Are you able to date someone who told you that he/she typically uses no protection
This topic was created in the Relationships forum by whatisthisallabout on Friday, September 8, 2017 and has 78 replies.
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when they have sex with strangers?
Noooooooo
Posted by Jayc3onIf you had been on several dates with a girl you met online, and you felt ready to be intimate with her. Would you use a condom with her the first time you have sex? Would you always use a condom before you decide you want to date her seriously?
Nope
Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Noooooooo
Posted by GC02If you find that out after you have been dating for a month or 2, what would you do?
Hellllll nooooo!!!!
Would you just disappear, or would you tell the person his attitudes about sex bothers you and you don't feel you can trust him anymore?
Sure. He can penetrate my belly button. I don't care bout belly STDs.
Posted by Jayc3onHow if she got mad at you and said that she felt you didn't trust her?Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by Jayc3onIf you had been on several dates with a girl you met online, and you felt ready to be intimate with her. Would you use a condom with her the first time you have sex? Would you always use a condom before you decide you want to date her seriously?
Nope
Of course I would wear a condon. You can never get caught slippin.click to expand
Posted by bawlikestogomooHAHAHA. Has anyone tried to do that with your belly button? I never thought about using belly button as a sexaul organ
Sure. He can penetrate my belly button. I don't care bout belly STDs.
Posted by GC02That sounds like a good approach.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI'd tell him to get tested immediately!Posted by GC02If you find that out after you have been dating for a month or 2, what would you do?
Hellllll nooooo!!!!
Would you just disappear, or would you tell the person his attitudes about sex bothers you and you don't feel you can trust him anymore?click to expand
How if he gave you a vauge "well, I got tested about 6 months ago... "
Would you ask him if he's been with anyone else since he last got tested, or would you press him to get tested again?
Posted by whatisthisallaboutThe list is pretty long.. DJ and @rockyroadicecream are a fewPosted by bawlikestogomooHAHAHA. Has anyone tried to do that with your belly button? I never thought about using belly button as a sexaul organ
Sure. He can penetrate my belly button. I don't care bout belly STDs.click to expand
Posted by Jayc3onGood for you! I think people can be very manipulative nowadays.Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by Jayc3onHow if she got mad at you and said that she felt you didn't trust her?Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by Jayc3onIf you had been on several dates with a girl you met online, and you felt ready to be intimate with her. Would you use a condom with her the first time you have sex? Would you always use a condom before you decide you want to date her seriously?
Nope
Of course I would wear a condon. You can never get caught slippin.
If she don't trust you then don't trust her. I still wouldn't fuck her neither.click to expand
Posted by WarAngel1How if she appeared to be goodie goodie, but then after you dated her for a while, one day she slipped and said something like "yea, other guys I met online they didn't use condoms, either." How would you react?
Not really.
Would you confront her? Would you get mad? Or would you ghost her?
Posted by bawlikestogomooOhhhh. Sounds pretty sexy!Posted by whatisthisallaboutThe list is pretty long.. DJ and @rockyroadicecream are a fewPosted by bawlikestogomooHAHAHA. Has anyone tried to do that with your belly button? I never thought about using belly button as a sexaul organ
Sure. He can penetrate my belly button. I don't care bout belly STDs.click to expand
Posted by GC02I am not seeing anyone right at this moment, but several people who I met a while back have been pestering me to *hang out*. I think it's the retrograde thing that all the old people are reappearing. I don't know any of them very well but I kinda know what they are all about.Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhat's with the questions? Are you seeing someone like this?Posted by GC02That sounds like a good approach.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI'd tell him to get tested immediately!Posted by GC02If you find that out after you have been dating for a month or 2, what would you do?
Hellllll nooooo!!!!
Would you just disappear, or would you tell the person his attitudes about sex bothers you and you don't feel you can trust him anymore?
How if he gave you a vauge "well, I got tested about 6 months ago... "
Would you ask him if he's been with anyone else since he last got tested, or would you press him to get tested again?click to expand
I just feel I need to learn how most people deal with people like that.
Posted by WarAngel1Woo~~ I think you are very similar to me.Posted by whatisthisallaboutMy first question would be: where are your most recent test results?Posted by WarAngel1How if she appeared to be goodie goodie, but then after you dated her for a while, one day she slipped and said something like "yea, other guys I met online they didn't use condoms, either." How would you react?
Not really.
Would you confront her? Would you get mad? Or would you ghost her?
Anything less than I ask for will result in me getting pissed off, a confrontation and an immediate ghosting.click to expand
I usually ask people about their last test results and when the tests were done, but they usaully got pissed off. I don't think anyone actually showed me the results, they just got pissed off and tried to blame me
We're not raw doggin' 'til she's my lady and she'll never be my lady if she's HAVING SEX WITH STRANGERS WTF
Posted by ImpulsvI am not sexually active right now, but I was in a similar situation before.
Hopefully you've been using protection all along given it's only one or two months. Otherwise yeah on the same boat and belief
The first time I was intimate with a guy I was dating, he ignored me when I asked him to use a condom.
I felt weird so I asked him about his sexual history and found out that he never used protection unless the other person strickly made him to. After that incident, we saw each other probably 2 more time, but I insisted him to use a condom. He got really weird and felt insulted. Anyways, I am curious about how people deal with this kind of situation.
Posted by ImpulsvVery true. I respect people more if they always use protection.
Plus a sag once gave me the best advice ever regardless of status and how long always use protection. You don't know if your spouses are cheating and or with prostitutes cheating on you etc.
Posted by ImpulsvYou are right. I contemplated how I might be able to navigate the situation if it occurs, because one of them is like super hot and I have been single for a year now. Well, bad ideas anyways.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI do t even get startedPosted by GC02I am not seeing anyone right at this moment, but several people who I met a while back have been pestering me to *hang out*. I think it's the retrograde thing that all the old people are reappearing. I don't know any of them very well but I kinda know what they are all about.Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhat's with the questions? Are you seeing someone like this?Posted by GC02That sounds like a good approach.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI'd tell him to get tested immediately!Posted by GC02If you find that out after you have been dating for a month or 2, what would you do?
Hellllll nooooo!!!!
Would you just disappear, or would you tell the person his attitudes about sex bothers you and you don't feel you can trust him anymore?
How if he gave you a vauge "well, I got tested about 6 months ago... "
Would you ask him if he's been with anyone else since he last got tested, or would you press him to get tested again?
I just feel I need to learn how most people deal with people like that.
I mean you're calling them people like that so why would youand gauge. I'm only with people I respectclick to expand
I don't think I can ever trust him not to give me stds.
PS. We did talk about getting tested like 4 months ago, but he got mad at me and unfriended me on FB. He just began to message me again and I think the results will be the same. He will get mad again when I ask him to get tested.
Posted by GC02Hahaha thanksPosted by whatisthisallaboutOh so that's what this is all aboutPosted by GC02I am not seeing anyone right at this moment, but several people who I met a while back have been pestering me to *hang out*. I think it's the retrograde thing that all the old people are reappearing. I don't know any of them very well but I kinda know what they are all about.Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhat's with the questions? Are you seeing someone like this?Posted by GC02That sounds like a good approach.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI'd tell him to get tested immediately!Posted by GC02If you find that out after you have been dating for a month or 2, what would you do?
Hellllll nooooo!!!!
Would you just disappear, or would you tell the person his attitudes about sex bothers you and you don't feel you can trust him anymore?
How if he gave you a vauge "well, I got tested about 6 months ago... "
Would you ask him if he's been with anyone else since he last got tested, or would you press him to get tested again?
I just feel I need to learn how most people deal with people like that.
Love your tag name!click to expand
Posted by UrsaMediocreI mean, how if she hooked up with strangers from, say, Tinder, when she was between relationships, and then you found that out later?
We're not raw doggin' 'til she's my lady and she'll never be my lady if she's HAVING SEX WITH STRANGERS WTF
Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutI wouldn't. I require a clean sheet and condoms with my lovers.Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Nooooooooclick to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutLike a couple months later or a house, 2 kids, and a dog later?Posted by UrsaMediocreI mean, how if she hooked up with strangers from, say, Tinder, when she was between relationships, and then you found that out later?
We're not raw doggin' 'til she's my lady and she'll never be my lady if she's HAVING SEX WITH STRANGERS WTFclick to expand
Were these guys dreamy AF or was she barebackin w/ hobos?
Did she see a potential relationship w/ any of these IG models/railcar jockeys or were they just one-night stands?
There's a point system that could save this potential relationship lol
Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by shaymaciHow do you educate them if they are resistant to the idea of using condoms without making them feel judged?Posted by whatisthisallaboutI wouldn't. I require a clean sheet and condoms with my lovers.Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Nooooooooclick to expand
Thanks!
Posted by whatisthisallaboutCondoms are protection against disease and pregnancy. If they don't have the respect for you to use them and help you feel secure. You don't need to be sleeping with them.Posted by shaymaciHow do you educate them if they are resistant to the idea of using condoms without making them feel judged?Posted by whatisthisallaboutI wouldn't. I require a clean sheet and condoms with my lovers.Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Noooooooo
Thanks!click to expand
All about respect.
My bae actually asks me if I want them, even though he prefers to be raw.
I also know he's clean. Sooooooo.
Posted by UrsaMediocreHahaha. You are so analytical, but I guess you are right. It has to be case-by-case.Posted by whatisthisallaboutLike a couple months later or a house, 2 kids, and a dog later?Posted by UrsaMediocreI mean, how if she hooked up with strangers from, say, Tinder, when she was between relationships, and then you found that out later?
We're not raw doggin' 'til she's my lady and she'll never be my lady if she's HAVING SEX WITH STRANGERS WTF
Were these guys dreamy AF or was she barebackin w/ hobos?
Did she see a potential relationship w/ any of these IG models/railcar jockeys or were they just one-night stands?
There's a point system that could save this potential relationship lolclick to expand
I guess if I were married with kids, I probably would try harder to save the relationship.
I think trust is something that's really hard to rebuilt. I think finding out things like that make me question the person's morality ("maybe he's gonna cheat with this other girl who doesn't ask him to use condoms"), sense of responsibility ("maybe he has a child somewhere he doesn't even know exist"), and the meaning of our relationship.... I always have a hard time turning this kind of thoughts off.
Posted by FknNerdHahaha, so it's only a deal-breaker if they have kid?Posted by ItsMeRomanIf they dont have kids lol
@fknnerdclick to expand
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
Posted by shaymaciYou got yourself a very decent man!Posted by whatisthisallaboutCondoms are protection against disease and pregnancy. If they don't have the respect for you to use them and help you feel secure. You don't need to be sleeping with them.Posted by shaymaciHow do you educate them if they are resistant to the idea of using condoms without making them feel judged?Posted by whatisthisallaboutI wouldn't. I require a clean sheet and condoms with my lovers.Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Noooooooo
Thanks!
All about respect.
My bae actually asks me if I want them, even though he prefers to be raw.
I also know he's clean. Sooooooo.click to expand
I like how you say "if they don't have the respect for you to use them..." I think that's the key. They prioritize their pleasure over respecting/protecting the girls. Unfortunately, many girls enable that.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutThank you ❤Posted by shaymaciYou got yourself a very decent man!Posted by whatisthisallaboutCondoms are protection against disease and pregnancy. If they don't have the respect for you to use them and help you feel secure. You don't need to be sleeping with them.Posted by shaymaciHow do you educate them if they are resistant to the idea of using condoms without making them feel judged?Posted by whatisthisallaboutI wouldn't. I require a clean sheet and condoms with my lovers.Posted by shaymaciWhat would you do if you find that out after you have been dating for, say, a month or 2?
Noooooooo
Thanks!
All about respect.
My bae actually asks me if I want them, even though he prefers to be raw.
I also know he's clean. Sooooooo.
I like how you say "if they don't have the respect for you to use them..." I think that's the key. They prioritize their pleasure over respecting/protecting the girls. Unfortunately, many girls enable that.click to expand
And it all stems from respect.
If you really cared about this person and their comfort, wouldn't you wrap up for them?
A lot of girls do enable it.
That's their stupidity.
They should know to protect themselves.
Instinct.
Posted by InsertusernameYea, that's been my approach. That's why I haven't had sex for 7 months now.
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
I guess I need to think of a better way to ask people to get tested without coming off the wrong way
Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
I've learned here that heroes can spread outside of a condom...so...what's the point?
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameYea, that's been my approach. That's why I haven't had sex for 7 months now.
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
I guess I need to think of a better way to ask people to get tested without coming off the wrong wayclick to expand
I don't think there's anything wrong with asking. It shows you're mature and responsible. Guy I'm seeing said we need to get tested before we had sex, told him I was glad he brought that up because I had just went that morning for testing. He said great I'll go tomorrow . Both people are probably thinking the same thing but feel weird about bringing it up.
Posted by LadyNeptuneNice! Short and sweet! I will try that next time when an opportunity presents itseltPosted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by GemitatiI don't meet heroes in my every day life
I've learned here that heroes can spread outside of a condom...so...what's the point?
Posted by InsertusernameThanks for sharing your experiencePosted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameYea, that's been my approach. That's why I haven't had sex for 7 months now.
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
I guess I need to think of a better way to ask people to get tested without coming off the wrong way
I don't think there's anything wrong with asking. It shows you're mature and responsible. Guy I'm seeing said we need to get tested before we had sex, told him I was glad he brought that up because I had just went that morning for testing. He said great I'll go tomorrow . Both people are probably thinking the same thing but feel weird about bringing it up.click to expand
I guess those people who are resistant are probably not quality guys anyways. >
Patience patience patience
Posted by whatisthisallaboutI've meant HERPES!Posted by GemitatiI don't meet heroes in my every day life
I've learned here that heroes can spread outside of a condom...so...what's the point?click to expand
NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE TYPE IN CAPS ON IPHONES! ?????
Posted by LadyNeptuneHow dare you? ?Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by GemitatiHAHAHA. Make sensePosted by whatisthisallaboutI've meant HERPES!Posted by GemitatiI don't meet heroes in my every day life
I've learned here that heroes can spread outside of a condom...so...what's the point?
NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE TYPE IN CAPS ON IPHONES! ?????click to expand
That's why we all need to get tested first!! >
Posted by GemitatiYou mean be straightforward and to the point. I'm a monster.Posted by LadyNeptuneHow dare you? ?Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallabout...and spend life waiting for test results...lplPosted by GemitatiHAHAHA. Make sensePosted by whatisthisallaboutI've meant HERPES!Posted by GemitatiI don't meet heroes in my every day life
I've learned here that heroes can spread outside of a condom...so...what's the point?
NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE TYPE IN CAPS ON IPHONES! ?????
That's why we all need to get tested first!! >click to expand
Posted by LadyNeptuneAre you monsters all std free?Posted by GemitatiYou mean be straightforward and to the point. I'm a monster.Posted by LadyNeptuneHow dare you? ?Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameThanks for sharing your experiencePosted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameYea, that's been my approach. That's why I haven't had sex for 7 months now.
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
I guess I need to think of a better way to ask people to get tested without coming off the wrong way
I don't think there's anything wrong with asking. It shows you're mature and responsible. Guy I'm seeing said we need to get tested before we had sex, told him I was glad he brought that up because I had just went that morning for testing. He said great I'll go tomorrow . Both people are probably thinking the same thing but feel weird about bringing it up.
I guess those people who are resistant are probably not quality guys anyways. >
Patience patience patienceclick to expand
Exactly! Or they'll say, I've only been with good girls or clean women. Like," how do you know? Did you get tested? Do you know a lot of things are asympromatic? Don't be ignorant."lol
Posted by GemitatiThat's the idea.Posted by LadyNeptuneAre you monsters all std free?Posted by GemitatiYou mean be straightforward and to the point. I'm a monster.Posted by LadyNeptuneHow dare you? ?Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by LadyNeptuneGood idea! Stupid but good for...you!Posted by GemitatiThat's the idea.Posted by LadyNeptuneAre you monsters all std free?Posted by GemitatiYou mean be straightforward and to the point. I'm a monster.Posted by LadyNeptuneHow dare you? ?Posted by whatisthisallabout"I want to have sex with you. Let's go get tested together."Posted by LadyNeptuneI guess that can be a solution. How do you usually say it without upseting the other person?Posted by whatisthisallaboutSure.
when they have sex with strangers?
Just no sex until we are both tested. And of course sex will only happen with condoms.
So basically my typical mo when dating someone new.click to expand
Posted by InsertusernameOh yes LOL And I think many people have no idea oral sex can spread stds too.Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameThanks for sharing your experiencePosted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by InsertusernameYea, that's been my approach. That's why I haven't had sex for 7 months now.
Yes. Just get tested before we become physical
I guess I need to think of a better way to ask people to get tested without coming off the wrong way
I don't think there's anything wrong with asking. It shows you're mature and responsible. Guy I'm seeing said we need to get tested before we had sex, told him I was glad he brought that up because I had just went that morning for testing. He said great I'll go tomorrow . Both people are probably thinking the same thing but feel weird about bringing it up.
I guess those people who are resistant are probably not quality guys anyways. >
Patience patience patience
Exactly! Or they'll say, I've only been with good girls or clean women. Like," how do you know? Did you get tested? Do you know a lot of things are asympromatic? Don't be ignorant."lolclick to expand
Fuck no
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