Pisces men and loyalty

This topic was created in the Pisces forum by wednesdayschild on Friday, February 1, 2019 and has 15 replies.
So, I have a long distance relationship going on with a lovely Pisces man. We started talking in March 2018 and first met August 2018. We started as friends but things soon escalated into more, by which the Pisces told me that at that point he couldn't offer me more than FWB. I decided that was ok as we lived in different countries and it would be unrealistic at that point to regularly date and move things along. The only thing I asked him to be was honest, which we both agreed to as we had both been very hurt and betrayed in the past and didnt want that repeated. Plus our friendship was more like a soulmate connection so lying would have been destructive.

I visited again in October 2018 and he visited me for 14 days over the Christmas period. We had the best time and I could feel that he was starting to see me as more than a FWB but I decided to let him tell me, not ask him again. During all this time we have been talking every day, texting every day, calling for hours in an evening...literally as soon as we can talk we do.

So, a week ago we were talking and he actually told me he loved me. I asked, as a friend or more, by which he said much more. I was over the moon. That weekend was amazing, I was so happy as I had booked a flight to go there in February, so this was perfect.

But then THAT WEEKEND I received a message from a woman claiming that she was my Pisces man's FWB! She said she had been sleeping with him since October and that he spent weekends at her house. She was hurt that he hadnt told me about her, as she asked him to. I went crazy inside, called the Pisces and we had a fight...he admitted he had slept with her twice and done some video sex, but that he had told her it was nothing more. He said, how could he spend weekends at someone's house when we were always on the phone? That was true...I guess she was exaggerating. She sent me screenshots of convos and from what she showed there was nothing there except occasional sex. I spoke to his sister who told me he loved me a lot and would never hurt me. I sent her the screenshot as they were in a language I dont know well enough yet, and she said...he has said nothing except been nice to her as a friend, and lightly flirted.

Him and I talked calmly and he said that me and him werent a couple at that point and he had been truthful with both of us, but my issue was that he had promised to tell me everything. He realised he should have but was scared of losing me.

He told me he wants a commitment now. He has wanted to go forward as a couple since before Christmas and was going to tell me this and everything about the woman when I visited in Feb.

So now I feel conflicted. He tells me he loves me twice or more per day. He is so attentive, loving....everything he has always been and more, but they are only words! Until one of us relocates, its going to be reliant on words and trust.

My question is. Are Pisces men known to be loyal once they commit? He is such a sweet guy and is always 'rescuing' people, which has been an issue in the past with him as girls take it as more interest than just being 'nice' which he claims he is only doing.

I'd love another Pisces guy to help me here. I am so conflicted. I want to trust him so much but I dont want this hurt again in my life.

Life is pain.

All Pisces aren't the same.

You weren't in a commited relationship.

You aren't the cool, confident girl that can hear about other women and be fine.

You are not ready for a relationship if past pain is still influencing you with "never agains."

If you want forever, please realise he is human and sure to disappoint you in some way again within the course of forever.
I just asked him to tell me the truth and we always said we'd tell each other about dating or otherwise with other people.

I was talking about being lied to, that's what hurts. It's not standard for people to lie to each other in a relationship.

Did I say forever? No. Just for him to honour a commitment he has told me he wants. One that I didnt hassle him to give me.

Life can be painful but our relationships are supposed to enhance our lives, not screw us over. Being honest is the only thing that anyone can ask of another, forever
Posted by wednesdayschild

I just asked him to tell me the truth and we always said we'd tell each other about dating or otherwise with other people.

I was talking about being lied to, that's what hurts. It's not standard for people to lie to each other in a relationship.

Did I say forever? No. Just for him to honour a commitment he has told me he wants. One that I didnt hassle him to give me.

Life can be painful but our relationships are supposed to enhance our lives, not screw us over. Being honest is the only thing that anyone can ask of another, forever


You aren't the cool, confident girl that can hear about other women and be fine.

So if someone is in a committed relationship, they should be ok about their other half seeing other women/men?

I don't understand you.

I didnt ask if I was cool or ask for a character analysis smile
Why are you entertaining virtual relationships like this? If some woman dialed my phone for someone I’m not committed to I would move on. He lied. So now you’re asking if you should trust him after he lied? What sense does that make. This is too much of a red flag/forshadowing for me. But you built him up so much in your head, I can tell how you wrote the post, that you will move forward. You want someone here to validate that decision to make you feel secure.

She’s not the only one I can guarantee it. Also just because you spoke on the phone doesn’t mean he didn’t spend the weekend with her on several occasions. Stop making excuses for liars.
And “ we were always on the phone sounds like an exaggeration in itself. This guy is good really good at manipulating.
We have met up 3 times since the 'virtual relationship' started.

I get it. You wouldn't have a virtual relationship, nor would you try and understand or forgive a guy in this situation. I just asked a question but you are coming across quite aggressive. Thanks for your response but I don't need that kind of negativity, just some support here.
Posted by wednesdayschild

So if someone is in a committed relationship, they should be ok about their other half seeing other women/men?

I don't understand you.

I didnt ask if I was cool or ask for a character analysis smile
From what you wrote, you were not in a committed relationship. When I'm seeing someone in a FWB, I'm not delusional enough to not expect that they are sexually active with others.

As you said, "I visited again in October 2018 and he visited me for 14 days over the Christmas period. We had the best time and I could feel that he was starting to see me as more than a FWB..."

He is right,

"Him and I talked calmly and he said that me and him werent a couple at that point and he had been truthful with both of us..."

You say that after all of this...

"He told me he wants a commitment now. 

I don't think you can get the kind of assurances you will need in a long distance relationship. You might be biting off more than you can chew. FWBs, fucbuddies, long distance relationships, open relationships... are not for the slight of heart.
Oh, and here's a passive aggeessive smile back atcha.

smile

LMAO

That smiley looks like a victim waiting to happen, or a dumbass, lol.

That's why I don't use them, lol

I would trust him. You are in a fwb relationship so if he didn’t tell you about her is because she is not that important. He wants you two to be exclusive it’s a good sign that he loves you and he has made his mind up.
I’m confused by his label of fwb. Had you already slept with him before you learned about the other woman?
Posted by VenusAquarius

Life is pain.

All Pisces aren't the same.

You weren't in a commited relationship.

You aren't the cool, confident girl that can hear about other women and be fine.

You are not ready for a relationship if past pain is still influencing you with "never agains."

If you want forever, please realise he is human and sure to disappoint you in some way again within the course of forever.
Word.. What she said 👌🏽
U have 2 look at it from this point of view; if he didn’t tell u about the other girl when u guys are just FWB cuz he “didn’t wanna lose u” , what makes u think he will tell u he cheated on u when u guys are in a committed relationship?
Thanks everyone smile