Posted by WaterCup
I never apologise.
Posted by RabbitPosted by CancerOnTheCusp
I apologize for piecake. Its become the crystal meth of the bakery world....
I'm experimenting with piefruitcake.click to expand
Posted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
Posted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
Posted by seraphPosted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
So you are incapable of feeling remorse?
Surely not. You might have meant to do what you did at the time, but that's why we have the benefit of retrospect - a second look at what we might have done.
Saying that what you did - no matter how horrible - was deserved "at the time", is really a cop-out intended to give yourself the luxury of taking a pass on any moral considerations after the fact; considerations which, by the way, often need to be made.
Having a moral compass also means being cognizant about right and wrong, and being able to genuinely acknowledge that recognition in yourself and in others. Some apologies are indeed genuine, and the ones that are, are gold, because you get to connect with someone on a level deep enough to acknowledge and respect their vulnerabilities. So apologies can do a lot of good for both the giver and receiver.click to expand
Posted by RabbitPosted by CancerOnTheCuspPosted by RabbitPosted by CancerOnTheCusp
I apologize for piecake. Its become the crystal meth of the bakery world....
I'm experimenting with piefruitcake.
I'll let you use my distribution network for a cut of the profits..
I'm thinking the fruitcake part with lengthen shelf life allowing for export of a fresher product.
I'm think of packaging with David Hasslehoffs face on it and selling it to the Germans.click to expand
Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPalPosted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
My original quoting you was actually a tease about the different spellings of apologize vs apologise depending on where you are in this great big world.
As for this statement above, that's rough.... I think the ability to give genuine apologies is a sign of good character. If someone comes to me to tell me that my words or actions have hurt them I reflect on that and am very likely to apologize....
And yes, I completely agree that true and heartfelt apologies do not include the word "but". I also believe the main trademark of an apology is striving above and beyond not to repeat the behavior otherwise the apology is null and void.
It would be a bold, perhaps even an arrogant statement, in my mind, to say that I have never done anything warranting an apology.click to expand
Posted by aquapiscescuspPosted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
Well, how about an apology if you are late to something and someone has been waiting...? Or you forgot to do something you promised and so on...?click to expand
Posted by xcake
Actions speak louder than words.
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Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Fair enough WC, I think we all know what it's like to be fed up and up to your eyeballs in it.
Hopefully, those people who are inconsiderate of you are far, far away in your past and that you have many more genuine people in store for you.
Thing is though, in every relationship, in every friendship.... feelings get hurt, there are misunderstandings, shit just kinda gets jumbled.... I think it's very, very, very amazing when a person can apologize without being defensive (and of course, mean it).
And for the record, I don't accept or make apologies like this:
"I'm sorry you walked in on me fucking your sister/brother, I just slipped and fell into her vagina/on to his manstick."
But I do make and receive ones like these:
"I had no idea my words or actions were making you feel this way. You are very important to me and it is paramount to me not to ever make you feel that way. Thank you for bringing this to my attention and I want you to know I will do everything I can to prevent you from ever feeling this way again."
Posted by seraph
Shit, you don't even have to take out a classified ad to even make it.
Posted by GetMisted
GemFiregirl is never going to apologize.click to expand
Posted by PotHeadVirgo24
Fucking air signs all sensitive & shit.
Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
WC - I understand this "I prefer people who think before they speak to me because I'm easily hurt when I care."
However, if you are of the sensitive nature, I find that sometimes those are the types who will take something out of context and get their feelings hurt. In that moment it's very easy to ask for clarification, but few do. So later, when it comes out... an apology is do.
For example, very recently I felt like some of my closest girlfriends continually went on about their problems that I felt were trivial in comparison to a massive life event I have been dealing with. I finally had to tell them that I felt like they were inconsiderate of where I am emotionally.
This would be in my mind a series of moments when I should have spoken up and didn't, where I let things build up rather than saying something. I went to them and explained very honestly where I was at, they apologized because they hadn't realized that they were being inconsiderate of where I was emotionally and that sometimes I can't handle you calling me to bitch about how your husband left the toilet seat up. In turn, I apologized for not saying something earlier.
No harm, no foul.... sometimes people just have to be honest and sometimes apologies are needed. Now my girlfriends could have gotten defensive and told me it was my fault I felt that way and blah, blah, blah, but they didn't.... even though it wasn't something they did on PURPOSE, they saw the need for an apology and I realized they were also due one.
That's bonding. People cannot always be perfect.... that's a long fall down.
Posted by WaterCup
I mean people SHOULD know what's hurtful & what isn't. So saying, you didn't know that something was hurtful is bullshit
Posted by shellshockerPosted by WaterCup
I mean people SHOULD know what's hurtful & what isn't. So saying, you didn't know that something was hurtful is bullshit
It no longer surprises me at what people don't know. many people just aren't raised right. I work with kids and sometimes I have to wonder what the hell is wrong with some of them. Then I meet the parents... omg, so many varying levels of stupidity to behold. The kids can learn but is it game over their parents? please lord no
People learn from making mistakes and growing from them. When someone generally lacks awareness in a situation, takes time to reflect on how their actions have affected others and apologizes with the intent to not repeat said behaviour in the future.... I can appreciate that. I'm all for reducing the number of asinine acts in this world... just 1 less makes a difference.
Tho I agree apologies are more for the one saying sorry.click to expand
Posted by WaterCup
Apologies are hard for me to understand & I don't fully accept them either from grown people. Well unless they have mental issues, or other disorders that make them unable to think straight.. therefore cannot be held accountable for any of their actions. A sane person that does something that they know is going to be hurtful, damaging, etc & yet expect it to be forgiven by just saying how sorry they are is full of shit imho.
I don't say sorry because I'm really not... everything I say or do is deserved, AT THE TIME. So I won't turn around & fake an apology. Sorry
Posted by WaterCupPosted by shellshockerPosted by WaterCup
I mean people SHOULD know what's hurtful & what isn't. So saying, you didn't know that something was hurtful is bullshit
People learn from making mistakes and growing from them. When someone generally lacks awareness in a situation, takes time to reflect on how their actions have affected others and apologizes with the intent to not repeat said behaviour in the future.... I can appreciate that. I'm all for reducing the number of asinine acts in this world... just 1 less makes a difference.
Tho I agree apologies are more for the one saying sorry.
LOL! Yeah, but very few actually learn from their past mistakes imo. Or they do the same thing in a different way expecting different results. And not forgetting that most do say sorry so they could get out of the dog house, no real meaning behind the words. People are really full of shit.click to expand
Posted by shellshocker
Wether an apology is heartfelt or empty.. it's still not going to get you out of the doghouse with me if the act and intent were nasty.
I really hope they mean it and can grow because one of the consequences for their mistake is I'm not dealing with them anymore. I don't hesitate to lock someone out and keep things cordial yet surface.
Honestly, most people I've come across don't even bother to apologize and they know they wrong, just like you mentioned. I've experienced much more justifying and excuse making
Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Anyone..... maybe have one they want to make?
Posted by ScorpioFish
I would apologize to the asshole trolls out there....
....But they would still be asshole trolls to the decent folks around here....
....and they would still deserve to be stuffed into a glass display case.
....So no...
Posted by seraph
So you are incapable of feeling remorse?
Surely not. You might have meant to do what you did at the time, but that's why we have the benefit of retrospect - a second look at what we might have done.
Saying that what you did - no matter how horrible - was deserved "at the time", is really a cop-out intended to give yourself the luxury of taking a pass on any moral considerations after the fact; considerations which, by the way, often need to be made.
Having a moral compass also means being cognizant about right and wrong, and being able to genuinely acknowledge that recognition in yourself and in others. Some apologies are indeed genuine, and the ones that are, are gold, because you get to connect with someone on a level deep enough to acknowledge and respect their vulnerabilities. So apologies can do a lot of good for both the giver and receiver.
Posted by scribble
Apologies that don't come with "but".
Posted by LetltBPosted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Anyone..... maybe have one they want to make?
I see what's going on here. roflmao
If it's not the bluemoon character it's something else. Like I said, those of you who believe someone has deleted..they are not far at all.
Gemcandle should be swooping in any time now....lol
This is just too predictable.click to expand
Posted by xcake
Notice how dead it is and slowly old users coming back. That's the way it is. DXPs way of maintaining order.
DXP RELOADED
Posted by seraph
No LIB, I'm not GemsRa or Elle, nor am I anyone else who's commented in this thread.
I am SO sorry.
Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Sooooo..... I guess that's a no then?
Strangely enough I had heard that this person felt great remorse for their actions, buuuuuut I guess that was just bullshit.
Apologies are still cool in my book though, especially when I still have fancy screenshots of your nasty words.
Posted by seraph
Remorseful is as remorseful does, GemsRa. What you're getting now is what they're capable of, unfortunately. If they cared about how their actions affected you, they would have set things aright almost immediately.
All in all, no one needs to be the instrument of justice in this individual's life. Because there's a universal justice that will catch up with them. What goes around comes right back around, and often in a big way. And who knows what form it'll take.
You'll get your justice - no doubt about that, but when you do you'll be too busy being great to take much notice.
Posted by tizianiPosted by LetltB
Maybe it will help in the healing process of the internet trauma you've been subjected to. But then again, if it was so traumatic and "nasty", why the hell would you want to share it AGAIN in a public forum AGAIN?
Hahahaha it defies logicclick to expand
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