Twin Flame or Lesson

I'm not actually looking or whatever for my twin flame/soul mate/whatever, but I honestly feel if any of the women I've liked are it, then obviously, we'll be seeing each other again in a different lifetime because after giving the impression of interest, they then proceed to loathe me when they see I am receptive and would LOVE to at least go out on a date and see what happens. Of coarse, not everyone is a twin flame, that's not possible. In trying to stay positive, I have decided that because everything happens for a reason, either I am supposed to learn something from them, or they are supposed to learn something from me, or we are both supposed to learn something from each other.

However, on a different thread about twin flames on this forum, a Sagittarius mentioned that there is a point where one person becomes afraid of losing the other and basically starts to panic. I don't think either of us felt that. I certainly have done nothing of the sort. Sadly, while Capricorn was definitely interested in me(the only reason I know she exists is because she liked me first and was very obvious about it), this asshole told her something about me that effectively ruined my chances of finally being in a relationship. It isn't a problem because it's nothing bad, but she's made a problem of it. I am disappointed because to me, it's like she doesn't trust me. It's a really petty thing. While I've done what I've can to avoid her since I don't need to deal with additional bullshit, I've done what I've can to keep to myself when she's around. I try to forget her, but she lives on in my mind. She keeps popping up. Literally and figuratively. The day after she snapped at me, I was paying attention to what I was doing at that particular time but know she was staring at me while she walked by. The day after that, someone who knows how I feel/felt kept calling me because she was there for a significant amount of time(this is important because she's usually not there anymore). The shithead responsible for fucking up what would have been a romantic relationship walked by with his head held down in shame. There are moments he won't stop staring to see what I'm doing(amongst all the other things I'm doing, I hope his marriage fails courtesy of someone doing to him what he did to me).

I knew she'd be at work today because I saw her super early at a time that I should not. Later on during the day, I was strolling outside when I wanted to momentarily escape work(I love being outside at night just walking around and quiet places) and people and accidentally found what I'm going to call her secret place. I find this knowledge awkward because I don't want her to think of me what she probably thought when she snapped. Besides the fact that she has a secret place and it's technically the same as mine, when I first saw her, there was a certain feeling. There is always a feeling. I'm still somewhat fond of her, though I wish to forget and never see her again if I must come back. I've never felt such heart break before. Is this a common occurrence? I am hoping this is just another lesson. Anyone else relate to this horrid madness? What is the reason for this? 😭

Hi there. I'm curious to know what your sign is.

The twin flame connection is a unique one and, if there's any validity whatsoever to the twin flame concept, only ONE exists for each person on earth. The twin flame is someone with whom you bond extremely strongly with nearly immediately. You become really close, share a bunch of stuff together. The bond becomes so overwhelmingly strong that one of the 2 individuals feels the need to flee out of fear of losing themselves. The situation your describing doesn't sound like a twin-flame thing, but rather an unfortunate sequence of events brought on by a shit-disturber at work.

A soul mate connection on the other hand is usually very positive in nature and is about two people who get along on a fundamental level. No one runs away in this relationship because both people involved just GET each other. The ""theory" is that a person can have many soul mates in life, ranging from your best friend to your future spouse, for example.

*points at avatar* I'm a Taurus. Thing is, what I felt towards her is something I've never felt towards anyone else. You may be right though, as I tried to deny what I felt for a time because I was interested in someone else. This is why I think that if this isn't the case, there is still a reason for the relationship to have happened.

Posted by SpiceNSugar
Hi there. I'm curious to know what your sign is.

The twin flame connection is a unique one and, if there's any validity whatsoever to the twin flame concept, only ONE exists for each person on earth. The twin flame is someone with whom you bond extremely strongly with nearly immediately. You become really close, share a bunch of stuff together. The bond becomes so overwhelmingly strong that one of the 2 individuals feels the need to flee out of fear of losing themselves. The situation your describing doesn't sound like a twin-flame thing, but rather an unfortunate sequence of events brought on by a shit-disturber at work.

A soul mate connection on the other hand is usually very positive in nature and is about two people who get along on a fundamental level. No one runs away in this relationship because both people involved just GET each other. The ""theory" is that a person can have many soul mates in life, ranging from your best friend to your future spouse, for example.

^^^^^
+1

Posted by 2N3R
*points at avatar* I'm a Taurus. Thing is, what I felt towards her is something I've never felt towards anyone else. You may be right though, as I tried to deny what I felt for a time because I was interested in someone else. This is why I think that if this isn't the case, there is still a reason for the relationship to have happened.

Oops! Sorry I missed it on your AVI.

You know, there's far too much hype placed on this "theory" of twin flames.

Of course, this relationship happened for a reason! If YOU have grown and gotten something out of this experience with her, THAT is what matters. It doesn't have to have a name attached to it.

If it has taught you something about yourself and about how to handle future relationships, then all the better. Give yourself a pat on the back!

It hasn't taught me anything, though. 😆 This is why I'm still trying to figure out what exactly this was all about. Maybe it would have been more proper to have placed this elsewhere and give it a different title related to how these failures are not complete failures because there is something to be gained. I just wonder what it is that I am to learn, but since I haven't, maybe I taught something.

I've said this before, but it isn't just feelings that determine if someone is your twin flame. There's been someone in my life that I've felt extreme emotions for and a connection, but even after that, I don't think they're my twin flame. It doesn't seem to me you think she is your twin flame, though, as seen by the first few sentences of your second paragraph. From the information you gave, I would agree with that.

I can't truly say one way or another if this person you speak of is even a soul mate. Imo, you have to have had something developed already for you to know the reality of why you feel a certain way. If you have worked at a close relationship (any kind, really) then you'd be able to determine why you feel certain ways...are you this way because you're *insert emotion* or are you this way because you truly understand the nature and reality of the relationship? It's like human emotions vs reality and it's sometimes hard to determine which one your actions are caused by. One might think someone is their twin flame or soul mate based on how they feel, but if they were able to truly look outside of themselves, they may not see things the same way. Is the reason you're drawn to her and like her because of some human element, like admiration, or is it truly a connection of the soul? That's rhetorical. If you haven't figured that out it would be a good question to ponder for answers. Anyway, I went off on a tangent. If you haven't learned anything, then chances are your relationship to her is not currently and hasn't been very significant. Or, she has nothing to teach you or you haven't faced the right kind of conflict yet. Or (yes, another one), you THINK you haven't learned anything from it but actually, you have. That can happen, too, especially if the lesson is small and not very noticeable. It may take a reflective moment to catch.

In the end, there's many possibilities as to why and what. I wouldn't say twin flame, personally. If your relationship ends up developing more then you may be able to determine if she is a soul mate or whatever else. If it doesn't develop, even in the future, then she is likely not any of these things. I personally think there will be a lesson to learn in this. You say you "haven't felt such heart break before". Sounds to me like a new situation that you can learn from. How do you deal with this heart break? Will feeling this way about someone help you grow or make you more closed off to relationships? If some

The reason I felt so broken was because she is the first person who made me want to talk and whom I enjoyed listening to, and it would have resulted in something had this idiot not told her what he said. It felt as if we could go on forever, and I don't talk!! Also while it was meaningful as it was, I could have had something much more meaningful, which is what I was starting to work towards, but then my efforts were reduced to pointlessness. I guess in retrospect, I have learned that besides the superficial physical stuff and someone with similar interests, I should also be looking for someone who makes me want to talk.