PinkySagLove
@mzmee
19 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 0 · Posts: 1480 · Topics: 46
My sisters don't act like sisters
Two things ......
1. so long as you're not sharing the happenings of your life with them, they are going to be pushy with you because they will believe that you think you are above them. which you do think because you are. Meaning, you believe you are above the drama and pettiness. So, for them to have this attitude toward you is normal.
It's not going to stop though, they will continue with it because they are insecure, and you're ignoring these bad things and choosing not to participate is triggering their insecurities.
What I can tell you in hope .... is that, eventhough it appears to you as if they are in contention with you, or maybe contrast is a better word .. in reality, they have great respect for you. Respect that you are able to rise above the pettiness, in where they aren't strong enough and fall prey to themselves.
2. Sags have a blind spot, in where they cannot see a certain reality. They give with expectations ... even if they think they aren't expecting something in return, they are. And it's likely you cannot do anything about this, because like I said .. it's a blindspot.
Look at your first few sentences ... you believe that because you are supportive of them, and that you fight for them ... then they SHOULD return the same support to you. And though it would be nice if every person would be considerate enough to return such things ... they don't.
People don't have an obligation to return anything to you, or do anything to/for you.
But, as a Sag, you have the mindset that because they SHOULD do it, then you cannot see past that, and will react to it, as if this expectation of them isn't irrational. Which it is irrational. I know you can't see it .. but, I said it just in case you can see beyond.
I have never experienced this kind of sibling rivalry. However, my husband comes as a boy from all girl siblings and let me tell you .. they are the epitome of ridiculous when it comes to bickering, and over exaggerating everything. Just watching them carry on is so sad that you almost want to hand them a gun to put themselves out of their misery.
And they are now in their 50's and STILL the same.
So, in summation .... it's not going to stop. The only thing you can do is continue to take the high roads, and not let it bother you.
We took baths together, rubbed lotion on each other's backs when we were kids, how can I ever think I'm better than my sisters? I dont like the drama, I try to let my other sisters know that we shouldn't talk about the other sisters when they're going thru stuff, we should talk TO them and support them. That's what sisters are for.
Me giving and being supportive doesnt come from doing it for them with the expectations of getting it back, it comes from this:
I have friwnds with sisters, they have the most beautiful relationships with their sisters. They get into spats, it's normal, but when they come together to support one another, my god, it's such a beautiful thing. That's how I imaged us with each other as we got older. I imagined my sisters as life long friends. I support them because I want them to feel loved. I want them to know that in whatever, they know they have someone they can count on. That is a beautiful feeling to have. To know if all else fails, at least you can go to your sisters for comfort. I want us all to feel that way towards each other.
Me giving and being supportive doesnt come from doing it for them with the expectations of getting it back, it comes from this:
I have friwnds with sisters, they have the most beautiful relationships with their sisters. They get into spats, it's normal, but when they come together to support one another, my god, it's such a beautiful thing. That's how I imaged us with each other as we got older. I imagined my sisters as life long friends. I support them because I want them to feel loved. I want them to know that in whatever, they know they have someone they can count on. That is a beautiful feeling to have. To know if all else fails, at least you can go to your sisters for comfort. I want us all to feel that way towards each other.
I'm saying, I love my family. My sisters, it breaks my heart how they go about this. I'm not expecting a total stranger to support me, its family.
Ohana means family
Family means Nobody gets left behind‚‚‚
Couldnt help it, sorry
Ohana means family
Family means Nobody gets left behind‚‚‚
Couldnt help it, sorry
Posted by mzmee
We took baths together, rubbed lotion on each other's backs when we were kids, how can I ever think I'm better than my sisters? I dont like the drama, I try to let my other sisters know that we shouldn't talk about the other sisters when they're going thru stuff, we should talk TO them and support them. That's what sisters are for.
Me giving and being supportive doesnt come from doing it for them with the expectations of getting it back, it comes from this:
I have friwnds with sisters, they have the most beautiful relationships with their sisters. They get into spats, it's normal, but when they come together to support one another, my god, it's such a beautiful thing. That's how I imaged us with each other as we got older. I imagined my sisters as life long friends. I support them because I want them to feel loved. I want them to know that in whatever, they know they have someone they can count on. That is a beautiful feeling to have. To know if all else fails, at least you can go to your sisters for comfort. I want us all to feel that way towards each other.
This is full of your blindspot .... I realize you cannot see it. The above basically describes what you believe they should do/act based off of what you do to/for them.
Posted by starwarsPosted by mzmeeidk why i find this super hilarious 😆
Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
click to expand
It's a pretty good summation of the basic characteristics of all three signs though, lol
Posted by starwars‚‚‚‚‚Posted by mzmeeidk why i find this super hilarious 😆
Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
click to expand
I know all signs aren't like this but this is my reality in my world. My Virgo sister is so two faced tho it's crazy. Well they all have been. I tell them if it's something you dont like instead of holding it in and talking behind their back, why not air it out to the person you feel offended you?
Makes life much easier. I promise.
Sag chicks are prone to Schizophrenia so you might just be imagining things..do your sisters tell you that you're crazy sometimes?
Posted by starwarsThey'll sit and smoke weed together. I dont smoke and I dont like the smell so Im usually not around for that part. Big accomplishments, no. My Cancer sisterd bday, no one showed. Her husband had a business launch party along with it. When she saw me arrive, her face lit up so bright. I promise, that made my year. I'm glad I made her happy. I still smile thinking about it.
do they gossip about each other but not support each other?
I noticed this too, when one of my other sisters or brothers ask to help, my Virgo sister tries to take over. They end up telling me she said I can't help like she helps, she gets things done better. But it always end up going down thw toilet and she's calling everyone dogging them saying how they played her, but when you get to the bottom of the story, it was her who was being shady. Like wtf?
Posted by P-AngelAm I really being unrealistic in wanting my sisters to want me to feel the same love I show them? I thought that was what family is for.Posted by mzmee
We took baths together, rubbed lotion on each other's backs when we were kids, how can I ever think I'm better than my sisters? I dont like the drama, I try to let my other sisters know that we shouldn't talk about the other sisters when they're going thru stuff, we should talk TO them and support them. That's what sisters are for.
Me giving and being supportive doesnt come from doing it for them with the expectations of getting it back, it comes from this:
I have friwnds with sisters, they have the most beautiful relationships with their sisters. They get into spats, it's normal, but when they come together to support one another, my god, it's such a beautiful thing. That's how I imaged us with each other as we got older. I imagined my sisters as life long friends. I support them because I want them to feel loved. I want them to know that in whatever, they know they have someone they can count on. That is a beautiful feeling to have. To know if all else fails, at least you can go to your sisters for comfort. I want us all to feel that way towards each other.
This is full of your blindspot .... I realize you cannot see it. The above basically describes what you believe they should do/act based off of what you do to/for them.
click to expand
As the eldest, you've probably been catering to
them their entire lives.
They likely have a "blind spot" that won't allow
them to see you as anything other than the Rock
you've always been.
Unfortunately.
When circumstances change, for instance someone gets
married and moves away, and that threesome isn't
so tight, you may get to redefine the nature of your
relationship with one or all of them.
them their entire lives.
They likely have a "blind spot" that won't allow
them to see you as anything other than the Rock
you've always been.
Unfortunately.
When circumstances change, for instance someone gets
married and moves away, and that threesome isn't
so tight, you may get to redefine the nature of your
relationship with one or all of them.
Posted by whatthecrabAnd this is what brings tears to my eyes.
I know a lot of people like them. They aren't interested in your business. Not really. Prying for information on things they already know you clearly don't want to share with them comes from them wanting control over your emotional state. I say that going by how you described them in your opening post: manipulative, drama keeper and taking sides.
The fact that you have decided to not share anything with them anymore is a form of indifference. They can sense it and it hurts them. It doesn't hurt them because it weakens their relationship with you.. it hurts them because they feel powerless. It is never about you.
I know that's incredibily painful to read but the sooner you accept their mental limitations, the better. Accept the fact that they are never going to be the kind of sisters that you want and need them to be. Depending on how taxing they are on your emotional state, either keep them at arms length or entirely cut them out of your life.
Yes, considering this "want" has closed your eyes to the fact that they aren't obligated.
that is what this whole thread is about ..... you have clearly stated in that YOU DO these things for them, and how you're shocked that they aren't treating you back with the same dignity.
That is NOT what family is for, but, you believe it because you are blind to realizing what I'm trying to tell you. You're not alone, all Sags experience this.
Just in this sentence: "wanting my sisters to want me to feel the same love I show them" ... is you stating that in lieu of how you treat/love them, that you believe it should be shown back in like kind. And that's exactly my point.
You are basing how you feel they SHOULD behave on what you are giving to them ... which equals = an expectation
btw, family is for giving/receiving unconditional love. You are stating that you believe they should give you unconditional love, based on the condition that you have provided it to them first.
You're not going to see what I mean ... just as all signs cannot see their blindspot, that's why it's a blindspot. But, it's there and this expectation is only obstacle in your path according to what you have written here.
Judging from your responses, it appears as though the answer you are looking for is how to change them, so they will align with what you believe and want.
when in reality ... the only person you can adjust is yourself.
Posted by starwarsThe Virgo and Scorpio does. They hold grudges over people treating them a certain way. But they dont realize what they did in the first place is the reason they treat them a certain way now. The Cancer, once she vents, she lets off steam.Posted by mzmeedo they hold grudge and such? or is it gone once they vent about it to you?Posted by starwars‚‚‚‚‚Posted by mzmeeidk why i find this super hilarious 😆
Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
I know all signs aren't like this but this is my reality in my world. My Virgo sister is so two faced tho it's crazy. Well they all have been. I tell them if it's something you dont like instead of holding it in and talking behind their back, why not air it out to the person you feel offended you?
Makes life much easier. I promise.
sometimes you cant just blow into people faces and explain to them how assholish they are being. youre pissed to a point you dont wanna have anything to do with them. therefor you vent to someone else whom you trust, once you do its all good.
my sister get into my nerves at times and when i confront her i get a laugh (because my fam know that i get over shit easily) so i need to vent to someone else. (to not just anyone)click to expand
Luckily, I have a group of friends that are very supportive and I love these ladies to life. They've been my rock and I've been there's. The support we give each other is wonderful.
I agree with the replies in this post in trying to get through to the poster that her expectations are beyond - because she can't see it and neither can her sisters. It is what it is. People are the way they are, not the way you think they should be. Family or friends or whatever. We can only be the person we are and we can only change our behavior and outlook. The poster is the oldest and claims she has much better character traits than her younger sisters. This in itself will cause harm - comparing and putting yourself above others. We are here to learn to understand ourselves as well as others through our family and friends.
embrace your differences and love them for who they are - not what you think they should be ...
embrace your differences and love them for who they are - not what you think they should be ...
Posted by starwarsThey do.Posted by mzmeeim not talking about other people.Posted by starwarsThe Virgo and Scorpio does. They hold grudges over people treating them a certain way. But they dont realize what they did in the first place is the reason they treat them a certain way now. The Cancer, once she vents, she lets off steam.Posted by mzmeedo they hold grudge and such? or is it gone once they vent about it to you?Posted by starwars‚‚‚‚‚Posted by mzmeeidk why i find this super hilarious 😆
Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
I know all signs aren't like this but this is my reality in my world. My Virgo sister is so two faced tho it's crazy. Well they all have been. I tell them if it's something you dont like instead of holding it in and talking behind their back, why not air it out to the person you feel offended you?
Makes life much easier. I promise.
sometimes you cant just blow into people faces and explain to them how assholish they are being. youre pissed to a point you dont wanna have anything to do with them. therefor you vent to someone else whom you trust, once you do its all good.
my sister get into my nerves at times and when i confront her i get a laugh (because my fam know that i get over shit easily) so i need to vent to someone else. (to not just anyone)
Luckily, I have a group of friends that are very supportive and I love these ladies to life. They've been my rock and I've been there's. The support we give each other is wonderful.
just between the four of you. do they hold grudge against you or the cancer? if not i see no point in complaining, at least they trust you enough to vent to you. their sister shit isnt getting to anyone outside the circle.click to expand
And they tell everyones business to everyone.
Posted by tctaNever said I had much better character traits, I just dont indulge in dragging my sisters thru the mud. I don't like it either. Telling very personal business to family and non family, how yall know they wanted their info aired out— Things you just dont do to family.
I agree with the replies in this post in trying to get through to the poster that her expectations are beyond - because she can't see it and neither can her sisters. It is what it is. People are the way they are, not the way you think they should be. Family or friends or whatever. We can only be the person we are and we can only change our behavior and outlook. The poster is the oldest and claims she has much better character traits than her younger sisters. This in itself will cause harm - comparing and putting yourself above others. We are here to learn to understand ourselves as well as others through our family and friends.
embrace your differences and love them for who they are - not what you think they should be ...
I'm no where near perfect, I'll cut a mf off real quick, but guess what, I wont do it to family. I'll fuck someone up over family. That's just me. Virgo sister will sit and tell personal business of the other sisters with her friends and talk mess about them to friends. I walked in and had to pull her to the side to tell her, family first. She told me, fuck them bitches. Like wow!!!
My grandmother had to address it one time in a family meeting. My brothers had input on it too. It wasnt a bashing, they got in my ass too. They told me I sometimes act as if I can do it all by myself and wont ask for help. This is true about me tho. I dont like bothering anyone with my issues. Lol.
When it got to my Virgo sister, she started arguing with my grandma, telling my grandma she's not perfect wtf. I stayed but my brothers and cousins left. They couldnt take it. My aunts, uncles and even my parents were very disappointed.
Do I want to change them? If asking for the 3 sisters to supoort each other and not bash each other then I guess so.
Posted by P-AngelThe only thing I do believe is that we all as sisters should be there for each other. I didn't think it was hard to ask. I love how different they are. I just dont indulge in the bullshit they do to one another. I've held this in and vented to no one about this. I appreciate the correction.
Judging from your responses, it appears as though the answer you are looking for is how to change them, so they will align with what you believe and want.
when in reality ... the only person you can adjust is yourself.
I had to tell them we all go thru stuff, with friends, our men, work, everywhere. They'll call me talking about how dumb they are for going thru what they were going when they was just in the same predicament last week. They're dumb for going thru with it yet they'll call each other to get more info on their situation and talk about them like a dog some more. Who does that?
Posted by MontgomeryI know for a fact I spoiled my Cancer sister. Lol. She told me I did and family says it too. My momma told me I was always the one to say "sisters dont do this or that to each other". My Virgo sister knows she can count on me when shes sick or going thru tough times and feel like everyone is judging her for going thru tough times. One thing about my Scorpio sister, when she goes thru, she withdraws like me. I know immediately when something aint right. But I call her anyway to tell her I think about her and love her and that she can call me if she need me. Ahe never does but I tell her anyway lol.
As the eldest, you've probably been catering to
them their entire lives.
They likely have a "blind spot" that won't allow
them to see you as anything other than the Rock
you've always been.
Unfortunately.
When circumstances change, for instance someone gets
married and moves away, and that threesome isn't
so tight, you may get to redefine the nature of your
relationship with one or all of them.
When my Scorpio sister got divorced tho, I talked to her all the time, she took it real hard. We had tons of cry and ice cream sessions. She didnt want anyone to know the details of what happened, and her secret is still safe with me. When my Virgo sister went thru hard times, I was sure to be there so she doesn't feel like she's going at it alone. My Cancer sister called me all the time. Sister time with us all? Nope, dont count on it.
I just want my sisters back. I'm a lot heart broken.
Posted by DAMEN VILmao nah.
Sag chicks are prone to Schizophrenia so you might just be imagining things..do your sisters tell you that you're crazy sometimes?
Posted by P-AngelMy point is, they dont support in ANY way. Not a "hey bitch, you're alive another year, cheers"
Yes, considering this "want" has closed your eyes to the fact that they aren't obligated.
that is what this whole thread is about ..... you have clearly stated in that YOU DO these things for them, and how you're shocked that they aren't treating you back with the same dignity.
That is NOT what family is for, but, you believe it because you are blind to realizing what I'm trying to tell you. You're not alone, all Sags experience this.
Just in this sentence: "wanting my sisters to want me to feel the same love I show them" ... is you stating that in lieu of how you treat/love them, that you believe it should be shown back in like kind. And that's exactly my point.
You are basing how you feel they SHOULD behave on what you are giving to them ... which equals = an expectation
btw, family is for giving/receiving unconditional love. You are stating that you believe they should give you unconditional love, based on the condition that you have provided it to them first.
You're not going to see what I mean ... just as all signs cannot see their blindspot, that's why it's a blindspot. But, it's there and this expectation is only obstacle in your path according to what you have written here.
Nothing.
Nada.
They dont come thru with calls, a text a nothing. I know I can be a little extra when I show support. I'm not even asking for that. I had a baby shower last year. They all said they would show up. I let them know I just wanted to see their faces. The day comes, no show, no call saying I cant make it, no text. I didnt hear from them until a month later. This isnt the first time its happened. They'll flake and I wont hear from them.
Posted by mzmee
I've been thru worse but I just don't tell them. We all go thru things in life, we just have to find our way despite obstacles. I wont talk about them and judge based on how they choose to manuever thur life. I just dont get it.
Posted by mzmeeyes you are, those are your expectations ... "that's how I imagined it would be" ... love is to be given unconditionally, not because we expect something to happen back ...Posted by P-AngelAm I really being unrealistic in wanting my sisters to want me to feel the same love I show them? I thought that was what family is for.Posted by mzmee
We took baths together, rubbed lotion on each other's backs when we were kids, how can I ever think I'm better than my sisters? I dont like the drama, I try to let my other sisters know that we shouldn't talk about the other sisters when they're going thru stuff, we should talk TO them and support them. That's what sisters are for.
Me giving and being supportive doesnt come from doing it for them with the expectations of getting it back, it comes from this:
I have friwnds with sisters, they have the most beautiful relationships with their sisters. They get into spats, it's normal, but when they come together to support one another, my god, it's such a beautiful thing. That's how I imaged us with each other as we got older. I imagined my sisters as life long friends. I support them because I want them to feel loved. I want them to know that in whatever, they know they have someone they can count on. That is a beautiful feeling to have. To know if all else fails, at least you can go to your sisters for comfort. I want us all to feel that way towards each other.
This is full of your blindspot .... I realize you cannot see it. The above basically describes what you believe they should do/act based off of what you do to/for them.
click to expand
Dear Poster - it is not going to be what you want it to be so go on with your strong self and be the great person you are no matter what. Give your family love when you can and do not expect it back. Relish it when it does get returned to you. You are one in a large family and you are one in the world of an even larger family. Realize that people are who they are - they can change, but you can not change them. Continue to provide support in being the loving person and role model you are. If you get down on any of them because of what they do that you do not agree on, then there will be consequences. Consider just distancing yourself from that negative behavior and not drawing attention to it. Draw attention instead to the positive behavior. They may want to be like you someday and they may not. They are not going to do what you want them to do because they are already grown. They are who they have become. It is sad if they are not happy and balanced people but unfortunately this world is full of that.
Ok. I can see that. At that time in my post, I was in my head.
I do wish I can see more of them. The only time I hear from them is if it's initiated by me or if they're talking bad about the other sister.
Holidays, birthdays, graduation, baby shower and other family gatherings I host, they’re not there. My friends didnt even know I had sisters until they saw me at a banquet hall celebrating my grandmothers birthday. These have been friends of over 10 plus years.
They're not active in my life at all. This is the point I make.
Dont wanna change them. Just want to know i f anyone has dealt with it, how do you manage.
I do wish I can see more of them. The only time I hear from them is if it's initiated by me or if they're talking bad about the other sister.
Holidays, birthdays, graduation, baby shower and other family gatherings I host, they’re not there. My friends didnt even know I had sisters until they saw me at a banquet hall celebrating my grandmothers birthday. These have been friends of over 10 plus years.
They're not active in my life at all. This is the point I make.
Dont wanna change them. Just want to know i f anyone has dealt with it, how do you manage.
Posted by tctaI appreciate this. Man it hurts but I get it.
Dear Poster - it is not going to be what you want it to be so go on with your strong self and be the great person you are no matter what. Give your family love when you can and do not expect it back. Relish it when it does get returned to you. You are one in a large family and you are one in the world of an even larger family. Realize that people are who they are - they can change, but you can not change them. Continue to provide support in being the loving person and role model you are. If you get down on any of them because of what they do that you do not agree on, then there will be consequences. Consider just distancing yourself from that negative behavior and not drawing attention to it. Draw attention instead to the positive behavior. They may want to be like you someday and they may not. They are not going to do what you want them to do because they are already grown. They are who they have become. It is sad if they are not happy and balanced people but unfortunately this world is full of that.
Thing is, the only time I ever get on them is when they do the negative talk about each other. A lot of the things they go thru, I've been there. Hell, they've been there.
Other than that, I like to know what good is going on in their lives, did the kids get good grades? Is the job still going well? You got a new hair color— Let's celebrate!!!
I know they love the feeling of being celebrated and appreciated.
Posted by P-AngelNo. That's why I said I want to cut them out of my life. I don't really want to so I asked how do people deal with them.
Judging from your responses, it appears as though the answer you are looking for is how to change them, so they will align with what you believe and want.
when in reality ... the only person you can adjust is yourself.
Posted by mzmeeYou're new.Posted by P-AngelNo. That's why I said I want to cut them out of my life. I don't really want to so I asked how do people deal with them.
Judging from your responses, it appears as though the answer you are looking for is how to change them, so they will align with what you believe and want.
when in reality ... the only person you can adjust is yourself.click to expand
P angel is the meanest, most bitter poster on
these boards. .. just disregard.
Posted by mzmeeit would take hours to explain how I have managed in my life - I am not close to my family/siblings because my mother was mentally ill growing up and that caused a lot of problems - but I found my family in the friendships I made and kept throughout the years
Ok. I can see that. At that time in my post, I was in my head.
I do wish I can see more of them. The only time I hear from them is if it's initiated by me or if they're talking bad about the other sister.
Holidays, birthdays, graduation, baby shower and other family gatherings I host, they’re not there. My friends didnt even know I had sisters until they saw me at a banquet hall celebrating my grandmothers birthday. These have been friends of over 10 plus years.
They're not active in my life at all. This is the point I make.
Dont wanna change them. Just want to know i f anyone has dealt with it, how do you manage.
Posted by MontgomeryOh okay.Posted by mzmeeYou're new.Posted by P-AngelNo. That's why I said I want to cut them out of my life. I don't really want to so I asked how do people deal with them.
Judging from your responses, it appears as though the answer you are looking for is how to change them, so they will align with what you believe and want.
when in reality ... the only person you can adjust is yourself.
P angel is the meanest, most bitter poster on
these boards. .. just disregard.
click to expand
I thought I was asking for too much.
Everyone has a life. I have a husband and child. I still make time for them. They're my sisters. My blood.
Posted by tctaI just wanna hug you. You can be my friend. Me love you long time.Posted by mzmeeit would take hours to explain how I have managed in my life - I am not close to my family/siblings because my mother was mentally ill growing up and that caused a lot of problems - but I found my family in the friendships I made and kept throughout the years
Ok. I can see that. At that time in my post, I was in my head.
I do wish I can see more of them. The only time I hear from them is if it's initiated by me or if they're talking bad about the other sister.
Holidays, birthdays, graduation, baby shower and other family gatherings I host, they’re not there. My friends didnt even know I had sisters until they saw me at a banquet hall celebrating my grandmothers birthday. These have been friends of over 10 plus years.
They're not active in my life at all. This is the point I make.
Dont wanna change them. Just want to know i f anyone has dealt with it, how do you manage.click to expand
Posted by starwarsI do. I have wonderful sister friends. They share their sisters with me too. I would love for my sisters to be a part of that. I still feel that void tho.
I'm sorry they suck 😢
but thats why friendships exist. hope you find people who appreciate who you are❤
Sometimes Sags are too nice and positive. I personally find it actually difficult to be a whiny bitch. It's unnatural. Therefore, some people think I'm always fine and don't know how to give me support when I need it. On my side, i don't know how to ask for it.
Maybe slow down, think about what kind of relationship you would like with them and figure out a way to gently ask for it.
Maybe slow down, think about what kind of relationship you would like with them and figure out a way to gently ask for it.
Posted by SunMoonStarsWhen I'm positive, I want to share my positivity, when Im on a bad place, I stay away. I hate my negative energy and Im sure not to spread it around.
Sometimes Sags are too nice and positive. I personally find it actually difficult to be a whiny bitch. It's unnatural. Therefore, some people think I'm always fine and don't know how to give me support when I need it. On my side, i don't know how to ask for it.
Maybe slow down, think about what kind of relationship you would like with them and figure out a way to gently ask for it.
My grandmother got on me about this. "It's always good to ask for help, everybody needs somebody". Which is true. Inask for support from my sisters, they just flake on me every time.
I've asked, but it's still the same. I jsut wanted to see their face there. That's all. No additional bells and whistles. Just. Them.
Are you Sag Sun and Moon?
Posted by MontgomeryYes. Scatterbrained if I dont have constructive use of my time. Thank god for my job. Lol
Are you Sag Sun and Moon?
Posted by mzmeeaawww thanks - hugs back ... 🙂Posted by tctaI just wanna hug you. You can be my friend. Me love you long time.Posted by mzmeeit would take hours to explain how I have managed in my life - I am not close to my family/siblings because my mother was mentally ill growing up and that caused a lot of problems - but I found my family in the friendships I made and kept throughout the years
Ok. I can see that. At that time in my post, I was in my head.
I do wish I can see more of them. The only time I hear from them is if it's initiated by me or if they're talking bad about the other sister.
Holidays, birthdays, graduation, baby shower and other family gatherings I host, they’re not there. My friends didnt even know I had sisters until they saw me at a banquet hall celebrating my grandmothers birthday. These have been friends of over 10 plus years.
They're not active in my life at all. This is the point I make.
Dont wanna change them. Just want to know i f anyone has dealt with it, how do you manage.click to expand
Stop comparing your sisterly bonds w anyone else's.
Posted by mzmee
Hi everyone.
I need some help with this, if you guys dont mind.
I'm a sag, the oldest of 7.
I have 3 younger sisters
Virgo
Cancer
Scorpio
I notice more and more they arent very supportive of me. I've fought with and for them. When big things happen (child birth, birthdays, living with me, money issues name it all) I've been very supportive. I dont get that in return. Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
Me, I pretty much keep to myself but will be down for family. As of late, I kept to myself and stay out of the way. When things get rough, I keep to myself. This has been perceived as acting as if I'm perfect, according to my sisters. I don't tell them my business. They talk about each other's business all the time and when I tell them I basically dont want to hear it, I get shut down.
I'm at a point where I really dont want to speak to them again.
Has anyone else dealt with drama from siblings? If so, how did you deal? I love them but I cant take the drama. I also hate that they try to pin me as a goody too shoes when I'm not. I've been thru worse but I just don't tell them. We all go thru things in life, we just have to find our way despite obstacles. I wont talk about them and judge based on how they choose to manuever thur life. I just dont get it.
You're the oldest. No previous experience but the guide. Its tough but the cards have been dealt.
You're probably the example and don't even realize it. In order for them/you all to grow together you have to share and give advice as well as take advice.
Dont detach embrase.
Posted by mzmeeSounds like you are still refusing to accept the reality.
Inask for support from my sisters, they just flake on me every time.
I've asked, but it's still the same. I jsut wanted to see their face there. That's all. No additional bells and whistles. Just. Them.
Here's the realty: your sisters are who they are, and therefore will behave the way they are, regardless, so there's nothing for you to do except change your own perspective.
that's ^^^^^^^^^^ the reality as you described it
now's here you, in your oblivious world: I I just want .. that's all ... just want this .. that's all I ask ... just them, just this, just that .... I want it this way, and if I don't get it, then I'm confused and cannot think of anything else.
Ugh. Glad I never had any sisters.
Posted by DAMEN VILmao
Sag chicks are prone to Schizophrenia so you might just be imagining things..do your sisters tell you that you're crazy sometimes?
Posted by geegeeWhere?Posted by MontgomeryI know where you're going with this
Are you Sag Sun and Moon?click to expand
Her profile started with Gemini... I was mostly
just clarifying.
🙂
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I need some help with this, if you guys dont mind.
I'm a sag, the oldest of 7.
I have 3 younger sisters
Virgo
Cancer
Scorpio
I notice more and more they arent very supportive of me. I've fought with and for them. When big things happen (child birth, birthdays, living with me, money issues name it all) I've been very supportive. I dont get that in return. Virgo is the keeper of drama. She stirs up all the drama and will tell all your business. Scorpio is the manipulator. Cancer plays sides, depending in who she decides to like, I dunno.
Me, I pretty much keep to myself but will be down for family. As of late, I kept to myself and stay out of the way. When things get rough, I keep to myself. This has been perceived as acting as if I'm perfect, according to my sisters. I don't tell them my business. They talk about each other's business all the time and when I tell them I basically dont want to hear it, I get shut down.
I'm at a point where I really dont want to speak to them again.
Has anyone else dealt with drama from siblings? If so, how did you deal? I love them but I cant take the drama. I also hate that they try to pin me as a goody too shoes when I'm not. I've been thru worse but I just don't tell them. We all go thru things in life, we just have to find our way despite obstacles. I wont talk about them and judge based on how they choose to manuever thur life. I just dont get it.