Am I doing the right thing?

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by ariesgurls06 on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 and has 12 replies.
I'm currently in love with this guy I've been dating for quite sometime now.
Apparently while we where dating he already had a girlfriend... I promise I didn't know, I'm not a home wrecker... I promise. But their relationship is only based on sex. I had no reason to think he had a girl at the time because he was always at the club... Talking to multiple girls...
Well since we have been dating he hasn't been to the club... At all. We are literally always together... But it seems he was talking to the girl still. I didn't think he was.. Because his family went on vacation and he brings me. And I'm always around his mom.. She calls me and so and so.
I realized that he would see her once a week... While I was doing courses.
Finally I confronted him about the situation... And basically he explains that she is crazy. she has eating disorder and he doesn't want her to hurt herself.
Yea... I was like you need to figure it out.
Enough got to enough... Because she started sending me crazy messages on myspace saying he doesn't love me... and whatever whatever..
Last night I told him.. That until he handles this situation me and him can't be together.
Am I wrong?
I know that the situation is out of control and deserve better than that... But I honestly do love him. I willing to forgive him if the situation is gone.
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This is one of the best things I've read on DXP to date smile No, you did the RIGHT thing, the most level-headed thing and did I mension the RIGHT thing.
Whats the guy's sign?
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"This is one of the best things I've read on DXP to date No, you did the RIGHT thing, the most level-headed thing and did I mension the RIGHT thing."
Agreed! *laces up ice skates as hell freezes over*
APOCALYPSE!!

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HAHAHA!!!! I know Sea, you don't read this stuff often!!
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you're totally doing the right thing. make sure she doesn't go crazy on you and harm you.
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a friend of mine had this gf that wouldn't let him be for a long time. constant messages and emails that she'll kill herself. the usual attention getting behaviour. she cut her wrists on christmas evening so he'd come to the hospital. it took a while but he put the end on the whole drama. it takes a while for those crazy ppl to let someone go but it can be done. so, see where it goes.
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He is a virgo.
He told me that he use to date a girl.. and she died on her way to his house..
He expressed he doesn't want to feel responsible for someone getting hurt...
But I'm getting hurt in the act... Just knowing that what is "MINE" is being touched by someone else...
mmmmm.... I prefer when guys just cheat with someone they don't know.. because you know emotions aren't involved.
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I don't understand why you would want to be with someone... That you never see..
I don't think she is in love with him..
I told him.
She is one of those people that doesn't want to see someone else happy.
Because I know if he found someone he loved more than me... I accept him being happy.. Because time will heal.
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"she started sending me crazy messages on myspace saying he doesn't love me... and whatever whatever"

I agree with consensus >>>>>> tickled to death that we finally get to hear a Mature Woman's proper handling of a relationship issue. smile
However ..... I have some food for thought for you while you await to see if this man can also act like a mature adult with the handling of his relationship with you, and it references the above quote from the OP.

If this woman is sending messeges to your myspace .. then she would ONLY know to do so if he told her about you. She would otherwise, have absolutely no clue you even existed in this world, without him telling her about you.
Please think about the implications of what this could mean ..
1. Is he trying to make both of you jealous of the other?
2. Does he really care about her that much that he would think she should be priviledged to know about his personal life?
3. Would a guy tell a woman who is just his fuck-buddy about how he feels in his personal life? (she did mention the word "love", so indeed, he's telling her about how he FEELS)

And those are just a few possibilities ..... but, the point is ... he tells you she's just a fuck, and yet, tells her about how he FEELS.
FEELS ... FEELS
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I don't understand why you would want to be with someone... That you never see..
I don't think she is in love with him..
I told him.

^^^^ does that even matter?

How she feels about him isn't a part of the equation concerning you and him .. it only pertains to him and her.
You may have told him she doesn't love him ..... however, he obviously told her about how he feels about love, period
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Yes I completely understand...
She knows about me because...
She saw the pictures of me and him from when we went on vacation..
With his family.
Yes naturally he should care about her... Maybe thats why I'm not as mad as I should be.
But like you said... I know what I'm worth... And If I can't get what I want..
I shall find it elsewhere.
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try to forget about him will be the next step forward...block his contacts, exes contacts, etc...not worth looking back for...REALLY. Think about it, if you had a prob and he couldn't be with you all the time, he'll add another chick to the mix ...tsk tsk tsk...
lol dumping him straight away - true rammette style Winking
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