Posted by dilettanteTHATS NOT ILLEGALPosted by _Dazed
@dilettante Shoplifting lube and cans of fancy feast.
@_dazed for being annoyingclick to expand
Posted by LaPetiteEtoilePosted by CuddleBug1288
I don't even wanna think about being locked in a cell...I'd have a major anxiety attack 😂😅🙈
It’s quite peaceful. And they give you romance novels to pass the time comfortably.
😂click to expand
Posted by MetatronI saw a cartoon about that once.
firebunny for sending seraphlight into ands' favorite latte shop, to distract him and his gf, while he attempts to kidnap Rocket....
Posted by xXxAliiciaXxXWow.. Surprised I wasn't the first mentioned for that.
Cuteboy for cyberstalking
Posted by _DazedHahaha! I've went to go get some 2 weekends in a row
@saggurl88 Ignoring martial law to get some dick.
Posted by LaPetiteEtoileHomicide stemming from marital dispute. Husband asked why dinner wasn't on the table yet.
Definitely Murder.
Posted by boundtoglowI don’t even want to comment lol because this could be true already 😌
Rom- insider trading 6months at the white people prison
Posted by saggurl88I’m 100000% judging you on this one 👏Posted by _Dazed
@saggurl88 Ignoring martial law to get some dick.
Hahaha! I've went to go get some 2 weekends in a rowclick to expand
Posted by Romz-I’m dating a Virgo and both of us work by ourselves in offices.Posted by saggurl88Posted by _Dazed
@saggurl88 Ignoring martial law to get some dick.
Hahaha! I've went to go get some 2 weekends in a row
I’m 100000% judging you on this one 👏
You told me I couldn’t go to the farmers market before this quarantine was even a real thing 😠
Now you’re getting tinder salami 🍆 during the height of Rona?
Ur ancestors are watching 👀 and the Rona too 🦠click to expand
Posted by saggurl88Is his penis longer than 6ft?Posted by Romz-Posted by saggurl88Posted by _Dazed
@saggurl88 Ignoring martial law to get some dick.
Hahaha! I've went to go get some 2 weekends in a row
I’m 100000% judging you on this one 👏
You told me I couldn’t go to the farmers market before this quarantine was even a real thing 😠
Now you’re getting tinder salami 🍆 during the height of Rona?
Ur ancestors are watching 👀 and the Rona too 🦠
I’m dating a Virgo and both of us work by ourselves in offices.
I’m also not high risk carrying precious cargo. 🤰
We saw each other a couple of weekends ago and since it was all good, IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE 😩😈, I went back last weekend for more.
We practice social distancing by not kissing on the mouth and keeping to the body only. 😋
I’ll be busy this weekend, so it will be a couple of weeks before I see him again. 🥴click to expand
Posted by 40Caliberwut
I'm pretty sure I'd go to jail for making beastiality porn. 🤠
Nobody has to wonder about me at all!
Posted by _Dazed6 FEET!!! 🤢🤐😵🤕Posted by saggurl88Posted by Romz-Posted by saggurl88Posted by _Dazed
@saggurl88 Ignoring martial law to get some dick.
Hahaha! I've went to go get some 2 weekends in a row
I’m 100000% judging you on this one 👏
You told me I couldn’t go to the farmers market before this quarantine was even a real thing 😠
Now you’re getting tinder salami 🍆 during the height of Rona?
Ur ancestors are watching 👀 and the Rona too 🦠
I’m dating a Virgo and both of us work by ourselves in offices.
I’m also not high risk carrying precious cargo. 🤰
We saw each other a couple of weekends ago and since it was all good, IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE 😩😈, I went back last weekend for more.
We practice social distancing by not kissing on the mouth and keeping to the body only. 😋
I’ll be busy this weekend, so it will be a couple of weeks before I see him again. 🥴
Is his penis longer than 6ft?click to expand
Posted by 40CaliberNot sure if this is a joke or not.Posted by _DazedPosted by 40Caliber
I'm pretty sure I'd go to jail for making beastiality porn. 🤠
Nobody has to wonder about me at all!
wut
Me. Sheep. Edge of cliff.
😁click to expand
Posted by LaPetiteEtoileI cannot confirm that the officers he assaulted were female.Posted by _Dazed
I'd do one for @ItsSupes2 but there's a high probability he'd be let off easy, and have the option of "serving" in the military behind the wire once again.
She asked for it.click to expand
Posted by nikkistarNope. Didn't download it. @Unwording mailed me a flash drive.
@_Dazed
For illegally downloading tentacle porn
Posted by _DazedShe can't do that in federal prison for poaching endangered squids, man.Posted by nikkistar
@_Dazed
For illegally downloading tentacle porn
Nope. Didn't download it. @Unwording mailed me a flash drive.click to expand
Posted by nikkistarFine. She smuggled it out to me in her prison purse during my visit.Posted by _DazedPosted by nikkistar
@_Dazed
For illegally downloading tentacle porn
Nope. Didn't download it. @Unwording mailed me a flash drive.
She can't do that in federal prison for poaching endangered squids, man.click to expand
Posted by tizianiLol you’re such a trash panda 🐼....Posted by boundtoglow
Rom- insider trading 6months at the white people prison
More like a boiler room selling junk stock.
Conspiracy theory magazines as the office reading material.click to expand
Posted by UnwordingSometimes sacrifices must be made ❤Posted by _DazedPosted by nikkistar
@_Dazed
For illegally downloading tentacle porn
Nope. Didn't download it. @Unwording mailed me a flash drive.
Prolly how I ended up in prison.click to expand
Posted by Arielle83LOL I saw the notification that you posted in this thread and that's immediately the first thought that came to mind for you 🤣
Stealing cats