Hes Having A BABY?
This topic was created in the Relationships & Astrology forum by FeelnStupid on Wednesday, January 7, 2009 and has 8 replies.
Ive been dating a Libra man for 2 years Its been very serious from the start.. Im a Taurus. weve had some Bumby roads and There is no doubt about How much Love there is beteween us. But I think ive been walking around with the wool over my eyes.We seperated in Nov we Had hit some " rough patches" We still talked on the phone here and there but made up on new years. NOw its only been 6 DAYS in this year, a young woman called me and told me she was seeing him off and on for the past 18 months she has no idea he had a woman and shes 8 weeks pregnant with my librans baby,she then told me it was an acident she was a late night thing for him. She told me he came to one appt and he was NOT happy didnt want the baby but woud be wlling to man up (would be his first) Me and him have been trying for kids for a year and im just heartbroken. HE is denying her Up and down LIke you wouldnt believe. There is no proof and shes gettng an abortion because she has a Husband also! I dont know what to do AND WHAT TO BELIEVE Fellas: WOuld you tell the truth if you could get away with it? He Gets explosivly angry when a bring it up. Im wondering if maybe i should back off? im so confused!Please sound advice only. im hurting.
He's probably not in love with you anymore. Dump him.
He's not happy with you...or with her.
He's not happy with you...or with her.
Some things to think about .....
"a young woman called me and told me she was seeing him off and on for the past 18 months she has no idea he had a woman"
If she had no idea that he was seeing you, then how did she know to even call you? Would he tell her about you? How else could she possibly know about you then? Perhaps, she looked in his cell phone when he wasn't looking .... but, still, why would a woman who isn't intimate with him even care to snoop in his cell phone to see what he's doing?
You say he denies it, and gets angry ... thing is .. the innocent have nothing to fear, do they?
Seems odd to me that for the 2 years the two of you have been dating, that while 75% of that time, if he was seeing her also, that if she was this distrusting of him that she would snoop behind his back to look in his cell phone ... do you really thing someone this paranoid is going to wait a year and a half to see if he can be trusted?
the whole thing seems sketchy .... just now, when she just happens to bump into you, she is pregnant ... I don't know if I would believe that. I don't think I would believe that a woman who is married, fucking a man on the side would be so careless as to get pregnant by her lover.
Here's what I think happened ... your man just started to see this woman during your break since November, and she is young, paranoid and jealous .... so she snooped into his cell phone, found your number in there, and record to show how often he calls you .. and she phoned you, probably not even sure who was going to be on the recieving end. When she heard your voice and you introduced yourself ... she lied to you, telling you she was pregnant and had been seeing him all this time.
Because that's what paranoid girls do when they are jealous of other women to whom makes them feel threatened.
Because her story doesn't hold up .... a man who is fucking another man's woman would NOT own up to being the father, especially a man to whom she claims they only see each other on and off.
I'm telling you, as sure as I'm sitting here ... a man who is bagging another man's wife on the side is NOT going to man-up and claim ownership to a pregnancy, feelnstupid.
There's holes all through her story.
I wouldn't be so quick to believe everything she told you. Certainly, I would believe she exists, for she did find your number somewhere on him and he is angry if you mention her .... but, the rest of this I would regard as bullshit
"a young woman called me and told me she was seeing him off and on for the past 18 months she has no idea he had a woman"
If she had no idea that he was seeing you, then how did she know to even call you? Would he tell her about you? How else could she possibly know about you then? Perhaps, she looked in his cell phone when he wasn't looking .... but, still, why would a woman who isn't intimate with him even care to snoop in his cell phone to see what he's doing?
You say he denies it, and gets angry ... thing is .. the innocent have nothing to fear, do they?
Seems odd to me that for the 2 years the two of you have been dating, that while 75% of that time, if he was seeing her also, that if she was this distrusting of him that she would snoop behind his back to look in his cell phone ... do you really thing someone this paranoid is going to wait a year and a half to see if he can be trusted?
the whole thing seems sketchy .... just now, when she just happens to bump into you, she is pregnant ... I don't know if I would believe that. I don't think I would believe that a woman who is married, fucking a man on the side would be so careless as to get pregnant by her lover.
Here's what I think happened ... your man just started to see this woman during your break since November, and she is young, paranoid and jealous .... so she snooped into his cell phone, found your number in there, and record to show how often he calls you .. and she phoned you, probably not even sure who was going to be on the recieving end. When she heard your voice and you introduced yourself ... she lied to you, telling you she was pregnant and had been seeing him all this time.
Because that's what paranoid girls do when they are jealous of other women to whom makes them feel threatened.
Because her story doesn't hold up .... a man who is fucking another man's woman would NOT own up to being the father, especially a man to whom she claims they only see each other on and off.
I'm telling you, as sure as I'm sitting here ... a man who is bagging another man's wife on the side is NOT going to man-up and claim ownership to a pregnancy, feelnstupid.
There's holes all through her story.
I wouldn't be so quick to believe everything she told you. Certainly, I would believe she exists, for she did find your number somewhere on him and he is angry if you mention her .... but, the rest of this I would regard as bullshit
Here's what probably happened ...
During The Break, he hooked up with her and then when the two of you decided to get back together, he told her he couldn't see her anylonger ... and she flipped the fuck out.
So, now she's going to attempt to fuck him over by messing up his relationship with you ... immature girls who are jealous do things like that.
In your position, I wouldn't approach him again about it. I would carry on as if it never happened ..... because if it is indeed a real-life issue of his, and if it is, then it IS a serious one. So, if it is true ... then it will blow up all on it's own.
You really dont' have to do anything ... expect be patient, and wait for the fireworks on her end when she realizes that she didn't win in screwing him over for breaking up with her.
During The Break, he hooked up with her and then when the two of you decided to get back together, he told her he couldn't see her anylonger ... and she flipped the fuck out.
So, now she's going to attempt to fuck him over by messing up his relationship with you ... immature girls who are jealous do things like that.
In your position, I wouldn't approach him again about it. I would carry on as if it never happened ..... because if it is indeed a real-life issue of his, and if it is, then it IS a serious one. So, if it is true ... then it will blow up all on it's own.
You really dont' have to do anything ... expect be patient, and wait for the fireworks on her end when she realizes that she didn't win in screwing him over for breaking up with her.
I thought HE was pregnant ! not her 
you get so wrapped up on his problems and issues that you forget about you
that's what happens when you invest too much time in an obviously shyte situation
that's what happens when you invest too much time in an obviously shyte situation
Well, besides him just being a Libra, let's talk about your situation in terms of him being a man & all the pain he's caused you. First off, this man has been torn between the 2 of you from the beginning (after all, that's why he "hooked up" with both of you at around the same time), but he's just acting like he's not torn because he's caught up & because now the Karma (baby) is smacking him dead in the face. It's one thing for a man to treat you right in the beginning and THEN use all of the lame excuses to step out on you, but honey this man was doing you wrong from the beginning. Once he knew that you were down for him & would've done anything for him he could've and should've made the decision to let one of you go (hopefully the one that he couldn't intellectually or emotionally grow with). But he didn't. And when that happens that means, you had no chance with him on a deeper level anyways. That means that no matter WHAT you would've done for him, given to him, or shown him, he STILL wouldn't have seen your worth or had any plans to treat you the way you deserve to be cheated.
Even though I don't condone cheating, I do believe that relationships have a better chance at lasting if the cheating started way down further into the relationship, in terms of time. And I say that because once alot of men give you the chance to prove yourselves to them, they'll be faithful UNTIL they find an excuse to run out on you. But the foundation to every relationship is the MOST important. And if he started out cheating, it's no suprised that he ended OUT cheating. For some reason, your Libra never made that break from the other woman or even you. And honestly, if you were in her situation, how bad would you really want a man who had the balls & courage enough to have unprotected sex with you but yet all of that courage & balls goes out of the window once the baby (the obvious result of unprotected sex) comes into the picture? Are you sure you want a man like that.
Men think they are doing us women a favor when they attempt to "dog out" or ditch the other women but really they are just showing even more of their true colors, because it's a known fact, if he'll do it to her, he'll do it to you. This man just wanted to have his fun & for some reason he took you with him even though you didn't sign up for it. Of course he's going to deny the baby. Men would rather have kids (if they could re-do it all over again) by a woman they are emotionally attached to
Even though I don't condone cheating, I do believe that relationships have a better chance at lasting if the cheating started way down further into the relationship, in terms of time. And I say that because once alot of men give you the chance to prove yourselves to them, they'll be faithful UNTIL they find an excuse to run out on you. But the foundation to every relationship is the MOST important. And if he started out cheating, it's no suprised that he ended OUT cheating. For some reason, your Libra never made that break from the other woman or even you. And honestly, if you were in her situation, how bad would you really want a man who had the balls & courage enough to have unprotected sex with you but yet all of that courage & balls goes out of the window once the baby (the obvious result of unprotected sex) comes into the picture? Are you sure you want a man like that.
Men think they are doing us women a favor when they attempt to "dog out" or ditch the other women but really they are just showing even more of their true colors, because it's a known fact, if he'll do it to her, he'll do it to you. This man just wanted to have his fun & for some reason he took you with him even though you didn't sign up for it. Of course he's going to deny the baby. Men would rather have kids (if they could re-do it all over again) by a woman they are emotionally attached to
It's almost impossible to salvage a relationship where there was no chance or loyalty in the beginning because he had already made up his mind in the beginning when he met you that he would not give up & give in to his selfish "man" ways. It sucks that he dragged you through this. After all, if he just wanted to "play" and do the "friends with benefits" thing, he should've only surrounded himself around the women who are comfortable with ONLY being that "friend" with the "benefit." instead of the women who have more self love for themselves & believe they deserve to be worth more.
And if he's denying the baby because he fears you'll leave, then that's backwards. He should've feared you leaving WHEN he decided to pull his pants down. But no, he took the chance anyways. He picked 20 minutes of pleasure 2 years of time, energy & love. If he's denying this because he doesn't want to lose you then he should've had that same "don't wanna lose her" concept when he was doing all of those other things wrong. Every time he slept with her (and probably others) he basically put your health at risk & your emotional sanity at risk (because love is the strongest emotion known to man) & any relationship like that is not worth having or saving.
A RELATIONSHIP WORTH SAVING IS A RELATIONSHIP WORTH HAVING in the first place
And if he's denying the baby because he fears you'll leave, then that's backwards. He should've feared you leaving WHEN he decided to pull his pants down. But no, he took the chance anyways. He picked 20 minutes of pleasure 2 years of time, energy & love. If he's denying this because he doesn't want to lose you then he should've had that same "don't wanna lose her" concept when he was doing all of those other things wrong. Every time he slept with her (and probably others) he basically put your health at risk & your emotional sanity at risk (because love is the strongest emotion known to man) & any relationship like that is not worth having or saving.
A RELATIONSHIP WORTH SAVING IS A RELATIONSHIP WORTH HAVING in the first place
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