisive being so he's confused about what he feels about me and he's just trying to run away from the fact?
I know it might be tough to tell
details
ohh..now thank you three Tongue smile
details
Calling you a stalker after he clearly was reciprocating and initiating interaction with you so much so people thought you both were a couple is harsh so stop apologizing for being harsh with him, he got back what he gave out to you.
I'm not sure why you would turn down a date over a guy that clearly has not affirmed his intentions for you which means you are free but it's the way you did it that may have affected the outcome.
You didn't just go out with another guy and not make apologies for it, instead you told Ryan about a potential date which led you confirming your feelings, DO NOT DO THAT unless you are willing and prepared to deal with a bad outcome, you freaked him out. Why didn't you wait to see how things unfold naturally between the both instead of forcing it by declaring some other guy is honing in on you for a date?
I see a slight level of head game on your part. If someone ask you out you don't need to tell Ryan, go out or not go out but Ryan shouldn't be a priority in your decision. You prioritizing him freaked him out.

I'm not sure why he'd call you a stalker but don't initiate contact with him again. Enjoy your 3 month break. If you contact Ryan and he does not respond back and you continue to initiate contact and does not respond, well yes, that is stalker type behavior.
details
<"`.
details
Posted by ninjutsu
At this current juncture, if I were him, I'd be pissed that you completely ignored me when I stood in front of you wanting to talk/get dinner. That would really hurt and humiliate *me* and it's not hard to imagine that it generated some negative feelings on his end.
I wouldn't read more than that into it at this point. That action alone was very hurtful. Not trying to make you feel bad about it either, as I know you realise your mistake now and it's good that you've learned from it.


I agree Sad which is something I REALLY regret. I just lost my calm when he said he wanted space just because he thought I was STALKING him. So I thought Fine! I'll give you space and let you know that I have no intention of stalking you. But you're right. That is exactly what got him mad. Besides,there were other people around too. So that added to the humiliation.
details
Posted by tiki33


I'm not sure why he'd call you a stalker but don't initiate contact with him again. Enjoy your 3 month break. If you contact Ryan and he does not respond back and you continue to initiate contact and does not respond, well yes, that is stalker type behavior.


He called me a stalker because we have 2 of our classes ending at the same time even though we are in different rooms. So we always cross each others path. Also, I have tons of friends who are from his class.So I bump into my friends and we get talking.Therefore,he thinks that I've been waiting for him the whole time. Also, he was totally depressed over a monetory issue for a week. So,I thought as a friend I should be there for him and cheer him up. So,I told him that I waited for for 20min after class,twice. But again,he took it the wrong way. Now it's weird because he and I used to hangout a lot more before and bump into each other more often. He never brought out this thought before. It all started after I told him about my classmate asking me out talk.
details
Posted by ninjutsu
Posted by gia
Posted by ninjutsu
humiliation.


Oh yeah, I can see how that part would really seal it for a leeb.
In one of your subsequent texts messages to him did you apologise for doing that?


I just texted him yesterday once asking how did his exam go.And then i lost my mind and got ran over by emotions so I msgd him on fb chat. That's all.He didn't reply to any of that. I chose to not mention about ignoring him because he has just tooo much ego than what I thought. I know he would behave like he doesn't care if I ignore him or not. He would say something like,"Ohh I'm not pissed,Gia." and then behave like he doesn't care. I wanted to tell him why I ignored him. I just did not want to say it outright hence I started the conversation by first asking him about his exam. But too bad. He shut me down in the first text itself.
click to expand
details
Posted by ninjutsu
It's just a bummer that you have such a small window of time to get things sorted... Is there no way you will be able to contact him for the three month duration?


Fb chat only. And, not unless he talks to me of his own. I don't want to appear clingy or desperate but I wonder when would that day arrive when he would make the first move!!!! I don't know how long it would take him to cool down. He's usually a calm chilled out person. And something to note..He is VERY different when we are together in person and he's totally different when we just talk on texts/chat. He forgets everyone around us when we meet and we keep talking. Sometimes he even forgets that he has a class starting in few minutes or he has some work to do but he'll keep talking and take the longest route while we walk to a certain place. But he takes a while to respond on texts(and even worse on fb chat).For the past one month, he has been either replying me hours later or not replying me at all. Just that one statement changed everything so drastically. It's so sad and funny at the same time.
details
Posted by tiziani
It's not worth asking yourself those types of questions because you don't want to know all the things that go through our head (trust me). I don't advise trying to get inside a Libra's head as we do not like being inside our own head half the time. It leads to inaction and indecisiveness as you say. Life's too short for that.
Worst question you can ask a Libra = "What are you thinking?" You'll wish you never asked Tongue
If he ever wants to do something about how he feels, he will do so. But you can't make him. You both made a few mistakes with miscommunication. That's ok. It's in the past. Let it go and live now. 3 months of summer sounds like fun to me.


I agree. He just tries to run away from anything which results in a conflict. And hell yeah!! He's the most indecisive and confused person I've met. Not only me but his own friends say that. 3 months of summer..Ahh yeah. I'm doing summer school and an internship starting few weeks from now. Fun stuff!! smile
details
Posted by tiziani
Oh dear. I didn't see the part where he was humiliated in front of his friends. Look, sorry to say, but if you step on male ego there really little chance of coming back from that. Nothing to do with being a Libra. Humiliate us in front of our friends and there's really no reason for us to want to make any further moves towards that. If you ever do get in touch with him then only do it the one time, and know what you really want to say if you do.
I'd go away for 3 months and live your life. Stepping on his pride in person and then apologizing via facebook is just not something that is going to cut it. It actually makes it worse since he will lose respect. I don't mean to ramp up your anxiety. I'm just saying if you seriously want to build bridges then at least give it time away from him to know why. I'd take it as a good sign that he was pissed. When a Libra is done they will just be cold and ice you out.


Actually they were my girl friends and not his friends.My friends were discussing the paper with me and he saw me standing with them while he was walking down the stairs. He came to me and stood in front of me. I just behaved like he wasn't there and I continued talking to my friends without saying him a hey or anything. Then he joined a group of guys(who are my friends too). I realized that I was a bit too mean with the ignoring so I went over to the guy group and asked what question he was discussing about. He did not respond. Then I told everyone that I was leaving since I was too hungry. He ran outside to see if I was till there and when he realized I was still there with different people, he caught up with new set of people and started talking to them. Then I finally gave up and I left for lunch without telling him anything and therefore, he turned his back and walked off the opposite direction.
It's funny that he tells me we're just friends but he ends up behaving just the other way round.
details
Posted by ninjutsu
Posted by gia
Posted by ninjutsu
It's just a bummer that you have such a small window of time to get things sorted... Is there no way you will be able to contact him for the three month duration?


Fb chat only. And, not unless he talks to me of his own. I don't want to appear clingy or desperate but I wonder when would that day arrive when he would make the first move!!!! I don't know how long it would take him to cool down. He's usually a calm chilled out person. And something to note..He is VERY different when we are together in person and he's totally different when we just talk on texts/chat. He forgets everyone around us when we meet and we keep talking. Sometimes he even forgets that he has a class starting in few minutes or he has some work to do but he'll keep talking and take the longest route while we walk to a certain place. But he takes a while to respond on texts(and even worse on fb chat).For the past one month, he has been either replying me hours later or not replying me at all. Just that one statement changed everything so drastically. It's so sad and funny at the same time.


Wise. You've already initiated enough at this point, I think it's good to give him space to get back to you. And if he doesn't? Concentrate on your internship and having fun over the break smile
click to expand


yup.I guess patience and fate is the only key for me now
details
So I just met him today noon in the dining court. I was sitting alone since all my friends left for summer break. Ryan walked in and he saw me and gave a compressed smile and he was about to walk over to me BUT he instead walked off the other way. Then I thought I should go,show him a friendly gesture and talk to him. So I saw him getting juice so i went to the juice counter. He left as soon as he saw me coming. I felt so angry.I just walked off.
One of our mutual friends joined me for lunch since he saw me sitting alone. Then he asked me what's going on between me and Ryan as he never saw us like this before. Then I sort of told him everything and he said that Ryan is one of the most lost confused guys he's ever met.Also,he told me that he's not reliable because he can't trust his own decisions(which in a way is true to an extent).
It's all so weird. All I wish is to have an open honest talk. I know I must have mentioned this several times on the thread before but I'm just so blanked out right now.Gaah~
details
Ohh and ANOTHER mini update.Thankfully a little positive one. I was eating with a friend and he came there to get his pasta. He saw me and this time he gave me a hugee happy smile. Then he came to me of his own(which sort of surprised me) and asked me about my summer plans and asked if I was doing May course(something which he and I had decided to do together). I told him that I was and asked him about his plans and as USUAL he said he was undecided and uncertain. Then he said "Have a good summer Gia.Take care." and he left.
That was it.
details
Posted by LeeeebraJS
Stalker: someone who hacks other people's phone, high jack their internet activity, show up under varies genders, user names, signs, accents, personalities to where the stalked person's active place, fabricate all kinds of stories...is a Stalker. by anyone's standard.
There are the moments when you look at these act of craziness, and ask oneself... do I know this person, what is this, what was I thinking? and you lose the very last shred of respect. All these madness and mind manipulation...people fail, it is ok to fail, show me a human being who no longer fails, I will show you a corpse. I am not in love with you, I have no feelings for you for a very very long time, there is no way in hell there is a going back. Just move on.
I do not send mixed signals, the fucked up part is not what song I listen to, what movie I watch, what picture I downloaded, the fucked up part is watching all these average daily activities of a normal human being and thinking it has anything to do with you. The reality is if you would stop stalking me, you will know I have not act to talked to you, contacted you for almost three years, it is moved on by anyone's standard. You are assuming I am as obsessed as you and actually base my every act on communicating with someone who stalks me, you need to learn you subjectivity of your own subjective world is an illusion and to project that illusion onto me will not help you in any way. You are assuming that I chose to deal with my life with integrity as a sign that I'm not over my past, you are very wrong, I am not a slave of emptiness, I do not need emotional involvement in the romantic capacity at all times with somebody to feel fulfillment. There is a time for everything. You are assuming I'm looking at YOU, I am not, I have a heightened intuition that tells me so much about almost everyone I cross path with and in my line of vision, which you put yourself there, you are giving me nightmares that a person is obsessed with me and who is beyond reason and boundary, a lot of bad things happen with that combination. When people are stalked on the street they look back because they don't feel safe, they want to see what's coming, reading your post is not talking to you. There is no signs when there is no presence. wake up, where on earth had you lost your dignity to?_?you are a human being not worse or better than me, live that life.
I
details
I`m confused LOL...Are you Ryan hahahah
details
I'm Libra and I was once SO deeply in love with a Pisces lady in 2012. All she did was 'test' me again and again, and in the end she said she don't feel secured at all to be with me. I had enough of 'tests' and gave up. I gave all I can, showered all my loves to her but she still doubt with my sincerely. My last word to her is, 'enough is enough'. Winking
details

Leave Your Feedback

We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.

Home Astrology Comments Forums Search

©1997-2025 dxpnet.com. All Rights Reserved.
Advertising Contact Terms of Use Privacy Policy