gift for a pisces

This topic was created in the Relationships & Astrology forum by chloe701 on Tuesday, December 4, 2007 and has 51 replies.
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He's an ex bf but I still consider a friend. We've been friends for 15 years and every year we do exchange gifts. A month ago we broke up, he hurt me badly but i'm in the process of forgiving. Do I still give him a x mass present? If yes, I would really appreciate some suggestions. I have a hard time asking friends for suggestions coz nobody knows we've had an affair. What's the most impersonal gift I can give a pisces.I've always been extravagant with him. What can I give him that would not suggest anything or create a response or would not make his gf jealous. Help!!
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Starfish thanks. I thought about that..I'm considering it.
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Moro yeah cd is good too!! lol He can use it to scrape the ice on his windshield..
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You guys are great...Bijou that's a great idea...
One of our close friends actually wanted to know what I was going to get him, she was curious..she suggested the iPhone coz he was talking about getting one for awhile now..I didnt know what to say, I run to that ladies room and started crying..That's one of the things on his christmas list..I didnt know what to tell my friend..
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Lord! Do NOT give an ex an iPhone! Or an iPod...or anything with an "i" in it. Get one for yourself instead.
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lol I got one for myself. You should all get it. As for my ex I've decided to get him a gift card.
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What did you guys get for your friend/ex? Just curiuos. The iphone is really cool, it has everything, phone, camera,games,gps,safari, youtube,music, videos, calendar etc.
BTW, the ex is becoming really really I mean extremely nice to me these past week...Don't know what it means.I guess maybe christmas is coming..
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I don't buy things for my exes....did I miss a memo?
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don't get him anything - I went through this with my pisces ex...trust me don't do it
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my pisces ex lied to me about why he was breaking up with me - he had been in a relationship for seven years and was engaged and told me that the ex wanted him back and he felt like he had to give it a try, because he felt like he had wasted those years of her life.
I actually felt sorry for him, and I sent him a christmas present.
At any rate he he got in touch me a couple months later telling me how much he missed me and all.... so I figured she must have left him again [she kept doing that...] and found out the hard way that he had actually been cheating on me with some little tramp he met at his new job...and was still with her.
I realized that by trying to continue to be friends with him I was putting myself in a position for him to "swim" in and out of my life as he pleased...
to the OP - I say no christmas present - cut him off entirely if you can. you've been friends for fifteen years, if he really cares he'll come after you - if not then better to be done with him now.
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dpisces sun, bijou, angelfish
Thanks,check out my very first thread here "lovers to strangers" and I would like for you check out the other one too "libra vs. scorpio".
I'm new at this forum thing, I guess it'll be best if I just stick to one thread right?
Well anyways you guys in dxp have help more than you guys can imagine.
I did something stupid though. I got carried away when i was shopping, I got him a watch but I still have it, our last day of work is tomorrow, I hope I'm strong enough to not give it to him . I'll keep you posted.
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Bijou this is from my other thread that I just started a couple of days ago.
"I'm a libra female (I started the thread "lovers to strangers").This past couple of weeks my ex a pisces (who btw is not even legally divorced yet but seperated) has been paying me alot of attention and approaching me(I work with him) but 90% of the time our conversation has been mostly about work. I've been taking most of the advise from the wonderful people here on dxp which is to not communicate with him on a personal level and move on with my life and that's what i've been doing.I've been working out, eating healthy going out and having fun, I bought myself a new car. I can actually say that I'm feeling good and beautiful inside and out,I threw most of my clothes and change my whole wardrobe and been getting alot of attention and compliments and lets say i'm becoming very popular at work. Yesterday gf of my ex who is a scorpio(who btw is married with two kids)approached me and her exact words were "you want to compete with me? i'll give you competition" I was caught off guard, I was speechless, I was so shocked, I know nobody knows that her bf and me had an affair everybody knows we're just friends. I want to say something but I don't want to stoop to her level. I was trying to move on for crying out loud!! I can definitely compete with her if I want to but I won't like I said I won't stoop to her level. Should I tell her bf what she told me? I don't want to be part of this mess!! But i'm just curious libra vs.scorpio who do you think will win? lol. I know we're very different.
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Angelfish
I'm sorry you have to go through that I can definitely relate.It's a feeling I won't wish even to my worst enemy. Its just been two months since we just both walked out on our relationship as in just walked out, we never talked about it or what happened between us our friendship of 15 years our affair, everything it just stopped, vanished as if it never happened. It's hard because I have to see him everyday at work, and we do talk at work but like I said 90% is work related and 10% is just "good morning" how are you stuff and about our friends who works with us as well.
I've known him a long time and I think he misses me and this not communicating with him on a personal level I think is getting to him. I dont wanna play mind games with him, I've made up my mind to move on. I just hope and I'm praying that i'm strong enough to stick with that decision.
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I did respond in that libra vs scorp thread before.... this is not a friendship I would concern myslef with....if after 15 years he cares so little about your friendship [and that IS what's going on here] then why are you worried about him? Pisces are another sign that tend to get attached to things and people. but they do compartmentalize everything and everyone - they keep one here, one there, and another over in the corner. I oove my pisces ex dearly [as a friend] but I simply can't let him back into my life. After he broke up with the tramp he was cheating on me with he went looking for me - even went to work at a company he thought I was working at [I had mentioned it to him that I was applying there before the last time we stopped speaking] and made a big deal of trying to get close to my best friend that works there. I emailed him once to ask how he was doing and if he had called the drug councelor I refered him to - he wanted to talk about me and what was going on in my life and I simply refused to. Once he told me he was doing okay and staying clean [for now.....] I simply said I was doing okay and let it go. It hurts me to do that because I'm a very caring person and I know he doesn't take care of himself....eats nothing but fast food, doesn't sleep, and his nerves are shot like they'd been put in a blender.... so I understand how hard it can be to walk away from someone you care about. But if you let him take advantage of you he will. He may not see it that way - but that's what he's doing.
I wonder if he knows how the scorp approached you? if he does and hasn't said anything to her or apologized to you then that should be a very clear sign to you.
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"3)he has told her that you are a stalker [something not that unusual for a pisces]"

ha ha ha ha ha ha so true........ my ex tried to do that too... stupid man... I kept all of the emails, texts, voice mails, and....PICTURES he sent me... put a stop to that nonsense right away....
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Moro1920000
I left out one thing on my threads about him.The reason being is I know I'm gonna get a lot of criticism and more harsh words.But here it goes anyways.He's my boss, he got promoted back in June.Yes its stupid having an affair with a married man(separated) and worse your boss(7 months now).I know all about the ups and downs of office romance and the "don't shit where you eat stuff"
Moro I know you're gonna say get away and quit my job but I love my job I can't imagine doing anything else I've been doing this for 15 years.I don't want to give up my career because of a man.I dont wanna start over and end up being unhappy personally and professionally.
Moro I can do this!! This is my chance to prove to myself that i'm strong and not just a spoiled girl. I'm not gonna runaway from this. You know what they say the best revenge is living well. he didnt break me, I'm young, I'm single,I'm attractive, I have my dream job, I have friends and family that adores me,I"m starting to get my self confidence back, I'm dating and having fun.
I WILL forget him and move on!!
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I meant "dont sh*t where you eat stuff"
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lol okay butter
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oh don't worry chloe - my ex pisces was the one who hired me !
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Moro
I didn't give him the gift not even a card,I just said Merry Christmas and he gave me a hug but he gave me something and stupid of me I accepted it, he insisted. He asked me to read the card and open the box in front of him(gf wasn't around he made sure of it). I didn't say anything about the gift I just said thank you and didn't say anything else, I walked away, tears falling but I didn't let him see it ofcourse.It was a very personal gift and so was the stuff written on the card.I'm so confused.
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Moro
Thanks..Should I trust him again? Should I believe everything he wrote on the card.After everything I've read about pisces here on dxp, your experiences with them, your advise I dont think I want to. Moro I'm 33 years old and the truth is,i've only been involve in a serious relationship twice, he's the second one. The first one didn't last very long and I didn't really invest much in it, that relationship didnt do much for me.
Moro like you said,i've wasted enough precious time with him. I still do love him..This past month there are times where i find myself thinking about him and my heart will be racing and tears will fall.
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DpiscesSun
Thanks for your advice, I am trying to focus on myself. It's just tough during this time of year where your thinking about everybody. Seeing family and friends and how happy they are and I realized that's what I want to more than anything is to be happy.
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Moro..I got a personal letter(hand written) from him along with the christmas card. You and the others here on dxp have a lot of experience here dealing with a relationship with a pisces well actually relationship in general.I know you guys must be wondering why i'm seeking advice here dxp.The truth is I have no one to talk about my relationship with this man because of the fact that we have the same circle of friends and family and work.I do know him for 15 years as a friend,the last two years as secret lover.The point is the content of the letter kinda explained everything to me,he's actions towards me for the last few months.Like I said I'm confused about the whole thing that was written because of the trust issue.Anyways, he started off with how much he missed me, that for 3 months now he's back with his family and trying to work things out(i guess he lied to me about the divorce)he said they're going for counselling in two weeks.He also said that Patrick our president of the company we work for has asked him to scout for a new Marketing director and the position should be filled by febraury 2008 and that I'm his first and only candidate for that position and he said that everybody in the company would agree with him.Anyways, he didnt say anything about his gf and he closed off the letter by saying "I have failed you"
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Moro..the letter is saying that he's liar. I think what he needs is individual therapy resolve some of his personal issues..He said he's back with his wife when he's parading around with the evil married woman...Cwaaaaap!
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Moro. I know I can find a job easily...starting over is the hardest part. Like I said I love my job/career. I dont know about starting 2008 unemployed and loveless lol. I'm a typical libra I do make decisions the libra way. Moro it did crossed my mind finding a new job,but I dont wanna make that decision right now I'm hurting and I'm gonna wait till I'm done with this phase.
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I think i'm on the "I'm angry phase"
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Bijou I read your post,you gave me a lot to think about and I do appreciate all your advise and your insights but I have alot more to loose I mean A LOT MORE if I take your advise.
Moro,dpiscessun,angelfish I know you don't agree but I'm gonna stick to my job right now and I'm gonna get that promotion and rise above this ordeal. The way I see it i'm already the winner at the end of each day.I have the power right now over him and her. I'm starting to get my life back and them their troubles are just beginning. I still have the trust respect and admiration of my colleages my friends and most of all my family and the two of them won't have that.
Bijou I always catch him staring at me, I can see it and feel his emotional turmoil and the funny thing is I feel no remorse whatsoever. He initiates all the contacts with me and I make sure it's all proffesional.
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I only disagree if you can't really handle being around him....which you've said you've been crying over him.... my pisces ex went to work for a company I had mentioned wanting to work for before he and I stopped talking - he thought I had gone to work there. Then he tried to buddy up with my best friend..... I really wanted to go to work there because it is a good company and I really wanted to be with my friend - we're very close. BUT i had to ask myself whether I could handle having to see him everyday..... I don't think I could. I don't want him back, but it would still kill me....especially having to know all about his personal life and the little sluts he runs around with....especially since every woman he's ever worked with has been after him.....
but if you think you can handle it and/or you don't have any other options...then do what you've gotta do... but if you're just staying to "show him" and it's going to be hard on you [emotionally] then you're only hurting yourself....sometimes empowerment isn't about digging in your heels...sometimes it's about walking away.
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angelfish
Thanks for sharing, he's actually doing the same thing right now asking my friends and family about what's going on with my personal life but doesn't bother me. Even if I quit my job I'd still see him anyways through friends and family gatherings and parties.
Nothing he does shocks me anymore. I can handle it emotionally. Everyday i tell myself that he's a trash and so is he's gf. They're both selfish.
My sun is in libra moon in Pisces mercury in Scorpio. I have four libra in my chart.
His sun is in Pisces moon in Capricorn mercury in Pisces.
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yes, it seems they will do that.Mine even admitted to trying to look up my insurance license to see where I was working. At the time though I was not working for medical reasons so it didn't help him any since he didn't know that and there was no work address on my licnese information. But as I said he tried to buddy up with my best friend who works there and he called me - mind you this was AFTER he tried to threaten me with a restraining order and I had to threaten him back with the truth....they can be relentless.....
One thing that I have come to realize though is that I know he loves me - but loving me would not keep him faithful. And that is the end as far as I'm concerned.
You may be in the same situation - or, if I may.... you may be one of the girls he's after despite loving someone else...for example his wife.... could be either. In either case though it does not sound like a good situation.
Especially with the scorp around - if he was careful to make sure she wasn't around when he gave you your present then clearly he knows he is doing something wrong.
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To be perfectly honest with you, Chloe, I find all of this in here completely absurd and biased, based off of other peoples "bad" experiences. Whatever horrid episodes happened in the responsers personal lives is being projected onto you, as though your Pisces friend is their ex .. for someone to say that they have experienced something is one thing, but to tell you that YOUR Pisces friend is going to do it, is ridiculous.
The best advice you have been given by far, was from Freebird when she expressed to you that people have thier own lives to live.
For over a decade, you and him have been friends and very close. According to your original post that Freebird responded to, you did NOT say that he cheated on you, you said that your relationship with him ended by him swimming away to find love in another.
This is his right .. this is his life.
Of course, your feelings are hurt .. but, this is apart of life. People come and go and the only thing we can do is to love to our fullest and when it's time to part .. we make sure we have fond memories of love to carry forward as a gift to give our next life-partner in love.
This man isn't going to stop being your friend, nor is he in control of what another woman is going to say to you. It's up to you to determine whether he is worthy enough for your love in a different way now .. called friendship. It's not easy to put hurt feelings in check after a union has ended .. in fact, it's probably the hardest thing a person can go through .. but, you have to evaluate what is important to you.
If his friendship is important to you .. then you have to be mature about it and be happy for him that he has found love again. It appears to me that people in here who have been scorned would want you to hate a person you have been fond of for 14 years.
Disgrace .....
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Revenge .. wasted time ..
OM fucking G

Chloe .. to love a person is NEVER wasted time. This is why we are alive. In the end, the only thing we have to hold onto are our memories .. they should of quality we have found in life, the beauty, smiles, what made us laugh, what made our heart pound with love and joy.
If you spend a lifetime thinking about revenge because somebody once loved you, and considered it wasted time .. then your life would have meant nothing .. it was all in vain.
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Hi P angel!
I'm really happy to see you here in my thread. I was actually waiting. Before I started my thread I was reading alot of stuff in Pisces forum ofcourse to gain insights about Pisces man.
I wanted to understand how someone I've known for a long time who loved and cared about me do what he did. So I thought I'd try astrology to get some answers. Your insights about Pisces people I found it to very accurate in relation to my ex.
Your about his age actually.Your right we did have alot of good memories.He thought me alot of things, some I know will stay with me forever.
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"For over a decade, you and him have been friends and very close. According to your original post that Freebird responded to, you did NOT say that he cheated on you, you said that your relationship with him ended by him swimming away to find love in another"
P angel
I confronted him about seeing him flirt with someone, he got mad. He swam away and went to that someone.
Yes, I thought about revenge..I thought I would tell his wife or his gf but I couldnt do it. I thought I will get that promotion and since I'm much more creative than he is i'll make the president of our company see that I could do a better job than my ex is doing fire his arse. Or I could go to our HR and file some complaints. Bottom line is I couldnt do it.
After reading all your posts in the pisces forum and reading his letter, I realized why he did what he did. He was trying to protect me, he wanted me to be happy coz he couldn't give that happiness and the kind of life I wanted from him. He didn't like what i've become or what became of my life, the lies, the deceit the secrecy to my friends and to my family. Going to parties and family gatherings alone all the time.
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Pisces people have the wonderful gift of being able to remain friends with our past lovers .. in fact, many of us, if we divorce, will buy a house right next door to our exes, so the offspring (kids & pets) can be shared .. affectionately. If you listen in the Pisces board, we often talk about exes that we will cherish for the rest of our lives.
He will always want to be your friend .. if we love somebody, we have to embrace this. The only circumstances in which we don't continue with a friendship with exes is because the ex wants no parts of us and it's their choice to become estranged.
People get confused, such as you are now. You have to understand that he is confused also. He knows his marriage is suffering (and has been for a while), so he's trying to recover by going to counseling .. but, he's still obviously unsure of exactly what he's doing, and so is trying to mask his hurt feelings with Scorpio lady.
But, this doesn't mean he still doesn't love you for the person you are, and the beautiful moments. He said in his letter: I have failed you .. Chloe, a person who hates another, or wishes ill-will, or to mis-treat another isn't going to say something like that. This means, he is so sorry that you got hurt by him. His actions are showing that he still cares.
Being a Pisces .. he has the gift of being able to be friends with you, I know he does because we all do .. and he's proving this by not only being kind to you (now that he's healed enough to talk to you again), but, also by making sure you know that you will always have a place in the company, even a higher position .. which is because you deserve the post, and your collegues even agree. And it seems obvious to me that this is what he wants. He wasn't wasted time .. NOT EVER !! Nobody is a waste to whom brings a person happiness, beit family, collegues, friends, neighbors.
Nobody can tell you the right thing to do .. however, I can tell you that he would want you to keep your job, so he can look at you everyday with a smile in hopes that one day you will forgive him for breaking your heart, and in hopes that one day you will love him as a friend again.
Once we love a person in our hearts, it's forever .. even our most horrid experiences loving another person isn't regarded for what failed (after we've healed from the injury) .. we regard the person for how we loved them, how they moved our souls. I promise you that smile .. I know, for I live it everyday.
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Bijou
I think i've calmed down and what I realized is that I want to be happy more than anything. I guess that's my next journey find out what will make me happy. I wish happines for you too Bijou.
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"He was trying to protect me, he wanted me to be happy coz he couldn't give that happiness and the kind of life I wanted from him. He didn't like what i've become or what became of my life, the lies, the deceit the secrecy to my friends and to my family. Going to parties and family gatherings alone all the time."

Yes .. he knows he can't love you the way you needed him to as a life-partner .. however, he does still love you because his actions are expressing this love by embracing you with kindness and concern.
I could just imagine how he must have felt ... there you were, his secret that he wanted to climb to rooftops and scream out to the world but couldn't ... something like that would tear a Pisces to shreds.
Our mission in which we know all the way down to our souls ... is to wrap our whole world around you. This is what we do, when in love .. we HAVE to completely meld .. you become our world, everything we live for. And if he couldn't do that .. then in his eyes, he couldn't love you enough to make you happy.
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bijou is a Pisces expert .. her insights into our true nature is quite uncanny. There's a special Pisces man out there somewhere, waiting for their paths to cross.
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P angel
Should I be avoiding pisces men in the future? Should I run like hell?
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Bijou
I'll check out those books. Thank you!
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Once, I had a man who was a Libra and was deeply in love with him, still am in memory of the beauty he brought me.
None of us should avoid any person who can make your world flip up-side-down, from my perspective .. that's what we're living for. smile .. to experience these sensations.
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moro
I'm taking it one step at a time. It's funny how you mentioned "sister" I'm thinking how close you are to knowing how my real situation is. That's how I was to him before we started sleeping together. He was the son my dad never had. He started working for my dad at a really young age. His dad past away when he was 12, my dad became his father figure. His oldest son is bestfriends with one of my nephew. I'm the youngest of four girls I'm the only single left. He was so down when he's marriage started falling apart. I work with him so I was always there for him, I have my own house and he was always there drinking then passing out. I tried boost his confidence back and I did but then I fell in love.
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We fell in love so I thought.
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Moro my reality is whether I like it or not this man is still gonna be part of my life. I know I made a big mess, I'm facing the consequences.I wish we could go back to being the way we used to be before we became lovers, it's impossible. I want him to be happy too, I just wish being with his family is where his happiness is and not with that other married woman.I don't want that woman near my nephew or be part of our family. He got rid of me just like that why not get rid of that other woman too and focus on his marriage.
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Is it so hard for a Pisces to get rid of a Scorpio once they have that connection? They haven't been that long together, it's only been a few months, why can't he see the dangers like the rest of us his friends and his colleagues sees. She' a already displaying unprofessionalism and mistakes work and she's getting away with it every single one.
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Chloe .. Pisces seeks out emotionally strong people. And the Scorpio appears this way to us .. however, it doesn't take long before we realize that a strong person doesn't have to boast about it, they don't have to strut around proving their strength.
It will dawn on him that she is actually insecure. If you want him to look at you again with those loving eyes, then you have to show him that you're emotionally strong, for this is what we seek.
Don't be effected by her ... carry on as though nothing has happened and she is just an ordinary person. Here's the thing .. if he sees that she is able to evoke emotional responses in you, then he'll see you as emotionally weak, instead of her.
Turn it around ... remain composed and don't allow her to effect you. And in your stance of showing controlled feelings, as she attempts to taunt you .. he'll see that you are the stronger one.

I went back and re-read all of this and I have a question: If nobody knew that you two were a couple, then why exactly would she come up to you and taunt you with competing over him?
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P angel
At that time, my ex was coming up to me quite often but most of the time it's business related, we had to do a couple of presentation before we go for the holidays. She did see me alone with him in his office quite a few times but it was strictly business.I was already trying to move on at that point, during those meetings my ex grabbed my hand and squeezed it and we just stared at each other no personal words came out, the gf walked in and saw that. P angel to my knowledge nobody knows, we were always very careful I was always the one who made sure of it. I didn't wanna be labeled as the other woman coz he wasn't legally divorced yet.I didn't wanna ruin his chance for that higher position, he's had his eye on that for awhile even before we were together.
His gf right now struck me as the needy kind always wants attention, I mean I don't wanna judge but y else would she wear a very revealing clothes to work or talk about her sexual escapades to people she hardly knows and thinks very poorly of her husband.
P angel
I don't want a romantic relationship with him anymore. I wish with all my heart to be how we used to be friends/family. Do you think its possible?
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Scorpios are pretty intuitive .. just that silent exchange between the two of you with your eyes was probably enough for her to realize that there were currents running underneath the surface.
"I don't want a romantic relationship with him anymore. I wish with all my heart to be how we used to be friends/family. Do you think its possible?"
Yeah, I do smile
Try thinking about it this way ... this woman started behaving differently, wearing revealing clothes, and whatever else to get his attention .. but, isn't that just a "play" for this attention? To play for attention isn't the same as a person who actually has his attention because she truly cares about him.
How much can a person really and truly care about another if the only reason she got him was by playing him? Chloe, he's just confused right now, his marriage is a mess, his positioning at work for higher grounds was at stake, he had a little secret (you) that was tearing him apart. We all get mixed up and sometimes blindly follow when it's the wrong path.
I think just by you standing strong and wanting to remain friends with him will show him who is real and who isn't.
Flings don't last .. real friends are forever. smile

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A Pisces female relationship with an Aquarian male is so hard. They are so distant and never really want to settle down and commit. Aquarius is turned on constantly by the mind, they can be so boring sometimes. Pisces likes adventure and passion and emotions. My Aquarian is so smart and so wonderful but at the same time is so tactless I want to smack him. Deep inside I long for that perfect Scorpio match that I know is perfect for me.
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hi p angel and bijou!
How you guys doing? Sorry I haven't been able to respond to your last posts, schedule been very hectic well i prefer it this way give me less time to think of my love situation. Been burying my self with work.I've been thrown 5 new accounts at work all at the same time,I think their testing me if I can handle the pressure for the new position,I want it really bad and from the looks of it I think it's mine !! My team is really helping me out a great deal their routing for me.
I've been working really close with my Pisces ex/boss and he's been very helpfull and supportive.I'm trying my best to keep our relationship strictly proffesional so far I'm doing really good,he's the one who keeps initiating personal talks and he's been unsuccesful hahaha.I can feel his frustrations.I don't aak about his personal life either.I'm not ready to be friends yet.We've never talked about what happened between us, he hasn't apologize verbally but his actions is saying alot of things.I'm still angry sometimes I would be really mean to him of say something sarcastic or make fun of him and his gf and he'll just take everything or he'll say "I deserve that". Being a Pisces I know it hurts him to hear all those mean remarks from me but he doesn't seem to be pulling away or avoiding it. When we find ourselves alone it feel so awkward and he'd accidentally brushed against me or my hands my arms sometimes his face will be so close to mine and just stare at my eyes my whole face.
The blinds in his office are wide open now he doesn't close them anymore and my cubicle is right across so I see him staring at me all the time.His gf is complaining about his blinds being up all the time.Sometimes when I know his looking I would flirt with a coworker. I know I will be pushing away by doing this. Time will tell.
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