Piscean male who swims back and forth.

This topic was created in the Pisces forum by savagetai on Wednesday, September 7, 2005 and has 20 replies.
Hi all... I am having problems with a Piscean male. I am a female capricorn by the way. He broke up with me at the peak of the relationship because he's afraid of getting hurt like in his last relationship. After breaking up with me.. he starts pressing me to not hate him and wants to try to salvage a friendship from all this and see where it goes. He starts calling, emailing.. doing stupid things just to see me. All I do, is try to stay away because I really do love him and can't bear the overwhelming emotions I have towards him. I told him that I was contemplating cutting him from ever contacting me but it was hard for me and him as well because he keeps on saying He doesn't want to lose me completely. He gives me mixed signals all the time.. telling me how much he cares for me, MORE than a friend and can't stand the thought of me with another guy. Anyways, I give in (again).. pull down my pride and said, sure.. lets give friendship a try, even though its tough. (everytime I tell him it's hard to be friends, he will tell me to work with him to make it better.) But instead.. I get a THREE line email.. saying "I'm comfortable being friends, I've moved on with my life, Please do the same" An EMAIL!!! After all I have been through.. let him be in control and do what he wants... he has the audacity to write an email rather than talking on the phone or seeing me face to face???
I am so mad at him... and I have done NOTHING to warrant this.. I have been nothing but the greatest gf to him and he admits it. I have decided not to email the idiot.. and i can't help but pray that he does come and say hi! I don't know what to do... he adored me so much when we were together.. more than you will ever know! And now this????
UGH!
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Sounds like a familiar story (not mine).
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Whose story? I've lost him now.. and it's not because I did anything to hurt him either!!! Can anyone relate and sigh... tell me what they think?
Right now.. he's an a $ $ ....
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LOL that was your story. I've just noticed it when I've looked back in the topics.
Honestly I don't know what to say. He seems to be an unreliable person in my eyes. Keep us posted with anything new. It's interesting to know how this will end up.
Good luck.
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LoL. Thanks Haffo.
Do any other Piscean males have anything to say about this??
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Sorry to hear of your pain savagetai...you hurt because you have no understanding of his actions. Honestly, we truly cannot know why someone does what they do, they are not us and they will not choose to act the way we "think" is right. For him, he did what felt good to him.
I have a Pisces male friend and we talk a lot about relationships and life. He has been married twice before and both of his wives left him. He is still friends with them both. He has expressed many times to me that he does not like conflict - he prefers peace. He understands that not all relationships are meant to be but...friendships are our choice. Friendship is very important to him, feelings of others are important to him - he wants everybody to like him and if he ever feels that someone does not - whao....sends him into a tailspin!!!!! So, he chooses to not upset the applecart but to instead swim away in a nice easy simple fashion.
I hope some of this Pisces' thoughts have helped - then again, who really knows how your Pisces guy thinks...he is after all in his own pond.
So, you have learned a bit about his character. Does it work for you? Does he inhance your already great nature? Do you feel good when you are with him? If the answer is yes, cool. If not, time to move on and find that relationship that works for you and makes your already beautiful light shine even brighter!
Best wishes,
FBird
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I just realized I made a mistake on my post!
"But instead.. I get a THREE line email.. saying "I'm comfortable being friends, I've moved on with my life, Please do the same" An EMAIL!!! After all I have been through.. let him be in control and do what he wants... he has the audacity to write an email rather than talking on the phone or seeing me face to face???"
He said " I am UNCOMFORTABLE being friends, I've moved on with my life, Please do the same".
Tactful? No... Assholish? Yes.....
I've just seen his nature of being completely and utterly nice and then switching it to the other extreme in an instant. All this while, I have not done anything to jolt or provoke him. All this occurred... through his own doing!!!!!
Thanks Fbird for your thoughts.. I just can't believe that someone who said they cared so so much for me, would turn off and go the other direction with no thought and consideration to me. I hope one day he'll realize his mistake ... either that.. or let karma kick him in the a $ $ !
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Ah...makes sense - I see your frustration and confusion - gotta say I'd be feeling the same way my dear. I do not know if this is the case or not but what I have realized is, men like to have the upper hand (control) when ending a relationship - they do NOT like to be REJECTED or have the woman end the relationship. This is their Ego at work sweetie it is not about you...try not to take this as a personal attack against you. It is all about him and preserving his ego.
My advice to woman is....when ya know it isn't working - find your inner strength and get out...YOU make the decision, do not wait for the man to end or wait for him to "change" his mind. We truly know in our heart when something is good or bad for us.
Again, I am sorry for your situation - wishing you much peace.
Freebird
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Yeah.. I am just mad at him. I definitely deserve more respect than that. It's cruel I know.. and I am not known to wish illwill upon ANYONE... but man, I hope he chokes on vomit. This is what happens when you manipulate my heart for two months...
Grrr.....
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Yes, absolutely YOU deserve more respect that what he gave you....so, now next time you are with someone and they are not respecting you - you will have some choices to make. You now know the signs and this is GOOD! AlWAYS and I mean ALWAYS honour yourself and do not ever settle for anything less! You deserve the best and that is what you shall have smile
You go girl!
Freebird flapping and a flying for savagetai!
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Wow.. I have never been so manipulated in my life. Found out that when the ass sent me that rude email... he's been seeing some rocker chick.
I have never felt so played.... never been a string along like this. I have been nothing but honest, and kind... and respectful... and this is what I get???
How much more hurt can I endure? really? Being a capricorn... I did give my heart whole-heartedly. Can't believe i was just PLAYED.
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That why I demand a reassurance in every step savagetai. You can't just sit guess the behaviours of people. If something is going to happen, then the best shot is to prevent it before happens. The more you let it progress without your knowledge more hurt you will become.
Isn't reassurance method is effective? Am I too demanding now? Maybe. But is it good for me? YES!
At least it's over now savagetai. Now your mind is free of guessing game.
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I have always asked for the truth and i have always been honest myself. i demanded it from him.. I did.
But instead i got played. Bah
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If someone have agreed to be friend to you and still is not answering your questions, this is time when you have to move on. Sharing the thoughts is actually what the friendhsip means. If he's silent and want to be a friend to you, leave him. Those both behaviours cannot get along. A person cannot be a friend and silent to you at the same time. The friendship itself means to respect each other. Silence is sign of respectless person. Watch it.
After all, what is the difference between silent man and any man in the street?
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My first step to actually gaining myself was emailing him today a reply to his nasty email. After letting him string me along for the last little while.... and letting him say everything and anything to be the one in control, I replied to him with
"I am glad you brought it up because I see no reason for us to stay in touch. Take care"
That was such a hard thing to do.. especially when I still care for this manipulative jerk in some ways. In the future, it would be nice to cross paths again... but him being a typical pisces.. I am not too sure if he will. Unless he did care for me as much as he said he did.
Blah........-
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savagetai:
I hope you are feeling a bit better now thats all over.I think what he did to you was unforgivable. Nobody should have to go through that sort of pain and uncertainty.I think you did the right thing in totally cutting him off.You deserve a lot better.The best way to deal with a pisces that runs hot and cold every few seconds is to ignore them.They should learn it's not alright to play with other people's emotions and grow up...start learning to focus that famous empathy they are renowned for outward instead of inward.
Take care.

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hanks Melusine. It was so hard but I had to.
I bumped into him just now actually. Kept my head up high, didn't look over and just walked on. Didn't even care if he noticed me or not. Then I went for a walk during lunch and saw him in the distance AGAIN... i just turned to another direction. I hate having this feeling of being angry at him, sad, and a little bit of longing (not as much though!) for him. Ugh.
I followed the advice of just ignoring him... not giving him a second look. Sigh.. we work close by so for me to NOT bump into him is almost impossible. Sad
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I know I shouldn't doubt myself or anything... but sometimes I wonder if I did anything wrong to provoke this kind of reaction from him. If I did, I would hope he would confront me about it since I am a confrontational person who likes to make things right especially if the other person is worth it. Another thing is that he always puts a smile on his face and is always apparently happy.. yet when I was with him, he seems to be SUCH a depressed soul... a temper, low self-esteem, complains and whines alot, and judgemental! So when I see that he's all happy happy joy joy, I feel like I may have made him miserable but I don't think I did because I am a very happy person and i did my best to make HIM happy as well!
man... pisces men confuse me....
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Hi savagetai,
It's okay to be confused.I, myself am often very confused by the behavior of men specially in a relationship situation(never dated a pisces though).You know we pisces can be a bit deceptive sometimes when it comes to our emotions. We learn at a young age not to wear our hearts on our sleeves, otherwise poeple tend to tread on them. As far as your pisces goes I think all his recent happiness and laughter might be a front for some emotion he's trying to hide.So what you see on the outside might not truly reflect what's on the inside. You gave your best in that relationship and it was he who ran away.Let him realize his mistake and come back to you.
Take care.
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Thanks Melusine... I am an expressive person and when my emotions sometimes show on my face but I know how to handle it. There are days when I don't wear a smile on my face because I am not happy to do so.. and I like to keep it real, you know?
I thought pisceans were sensitive and emotional...? that's why when I don't see it on his face, I get majorly confused.
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