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Oct 08, 2009Comments: 1 · Posts: 6313 · Topics: 313
I got really angry at work tonight but it was the kind of anger that I stew in and makes me neurotic and think about killing groups of people or suicide, actually a huge portion of my shift was spent with me daydreaming about killing everyone with telekinesis or wondering how many people I'd be able to takeout before someone was able to stop me, and I'd plan out escape routes or makeshift weapons.
Anyways I was trying to think my way out of it and I was just going in circles over and over again and then I started trying to be grateful like literally racking my brains for anything I could think of and I found a few that were silly little things at first but by the end of my shift I was Ghandi showing gratitude and I was actually able to start going out of my way and show people kindness. But the feeling that I got from the experience I felt like a woman who had just given birth, you know how they're in bed and theyre sweaty and look like shit but they have a genuine smile when they see their baby for first time.....that was me at the end of my shift fucking Virgin Mary preaching light, love and tranquility, I sobbed and cried a bit but out of happiness but the residual feeling left over was like a dull ache but felt nice, kind of like have a painful knot in your back being massaged out.....totally looking forward to that feeling again.
Pretty powerful shit