is it possible to fix a shattered friendship?

Serious answers only please guys coz this is Killing Me?

I accused a good friend of doing something i later learned he knew nothing about. He retaliated, which caused me to get really nasty and say some Vile, Very Hurtful things, personal things which can never be taken back. Ive put myself through hell because of it. He hasnt communicated with me for over a year. I once sent him a "funny Pic" but never got an answer.
He's completely frozen me out of his life. This is one guy whos's
friendship id do anything to get back.
For what its worth, Hes a Typical Aries and im a Typical Capricorn.
After all this time, is it worth another crack at it?
Ive heard once you piss of an Aries (and nobody could have done a better job than me) youve lost them forever 😢

We all say and do things which we regret but once the damage is done, its too late!
Sounds to me like whatever you said really "Hurt" him and if its been over a year, dont keep beating yourself up over it.
Hes obviously moved on and id say "Its Over"
All you can do is learn from it and dont do it again.
Hope that helped :-)

PS that said: if he was a true friend, hed have contacted you by now.
Put it down to experience

People are in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

Youre right AMW, i used personal info that i was trusted with, turned it around and used it to hurt him. Usually im the calmest most rational person but if i get really mad, i can get extremely nasty and vindictive and i hate myself when that happens.
Maybe im wishing on a star but i dont believe we cant be like we once were. One thing i am, is the "eternal optimist"
Its just hard when the other person wont acknowledge you.
And thanks Dog's for your advice as well.

To the OP

Aries are VERY loyal, until the loyalty is not returned. You accused him and thus hurt him to the very core.

I do not believe that an Aries trait is to NOT FORGIVE, but he probably has decided to move on and just remember the good times. I highly doubt he hates you.

Aries ego is huge and they don't do well with false accusations.

If he doesnt want to know me, then he "MUST" hate me, thats how i see it. Ah well, nothing i can do.

I've heard that aries forget easily, so maybe this slight has already been forgotten/forgiven?

I would call and say that you have been thinking about them...

aries and cap relationships are hard when they go bad...

Hi, i want to contact him but, i admit, im "scared" of the reaction.
Just trying to build up the courage !!

Hey, I agree with Mr Nice - Contact him once more - a final effort'
If it doesnt work, Move On Dude, he obviously has.
There are many more Great People out there, your "ex-friend" is just one pebble on a beach full of em.

Clearly, the reason why you want to mend this is for your own conscience in knowing you screwed up.

Think about that ....


A year goes by, and during this time .. have you made any attempt to contact him? Or, did this desire to contact ONLY come after you found out you were wrong?

In his mind, he's likely thinking .... "She doesn't really want me, she wants to excuse herself from screwing up by having my forgiveness."

Whatever he did, or didn't do, way back then ... as a friend, you weren't suppose to use anything against him, even if he did do 'it'. When you retaliated, you proved yourself not worthy as a friend to him, for a friend would NOT use personal information against him, even if he erred.

What I'm getting at here ... you want to have his friendship again ONLY because you feel like you need to be vindicated from your own guilt .... and being an Aries, he's going to be intuitive enough to recognize that this isn't sincere.

He feels abused .. even now, as you attempt to find retribution from him so you won't feel guilty for what you did.

A person has to WANT to mend something FOR the other person's benefit in order for it to be worthy.

You haven't mentioned anywhere in here where you went out of your way to clear his name, for his honour .. you haven't mentioned where you actually did anything to mend the damage you've done to him .... your only aim in this is for him to accept your error, and forgive you, so you won't feel guilty any longer ... for your own sake.

^^^^^^ Not being a friend ... it's being selfish to your own feelings.

If you indeed want to fix this (so guilt will be erased) .. then you can't just contact him, all cutsey and expect him to just forgive you without any effort in actually mending the damage ... and that is what you are suggesting here.

You just want him to say words of forgiveness to you, without you doing anything on your end to repair the damage.

That's sort of like a husband who beats up his wife ... he just wants her to forgive him, so he can carry on with his life without any guilt, all the while, never really doing anything FOR her, for her honour, for her respect, for her trust, for her well-being, for her to be happy in any way .... just an apology to be accepted.

You are going to have to put your own obssession with having your guilt soothed over by an acceptance of an apology from him .. and actually DO what needs to be done to mend the damage.

I really don't get this in you, at all. This was personal information that was very sensitive to him .. and he's suppose to just forget that you betrayed him because you're now being cute and smiling at him?

You're going to have to go to the exact same people in which you spread the hateful gossip to about him and exalt him. He's going to have to have proof that you admitted to these people (assuming mutual friends) that this was your error, you spoke out-of-line, that you fucked up and that you feel horrible about it. That all those things were only said because you fucked up, and that you really don't feel that way about him.

You're going to have to actually FIX the part of his reputation that you destroyed.

Maybe then, he might consider you to be worthy.

most aries i know don't have a problem forgiving. in fact, they are the first to reach out to mend the relationship.

but when they get fed up, they're done. no turning back.

what did you say exactly? if it's as bad as it sounds, then my guess is you could go back to being on friendly terms at best, but not friends per se. question: would you have forgiven him if the tables were turned?

''Ive heard once you piss of an Aries (and nobody could have done a better job than me) youve lost them forever 😢''
''most aries i know don't have a problem forgiving. in fact, they are the first to reach out to mend the relationship.

but when they get fed up, they're done. no turning back.''

I'm afraid this is mostly true. Astrology always mentions that Aries are quick to forgive but it never mentions that they never 'forget' but they won't seek revenge just cut all ties.
But don't fight for it - they don't like being chased, they'll rather do the chasing - if the friendship was meant to be, he'll gravitate back to you eventually and won't talk about the past which is great!

P-Ang made some amazing points also - this is what I was thinking from a fellow Aries perspective!

A funny picture sent without mentioning what happened in the past won't work. Only a sincere apology will. I don't think any sign would accept a friend who made such a drastic mistake without at least acknowledging it would want to be friends with them again. If you want him back in your life, you will have to be willing to tell him how wrong you were and how sorry your are. It's grovel time 😉

The word "sincere" is key here ... and from the OP, it doesn't appear to be a priority. The tone of the OP suggests that there is guilt associated and wanting redemption, without any mention of sincerity as to how this mistake effected him, with her being the culprit for this injury.

Aries are very intuitive people, this is why once you've betrayed them, you have to work hard at proving to them that you are sincere .. they can spot superficial rather easily.

Though, it's easier to write a letter, and certainly, to do so would mean you don't have to face the person .. so you won't have to deal with initial reactions. However, this would likely leave the impression in his mind that sincerity wasn't the motivator.

A person who is honest in wanting to mend a broken bridge for the benefit of the other persons sense of well-being < = sincerity .. won't FEAR a reaction, as it pertains to the self.

anything is possible