what's your biggest

This topic was created in the Miscellaneous forum by virgoOPPP on Sunday, November 5, 2023 and has 36 replies.
most irrational belief (nothing to support it but just you have deep-rooted faith in it?) could be a superstition of some kind too. and how does it affect how you live your life? idk maybe moon/merc/mars might have a say in things too.

like mine is if i stop being thankful for what i have rn then they might be taken away from me.
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars
that's really depressing. never really thought about mine before but guess most women in my family usually gets slapped around by the men guess that might be the curse. not me tho coz i actually chose someone decent. my cousin also married someone pretty decent. prob witnessing violence made me super jittery in dating men who showed even the slightest sign of violence (even in language not just action).
You don't want me to answer this lol
Posted by GoodBunny
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars



that's really depressing. never really thought about mine before but guess most women in my family usually gets slapped around by the men guess that might be the curse. not me tho coz i actually chose someone decent. my cousin also married someone pretty decent. prob witnessing violence made me super jittery in dating men who showed even the slightest sign of violence (even in language not just action).
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My bad. Number 2 is just this weird thought I have, possibly past life trauma. Most likely a self construct.
Number 1 unfortunately has been a pattern since my Great Great Grandmother. It doesnt feel coincidental at this point, it feels like a curse.
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did you not have a child on purpose coz of your deep belief in this? (you don't have to answer if you don't feel comfortable).
Posted by TXCowboy
Good question.
I guess I'm almost irrationally afraid of divorce.
That's about it.
then indirectly might mean also afraid of marriage?
Posted by GoodBunny
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by GoodBunny
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars



that's really depressing. never really thought about mine before but guess most women in my family usually gets slapped around by the men guess that might be the curse. not me tho coz i actually chose someone decent. my cousin also married someone pretty decent. prob witnessing violence made me super jittery in dating men who showed even the slightest sign of violence (even in language not just action).
click to expand


My bad. Number 2 is just this weird thought I have, possibly past life trauma. Most likely a self construct.
Number 1 unfortunately has been a pattern since my Great Great Grandmother. It doesnt feel coincidental at this point, it feels like a curse.



did you not have a child on purpose coz of your deep belief in this? (you don't have to answer if you don't feel comfortable).
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At first no, I didnt notice the pattern. But then one day I was talking to my niece about our family history and it clicked. And I was like wow, I am glad I didnt have kids, and now I dont want to. Let this curse die with me hopefully.
To give you some reference, my great great grandmother died, so my great grandmother helped raise her siblings. Then my grandmother died so my mom helped raise her siblings. Then my mom died, so I had to help raise one of my siblings. Don't get me wrong I don't regret my decision. But I wouldnt want that for my child. I lost part of my youth I can never get back.
Also, I am sorry your family has experienced so much domestic violence.
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as the eldest, i can relate tho I never really tried too hard to mother my siblings.

but now that i'm really thinking about it, maybe naturally superstitions always have to do with our deepest fears. i look at my son and his father and feel an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude. but also disbelief and fear. coz i've known an existence without them and don't really wish to go back.

in you case, do you maybe feel 'saddled' by commitments and therefore usually avoid them like later on as an adult?

tho i also know someone who said he was cursed to be with women who can't give him kids but then he impregnates a single mom and skips out on her 😬😬
Posted by TXCowboy
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by TXCowboy
Good question.
I guess I'm almost irrationally afraid of divorce.
That's about it.



then indirectly might mean also afraid of marriage?
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Yup, most women I've met are shit.
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maybe best to always be careful, never trust too quickly.

i think that's the most i've learned from terrible dates at least.
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.
i believe it. my libra uncle gave my taurus aunt a shut up ring coz he's the type of man who was too busy chasing different women. both miserable and eventually divorced. he still can't stop womanizing and he really should've just remained single tbh, would've spared everyone the bother.
@SassyKiwi also reminds me of this

User Submitted Image

absolute truth coz i've exerted more effort in maintaining a relationship with an ex who ended up cheating on me. but when i became the more willing side to scrap a relationship, I end up married 🤦🤦🤷🤷
Posted by virgoOPPP
@SassyKiwi also reminds me of this



User Submitted Image



absolute truth coz i've exerted more effort in maintaining a relationship with an ex who ended up cheating on me. but when i became the more willing side to scrap a relationship, I end up married 🤦🤦🤷🤷


Girl let me tell you, for the life of me, I DO NOT understand women who exert more effort in a relationship than the men. Maybe I’m too lazy but I see it taken for granted more often than not. I have a friend who used to fix up her boyfriends, got them all tidied up and stylish just for them to go and cheat on her… they would even flaunt HER MONEY as theirs, like wtf?? Of course she suffered from low self-esteem.

Anything that can be thought of can be made/happen.
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.
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What would you tell someone if you read this on here?
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.





What would you tell someone if you read this on here?





Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.



Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.
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For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.







What would you tell someone if you read this on here?







Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.





Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.





For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.





It might depend on family and friends from both sides.
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They aren't the ones in the relationship so fuck their opinion
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.







What would you tell someone if you read this on here?





Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.




Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.





For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.



It might depend on family and friends from both sides.



They aren't the ones in the relationship so fuck their opinion
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Hmm some people are very close to their family who follow traditional values.
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They might wanna think about marrying a cousin or something then lawl
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.







What would you tell someone if you read this on here?





Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.




Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.





For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.



It might depend on family and friends from both sides.



They aren't the ones in the relationship so fuck their opinion
click to expand

Hmm some people are very close to their family who follow traditional values.





They might wanna think about marrying a cousin or something then lawl





Idk people who are close to their family, there's pressure. That doesn't go away in adulthood.
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Nah, I agree, Kaching. It's just that.. it's not good, imo. I've dealt with it all my life, but not something like marriage. Especially a huge decision like marriage, i think no one has a say but the relationship. I resent my mom for so many things she forced on me or made me act certain ways for her reputation etc.
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.







What would you tell someone if you read this on here?





Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.




Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.





For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.



It might depend on family and friends from both sides.



They aren't the ones in the relationship so fuck their opinion
click to expand

Hmm some people are very close to their family who follow traditional values.







They might wanna think about marrying a cousin or something then lawl







Idk people who are close to their family, there's pressure. That doesn't go away in adulthood.





Nah, I agree, Kaching. It's just that.. it's not good, imo. I've dealt with it all my life, but not something like marriage. Especially a huge decision like marriage, i think no one has a say but the relationship. I resent my mom for so many things she forced on me or made me act certain ways for her reputation etc.





Welcome back.



Yeah it's difficult to unlearn and definitely take time to heal from anything that's related to family.
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Blood and proximity are such stupid fucking bonds
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by Solo
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.


What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.







What would you tell someone if you read this on here?





Given that I'm not the one in the r/s, it's hard to say. I haven't been in a situation where I'm with a partner for more than 5 years and you just want to know whether you're long term partners or for marriage. Is it even enough to just be long term if you've considered marriage and claim to love each other.




Personally, if I'm in circles over the same topic for years im calling it quits. I want to know so we both avoid resentment in the future.





For the most part, it's the same thing, long term partners and marriage, no? Idk where I stand entirely on marriage so I guess I can't really say shit.



It might depend on family and friends from both sides.



They aren't the ones in the relationship so fuck their opinion
click to expand

Hmm some people are very close to their family who follow traditional values.









They might wanna think about marrying a cousin or something then lawl









Idk people who are close to their family, there's pressure. That doesn't go away in adulthood.







Nah, I agree, Kaching. It's just that.. it's not good, imo. I've dealt with it all my life, but not something like marriage. Especially a huge decision like marriage, i think no one has a say but the relationship. I resent my mom for so many things she forced on me or made me act certain ways for her reputation etc.







Welcome back.





Yeah it's difficult to unlearn and definitely take time to heal from anything that's related to family.





Blood and proximity are such stupid fucking bonds





Bonds nonetheless



It can be damaging for sure.
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The Unfortunate Endgame
Posted by GoodBunny
Posted by IceStorm
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars



Those are both really sad and dark 😩😩🥺

My maternal grandma died when my mom was only 17, then my mom died when I was 29. I’ve never had the belief that I’ll die young but since my 9 year old son knows that my mom passed away, he is convinced that I will pass away too and he talks/worries about it often, which breaks my heart that he thinks about those things at his young age.

Ironically I don’t think much about death.. nor have I prepared for it. Maybe it’s because of my 12th house stellium (I keep those things hidden, out of sight out of mind)



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I know it sounds fucked, but I actually am just very matter of fact about things. Like okay this is happening, what am I doing about it? How can I move forward with this knowledge? I have a 6th house stellium and a Virgo moon so I think through my emotions. 😬 I know number 2 is probably irrational. I cant reason away the pattern for number 1.
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same for me maybe why sometimes people think i'm cold (virgo sun/merc/rising).

my guy's a pisces sun/merc/mars and always tells me I'm a super crybaby which I really am in comparison to him. tho I'm always scrambling for a solution throughout all my sulking. you can't ever just sit and do nothing especially as a mom.
Posted by Lorelai
I believe Capricorn men are prettier than most women. I can't explain any further.
tbh almost every time i see a guy that i think looks super hot, it always turns out to be a capricorn man. too bad their personalities don't really fit their looks 🤷🤷
Posted by dragonh0rsecvck
most of my beliefs are supported by some anecdotal evidence, however flimsy
But I believe along with the accepted planet/house placements, our degrees add another layer of flavor (cycling through the 12 signs) and our draconic charts matter. I'm finding Vedic to be more and more feasible as well... just can't shake the fact that I can accurately guess people's tropical luminaries. but if someone seems shit for their sign, often checking their Draconic chart tells a lot of the story
also, I think the Greco-Roman rulers of each day of the week add another flavor to your personality. I was born on a Saturday, as have many people who died young, committed suicide, suffered misfortune, or were thrown into disrepute somehow. Sunday= arrogant and abusive assholes (they can also be great), Wednesday= super artistic, "loyal but not faithful", mad geniuses, gossipy, Mercurial. Monday= empathetic, commits suicide the second most. Tuesday= Arian bold hoishness. Thursday= funny, jovial, Jupiter-like. Friday= jealous/overprotective of Queen Bee status, does witchcraft, good partners.
I also looked into synastry between "days of the week" and Sunday-Tuesday seems to go nuclear as well as Sunday-Saturday obviously. Monday-Saturday seems strong and natural. Monday-Thursday is kind of a thing.. Sunday-Sunday works, they protect their own.
I was born on a Tuesday. Do you see that in me?
Posted by IceStorm
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars


Those are both really sad and dark 😩😩🥺
My maternal grandma died when my mom was only 17, then my mom died when I was 29. I’ve never had the belief that I’ll die young but since my 9 year old son knows that my mom passed away, he is convinced that I will pass away too and he talks/worries about it often, which breaks my heart that he thinks about those things at his young age.
Ironically I don’t think much about death.. nor have I prepared for it. Maybe it’s because of my 12th house stellium (I keep those things hidden, out of sight out of mind)


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I definitely see that 12th house stellium in you. You be holdin back from the truth about certain things..
Posted by dragonh0rsecvck
Posted by route666aybb
Posted by dragonh0rsecvck
most of my beliefs are supported by some anecdotal evidence, however flimsy
But I believe along with the accepted planet/house placements, our degrees add another layer of flavor (cycling through the 12 signs) and our draconic charts matter. I'm finding Vedic to be more and more feasible as well... just can't shake the fact that I can accurately guess people's tropical luminaries. but if someone seems shit for their sign, often checking their Draconic chart tells a lot of the story
also, I think the Greco-Roman rulers of each day of the week add another flavor to your personality. I was born on a Saturday, as have many people who died young, committed suicide, suffered misfortune, or were thrown into disrepute somehow. Sunday= arrogant and abusive assholes (they can also be great), Wednesday= super artistic, "loyal but not faithful", mad geniuses, gossipy, Mercurial. Monday= empathetic, commits suicide the second most. Tuesday= Arian bold hoishness. Thursday= funny, jovial, Jupiter-like. Friday= jealous/overprotective of Queen Bee status, does witchcraft, good partners.
I also looked into synastry between "days of the week" and Sunday-Tuesday seems to go nuclear as well as Sunday-Saturday obviously. Monday-Saturday seems strong and natural. Monday-Thursday is kind of a thing.. Sunday-Sunday works, they protect their own.


I was born on a Tuesday. Do you see that in me?





Yeah
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Alright just making sure
Posted by Lorelai
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by Lorelai
I believe Capricorn men are prettier than most women. I can't explain any further.


tbh almost every time i see a guy that i think looks super hot, it always turns out to be a capricorn man. too bad their personalities don't really fit their looks 🤷🤷





Too bad their hairline will betray them sooner or later lol 😭
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😆😆
That if I have a thought about needing to go down a certain side street or route home and If I don't, something bad will happen. I always have to fight it and go the way that I think something bad will happen. It's like a thought that pops into my head if I'm doing something risky like jumping over a creek on a hike, It's all about to go wrong and I'll roll my ankle or something. I literally tell myself outload "NO" I'm telling my brain not to have those intrusive negative thoughts.
Posted by dragonh0rsecvck
most of my beliefs are supported by some anecdotal evidence, however flimsy
But I believe along with the accepted planet/house placements, our degrees add another layer of flavor (cycling through the 12 signs) and our draconic charts matter. I'm finding Vedic to be more and more feasible as well... just can't shake the fact that I can accurately guess people's tropical luminaries. but if someone seems shit for their sign, often checking their Draconic chart tells a lot of the story
also, I think the Greco-Roman rulers of each day of the week add another flavor to your personality. I was born on a Saturday, as have many people who died young, committed suicide, suffered misfortune, or were thrown into disrepute somehow. Sunday= arrogant and abusive assholes (they can also be great), Wednesday= super artistic, "loyal but not faithful", mad geniuses, gossipy, Mercurial. Monday= empathetic, commits suicide the second most. Tuesday= Arian bold hoishness. Thursday= funny, jovial, Jupiter-like. Friday= jealous/overprotective of Queen Bee status, does witchcraft, good partners.
I also looked into synastry between "days of the week" and Sunday-Tuesday seems to go nuclear as well as Sunday-Saturday obviously. Monday-Saturday seems strong and natural. Monday-Thursday is kind of a thing.. Sunday-Sunday works, they protect their own.
based on this belief, does that mean that there are certain days that even tho you might feel like doing something that you simply don't go through with it in the end coz you associate some negativity with that day?

sometimes i feel when i don't have energy for some reason that it must not be a good day to do anything too important. those days are random for me personally tho.
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by Lorelai
I believe Capricorn men are prettier than most women. I can't explain any further.


tbh almost every time i see a guy that i think looks super hot, it always turns out to be a capricorn man. too bad their personalities don't really fit their looks 🤷🤷
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Angry
Posted by IceStorm
Posted by route666aybb
Posted by IceStorm
Posted by GoodBunny
I have two.
1. I believe there is a generational curse that causes some women to die young in my family and leave their daughters to raise their siblings. Without going into detail, I feel like I was next in line. I'm glad I didnt have kids, but I am still unsure if I will live to see retirement. 😬 Hopefully not having kids breaks the curse.
2. That I will only meet my"soulmate" right before I die. Thus, when I meet the one, it might mean death is near. 😭
Virgo moon, aquarius mercury, libra mars


Those are both really sad and dark 😩😩🥺
My maternal grandma died when my mom was only 17, then my mom died when I was 29. I’ve never had the belief that I’ll die young but since my 9 year old son knows that my mom passed away, he is convinced that I will pass away too and he talks/worries about it often, which breaks my heart that he thinks about those things at his young age.
Ironically I don’t think much about death.. nor have I prepared for it. Maybe it’s because of my 12th house stellium (I keep those things hidden, out of sight out of mind)







I definitely see that 12th house stellium in you. You be holdin back from the truth about certain things..





Like what? Give me some examples of what truths I hold back?



Her comment was about death, and the 12th house is about spirituality/what is hidden.. and I have Jupiter, Venus AND Saturn in my 12th house. So my only point was that with 12th house stellium, thoughts of death or dying is a big part of my subconscious but I don’t talk about it openly.
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You said things, didn't say other things, and now I realize you're talking about it. I mentioned it because of your "venus in the 12th house" vibes, which I just learned about. It's like a hidden part, and you're holding back your feelings for people, just like I do with my Mars in the 12th house.
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.





What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.
click to expand


So many factors. Depends on his age and maturity. His experience of his parents’ relationship. But ultimately it will end in what you’re willing to put up with. What’s his end goal in being in a relationship, whether with you or the next person? To pass time? To consider the person as a future life partner? If you’ve always desired marriage as an end goal, you need to make that clear to him but in an open ended way that doesn’t put a spotlight specifically on him. Something like, “I’m just at that point in life where I only want to continue dating if the person is serious about settling down soon.” If that brings up questions from him about your timeline with examples like within the next couple of years, etc that’s great, you can ask about his if he has any.

I know you brought up traditional values in some posts and I personally couldn’t continue to dedicate my time to someone who’s not sure about what they want out of a relationship especially in their 30s or older regardless of what kind of trauma they’ve experienced. You can attempt to guide him to self-realizations if you think he’s worth the investment.

A long term relationship with or without marriage is obviously never guaranteed. I just think most people like the concept of marriage because it feels good knowing you’re both risking a lot legally (joint finances and assets, etc). Just gives it that extra serious overlay in a relationship.

Btw I would consider my husband being emotionally inept and awkward but what I really about liked him was he was very serious about the prospect of marriage, no tomfoolery!
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.







What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.



So many factors. Depends on his age and maturity. His experience of his parents’ relationship. But ultimately it will end in what you’re willing to put up with. What’s his end goal in being in a relationship, whether with you or the next person? To pass time? To consider the person as a future life partner? If you’ve always desired marriage as an end goal, you need to make that clear to him but in an open ended way that doesn’t put a spotlight specifically on him. Something like, “I’m just at that point in life where I only want to continue dating if the person is serious about settling down soon.” If that brings up questions from him about your timeline with examples like within the next couple of years, etc that’s great, you can ask about his if he has any.




I know you brought up traditional values in some posts and I personally couldn’t continue to dedicate my time to someone who’s not sure about what they want out of a relationship especially in their 30s or older regardless of what kind of trauma they’ve experienced. You can attempt to guide him to self-realizations if you think he’s worth the investment.




A long term relationship with or without marriage is obviously never guaranteed. I just think most people like the concept of marriage because it feels good knowing you’re both risking a lot legally (joint finances and assets, etc). Just gives it that extra serious overlay in a relationship.




Btw I would consider my husband being emotionally inept and awkward but what I really about liked him was he was very serious about the prospect of marriage, no tomfoolery!





It's a friend, not me. That's why in one of the post I said, idk what to say. I haven't been in that situation.



Is it possible that I can be that complicated for people coming from traditional families? Having your family still have that hold on you, regardless of how successful you are in other areas of your life. Or is it hesitation? He waited for a good opportunity to bring it up to his family that he was dating my friend, after 5 years. And I mean, he waited until he had a medical emergency.
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He hid the fact he was dating your friend from his family for 5 years?!
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Posted by Kachi
Posted by SassyKiwi
Idk how irrational it sounds but I am very convinced that unless a man is extremely eager to marry you on his own (he doesn’t feel pressured), he won’t really be a good husband.









What if it's someone who just doesn't know how to take the initiative in a r/s, super busy and emotionally inept but shows he loves you through acts of service.




So many factors. Depends on his age and maturity. His experience of his parents’ relationship. But ultimately it will end in what you’re willing to put up with. What’s his end goal in being in a relationship, whether with you or the next person? To pass time? To consider the person as a future life partner? If you’ve always desired marriage as an end goal, you need to make that clear to him but in an open ended way that doesn’t put a spotlight specifically on him. Something like, “I’m just at that point in life where I only want to continue dating if the person is serious about settling down soon.” If that brings up questions from him about your timeline with examples like within the next couple of years, etc that’s great, you can ask about his if he has any.






I know you brought up traditional values in some posts and I personally couldn’t continue to dedicate my time to someone who’s not sure about what they want out of a relationship especially in their 30s or older regardless of what kind of trauma they’ve experienced. You can attempt to guide him to self-realizations if you think he’s worth the investment.






A long term relationship with or without marriage is obviously never guaranteed. I just think most people like the concept of marriage because it feels good knowing you’re both risking a lot legally (joint finances and assets, etc). Just gives it that extra serious overlay in a relationship.






Btw I would consider my husband being emotionally inept and awkward but what I really about liked him was he was very serious about the prospect of marriage, no tomfoolery!







It's a friend, not me. That's why in one of the post I said, idk what to say. I haven't been in that situation.





Is it possible that I can be that complicated for people coming from traditional families? Having your family still have that hold on you, regardless of how successful you are in other areas of your life. Or is it hesitation? He waited for a good opportunity to bring it up to his family that he was dating my friend, after 5 years. And I mean, he waited until he had a medical emergency.



He hid the fact he was dating your friend from his family for 5 years?!





Different cultures, one being traditional
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I get it, I can be kinda too traditional for someone in my generation. How did his family react? And yeah some people really don’t want to disappoint their families but also believe in living their personal lives however they want. I guess it just boils down to how understanding your friend wants to be about the situation. If she’s content with their arrangement that’s all that matters.
Posted by StubbornSag
- Of getting old alone - not having anyone close (not having my s/o or children - that I'm terrified of birthing anyway)🤦🏼‍♀️😂 and also even if I had children I would still be afraid I'd be left alone.
- Not having enough income to support myself
- I'm terrified of cancer and any kind of disability - loosing sight, hearing or limbs or their function...
- Giving a birth, having a child with special needs...
Those are all things I'm terrified of...
damn yeah when i first felt contractions until our drive home, i could not sleep coz i was told they were unsure about my son's hearing and also i didn't wanna miss anything by being asleep (3 days no sleep).

but i was already preparing mentally for all the things we have to learn in order to communicate with him and help him communicate. tho thankfully we came back after a month and found there's absolutely nothing wrong after all.
I have Capricorn in Uranus in the 5th House.

Apparently, this means I'm cursed to not have children or get married.

There might be some truth to this 😂😂

Sorry mom, should've had me an hour earlier.
Posted by StubbornSag
Posted by virgoOPPP
Posted by StubbornSag
- Of getting old alone - not having anyone close (not having my s/o or children - that I'm terrified of birthing anyway)🤦🏼‍♀️😂 and also even if I had children I would still be afraid I'd be left alone.
- Not having enough income to support myself
- I'm terrified of cancer and any kind of disability - loosing sight, hearing or limbs or their function...
- Giving a birth, having a child with special needs...
Those are all things I'm terrified of...





damn yeah when i first felt contractions until our drive home, i could not sleep coz i was told they were unsure about my son's hearing and also i didn't wanna miss anything by being asleep (3 days no sleep).




but i was already preparing mentally for all the things we have to learn in order to communicate with him and help him communicate. tho thankfully we came back after a month and found there's absolutely nothing wrong after all.





Damn that was really bad to have to go through 😐 my Virgo bff almost lost her baby during pandemic, birth was too premature and she didn't see her for over a month due to restrictions 😐 luckily baby survived and is doing fine with just minor issues. Supposed to be Aqua but ended up being Sag...that much premature😐 another friend was told her baby is most likely having down syndrome...and it turned out he was just fine. Idk how can they seriously give such diagnosis based on nothing. Baby does have a slightly down syndrome looking face but it's not unusual cause she has such face too and neither has the syndrome actually!
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thankfully everything turned out okay and shes doing well with her baby ☺️☺️ i've met some real crap doctors with superiority complex that told me: "oh you found out you're pregnant so late and probably didn't drink the vitamins so your baby's malnourished."

good thing i did eventually encounter a more optimistic doctor and things turned out well and jokes on that previous doctor coz my baby is now a chonky boi who resembles Winston Churchill.
I see life in a different way then most. I take a look at the planets in our solar system and see something like Jupiter, which is literally an unfathomable ball of raging elements that just exists, and does it's thing while we doom scroll social media. Then I think of life, and how I truly think it's special. Imagine random elements of the universe combining in a way that makes them actually become animated, thus becoming life. Everything around us is just crazy elements that have combined to be what they are, but by doing that they create another element here on earth called life. And people like me can actually acknowledge that. We can observe the universe, which actually makes us feel sad and alone. Like we are the only things that are truly alive and can view the universe. Though we are literally made from the same elements everything else is made from. We just had the ability to becom animated, which is brilliant imo. The idea a bunch of inanimate elements can be combined in the most specific way, that they actually become animated and start not only existing in the universe, but also have the ability to view it and at the very least, can make a primitive understanding of it.