Libra in love with a Taurus man

This topic was created in the Libra forum by Paula on Wednesday, March 13, 2002 and has 24 replies.
Have any other Libran's had a love match with a Taurus recently? This past year was filled with romance and intensity then to total confusion. I have never experienced this jekyl and hyde characteristic in a Taurus person before. I was curious to know if the fact that we have the same planet Venus could be related to some of the stop and go attitudes of this past year. We still cannot seem to break the attraction but try to limit it to friendship. He needs a lot of space and I need a partner so this is going no where. But, if I begin to date someone he drops the sweetheart of the month and comes running back as fast as he can. I find myself with confused feelings for the new person and cannot go forward with them. As soon as I stop seeing them, he moves another girl in with him. It would seem my heart would just let go..there is not a possibility in the world this guy is going to change, but tell that to my heart, it just will not listen.
I'm opting for the friendship. Hopefully this will break the cycle.
Any helpful comments out there. Is this kind of thing just a game that the heart can't get out of?
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I haven't got a clue!!!
I'm dating a taurean male myself right now, and I am just about as confused as you are. You are right about the attraction... it is unquenchable,
but the drama and jekyl and hyde complex is just too unbearable at the same time. Ever get te feeling that when you two are good- you an awesome couple, but when you're at odds with each other... ouch!!!
I wish I could help you more...
I do not have many answers, but I do understand what you're going through.
PS. Do you understand why Taureans when hate Librans analyse everything? I don't understand why this even affects them... because this process is mostly internal!!!
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Wow! Didn't realise those Taureans were known to have two faces - but they do! I'm so attracted to her but she's hot one day and cold the next. Very strange. But the attraction is partly based on her mystery and it just gets stronger...
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I was in love with a Taurus man for 5 years, before I finally moved on. This man would call me and tell me about his loves, but the minute I would become interested in someone, he'd drop them and come on strongly to me. This went on, until I finally told him he'd have to make a decision. I think he liked the game, but I didn't like it. Today, we're only friends. This past Valentine's Day, he sent me a greeting card via email. I didn't respond, because I'm over him. It's funny. The less you want them, the more they want you. I have a half-sister who is identical to this description. She loves men all the more when they don't want her. When she has someone who's crazy for her, she gets bored and uses them. Isn't that funny. My sister is in love with a Taurus and she's a Virgo. They play the same kind of game. When she doesn't call him, he's crazy about her. When she responds to him, he takes her for granted. Oh well, I guess it's all in the emotions.
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Thank you for all the above. It's true about the Taurus being agitated with our analyzing but the relationship calls for a good deal of it as the communication is so sparce.
Perhaps that is why the charts say we are incompatible. If the physical part of the relationship was as complicated as the communication I am sure this would never have gone this far, but opposites do attract!
Good luck to the rest of you in a Lib/Taurus relationship.
This one is going to back out, gracefully.
Paula
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here here!
I am also trying desparately to breathe...
alone and without the help of my taurus gent. This has been one crazy rollercoaster ride right from the begginning.
Half of the time, I didn't feel like he was doing enough to satisfy my needs.
Instead he focused all energy on himself.
I can't stand it!!! I am a libra, and quite the opposite.
I do not understand how anyone could be so self absorbed.
Getting out- anyway that I can!
Good luck librans- you're all so special.
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my taurus fella has so many interests, hobbies and his work that after the initial few months of love and romance he suddenly screamed "space". when i gave him space there was immediately another woman to take "my vacated space" other than friendship this libra woman definitely wants someone to be with who wants to spend some of their time and energy on her.
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I too am a Libra and a couple of years ago I had a 3 year relationship with a Taurus man. It was an intense relationship and I loved him deeply but had to walk away due to the fact that this man loved money more than he loved me. It seemed as if he put that above all else and I could not take it anymore. Now, we are the best of friends and can talk about anything including other relationships in our lives. Through, I have not had a relationship with anyone for 3 years, I can talk to my Taurus friend and get advise on anything. I think your relationship can work but a Taurus always wants to be right about eveything and they prefer that the Libra in their life has no opinion on anything....
If compromise can happen, it has wonderful possabilities
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I did a compatability check on my taurus love and i. The first part was wonderful, the heaven part of the relationship, but the last two paragraphs made it sound as though it was imprisonment with commitment for both sides. best to just enjoy then walk away by the sounds of it.
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I am a Libra and I have dated Taurean men who have been wonderful. Paula, the fact that he keeps pulling away has nothing to do with his zodiac sign and everything to do with his fear of intimacy/commitment. To add to the complexity, it sounds like he, like every other human being, likes to be in control of his environment. Every time you leave him, he fears the power that you have taken back from him (i.e. his own loss of power). He is afraid of losing you (neediness), and yet he is so scared to make any kind of commitment. This is a form of emotional unavailabilty. This friendship thing will only make matters worse for you, because while it will keep him happy (because he has you right where he wants you - at arms length), you will always want more. Since relationships are 50/50, you deserve someone who can give to you what you give to him. Seek the help of a therapist to try to figure out why you keep hanging on to someone who clearly cannot get close. You may have a fear of intimacy as well (by chosing emotionally unavailable men).
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Whom ever wrote this post is 100% dead on correct, but listen, you're not stupid are you; and you can learn can't you?? We'll then make the effort because it is well worth it and don't chicken out with excuses! I know you can do it so let's!?
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Your definitely right. I am seeing another fella, now. We have been aqaintances for some time.
I finally gave it a try. He's a great guy, but is at sea 2 months out of 4. Emotional availability, hmm. You make a lot of sense. I know for a fact it is not just him that is afraid to make a commitment.
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Paula wrote"We still cannot seem to break the attraction but try to limit it to friendship. He needs a lot of space and I need a partner so this is going no where. But, if I begin to date someone he drops the sweetheart of the month and comes running back as fast as he can. I find myself with confused feelings for the new person and cannot go forward with them. As soon as I stop seeing them, he moves another girl in with him"

It AMAZES me how someone can experience the same exact things with people of the same sign. This describes my relationship with a Taurus man to a T. It would have gone on forever if I kept him in my life and I would be alone. I would continue to hang on to him while he'd be doing whatever he wanted and whenever I would try to move on he'd draw to me like a magnet. I was actually in a rape situation with him because I was starting to see someone else again and I was going to break all contact with him completely because of his going back and forth. He got me to see him one day as "just friends, I promise" and I was drinking and he forced himself on me, but the thing about it is, a part of me wanted him but I was saying no. He didn't want to be with me but he was doing this and it almost drove me crazy. It was one of those things where I didn't realize what had happened until afterwords. I was in denial like, "I love him, I must have wanted him" but I remember that I saying no and was pushing him so he should have stopped. They can drive you crazy with that, "I want you, I don't want you. You have someone else, now I want you again" I had to cut him out of my life for my sanity. I hope to God I'll never fall in love with another one.
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I'm sorry that this happened to you hon. You are not responsible for any of his actions toward you. Please take care, and please try to enjoy your life. This guy seems awful from the sounds of what you said. I understand you terribly well. "He loves me.. he loves me not," sure does fit well here doesn't? I was trapped in a relationship with a guy similar to the one you spoke about. My heart felt so sore that it tore me up from the inside. I loved him so very much, and I always felt that he was sincere about the things that he said to me. I needed to escape the emotional instability, but I could never quite get away.. no matter how I tried.. so I stayed.
I will never be quite the same. He has taught me how to really feel deeply, and I have no regrets about being with him, but I longed for escape, so I figured out a way to get my own apartment, and I got away from him. He still communicates with me, but the distance really helps me out so much with him. I don't really know why it is not in the cards for us to work, but I, like all of us need to know when is when in our individual cases.
Stay safe honey, I love you.
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My 16 year relationship, 12 years of marriage just ended with my Taurus high school sweetheart. It seems as long as you give them everything they want, they seem content, but after awhile I became very upset by the lack of understanding and full commitment(soul-mate marriage) is something they will never get. We have two children together, who very much hate their dad for just "moving on" with his new affair with a new Libra. She found out very fast that he is not all he was cracked up to be, and after just a year, it has been the worst relationship of her life. Little did she realize all those years I put up with serious issues of self-absorption, money woes (due to him having to have everything for himself), and crying myself to sleep trying to "fix it". I have had other lovers recently, and let me tell you, none compare to how good my soon to be ex really was. The attraction will probably never go away, but the love has to. He destroyed me. I do still believe in love, and am experimenting with all different signs now. Good luck to you all in your Taurean relationships. For me, I think I'll move on to Fire or Air Signs.
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Once a Taurus claims you as his possession, that's it, you're his until further notice. Possessive and jealous are the bulls. Oh yeah, it takes quite a bit to stir them up, but when heated watch out! I find Librans like to 'debate' and don't consider playing the devil's advocate anything other than having another perspective. Many other signs tend to disagree, Taurus being one of them.
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I find with my Taurus male that he doesnt fit the bill of a typical Taurus. Tizzie, I agree with you on the possession part that is very true. But with my male he lacks the ability for passion or intimacy. Very strange, Ive never met a man that had no clue. Most men just avoid it, this one really doesnt get it. Im staying in the relationship for the time being, mainly because we get along so well and he is so understanding. But I dont know if passion and intimacy can be taught or if at my age i have the patience to teach. I find that with things the way they are, I have pulled way back and my feelings are that of deep friendship now. I know he doesnt feel this way, he is in love and expressing it the best he knows how. But the Libra in me needs the passion and the romance. Wondering if anyone else has been through this? Im thinking not, its just not Taurian...
Sunshine...
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Hi Sunshine,
Nope doesn't sound to Taurean, although we are all unique, within our signs, which I only take as a guideline, and not an absolute truth. The object of my affection is a Taurus and he is most certainly passionate and intimate. He also does the periodic disappearing act which I keep reading about, however it's never for long and I don't worry about it too much. He has my complete trust, which I think is a huge issue with most relationships, not just Bulls/Scales.
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I don't know his exact birth time, but he is a leo rising, venus in taurus and mars in scorpio.
Besides disappearing, he also ALWAYS waits for me to make the first contact. This used to bother me, because I was raised to think that calling a man was "unladylike", so the waiting game could go on for weeks. The ball seems to permanently be in my court with him, so I just pick it up and go with it, I no longer have a problem with that. The way I see it, if I don't take the initiative, I don't get what I want either, and ooooooooooo yeah, I WANT! hehe.
I just make sure to be ultra ladylike in all other regards, to sort of make up for having to be so "forward". (a balance thing? Perhaps.)
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Haha, aggressive I am not! This is the difficulty I am having with this particular Taurus, I have to be somewhat aggressive, or I sit and wait....and wait, and wait. I've stopped pondering about why it has to be that way, and now I just get on with it and call or whatever I need to do. So long as the end result is the same Big Grin
Is there some kind of internal need to be persued in the Taurean character? I sometimes hesitate to contact him because I don't want to seem like a pest, though he assures me that I am not.
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Hi yatayatahey,
I havent had to deal with the disappearing act, he seems to stick around all the time. Your right about the agressive thing, my guy needs that as well. I'd be waiting forever if I didnt say anything. Its like he is stuck in his own little world. The intimacy I wrote about earlier, I finally talked to him last night. He sees what I am saying (try explaining intimacy to someone), and says Im not the first to bring up the subject to him. He said he never really understood what women meant, but he said I explained it well. He is usually very good at taking a look at himself after things are brought to his attention. We'll see what happens. I find with my Taurus, the more independent I am, the more he chases me. I really think he needs me to be a bit aloof, thats when he seems the happiest. I still cant figure him out..LOL
Sunshine...
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Don't they just drive ya NUTS? The reverse is also true, the more aloof and "mysterious" he is, the more I want to take up the chase! Just fuels the fire for me. I make a point of making him wait, though. Well, it's more my own reluctance to be forward, but if it works, it works. It must be the Libra thing with me though, the more I think I want to figure him out, the more intrigued I am by his elusiveness. It's maddening, and great at the same time.
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Any of you Bulls listening in care to comment?
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An incredible strategist, hmmmmmmm. Oh yeah, I think that fits the bill, entirely.
As far as, all the eggs in one basket, I'm cool with him having a clutch of them. I'm not possessive like that. I even know some of his ex trysts that would cut off their right arm to have another go. hehe. He definitely keeps them dangling. I just gained my independence, I'm not giving it up any time soon, and he knows this. It makes for a very very intriguing relationship, I tell ya.
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