The Death Test

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looneybird
@looneybird
20 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 1362 · Topics: 217
According to our research, you'll be dead by

October 2045
at age 82

probable cause -


heart attack


YOU DIE: 82.4 years

AVERAGE FEMALE LIFE SPAN: 77.1 years

WHY YOU DIE?
56% heart attack
24% ulcers/bowel toughness
13% loneliness
5% drowning of the lungs
2% wounds

A FEW COLLECTED STATISTICS
Across all 649405 test takers.



27% smoke.

67% have health insurance.

8% eat a lot of nice beef.

62% hold in farts.

20% are impressed with themselves.
The top cause of death among relatives was cancer.
The most widely suffered ailment among takers is high blood pressure.
The average day for an OkCupid user involves 7.8 hours of sleep and 1.1 movements of the bowel.