Ok, Gemini male really into female Pisces Pt. II

This topic was created in the Pisces forum by Judicious on Monday, November 29, 2010 and has 11 replies.
Now 90% shorter!
To summarize as quickly and as detailed as I can
3 weeks ago - returns concert ticket I gave her, practically tells me to move on, so I decide I am going to.
That Friday night I go out to a club and I'm on the dance floor dancing with a girl, when I look over my shoulder my little fishie is a foot behind me acting like she can't see me. I kind of start dancing a little more seductively with the girl I'm with and I see my fishie walk away towards the bar looking like she is ready to cry. I go after her and say hey. We talk occasionally all night but is obvious we're both holding back. I leave without saying anything to her (something I never do) and she texted me an hour and a half after bar close saying she was sorry if the night was awkward.
the next night I text her and she starts texting me that she is confused about her and me. I tell her I've been confused since the day I met her and she replied "as have I". She keeps saying she is just confused, etc etc.
Next night I get week and send her an emotionally charged text, she tells me I need to stop this. I tell her to cut me loose then. She says fine, that I was hanging on for no reason. I got upset and told her next time to not be so obvious creeping behind my back at the club. She obviously got upset, told me she wasn't interested and that I was just mad my feelings were hurt, etc. I asked her about the previous night's conversation about her being confused, and she claimed she was drunk and what she was trying to say was that she was confused as to why I kept texting her when she wasn't interested.
ouch
I text her back telling her I'm sorry I misunderstood, and that I wouldn't be an issue any longer.
two weeks later, Wednesday before Thanksgiving, I'm at a bar with my friend and his sister and his sister looks so much like her I just can't help but think about her strongly, and get kind of sad that she wants nothing to do with me. At this point I had her number deleted off my phone to prevent myself from caving in. At around midnight I get a call from her area code, and I only know like 2 people with that area code. I text asking who this is since I don't recognize the number, and she texts me back saying "I'm sorry, idk, who is this"
so she calls me, and then claims she doesn't know who I am just because I had said I didn't know who she was...even though she was calling ME. She asks me who I am and I tell her "you called me, you tell me".
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She verifies my suspicions and aks me who I am. I just ignore it. The next day I text her a happy thanksgiving and we have some light chatting. Eventually I ask her why she called me at midnight and she claimed it was accidental, and she didn't know how since she had deleted my number and the text log...likely story. I tell her "well maybe you should keep it this time, everything happens for a reason"
Sunday I am at church and I pray to God to bring me some resolution with this girl. AFter church I perform a song for the kids in the church. I then go home and check my phone and I see I have another missed call from her, one I got while I was performing. This time there was a 31 second voicemail.
I call her back and leave her a voicemail saying I was returning her call. She texts me about an hour later saying "Sorry I called, it was an accident, I'm so sorry, I'm locking my phone it won't happen again"
I keep it light and reply with "Your phone obviously wants to talk to me, I don't mind"
she replies with a "ha ha, yeah sorry, won't happen again"
I reply with "I want it to happen again, every day if I were lucky"
knowing her I didn't expect a response, and I still haven't gotten one, but she is one to stall a lot.
Last night I inspected the voicemail which originally sounded like just white noise, but I listened carefully and picked up a few things
someone says "I don't think he's up, something something voicemail", then something mumbled that I can't understand, then towards the end of the voicemail I hear another voice say "Press redial" and a voice that sounds like my fishie say "Noooo".
Now, if I interpret that voicemail the way it SEEMS then her story about accidentally calling me is a blatant lie, and she was actively trying to reach me, while discussing me with someone else. Maybe wishful thinking on my part? But I was out of her life and she came back with those "accidental" phone calls.
so what do you guys think?
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"I'm on the dance floor dancing with a girl, when I look over my shoulder my little fishie is a foot behind me acting like she can't see me. I kind of start dancing a little more seductively with the girl I'm with and I see my fishie walk away towards the bar looking like she is ready to cry. I go after her ...."

That's as far as I got in reading this.
You two are trying to play for attention, rather than have a mature relationship where attention is genuine .... you play with feelings, you get burnt ... end of story.
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I'm not trying to play anything. She told me 5 days beforehand to move on, and I was doing just that, moving on. I even messaged you after she told me to move on. I don't want to play these games, but any time I'm direct with my feelings she runs away. I didn't ask her to show up a foot behind me while I'm dancing with another girl. But how am I supposed to react in that situation? Here is a girl who just 5 days ago told me to move on, and suddenly here she is a foot behind me while she sees me with another girl. I was hurt. Yeah maybe I turned on the theatrics to get her jealous, but as I said before, this same girl practically told me to eff off. What am I supposed to do? Seriously? I want nothing more than a mature, adult relationship, but how am I supposed to do that when she resorts to sneaky techniques to get my attention in some sort of attempt to not put herself out there. These are legitimate questions. I'm 22 so maybe my immature pride plays a factor in this, but when I'm told to move on and I do just that, only for her to come back in such a sneaky way, how do I handle that situation? I don't want to play these petty games, but they seem to be the only way she operates. If it were one isolated incident I understand, but she does these things all the time instead of just being straightforward with me.
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Posted by Judicious
I'm not trying to play anything.




Bullshit, of course you are. What point is there in lying to me (us) ... do you think lying to us saves yourself from relationship problems?

Posted by Judicious
... I turned on the theatrics to get her jealous ..



Of course you tried to make her jealous, because you two are playing with each others feelings. How can you possibly say you aren't out of one side of your mouth and then out of the other say you try to make her jealous?

Posted by Judicious
What am I supposed to do?

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Act like a 22-year-old, instead of a high-schooler. Every time you respond back to her trying to fuck with your feelings in the same fashion (head-gaming) .. that makes you just as guilty and it proves you want to play her rather than have a real adult relationship.
You are suppose to walk away and go find someone of value to you, which she apparantly isn't.
People have a feeling of fondness and/or love and push forward all their love for a person to whom they want to express this feeling, even if this person isn't worth it ... it blinds you. You think you are trying to love a person when in reality, you are merely trying to love the feeling of love, and trying to place it on someone to share with you.
It's not HER you want .. it's the feeling. Because if you two really loved each other for REAL then you wouldn't fuck with each others feelings for gain of attention.
What are you suppose to do? Walk away and wait for a person to whom actually loves you.
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Judicious-
If I were you I'd do just as P-Angel says and it isn't often I agree completely with her. However, in this situation I think you're falling prey to the chase and capture rather than actual feelings for the person. It will never end well. If I were you I'd find someone to tickle your fancy quickly and distract you from this vicious cycle.
I'm sorry this one didn't end well, but if you can learn from it, it wasn't in vain.
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Posted by Judicious
I don't want to play these petty games, but they seem to be the only way she operates. If it were one isolated incident I understand, but she does these things all the time instead of just being straightforward with me.




Bullshit that you don't want to play these petty games .... you try to make her jealous, you run after her when she sulks away .... don't even try to play me.
You know .... people actually know how to put two and two together .. jsut because you lie to yourself doesn't mean we are fool enough to believe it.
You want her to change, that is why you continue to play with her. Because you have a feeling you wnat to express and you have chosen her to be the reciever so now you have to mold her to be what you want.

What you want ..... what.
What
You want her to be ((((((what))))) you want, not who.

You're not alone, look around you just in dxp .... everywhere you find people desperately seeking help in trying to find out how to make a person WHAT they want.
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This isn't a situation where a girl is playing the chase and I'm falling a fool to it. I don't love the IDEA of her, I love HER. You think this is the first time a girl has tried cat and mouse with me? Maybe I'm alone in this, but I'm the type of person that follows my gut, and my intution, and from the moment I met this girl something in my body clicked and ever since then she is the one my heart is fond of. High school games? You might be shocked to find out that these games are a very common occurrence in courting these days. You're 100% right, I shouldn't have played the games back. I am guilty of that. But excuse me for being hurt and trying to make her jealous, you say its a high school game yet I am completely confident these things occur even at your age level. This isn't my first run around the park, which is why I know this girl is different. I have 3-4 other girls right now that with a dial would fill in all of those requirements you say I am looking for, yet I have no interest in them, and many of them play the same cat and mouse games. These games are not malicious, they are to protect ones ego. Now we're going to act like courting isn't a game that's been occurring for thousands of years?
Is she playing games? Yes. Have I played games back? Yes. But please don't undermine what I know I feel by telling me I don't like her but what she represents. The feeling of comfort and completeness I felt within minutes of meeting her is a feeling I never felt with my own ex-girlfriend or numerous other girls I've been with. There are too many factors at play here to discredit it completely as two kids playing games and nothing more. I saw long-term with her before there was even a chase. I think I'd be playing a bigger game by ignoring what I feel in my gut and the signs from life I've gotten about this girl. I don't like what she represents, I like HER, her essence, her name, what she stands for, her goals in life, etc.
So just because she is playing games (which all girls I interact with do by the way) I should ignore my intuition and move on instead of giving it my all to explore what is here? I think you have a very skewed idea of how 22 year olds court if you consider these "high school" games. Maybe the chase has made me value her more, its human nature to value something when we have to work harder for it. What I'm not going to deny is that this girl had an effect on me that hundreds of other girls I've seen, interacted with, and got to know
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Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Judicious-
If I were you I'd do just as P-Angel says and it isn't often I agree completely with her. However, in this situation I think you're falling prey to the chase and capture rather than actual feelings for the person. It will never end well. If I were you I'd find someone to tickle your fancy quickly and distract you from this vicious cycle.
I'm sorry this one didn't end well, but if you can learn from it, it wasn't in vain.


I've done that only to feel empty afterwards. I'm getting more female attention than I've gotten in my entire life and I don't want it. I slept with two girls I thought I had feelings for only to think about her immediately afterwards. There is something there, and I'm going to explore it. If I crash and burn then so be it, but I'm not going to live my life full of regret wondering "what if". If you are right and she's not for me then so be it, I just find it a bit weird how quickly people on an astrology forum are to discredit genuine human emotion and intuition. If you're right It'll suck for some time, but I would have learned from the experience and leave out of it a more well-rounded person and I'll probably be the first to admit I was wrong and laugh it off. But to come here and call me delusional for feeling what I'm feeling? I can't accept that, sorry.
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Instead of even trying to listen to any reason .... you should probably make more threads about this, so you can get the pity you seek ... because thus far, between both threads you've gotten basically the same answer, verbalized differently, of course .....
.... and still choose to make excuses so you can continue to be a fool ..

so be it .... I'm done with you then, if you refuse to hear anything except yourself.
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My question is what did you do that made her return her concert ticket? While that may seem like it came out of no where to you if was justified in her mind.
As a pisces female myself we are probably better than the FBI at finding things out. So I feel like in reading this situation she found something or saw something that has caused her to try and shut you out (even though that doesn't seem to be what she wants since she won't leave you alone and keeps trying to get a reaction from you). We don't always use the best tactics at finding things out so sometimes it hard to admit why we are actually mad because then that would also require us to admit how we found that information out.
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