Librans attraction, mate prospect and just sex

This topic was created in the Libra forum by Queenscorpio on Friday, July 27, 2007 and has 25 replies.
Okay guys a friend of mine (girl) asked me this question about a Libra guy and for the first time, I really didn't know the answer, she is also a scorp with a lot of fire and air in her chart.
Her question:I have been FWB with this Libra, we are cool and can talk about anything, now he has girlfriend long distant relationship and he is still trying to have sex with me except now he doesn't want to hang out, because his new girlfriend's sister lives in my city and if she sees him with me or any other woman, it might get back. He hugs me when we see eachother and tell me he misses me when we are apart. I don't really want a relationship with him because it is obvious he can't be faithful, but the sex and attraction is uncontrolable and he won't stay away and niether can she. Is he into me just because of the sex and attraction or if the situation was different would he even want me as a mate?
My answer: Wow that is a good one. In my experience, Libras don't shag women they are not attracted to in one sense or another, however, I have known some who don't consider who their shagging as a potential mate for whatever reason, however, some start as FWB and have fallen for the woman (1 or two I know of not many) and some just don't date FWB's. I really didn't have a direct answer for her.
Would ya libras, let a sista know, cause this girl is bugging me.
IMO she is just sex. If he wanted a relationship with her, he would have committed to her not the other girl. He obviously doesn't care that much or he would want to spend time with her and do nice things for her and commit to her.
* I don't really want a relationship with him because it is obvious he can't be faithful,
This and
* if the situation was different would he even want me as a mate?
Are in opposition to each other. She needs to be more honest with herself. That being said the situation WAS different. He didn't have a girlfriend and now he does. He picked someone other than her as his mate. Obviously that speaks volumes, at least to me.
I think that neither girlfriend is considered permanent material. He's clearly putting neither on a pedestal by still shagging someone else. Libra becomes very exclusive when serious.
Ultimately her only question can be 'will I be his girlfriend?' and the answer unfortunately is no.
What is his culture, by the way?
He's only in it for the sex. If he was truly interested in her, he would have started a relationship with her (locally) rather than a long-distance one. Also, it would make me wonder how many other "long distance" relationships he has and if they know about the other(s).
The point is she is only in it for the sex, she claims she can't have a real relationship with someone who clearly can't be faithful. She doesn't want HIM to fall for her. She is single, no relationship. She is crystal clear about the fact that he is horrible relationship material. I did tell her, she shouldn't be shagging someone elses man. Although he clearly isn't acting like he is anybody's man. So she doesn't really care if he is seeing others. I know it is all way too much for me to think about. Too much drama.
I told her to leave him alone and find another shag buddy, but the reality is if you are just FWB's and not in a relationship with whomever, it is possible that person could be shaggin others anyway. This is why she says she protects her self at all costs, cause you never know. BTW, he is always calling her and trying to hook up. I have seen it. She says she doesn't want any strings of any kind right now, just a good time and she looooovvvvveeees shagging him.
BTW, Libra, they are African American, wait he might be mixed with Italian I think. I dunno for sure.
Then what is the issue altogether?
Libra, the issue with her (again, she claims) is that before he kept hinting he wanted more, or started wanting more of her time and she says although she likes to shag him, she doesn't want him to start having feelings for her (she doesn't want to hurt him) she wants to keep it clear about the FWB, and now that he has a g/f per se. She thought she wouldn't have to worry about him getting attached to her.
I personally don't think he is in the mind set to be attached to anyone. Just like shagging around or just want to be FWB's with them both. I don't know I just told her I would pass it on to my dxp colleagues, because maybe I was missing somethin. It is exhausting me now. I got my own probs.
**** if the situation was different would he even want me as a mate?***
Funny, LS, I thought the exact same thing. I mentioned that and she claims (again) that she made that statement cause she didn't want him to have any intentions at all, as he had at one time.
Whatever... I am done. Thanks guys. I agree with you all. Why bother period. I am sure he isn't the last good shag on the planet.
This is a bit too dramatic a view for your average Libra. Be sure of that...
If you're getting tired of the whole story, QS, just tell her that he will definitely be falling for her deeply by keeping this going! LOL...
* I am sure he isn't the last good shag on the planet.
None of them are me dear! lol!
I don't know. My spider senses are tingling. I think she is way in self-denial or out right lying. It just doesn't feel right to me.
'Cause he is dating someone else ... so obviously he has feeling for the other person not her. She would be the second not the primary relationship. In her mind, him getting into a primary relaitonship with someone else should be SCORE. Instead she is analyzing. Maybe I am wrong but it feels like she is lying to you and/or herself.

LOL!!! Yeah, I think she might not be being honest with herself. Whatevr, she can figure it out and I bought it to my dxp buddies per her request. I will give her the feedback and walk away, this is too draining for a scorp friend too, not just a Libra.
The fishy part is this. As I am a scorp with mostly fire and air in my chart just like her and either it is or it isn't and I am fine with whatever space I am in.
When I wasn't ready for a relationship I was fine with FWB, but when I thoguht I was ready I was straight about it and the other party wasn't hence, I moved on and ran into my Libra here on DXP. I just think I see things a lot simpler than others. Yeah she is lying to herself. Getting feelings or maybe now that he is in a relationship (per se) now she wants what is supposed to be forbidden. You know?
That is how I see it.
Now that he is in a relationship, she is insisting that she doesn't want him to form an attachement to her. Well, he is already attached to someone else. She was denied the attachment so she is protecting herself by reversing the whole thing.
I dunno. I could be wrong.
Have a good end Queenie et all.
Small aside:
I always think it is so odd when people try to win others through sex. Like *their sex* is the ultimate experience, some sacred gift that God gave them that makes them better than everyone else. Ummmm no. It isn't. It's just sex.
People need to get over their own genitalia.
On that happy note, have a good night all!
smile
What is his gf's zodiac??? The reason why he is attracted to this girl can explain why he is secretive with the scorp girl. May be he thinks that may not work and dont want to jump away from the scorp.
I think she said his girlfriend is a Sag...
lol... he is feeling better with sag when it comes to communication and better with scorp when it comes to emotions and sex. Scorp cannot reach the expectations of a libra when he wants to be philosophical. And its hard to get truth from a scorp. She will always hide a little bit here and there and we despise that. Saggi is more honest. Lies only for 24 hrs and after that she will tell the truth and we find it more comfortable in that department.

I dont think he will stick to one and will keep swinging btween two.
Really ,the Libran? I thougth Scorps are very philosophical !At least that's what my Libra told me , but then again it might due to my Sag rising signsmile Everybody first met me would think of me as a Sag rather than Scorp !
Most people who meet me think I'm a Leo. LOL I don't have any Leo in my chart though. My rising is Sag also.
I do agree with LS about your friend turning things around now that there's someone else in the picture. Bottom line, though - he's not the faithful kind. THerefore, even though he's being honest with her now by saying he's someone long-distance, he's already laid the foundation to lie in the future to her and others. He has not scruples about shagging more than one person at a time, and that's a scary thought - maybe that's the Taurus in me, but that just seems fishy.
*high fives HP*
Agree! If she wants an open relationship, it might be possible but probably not because he is incapable of honesty and open relationships are reliant on honesty. Basically the chap has bad character. She is welcome to him but eyes open and no crying about when he proves true to his character and treats her with the same disrespect.
"I think that neither girlfriend is considered permanent material. He's clearly putting neither on a pedestal by still shagging someone else. Libra becomes very exclusive when serious.
Ultimately her only question can be 'will I be his girlfriend?' and the answer unfortunately is no."
This is definitely the answer.