pisces male: shy or just not interested?
This topic was created in the Pisces forum by ariesscorp on Wednesday, July 5, 2006 and has 10 replies.
hello everyone--thanks in advance for all the advice! I have been reading these boards for a while, but this is my first post. I feel like my dilemma is relatively common. I'm an aries w/ scorpio moon, and at the risk of sounding immodest, generally have success with whoever I want to date. I have met a pisces male with a leo moon, though, and he is unlike anyone I have ever met. I am absolutely smitten.
To be honest, I didn't notice him at first, but since I have, I feel like with each day he draws me further out of my comfort zone, and I am putting my feelings on the line, but indirectly. However, he seems to maintain a torturously slow pace of communication--which I generally have to initiate. Everytime I get impatient and am ready to chuck the entire situation, he creeps out a little further, but his actions are ambiguous, so maybe it is just my wishful thinking? I really feel like a fool for even holding out hope; with anyone else, I would have given up. He is so special, that I would wait if he needs my patience, but I've read (here) how some pisces just hope you'll get the hint, if they don't want to directly reject you and hurt your feelings. I also hear from others, and from him, that he is *really* socially awkward.
So--(finally!)--my question is how to tell if he is shy or just not interested?
To be honest, I didn't notice him at first, but since I have, I feel like with each day he draws me further out of my comfort zone, and I am putting my feelings on the line, but indirectly. However, he seems to maintain a torturously slow pace of communication--which I generally have to initiate. Everytime I get impatient and am ready to chuck the entire situation, he creeps out a little further, but his actions are ambiguous, so maybe it is just my wishful thinking? I really feel like a fool for even holding out hope; with anyone else, I would have given up. He is so special, that I would wait if he needs my patience, but I've read (here) how some pisces just hope you'll get the hint, if they don't want to directly reject you and hurt your feelings. I also hear from others, and from him, that he is *really* socially awkward.
So--(finally!)--my question is how to tell if he is shy or just not interested?
He's probably not interested. Not like not interested in YOU, he probably not interested in any relationship at all.
What is his economical state?
What is his economical state?
thanks for the reply!
he is kind-of in a mixed economical state. He is currently in professional school, and will make a lot of money this summer and after graduation, but will probably also have a lot of debt. During the year, he doesn't really work and so he doesn't make a lot.
He asked me to dinner once, and the place wasn't really fancy, but he insisted on paying, which was sweet.
We attended the same professional school, so financially, we are both pretty equal in earning potential.
He does take on a lot of work, too--so you think he's just not interested in a relationship?
he is kind-of in a mixed economical state. He is currently in professional school, and will make a lot of money this summer and after graduation, but will probably also have a lot of debt. During the year, he doesn't really work and so he doesn't make a lot.
He asked me to dinner once, and the place wasn't really fancy, but he insisted on paying, which was sweet.
We attended the same professional school, so financially, we are both pretty equal in earning potential.
He does take on a lot of work, too--so you think he's just not interested in a relationship?
He does take on a lot of work, too--so you think he's just not interested in a relationship?
Yes.
Yes.
even though i tend to agree with haffo..
i would still however suggest you.. why not ask him out directly... nothing wrong with that... if you think his approach is ambiguous.. then you might consider trying this option :p
i would still however suggest you.. why not ask him out directly... nothing wrong with that... if you think his approach is ambiguous.. then you might consider trying this option :p
thanks, haffo and piscesboy.
I do feel like just asking because not knowing is so hard, and I feel like I can't just give up without be sure. BUT, I have been reluctant to ask for two reasons: (1) because he and I are friends, and have mutual friends, and I don't want it to be weird, and (2) I am afraid that even this will produce ambiguous results. Will a pisces give a straight answer, even if it is rejection, if I ask directly? I guess I assumed if he is interested, it would be too forward or brash, and if he isn't, he would be mortified at having to explain and feel like it was his fault that I thought he was (even though it is his fault!)
I really appreciate the help--it's great just to air this!
I do feel like just asking because not knowing is so hard, and I feel like I can't just give up without be sure. BUT, I have been reluctant to ask for two reasons: (1) because he and I are friends, and have mutual friends, and I don't want it to be weird, and (2) I am afraid that even this will produce ambiguous results. Will a pisces give a straight answer, even if it is rejection, if I ask directly? I guess I assumed if he is interested, it would be too forward or brash, and if he isn't, he would be mortified at having to explain and feel like it was his fault that I thought he was (even though it is his fault!)
I really appreciate the help--it's great just to air this!
If he is that great of a guy why then not take the chance and ask him? If you get the "just friends" response then you know for sure. Take a chance A-scorp...you only live once...just do it. Unfortunately alot of pisces want the other person to make the first move.
thanks, Judah...and Haffo and Piscesboy.
I think I will. You're right that you only live once, and I prefer directness anyway...
wish me luck
I think I will. You're right that you only live once, and I prefer directness anyway...
wish me luck
torturously slow pace of communication--
Heh heh. I know a Pisces just like that! I am best friends with his sister & got it on with him a couple of times before I met my Mr Aqua baby xx it was really difficult at first to have a conversation with him but I just gave up the 2 way conversation in the end & talked to him about everything & he liked that because he didn't have to talk
Um, I think what he finds attractive is a detached & seemingly confident person. He comes across as aloof & non committal but I know & his sister & him Mum know that he want a relationship - so what they say is not always what they mean
- proud boys that lot.
Had a big chat with him a few weeks ago & he was saying he doesn't chase girls -
do you know if mr Pisces has had a recent relationship??
Heh heh. I know a Pisces just like that! I am best friends with his sister & got it on with him a couple of times before I met my Mr Aqua baby xx it was really difficult at first to have a conversation with him but I just gave up the 2 way conversation in the end & talked to him about everything & he liked that because he didn't have to talk
Um, I think what he finds attractive is a detached & seemingly confident person. He comes across as aloof & non committal but I know & his sister & him Mum know that he want a relationship - so what they say is not always what they mean
- proud boys that lot. Had a big chat with him a few weeks ago & he was saying he doesn't chase girls -
do you know if mr Pisces has had a recent relationship??
hi, pisces,
hmmm--glad to know its not just me that has experienced the communication thing!
I really don't know about his past dating history, but I don't think he has had a relationship in a while. he never mentions one, and is not currently in one, but doesn't even ever really mention recent ones. I know he has had girlfriends before, but (and this is terrible, I know, plus a little weird) in the 2 1/2 years that I have known him, neither I nor any of our mutual friends have even known him to casually date. I thought is was just me, since we have only been friend (rather than acquaintances) for about 6-8 months, but one friend even described him as asexual...
so, yeah, not a charming picture, but trust me, he's a cutie! He's just not mainstream cute and very keep-to-himself--maybe even a little socially inept?
hmmm--glad to know its not just me that has experienced the communication thing!
I really don't know about his past dating history, but I don't think he has had a relationship in a while. he never mentions one, and is not currently in one, but doesn't even ever really mention recent ones. I know he has had girlfriends before, but (and this is terrible, I know, plus a little weird) in the 2 1/2 years that I have known him, neither I nor any of our mutual friends have even known him to casually date. I thought is was just me, since we have only been friend (rather than acquaintances) for about 6-8 months, but one friend even described him as asexual...
so, yeah, not a charming picture, but trust me, he's a cutie! He's just not mainstream cute and very keep-to-himself--maybe even a little socially inept?
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