Screw Your Opinion

I can't figure out if this is a male-female thing or a Pisces-Taurus issue.

I'm in the midst of some big changes and I've been attempting to keep Catfish aware of what I'm thinking as some of my decisions may have an impact on our relationship. Where I'm keeping him in the loop, it's important to note that I have decided nothing and am merely speaking extemporaneously when I bring these issues/concerns to him. After all, I'm a bull and it takes us forever to change so when I suggest to him that I might do this/that, I am merely being contemplative and not on the verge of some life changing decision. Sure, I may be extremely animated and excited (blame the Aries in me) and where the actions will follow, I generally only make a move after I have mentally exhausted the outcomes of all possible scenarios (blame the Libra in me).

The problem I'm facing is that when I go to Catfish and share what I'm considering, he interjects with what he feels I should do. Maybe this is because men and women have different approaches to problems? Women just want to talk it out...we're not looking for a solution. Men, on the other hand, are looking for just that...problem? => solve problem.

Although I know when he offers suggestions that he's only trying to be helpful and where his advice is sound based on the picture I've painted, it irks me that he begins framing my portrait while I'm still painting the landscape.

Today when he offered insight I did what I typically do; I negated his suggestion by either making my painting more real than impressionist and/or painting a few more bushes. In other words, I let him know that he's half-cocked and that there's more to the story than his solution considers.

My question is, is it a male thing or a Pisces thing? Pisces are supposed to be fixers but maybe he's just being a man and wants me to stop whining and do something already?

Oh and I had written this earlier but ended up getting into a discussion with Catfish about it. I thought he may have picked up on the fact that I was a bit perturbed by his suggestions earlier and he didn't seem to be aware. When I explained to him that I wasn't sure if it was a male-female disconnect or a Pisces-Taurus issue, he said that he understood where I was coming from but for him, he takes the approach that at some point you just have to git 'er dun!

I still would like to know if Pisces are the type to just cut to the chase when it comes to suggesting a course of action? I don't get this sense from my Pisces bff but I'm not dating her...and she's a chick so she's afflicted with the mindless-weighing-of-all-options gene too.

Ain't Fire fun? 'Shit or get off the pot' approach. Besos lady. LOL And I'm laughing WITH you, not AT you. 🙂

eep! that's pretty much what he said. i'm not even sure if he and i reached and accord when we spoke earlier. i told him he irked me. he did a verbal shrug.

maybe i'm the problem? i like bouncing ideas off people but i don't want their actual opinions on what i should do. i don't partner well (he told me that too). not sure what he meant by it but i was too absorbed with me to ask him to clarify.

HA!

an^ accord

I understand. And I think it's like this: *hand flying over head like airplane* instead of this at times: *both hands locked together* but as long as you're both aware of it, big whoop. This is you and his dynamic at work. Communication is important in every relationship. It sounds like he's there for you to bounce off of just fine. ( His reaction amused me.."So what if I irk you woman, still standing here, aren't I?" ) But I completely get the whole woman reaction of just "Hush and let me speak, all I need is for you to listen so I can just process."
It seems to me you are both fairly strong-willed individuals learning to bend and lean as a unit, not independently.
And if I'm completely off the beam here, the floor is yours madam. 🙂

nope that's about right. we're both very prideful and i must say, he is far more receptive to my advice than i am to his. his advice is often good but i'm usually in a perpetual "i know, i know" mode most of the time.

and yes, the one thing we do well is communicate. if there's a problem, we will talk it out. i very much like that about him. he's introspective and thoughtful which is pretty rare to find in a man.

Posted by caligula
nope that's about right. we're both very prideful and i must say, he is far more receptive to my advice than i am to his. his advice is often good but i'm usually in a perpetual "i know, i know" mode most of the time.

and yes, the one thing we do well is communicate. if there's a problem, we will talk it out. i very much like that about him. he's introspective and thoughtful which is pretty rare to find in a man.

🙂 I'm glad for both of you actually. Have out my pom-poms and Spanx just for the occasion.

Posted by LittleAquanot
In my experience, I think it is more of a man thing. The Pisceans I know aren't like that unless there's a heavy fire or air influence elsewhere in their charts. You touched on this in your original post. Women are more likely to listen and be supportive, and expect the same thing when approaching others with a "problem" unless they specifically ask for suggestions. Men are problem solvers. You come to them with an issue, and they aren't all that interested in sitting and listening to someone drone on about an issue without coming to any conclusions.

With that said, I, LittleAquanot, am guilty of being a "problem solver." My girlfriends have called me on it a few times. I'm a Moon Piscean and an Aries rising, if that means anything at all to you. However, I only get like this once I tire of hearing someone bring up the same issue over and over. I figure, if you're repeatedly revisiting the same...damn...issue then, clearly, you must need some assistance wrapping that on up. Generally, I'm a doer, not a talker. So, I can get easily irritated with people who are less proactive than I am. It's a personality flaw that I'm working on.

yeah, that's the conclusion i'm settling on. most fish i know aren't pushy and dude does have some fire in his chart so...

i think the problem i have when i'm on the receiving end of advice is if the suggestion is contrary to what i've decided to do atm. if you're agreeing with me, i'm right as rain. if not, you irk me and you're not listening.

i can be quite the bitch.

Can't we all? I'm pushy and am a Bobcat earth mover in human form occasionally. I'm sure I'm a right pain in the ass at times.

I think Taurus and Pisces can be an excellent match if they give each other room to just be themselves. It is hard for Taurus to allow space at times, but if it's understood that this is regenerative time, and a positive thing it will be alright methinks. "You swim, I'll be tidying up and making meals." On the flip side of that if Pisces stands still and realizes that in Taurus they have a very real giver of care that is a very good thing indeed. It's good for heart, good for soul. Pisces has its head in the clouds, Taurus is the anchor. And together they can experience everything the heavens and earth have to offer.
Relationships needn't be full of drama and tears to make them outstanding. Just my 2??.